Summer Magic
by movinggirl
Summary: You mean to say that Potter's family is coincidentally staying across the street from our beach house for the summer, Mum and Mrs. Potter are now randomly best friends, and they expect me to hang out with that git for two months? You've got to be joking.
1. Surprise, Surprise

**Hey there! This is not my first fanfiction, but it is my first multichaptered story. It's a Lily/James story.**

**The beginning is a bit different than any other L/J intro I've seen, so read it and tell me if it's a good different or bad different. Most of the chapters will be longer than this; Chapter 1 is definitely one of the shortest. **

**The writing style is a bit different from what I've ever done; it's kind of like the Bras and Broomsticks series by Sarah Mlynowski. Sort of.**

**Title: Summer Magic**

**Era: Summer before Marauders 7th year**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the HP universe. This goes for all future chapters.**

**Rating: T for suggestive comments and mild language.**

**Summary: You mean to say that Potter's family is coincidentally staying across the street from our beach house for the summer, Mum and Mrs. Potter are now randomly best friends, and they expect me to hang out with that git all summer! You have got to be joking.**

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><p>The world we live in isn't an easy one.<p>

Everywhere you turn there's something bad happening. Poverty, hunger, heartbreak, murder, rape, war, you name it, and we've got it. All the negative makes people want to find the positive. They search for it, they crave it. And it's there. We all know it's there. Where there's bad, there's good; if there's darkness, there's light. It makes sense, right? It's basically a law of physics: There's an opposite for everything to keep the balance.

On an earth where things can go tragically wrong, people like to call it "magic" when something goes inexplicably, coincidentally, perfectly right.

What is it when a man who has been unemployed for years becomes a billionaire after an unexpected job offer? Magic.

How do you explain a terminally ill child's wonderful, sudden recovery when his family could hardly afford dinner the next night? Magic.

A woman was depressed and had suicidal thoughts for years, but then she met her old high school sweetheart again after nearly a decade? It was magic.

Not everyone would call it magic, though. More realistic people would say it was luck; practical beings would say it was fate; religious communities would call it their god's working. Only a few would actually go so far to say something happened because of magic, but plenty of people nowadays don't mind saying an event, or heck, their _life_, was magical.

But it doesn't take much for a person to forget about the magic and focus on the bad. A few things knock a man down and life doesn't seem to go his way, and the next thing you know, you're hearing a story on the news about someone who tried to kill himself by jumping off a bridge.

It's a good thing I'll never have to worry about losing that magical perspective of life. Because no matter how bad things get, I'll know I'm magical.

No, seriously. Don't worry; I'm not one of those freaky optimists who could be stuck at the bottom of a well in the middle of a forest and still find something to smile about. I'm actually quite realistic, if not pessimistic. Definitely sarcastic.

The real reason that I'll always be able to find the magic in life is because I _am_ magic; I'm a witch.

I, Lily Sophia Evans, am a witch of the age of seventeen who attends Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It's a good thing, too, because these days it's getting kind of hard to find the magic in life.

So from the month of September to the month of June, I'm literally surrounded by magic. It makes it next to impossible to find life to be dreary when you know you can pick up a stick of wood, wave it, say some words, and make practically anything happen.

I guess it's cooler to me since I'm Muggleborn (my parents are Muggles, non-wizarding people). I thought I was just this freaky kid when all of a sudden _BAM_! Someone's saying, "You're a witch, Lily. Take a train to this castle and your life will be changed forever." And boy was he serious.

I'm assuming that people are going to think, "Well, good for you, your surrounded by magic and happy for ten months of school. You probably have extremely boring and Muggle summers," but they would be wrong. My summers are magical to me as well.

At times, I'll almost think that my two months at the beach house with my family is filled with as much magic as my ten months at Hogwarts; it's just a very different kind of magic.

It's hard to explain, really, but there's just something about my summers. Ever since I was six years old, my family and I have spent the summer at the same adorable beach house in Shrivers for eight weeks. It's a little blue house with four bedrooms, a living room, a little library, and a kitchen for my mum. And bathrooms, of course. It's also right on the coast of the ocean. It's so close to the beach you can hear the waves crashing at night. There's also a bunch of other houses around, and a town full of little shops walking distance away.

The blue house we come to has a wraparound porch and a balcony that will overlook the waves. Luckily for me, the door to the balcony is in my room, so basically the balcony is my own special spot. Petunia (my big sister) and I used to camp out on it, but nowadays it'll be used for me to stare up at the moon and think, or to sneak out late at night and meet the cute sixteen year old Bulgarian who was staying a few houses away…But that's a different story.

Each summer at the beach is different and similar, all at the same time. Every year, my room still has the rose colored covers and the house still smells like salt water and Mum's chocolate chip cookies. The hammock is still on my balcony and no matter how hard we sweep the year before, there's always just a little bit of sand on the porch and in the entranceway when we come back. The same street festival shows up every year as well as the expected new people, but every summer has something a little different.

The first summer here, when I was six, my family spent day after day exploring. The next summer Petunia and I attempted to make the largest sand castle the world has ever seen; we got pretty close. We went bike riding and sailing the summers after. When I was twelve, Severus spent a few weeks with me at the beach, and we got into all sorts of mischief. At the age of fourteen, I met a girl who turned into my best friend, Abigail. I got my first kiss on the beach at fifteen. I found a cave a little ways away on the beach with a girl named Jasmine when I was sixteen.

Each summer has its own magic and adventure to it, but this year just might be the last summer like that.

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><p>My mum is a baker. She owns a little shop back home where she makes cakes and cookies, occasionally cupcakes. In reality, she should have been a florist. Judging from the fact that my name is Lily and my sister's name is Petunia, one could easily tell my mother likes flowers. She has such a good green thumb; it's more like she was a green hand. I'm not quite sure why exactly she didn't just become a florist. I do know that she is happy as a baker, though. Her flowers are still involved in her life, however, since she tends to her garden daily and she's known for her fresh flower petals decorating her cakes.<p>

That might be why I'm so good at Potions in school. In Potions, you read the instructions and do what it says to get the final product. It's just like baking a cake. Except my mum's cakes never knock a person out, make him incessantly laugh, nor give him the best day of his life, but it's generally the same.

I once tried to explain to my fellow classmates what my parents do. My dad is an engineer, and I didn't know of anything like that in the wizarding world my first year, so I just tried my best to describe it; everyone stared at me confusedly when I was done. So after that horrible explanation, I decided to describe what my mum does in the wizarding sort of way. I had said, "My mum basically has the same job as whoever makes all the desserts here at Hogwarts." Unfortunately, I didn't know the house elves made all the food. It took almost three months for everyone to stop teasing me and telling me my mum was a house elf.

The thing is I'm really close with my mum. It's good that I have her, too, considering the war going on right now, but I'm not sure how much longer I'll have her for.

Mum has skin cancer.

She got diagnosed a few months ago, but I don't think there's really much she can do about it. She's taking medicine, of course, but a person really never knows. It absolutely terrifies me that she might not be here for the next summer.

That's why I'm determined to make this summer the best one for all of us.

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><p>There's only a few people who come back to our little beach house neighborhood every year. We're one of the families, but the Rohers, an elderly couple, regularly come back; sometimes with their kids and grandkids, sometimes just the two of them. The Fallys also come every year with their six children, but we don't see them that often since the kids aren't allowed to talk to anyone outside of their family.<p>

There are always the townies, too, but I don't really hang out with them. Some of the ones I know are okay, but the rest are kind of… Rather, people I wouldn't normally hang out with.

More often than not, it's totally new people every year, which is all the better to me.

When I was fifteen, I met Abigail, one of my really good friends. She's my age and a Muggle that lives in the very northern parts of England. She doesn't know I'm a witch. I wasn't too sure how okay it was to tell Muggles what you are, but I asked Professor McGonagall (my Transfiguration teacher and Head of my House) and she said it was acceptable, but dangerous in these times. I decided not to tell Abby. Not yet. I still write and keep in touch with her, even though she hasn't come back to the beach.

I also met Stefan the next summer. He actually did turn out to be a wizard, but he attends Durmstrang. He was quite the looker if I say so myself, and I had my first kiss with him.

Overall, it didn't really surprise me when I begin reading one of my favorite Muggle books_, A Tale of Two Cities_, and my mum says, "Lily, would you mind helping me make dinner? We're having company tonight!"

"Who?" I ask, already positive I won't know them.

"A lady I just met down the street. Her name's Elladora and her husband is Charles. They're new here, but quite lovely! They don't know anyone, so I invited them over."

I sigh. My mother thinks everyone is "quite lovely", and she's always socializing and trying to know more people. "Sure, I'll help." I get off my favorite wicker arm chair and set my book down to help my mum cook.

"They even have a son your age," Mum casually says. "I don't remember what his name was, but I'm sure he's so nice if he's anything like his parents."

This perks my ears up. A boy, eh? I'd just ended my relationship with Wes MacMillian over a month ago, so I was a free bird now. "What did you say their last name was?" I ask, hopefully just as casually.

My mother pauses in getting the food out of the refrigerator. "What was it? Patterson? Pensley? Oh, no, I can't remember."

Mum used to be able to remember everything. I wasn't too sure if that was changing because of the cancer or because of the stress of the cancer. Either way, I wasn't going to let her feel bad. "No worries, Mum. I guess I'll find out tonight. Thank goodness, since I haven't met anyone my age here yet."

Mum chuckles. "Yes, you will. Now I was thinking… How about pasta, salad, and my triple chocolate fudge cake? They said their son would eat anything…"

"What boy wouldn't?" I mutter, vaguely thinking of the wild animals the boys in my year turn into at mealtime.

Mum didn't hear me. "…and could you get out the tomatoes and ground beef? You can start making the sauce."

I maneuver my way around my bustling mother to the fridge. If this Pickle boy, or whatever his last name is, is as nice as my mother says he would be, and even remotely cute, this summer could turn out to be very nice.

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><p>After putting my blood, sweat, and tears into the adventure<p>

of raiding my closet and Petunia's (who isn't arriving for a few more weeks, due to having to spend "quality time" with her boyfriend, Vernon Dursely), I successfully find an appropriate outfit for dinner.

I picked a deep purple top with a denim skirt that hits the middle of my thighs and some sandals. It's slightly on the boring side, but at least it won't seem like I'm trying too hard. It's summertime anyway, and everyone wears shorts, t-shirts, and tank tops in the hopes that they'll catch some of the summer sun and tan.

I was worried about Mum at first. I mean, hullo! She has skin cancer and she wants to go to the sunny beach? Although, that magical quality of mine is rather useful, so I was able to cast a spell that will make sure every centimeter of her skin is magically protected from the sun. Now she won't have to wear those awful sunhats the size of an umbrella.

Mum said the Pansys would be here at 8:00. It's now 8:07. Hopefully this lateness isn't genetic, because I don't want my future husband late to our dates. Kidding, but if we're going to be friends this summer, punctuality is a necessity.

_Ding dong!_

"Lily, could you get that?" They're here!

I put down my brush (since I was trying and failing to make my hair look nicer) and race down the stairs. Upon realizing that this is the complete opposite of "cool and collected", I slow down and stand in front of the door and slowly count to ten. And then I open the door.

There's a boy standing there, but as soon as I open the door, he turns around and starts looking out across the street and a few houses down. I vaguely hear a fire alarm going off not too far away.

My first thought is, _He's cute from behind!_ And then I look closer.

Next I think, _Wow, his hair looks just like Potter's from school. And his glasses. And his body. And his…HOLY MOTHER OF MERLIN! It IS Potter!_

Potter is still turned around looking over his shoulder. A yellow beach house slightly larger than mine appears to have smoke coming from one of the windows.

Potter's face is torn between frustration and amusement. He starts speaking over his shoulder towards me; I'm still struck dumb.

"…probably burned the cake. Usually our maid does it, but…" He trails off and turns to look at me. Yep, that is definitely Potter.

"Potter!"

"Evans?" His jaw drops. "What are you doing here?"

What am _I_ doing here? What are _you_ doing here? A memory from Platform 9 ¾ a week ago hits me like a ton of bricks.

"Potter, I thought Black was joking when he said you were going to stalk me this summer and find out where I live!"

He had picked his jaw up off the floor, but it drops again after I say this. He looks scandalized by the idea.

"He was! I wouldn't sink _that_ low!"

I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying, "As if!" Just as my resolve is almost gone, an older man and his wife show up. I'm going to go out on a whim here and assume that this is Elladora and Charles, Potter's parents.

His mum is a little shorter than my five foot five self, and has shoulder-length grey hair that I bet was once black. Potter's dad is a little shorter than Potter's near six foot height. Unlike his wife, his hair has that salt-and-pepper look to it, in addition to some lines on his face. Being honest, I'm surprised by how…_old_ they are.

I look over towards the yellow house again; the smoke disappeared and the alarm is no long blaring. You got to love magic.

"Hello, dear," says Mrs. Potter, extending her hand. I shake it. "Are you Amy's daughter?" I nod. "Oh, then you must be Petunia!"

"No ma'am," I say. "She's my older sister, but she's not here right now. I'm Lily. Lily Evans." I don't know why I say my last name. I suppose I'm still in shock and can't think straight.

Mr. and Mrs. Potter look at each other, their eyes wide. "Bollocks," murmurs James.

"So you're the famous Lily Evans!" exclaims Mr. Potter.

"Sorry?"

"You go to school with James, don't you?" I nod again. "Merlin, of _course_ we know about you! James has been talking about you for years!"

"Wha-?" What has that little bugger been telling his parents? Oh, Merlin. What if he told them how I've rudely rejected and yelled at him those many times? What if at dinner they say, "Lily, please pass the bread, you cold-hearted wench!"?

"Oh, yes. All about how you're a Prefect and the top of your class and the prettiest in your year-"

"_MUM_," Potter forcefully says. His face is bright red and I'm sure mine is as well. I'm the prettiest in our year? That's a blatant lie. Who would have ever thought Potter would say something like that, though? Better yet, who would ever have thought Potter would tell his mum that? I bet he was just practicing his lines with Sirius to ask me out again, the obnoxious prat. I'm probably the only girl who has ever turned him down; he's practically obsessed with getting me to say yes now. And as soon as I would, he'd be off wooing another girl. Stupid git.

Mrs. Potter seems to realize what she is saying, and who she is saying it to, and stops talking. An awkward silence hangs over us. Mr. Potter pulls out a hanky and starts to violently cough. Potter looks at his dad with worry and says, "All right, Dad?" Mr. Potter stops coughing and waves Potter away, turning to smile at me.

All of a sudden, I realize how horrible of a hostess I am with making my guests stand outside and wait.

"I'm so sorry! Come on in!" I hastily exclaim. Potter snorts. I give him a glare usually reserved just for him: squint of the eyes, lowering of the head, closed mouth, and no blinking. Like usual, he ignores it. I hold the door open wider so all three of the Potters can walk on in.

"Mum, Dad!" I call after I follow them in. "Our guests our here!"

Almost immediately, my mother comes out of the kitchen. My father follows from the living room.

"Well, hi!" she says all excited. "So I see you met the Potters, Lily!"

Thanks Mum. Remember their last name _now_. No, really, it's okay. I honestly didn't want to know that the biggest jerk in existence is coming over to my house to have dinner.

"Er, yes. Actually, Mum," I say, "Pot—James and I go to school together. He's in Gryffindor and a seventh year as well."

Mum's thin once-red-but-now-a-slight-grey eyebrows shoot up. "Is _this_ the James Potter you're always mentioning?"

Mentioning? More like cursing. But, no, sorry, that's the _other_ James Potter at my magical school.

"Yes."

Mum shakes Potter's hand and says, "I'm Mrs. Evans, but you can call me Mrs. Amy."

Potter smiles and says, "James."

Dad leans forward and shakes Potter's hand, too. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Evans," Potter politely says.

Don't trust him, Dad. He's evil. Pure, uncontrolled evil.

Mum grins and turns to Elladora and Charles. "So then you two must be wizards!" Mr. and Mrs. Potter smile as their answer. "What brings you all down to this beach? I know I asked you earlier, but now that I know you have magic, you can tell me if the answer's any different!"

Mrs. Potter smiles again. "No, it's still the same: more quality family time." I look at Potter. I'm ninety-nine percent sure he wouldn't like that idea, but his face is impassive. "We needed a place to escape the magic, but I guess you can never escape it!" All four adults laugh. I want to run up to my room and hide under the covers.

"We must get together often this summer," continues Mrs. Potter. "Charles and I have never been friends with any Muggle adults before!" Looks like Mrs. Potter is just as friendly and social as my mum. Great.

While the mums are talking, Dad turns to Mr. Potter. "I'm Will. Nice to meet you," he says, shaking Mr. Potter's hand.

"Charles. You, too," Mr. Potter says back.

"That would be wonderful!" Mum exclaims to Mrs. Potter. "You three should join us for lunch tomorrow in town and we can show you around. Especially since James and Lily are already friends!"

It feels like time has frozen.

Oh. I get it.

Ha, ha, good one, Brain!

This is all one crazy dream I'm having, and any second my alarm clock is going to go off.

Okay, Clock, go ahead and beep.

Really, it's okay. Go on.

WHY AREN'T YOU BEEPING, CLOCK?

"That would be fantastic!" Mrs. Potter nearly shrieks. I open my eyes. Huh. I didn't even realize I closed them. "I would love to hear about what you do and how you live! And James was just whining a few minutes ago about how his friends, Sirius, Remus, and Peter, won't be able to visit this summer."

Mum lets out a (happy?) gasp. "And Lily was just saying how she hadn't seen any kids her age in the neighborhood lately!"

No, I wasn't. Really, where would you get a crazy idea like that?

"Now James and Lily can spend the summer together!"

"WHAT?"

You mean to say that Potter's family is coincidentally staying across the street from our beach house for the summer, Mum and Mrs. Potter are now randomly best friends, and they expect me to hang out with that git all summer?

You have got to be joking.

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><p><strong>Like it? Hate it? Want to see what happens? Put me on story alert and leave a review! Constructive criticism welcomed. Reviews make everything better.<strong>

**Next chapter should be up in a week!**

**-MG**


	2. Potter Relationships

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, alerted, and even favorited for the last chapter! :)**

**And I actually lied. This one is the shortest chapter, but all the other ones are DEFINITELY going to be longer! Chapter Two is (hopefully) not a filler, but it does give a lot of background information that I think is important. And now...onto the story!**

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><p>The first important thing in understanding my relationship with James Potter is that we never had a good one. It started our first year of Hogwarts; maybe even the first day.<p>

Yeah, definitely our first day. I had sat in a compartment with what would soon be the most popular pair of boys at Hogwarts on the way to the castle for the first time. I was upset that Petunia was angry with me for going to Hogwarts, but even through my misery and tears I could tell that the skinny boy with messy black hair was cocky and wanted to have some fun.

Severus had showed up and the biggest rivalry I've ever seen was born. Potter and Black picked on my best friend, so, Housemates or not, I was expected to dislike them. And I did. I would have even if they didn't start messing with Severus that very day.

Potter and Black were sorted into Gryffindor, met their fellow roommates, and history was made: James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew have been inseparable ever since. Seriously, it's almost like they're a group of cliquey girls. Remus is nice, and actually one of my friends. Oppositely, Black is almost as bad as Potter, while Peter follows the other two around like they're gods. Potter and his mates were (and still kind of are) the epitome of cool at school. They're all good at school, Potter's Gryffindor's star Chaser, and Black's one of the most (if not the most) handsome blokes in the school. All that put together makes one arrogant group of kids.

It hadn't taken long for me to discover that Potter was an eleven year old boy who loved to show off and cause problems. I had been a scared little girl in this strange world, hoping and praying I wouldn't embarrass myself or be the kid no one liked. For a good bit of the beginning of our schooling, Potter was an obnoxious jerk who thought the light shined out of his every nook and cranny, while I—let's be honest here—was a bookish girl who would much rather perform a spell well in class than see what would happen if I changed the words "a bit."

I snapped out of dork mode by second year, still doing well in school, but okay with having some fun. By third year, Potter and his annoying friends became absolutely unbearable, always pulling pranks and bullying and showing off. Let's not forget that their favorite target to embarrass and make fun of was my best friend. That's important to remember.

When we were fifteen, Potter had seemed to realize that I was one of the only girls in school who put him down and didn't fall to my knees in awe at the sight of him. Thus began the asking-out escapades.

He constantly asked me out in annoying and pratish ways, the next one always worse than the previous. I swear it was like he had a list that was titled "Ways To Ask Lily Evans Out So She Can Hate Me More." They really were that bad.

Barely ten minutes after our Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L., everything changed. Potter and Black had started teasing Severus—like usual—and when I tried to defend him, he called me a Mudblood. After That Day, I was done. I was done with Severus, done with Potter, and done with his stupid friends. Even Remus, who I actually kind of liked due to bonding over being Prefects, wasn't going to be a part of my life after The Incident. That decision actually didn't work out so well, considering we started talking and being friends again about two weeks after the start of our sixth year. Potter and Snape, though, were a totally different story. Severus begged and pleaded, but it was over. Everything we had was gone. I knew it was coming, I really did. I just didn't want it to.

Potter hadn't seemed to sense that I wanted nothing to do with him after The Incident. He tried to talk to me the next day after I finally emerged from my dormitory; once I made sure my eyes no longer looked puffy or red. I had only come out because of our upcoming Transfiguration O.W.L. (How I got an E on that exam with everything going on I'll never know.) James had come up to me in the Common Room, his ridiculous smirk on his face and his hand ruffling his hair.

"Look, Evans," said Potter, "about Snivellus, it was totally his loss. But if you ever needed someone to cheer you up—"

I'm a bit embarrassed to say I cut him off by saying, "Fuck off, Potter." His jaw went slack, and I marched on past him to the Great Hall for some lunch before the test. He didn't talk to me for the rest of the year, which consisted of just a few days.

Sixth year wasn't too horrible. He started the year the same as the one before by asking me out, to which I gave him a curt "No." In the past I shot him down in every possible rude way, praying he would finally understand that I didn't want to date/snog him. I eventually figured that being direct and forceful would work better than screaming and stabbing at his personality. It sort of helped. Overall, Potter left me alone that year, at least more so than before; I suspect Remus told him to. Thank Merlin for Remus. Potter did ask me out a number of times, but, like I said, I was done with him. No matter what he said or did, he couldn't get a rise out of me. Even when I saw him hexing other kids (which was surprisingly rare and was almost always Slytherins) and my entire being was urging for me to say something; I held my tongue and walked on by. Well, actually, if it was in the school hallways, I would say, "Please stop, Potter. Five points from Gryffindor." I _was_ a Prefect. And once I took the points, he would try and ask me out again, but I would just walk away.

In the beginning he almost seemed like he was trying harder after I refused to fight with him, but eventually he left me alone and went on to pursue other girls. Good riddance.

So by the time Potter showed up on my doorstop at my beach house, his parents excitedly talked and laughed with my mother and father during dinner, and I realized that Potter was trying to play footsie with me under the table while I ate my noodles (no one bumps into someone else's feet _that_ much!), I was less than pleased. And now that Mum, Dad, and I are currently standing on the porch with the Potters, saying good-bye and agreeing to meet at their house tomorrow morning at eleven, I'm pretty bloody pissed off.

I did survive dinner without screaming or storming out of the room, though. Mostly it was Mum and Dad talking to Mr. and Mrs. Potter, asking all sorts of questions and exchanging stories. Mum would occasionally ask Potter something, and he'd answer. Mrs. Potter would also ask me something and I'd politely answer, but other than those rare occasions, I zoned out the whole time.

Now all I have to do is send mental words of anger towards my mother to FINISH HER CONVERSATION, so the Potters can leave and I can send an emergency owl to Marlene.

Mum's hugging Mrs. Potter and…why I don't believe it! They're done talking! It went by so fast! I could have blinked and missed the whole episode! After all, they were only here for _two and a half hours_.

Good-bye, Mrs. Potter! Good-bye, Mr. Potter! I hope to see you all never again even though you were both pleasant people!

"Good-bye, Lily," says Mrs. Potter, and she leans in to give me a hug. I'm not too surprised; my family is a hugging family, too. Except Petunia. She said she doesn't want stranger's germs on her.

"Good-bye, Mrs. Potter," I say.

Leave. Leave. Leave.

"Bye, Mr. Potter." I hold my hand out to shake the elder man's. My dad says to always shake a male adult's hand. It shows that you're independent or something like that.

"Bye, dear," he says, before coughing into his hanky again.

Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately when you think that I am at the beach), he hadn't coughed at all during dinner; otherwise I wouldn't have eaten those two plates of pasta.

"We'll see you all tomorrow!" says Mum. The Potters turn to leave. I don't say anything to my fellow Gryffindor, or he to me.

Finally… I turn around to follow Mum and Dad back in the house when I hear my name being called.

"Evans?" Oh no. I slowly spin around to look at my porch. Potter's parents are walking on, but he's still standing at the foot of the steps of _my _porch at _my _beach house during _my _summer holiday.

I hear my parents walk inside and shut the door.

"Can—Can I talk to you?" He sounds nervous. Potter is never nervous. I cross my arms over my chest and narrow my eyes. I'm definitely not falling for it.

"Please?" He sounds exasperated now. There, much more Potter-like.

But no, you bloody cannot.

"Fine," I say despite what I'm thinking.

I suspiciously raise an eyebrow for good measure and make my way over to the end of the steps so that I'm standing directly in front of him. "What?"

He runs his hand through his hair. God, it's annoying. "I just figured that since I'm going to be here until the weekend before the first of September—"

"What!" That long?

"Yeah, didn't you hear my mum tell your mum that?"

Sorry,I was too busy counting down the seconds until I could be in a Potter-Free zone.

"No," I grumble.

"Well we are," Potter says with a slight edge in his voice. "And like my mum said, we're here for some family time, but I figured since our parents actually like each other, Merlin forbid," –I stare at him incredulously. What's he got to complain about?—"we could be friends or something this summer. It would make both of our lives easier."

My mouth hangs open. "We could be friends?" Ha! More like 'Can I snog you, Evans, since there aren't any willing Hogwarts girls around here?'

"Not happening, Potter." It comes out harsher than I intend it to, but whatever.

"And why not?" he asks. Persistent little bugger, isn't he?

"Just because I didn't want to snog your awful self at Hogwarts does not mean I would magically want to snog your awful self here!" I feel the urge to clap my hand over my mouth. That wasn't supposed to come out. That was supposed to stay tucked in the drawer labeled 'Great Comments That Will Never Be Heard' in my brain. I'm telling you, that drawer is pure gold.

Potter turns pink. "That's not what I wanted!" He blushes more, the liar. "I just want to be friends. That's all, Lily. That's it."

Lily? He hasn't called me Lily since the beginning of school; as in the very beginning. He must be serious.

"That's it?" I ask. I still don't believe him. And why should I? He's been nothing but rude to me.

"That's it. Swear." He crosses his hand over his heart and raises it in the air. I try not to make a sarcastic remark. "Plus," continues Potter, "if we're nice to each other, our parents won't bother us about hanging out together. But if you do, you know where I'll be. I'll be the one slowly and painfully dying of my own boredom since there's nothing to do here." He rolls his hazel eyes and grimaces.

"Nu-uh! This place is amazing! There's tons of stuff to do here." How dare he insult my beach!

Potter incredulously stares at me. "Sure," he says. "You'll just have to show me, I suppose." He grins and winks at me, and I feel the urge to smack the smile off his face. I think that would be "unfriendly", though.

"First off," I say, raising my voice, "you aren't allowed to hit on me. It's unacceptable, annoying, and the answer will _always_ be no. Understand?"

Potter's face falls for just a moment. I can see him grit his teeth and the flicker of playfulness in his eyes extinguishes at once. Or maybe I just imagine it all, because before I can even blink he looks exactly the same as before. "Damn," he swears. "Now what will I do for fun?"

"Hold your breath underwater and count to five hundred?" I dryly suggest. Ruthless, I know, but just because we're suddenly friends for no legitimate reason doesn't mean I have to be nice.

"Hardy har har. Aren't you so clever," says Potter. "So, friends?" He sticks his hand out. I stare at it.

"Just to be clear, if this is a prank and I find out it is, and trust me, I will,"—I glare at him—"then I'll curse you so bad, your kid will have a mark to remember the horror by." Potter gulps. Good.

"Nope, no pranks here. I'm just a devilishly handsome fellow here to brighten up your summer." He says once he regains his composure. He smiles. Arrogant berk.

"Great," I say. I turn to walk back up the steps.

"Wait!" I twirl around. "Does this mean we're friends?" Potter asks with a hopeful smile. I sigh.

"Maybe. I suppose. I'll think about it. Yes." No, you go ahead and sound like a blubbering idiot, Lily. It's quite humorous.

I don't know why I didn't just say no, though. That's what I really wanted to say.

His face breaks out into a grin. "Great. Fantastic. Ruddy brilliant. Right, I'll be leaving. Bye, Evans. I mean, Lily. Er, Lily my friend."

I have to fight back a giggle. If I knew he was going to be this flustered after I agreed to be friends with him, I would've done it ages ago! Except, you know, I hated him with a burning passion then, and now it's just a dislike I'll have to get rid of. I suppose it changed because of the last semester, where he _really_ left me alone. I guess my mind forgot how annoying he was. I apologize in advance, Mind, for the pain I shall soon cause you.

I roll my vibrant green eyes. "Night, Potter." He turns around and starts walking back, but he trips over what appears to be nothing. I burst out laughing. Potter picks himself up, wipes the sand off his knees, and keeps walking. He doesn't turn around, but I can see that his ears are bright red.

Who is this Summer Potter, and where has he been for the past six years? He's twenty times better than School Potter! Summer Potter stutters and gets nervous and trips, while School Potter makes fun of people who stutter, prides himself in never getting nervous, and trips others.

Perhaps Summer Potter could be a decent person…

Nope. Not happening. This is all an evil plot. I bet Black, Pettigrew, and Remus are standing around my house right now, waiting to ambush me with their new "brilliant" prank.

I step forward and lean over the bar wrapping around our porch. I don't see anyone, but for all I know, they could be invisible waiting until I turn my back.

Oh, whatever. If they do anything to me on my summer vacation, I'll humiliate them on the first day of school faster than they can say, "Please don't."

Just to be sure, I watch Potter walk away. When he reaches the door to his lemon yellow house, he jumps up and pumps his fist in the air. After he gets back to the ground he starts to do a sort of dance, but it's so atrocious I can't tell if it's supposed to be a Muggle dance or a wizard dance.

It's even funnier than when he fell. I let out a round of hysterical laughter. Luckily, Potter doesn't hear me, and he goes inside his house. I'm left standing on the porch with no one else to laugh at.

Dang.

I walk around the porch so that I'm at the back of the house and facing the ocean. The waves are crashing on top of each other, and the moon is just a sliver tonight. I have the craziest urge to run into the water and float away.

I've always wanted to skinny dip, oddly enough. Abigail and I almost went skinny dipping the last night of the summer the year she was here, but we both chickened out when it came to our bras and knickers. Good thing, too, because about five minutes later, some drunken blokes came staggering down the beach.

I don't know why skinny dipping seemed like a good idea then, or now for that matter. Maybe it's the closest thing I'll ever get to doing something indecent. Or maybe it's almost like freeing yourself and being all natural with nature. That's what Abigail said the summer before the last. She's into that weird nature and peace stuff.

I sigh. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to find someone to hang out with. Someone who's not Potter. I need to find a girl friend I can hang out with, at least until Marlene agrees that she can come to visit.

I guess I could hang out with Potter, but that's definitely a last resort. And when I say last resort, I mean last as in if there's no one else on the planet or Mars and my house and all the stores in town burned down and I have no food and I need someone to go with me to find provisions. Only _then_ will I ask Potter to hang out with me.

Okay, he's not _that_ bad I suppose, especially if he'll stop asking me out. And now that there's no one here for him to bully, he'll seem like a better person. But hanging out with Potter is still a last resort.

I make my way into my house and up the stairs and get ready to sleep before practically crawling into my bed. All of a sudden, I'm exhausted. I guess trying to restrain yourself from saying mean comments does that to you.

Once I'm all tucked in and comfy, I realize that I promised I'd send a letter to Marlene. Sighing, I get up in search of a piece of parchment.

_Dear Marlene,_ I write,

_How has your holiday been so far? You're so lucky you get to have an internship at the Ministry of Magic this summer! It must be nice for your dad to have connections like that. True, I know you don't want to work at the Ministry, but now you'll know for sure you don't want to! Make sure to ask your mum and dad if you can visit sometime. I already miss you terribly._

_Have you met any cute blokes there at the Ministry? Don't do anything reckless!_

_You'll never believe what I'm about to tell you, but you better believe it, because it's nowhere near funny enough to be a joke. James Potter is staying in one of the beach houses here. One right across the street from me. Oh, and his mum and my mum are magically best friends, and we're all going to lunch tomorrow. If this keeps up, I'll be going to the beach and boating with the Potters every day. Which means he'll see me in my swimming suit and I'll see him in his. I'll report back to inform you if the rumors are true that you could "lick chocolate off of his abs because they're that delicious," according to Jessie the Slag. _

_Love,_

_Lily_

I look over the letter for anything I might've missed, but my mind is a blank. I hadn't actually thought of going to the beach with the Potters or doing anything with them during the summer besides the lunch tomorrow.

But now that I think about it… Hmm, Potter without his shirt on. Now Jessie would freak out if I told her I saw that.

Jessica Hachess and Potter had dated for a good chunk of sixth year after the holidays, but they had broken up around exams. I don't know why (I hardly pay attention to that stuff), but I do know that Jessica would always sit on her bed in our dormitory and obnoxiously brag about how good of a kisser Potter was while they were dating. After they had broken up, she just glared at me. A lot.

I had asked Remus why they had broken up, but Remus just mumbled something about Potter needing to get some things sorted, and then he asked if I had any special plans over the summer.

If I am conceited, which I'm not, and I believe Potter might have actually liked me, which I don't, I would think that they might have broken up because of me. But that makes no sense, so I don't think that.

I crawl back into my sheets and flip my pillow over so I'm lying on the nice, cold side.

I don't care what Potter says about being friends. It could be a load of dung for all I know. Even worse, he could be serious and actually want to be my friend.

Either way, he better not expect for us to be best friends now. It won't be that easy, Potter.

* * *

><p><strong>As you can see, this isn't going to be one of those stories where Lily is like "Oh my, maybe James has changed ! I'm going to fall in love with this new and improved James Potter!" and then they're snogging by chapter five. It's actually going to take much longer than that. <strong>

**What did you like? What didn't you like? What do you want to see happen? Leave a review and tell me! I'll be having weekly updates on either Saturdays and Sundays, so I won't be away for too long. :)**

**-MG**


	3. Faking The Muggle Thing

**Won't have access to internet this weekend, so I'm posting early. **

**As always, thanks to everyone that reviewed, alerted, and favorited! And to those people who put this on their favorites and story alerts and didn't review...you know what I'm going to say...**

**;)**

* * *

><p>Oh, how I've missed this town. It's basically my home away from home away from home. (The first home away from home is Hogwarts.)<p>

I love all the little restaurants featuring seafood, the candy and fudge stores, and the shops selling beach chairs and towels. Everything smells like salt and sunscreen. And the pier! Don't get me started on the pier!

I can practically walk through this town with my eyes closed I know it so well.

It's a perfectly wonderful afternoon, and I'm walking through the town with my parents, Mr. and Mrs. Potter, and Potter. We're trying to find somewhere to eat. I'll eat anything as long as we get out of the scorching sun, but my parent's and Potter's parents have to be all like, "Well, what do you want?" and "Really, it's up to _you_!" In other words: We're getting nowhere. But no one else seems to mind except me. Or maybe they're really good at hiding it.

"Oh, Ella! Look at this lovely dress!"

Or they just really don't care.

My mother and Mrs. Potter rush over to a window at a little clothing store I've been into hundreds of times that never has anything good. My dad and Mr. Potter are strolling behind them talking about who-knows-what. I'm about to call it quits and eat my hand. My stomach starts rumbling. Again.

I didn't have time for breakfast this morning.

I start to wander up the street a bit, looking for a decent restaurant. Even though we just passed two. It's then that I see what surely must be a gift from the heavens: an ice cream shop. Yes!

I dig around in my pockets and find enough money for an ice cream cone. A couple summers ago I realized that money should be carried around at all times for any possible emergency. This is definitely an emergency.

"One small strawberry cone, please," I say to the tired looking man behind the counter when I enter the store.

I almost rip the ice cream out of his hand when he hands it to me.

I take a huge bite into the cone, only just restraining myself from shoving the whole thing in my mouth.

It's a good thing no cute guys are around. I'm sure this is highly unattractive of me. Unfortunately, I can't dwell on the hideousness of my eating habits as the ice cream is really cold. Like, _really_ cold. I took so much ice cream into my mouth all I do is stand there trying to swallow a bit of the freezing mush that is currently numbing my teeth.

It is a _really_ good thing there are no cute guys around.

"Watch out! The evil dragon is coming!"

"RAWRRRR!"

"Wha-?" I say as I turn around, my mouth still full of ice cream. The sidewalk is relatively empty, but I see a little girl running at me full speed with her arms waving in the air like a lunatic. I'm about to move but it seems that the ice cream has also numbed my brain (or I'm just naturally slow). I stand there like an idiot for about two seconds before the girl runs into me. Her flying arms hit my ice cream cone, knocking it forward and right onto my shirt.

Perfect.

I must have shrieked or made some sort of noise, because the little girl stops running, looks at me and my ice cream covered tank top, and immediately whispers, "I'm sorry." She looks about seven, and her eyes are beginning to water.

I'm still standing here with strawberry ice cream drenching my shirt when a boy around the age of nine comes running forward.

"Hey," he says, "how come you stopped-?" He sees my shirt. "Oh." He looks behind him at a teenage girl carrying a beach bag coming towards us. "You're gonna get it…" he teases. Almost instantly, the girl's tears spill out of her eyes and down her face.

I'm still standing here like an idiot.

"Tommy! Claudia!" the older girl admonishes when she is standing next to us. "I _told_ you to watch where you were going! And I said no playing games in the street, or else we'll go straight home!" While she rants, I take the time to scrutinize her.

She has shoulder length, shiny, chestnut brown hair and skin the color of melted caramel.

"Tommy, go get some napkins." The boy turns into the ice cream shop at the elder girl's command. I'm assuming she's his sister.

She turns to look at me. "I'm so sorry. They were playing a game and…well…I tend to be a ditz in the summer and I didn't notice them not paying attention either, so…" She trails off and gives an apologetic yet friendly smile towards me.

There are wide chocolate brown eyes on her face, as well as a splattering of freckles across her nose and cheekbones. She's not supermodel gorgeous, but man, am I jealous of her looks right now. She's just got that look about her that makes you want to be her friend.

Which is why I say, "Oh, no worries. I can clean up my shirt with my—" I stop talking. With _what_, Lily Evans? Certainly not a magical stick of wood that can do anything you desire! "—special cleaning hands," I lamely finish.

There's an awkward pause. Then the little girl giggles. The girl my age starts to laugh, too. "You're funny," she says.

"Thanks." Funny? More like crazy. The boy, Tommy, comes back with the napkins and hands them to me.

"I'm Lily," I say after I attempt to get the pink mush off my shirt. I hold out my hand towards the girl.

"Claire," she says, shaking. "And this is Tommy and Claudia, my little brother and sister. I have to watch them today because my parents are really busy at the restaurant."

"You guys have a restaurant? Which one?"

"It's a new one: Hyde's Appetizing Assortments. Yeah, I know"—she crinkles her nose—"the name sucks. I told my parents that, but they said it was 'original'."

I laugh. "So you just moved here then?"

"Yeah, but I've already met practically the whole town through the restaurant! Do you live here?"

"No, I live in the outskirts of London. But I've come here every summer since I was little, so it's like my home." I smile.

"Claireee," Claudia whines, "I want to go to the beach!"

"All right, hold on," Claire shushes. I feel a bit disappointed. My opportunity at a fun, Potter-free summer is leaving because of a little girl's need to go to the beach?

"Well, I better get them to the beach. It's so nice out here; we can't help but go basically every day." Claire lightly laughs.

I grin. Should I ask if I could come with them to the beach tomorrow, then? Or is that rude?

"But like I said," continues Claire, "I've met tons of people, lots our age. There's going to be a bonfire on the beach tonight around ten. Wanna come?"

YES!

"Sure, where's it at?" I casually ask.

"Evans!" a voice calls out. A voice that could only belong to one person: Potter.

I look behind me and see Potter standing where I had left our parents, waving his arm to indicate that the four adults had entered the restaurant right next to the store where Mrs. Potter saw the dress.

I hold up my pointer finger to signal that I'll be another minute. I turn back to Claire, who's curiously looking at Potter's retreating figure.

"Sorry, that's James. My…friend. We go to school together."

Claire's focus returns to me and she smiles. "Then bring him tonight, too! It's kind of a beginning of the summer thing. It's nothing too fancy. But I heard there will be plenty of people there. It's down this street, behind the crab shack and a bit down the beach. You'll be able to spot it, though, no problem."

"Great," I say.

We start to walk down the street together. Claire mostly tries to make sure her brother and sister don't run in front of a car and get killed.

When I reach the door to the restaurant, I say goodbye to Claire, Claudia, and Tommy.

"See you tonight!" Claire calls out as she's dragged away by the "evil dragons."

I enter the restaurant; I already feel like my summer is looking up.

* * *

><p>I invite James to the party. I don't know why. Claire told me to, so I figure I should. Maybe so he can meet some people, and then I would be free of him and my summers could continue on as normal.<p>

Once the Potter and Evans families go their separate ways after lunch, I hang out around the house with my mum and dad for the rest of the day. I don't have a second thought about bringing Potter to the party, besides the fact that it means I have to hang out with him more.

As I'm walking over to this house, though, I'm beginning to doubt this plan. Potter has _never_ been around Muggles who aren't related to any witches or wizards. At least, he hasn't been around Muggles where he had to actually interact with them. He doesn't know how to act, what to say, and—most importantly—what _not_ to say.

What if he tells everyone there about Hogwarts and Quidditch and magic? We'd end up having to get a trial, and what if the Potters' money and influence isn't enough? What if we get sent to jail because of Potter's fat mouth? I am not going to spend however many years in Azkaban with Potter! I'd rather just get Kissed and let it be done with.

I compile a short list of all the things I need advise him about by the time I make it to his house. Which means that I know about three things I have to tell him, when he actually needs to learn about a hundred.

I ring the doorbell and wait. I notice that the Potters don't have a car with them. I guess that means they're walking or Apparating everywhere. After about two minutes, Mrs. Potter finally opens the door.

"Lily!" she says. "Are you here to take James to the bonfire you told him about?" She lets me inside. Their house is similar to ours: wooden floors, white walls, picture frames everywhere.

I nod, and then she says, "I think he's done getting ready. Come in, come in!"

Getting ready? It's a bloody bonfire. Why couldn't he have just worn what he was wearing today?

"Sorry I took so long to answer the door," Mrs. Potter says as she shuts the door behind me. "I was learning to use everything in the kitchen. We have Pinka, our house-elf, here with us, but I'd really like to try and do things the Muggle way. I tried to last night, and I ended up setting the kitchen on fire!"

I figured it was something like that. But I'm a bit amazed that she would actually try to do some things like a Muggle. The Potters are one of the oldest and richest pureblood wizard families, and here's Mrs. Potter trying to figure out how to work a blender.

"Oh well. We've got all summer to learn!" Mrs. Potter turns towards the stairs. "James!" she calls. "Lily is here!" Almost a heartbeat later, Potter suddenly Apparates next to me. I shriek. How embarrassing.

"Aw, Evans," Potter says, "haven't you gotten used to my super attractive self by now?"He smirks. Mrs. Potter rolls her eyes and walks away. I wish I can do the same.

"Right," I huff. Then I actually look at him. "What are you wearing?" He's wearing navy blue dress robes that I can already tell cost more Galleons than I'd care to imagine. "We're going to a party on the beach!"

"I know!" Potter says defensively. "What are _you_ wearing?" He stares at my plain tank top and skirt.

"What everyone else is going to be wearing, idiot."

Potter falters. I bet he didn't expect that answer.

"So," he slowly says, "no one wears dress robes?"

"Er, no," I strictly say. "They usually wear shorts and a t-shirt, _maybe_ a skirt or dress if you're a girl."

"Does that mean I have to change?" he asks.

We've got a slow one here, folks! "Yes, Potter. Go change. And hurry or we'll be late." We won't actually be late. It is past ten, but there is no "late" to these things. I just like to bother him.

"Into what?"

Good grief.

"Argh!" I throw my hands up into the air for good measure. "Where's your room?"

"Oh, you wanna just skip the party, Evans? I won't mind at all."

"No," I say through my clenched teeth, "so I can help you find something to wear and we can GO!"

Potter stares at me, and then walks away. Why that little…

"You coming?"

Oh. He's showing me his room. Ha, ha. I follow him down the hall, but then we make a left and go up the stairs. The whole place has that typical beach house feel: homey but almost as if it's never been lived in. Our house lost that never-lived-in feeling years ago.

We walk down another hall until we reach the second room on the right and Potter opens up the door. I follow.

His room is relatively clean, but plain. It's cleaner than what I expected it to be, for sure. There are two twin beds in the room with navy blue covers; the one closest to the door is rumpled looking. There are some textbooks on the floor, along with a few shirts, trainers, and Honeydukes wrappers. I even see his broomstick. Overall, it's not too bad.

"Uh, welcome to my room?" Potter says/asks. He nervously rubs the back of his neck. Odd, considering he's never been nervous before. Except the night before. I have to fight back a smile at the memory of him asking to be my friend.

"Where are your clothes?" He points to the brown dresser on the opposite side of the room. I march towards it and reach out to grab the handles of the first drawer when Potter is next to me in a flash, his hands over the drawer, successfully preventing me from opening it. His cheeks are the slightest pink.

"Not that one," he mutters. It must be his underpants drawer. Now that could be scarring.

I lower my hand to the second drawer, and look at him, almost asking for permission. He nods, so I open it. There are a few Muggle shirts in it, a good amount of Quidditch shirts and four wizard band shirts. I grab a plain dark green t-shirt and throw it at him.

I open the third drawer, and find a wider selection of Muggle jeans and shorts. I pick some shorts out and toss them to him as well.

Potter holds the clothes and stares at me, his mouth slightly open.

"I'm going outside," I say, "while you hurry up and change. Please." Please makes everything sound nicer, right?

I stand in the hall for barely a minute when Potter comes out again, his hair looking even messier than it did before. The rest of him looks…good, I unwillingly admit. Green is a fine color on him.

"Okay"—I smile at him—"let's go, Potter."

After we say goodbye to his mum and dad and tell them we'll be back by twelve thirty, we head out.

I see Potter eye my skirt, and then he asks, "Where's your wand?"

"What?"

"Your wand. You know the magical stick that your life basically depends on…" He's talking to me as if I'm a four year old.

"I didn't bring it," I say.

Potter stares at me like I've all of a sudden admitted that I'm in love with Professor Dumbledore. "What do you mean you didn't bring it?"

"I mean, I didn't bring it. Do you have your wand?"

"Yes."

"Then if Death Eaters attack our party, I'll find you and you can Disapparate us out of there, okay?" I say it as a joke. Not exactly something humorous, but more so that Potter will get off my back and see that there isn't a necessary reason for me to have my wand.

It's quiet. "That's not funny," Potter solemnly and quietly says. I look at him. His face looks very serious all of a sudden.

I don't know what to say back.

No one says anything for a few minutes, and then I remember that I need to inform him of the rules. I tell him this.

"Rules?" Potter scoffs as if the word doesn't exist in his universe. Which it probably doesn't.

"Yes, rules. And important ones at that, so pay attention!"

"Yes, Mum," Potter mocks.

I stop walking. "Listen, Potter, this isn't about me trying to reign you in and keep you under control, like at school." Potter stares at me, the smirk slowly fading. "This is about you talking to Muggles who have NO idea about our world for the first time, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't cause the whole town to think we're loonies or have a Ministry trial on our hands, understand? Or you can just go home right now and I'll go by myself!"

Potter gapes at me with his mouth open. He's got a funny look in his eyes. Good. Now he knows I'm serious.

"Okay," he finally says. We start walking again in silence.

"What are the rules?" he asks after we have a long uncomfortable silence.

"Right," I say, "Rule Number One: We go to a very small, nondescript school by the name of St. Peter's in the outskirts of Northern England. We'll be entering our last year of schooling in September. Just keep it simple, and try and avoid specific questions about what school is like and what you're going to do afterwards. I established that St. Peter's is a boy/girl school ages ago, so we're good there."

"Don't most girls go to all-girls schools?" the boy beside me curiously asks.

Damn. I shouldn't have brought that up. "Yes, but Severus came here with me once, and that's what I said then, so that's what I'm saying now," I tersely respond.

"Snivellus came here with you?" He sounds disgusted. I take a peek at his face and see that he looks it, too. I hope he isn't thinking anything perverted about us staying in the same house. He probably is, though. My thoughts are confirmed when Potter speaks again.

"Did you guys ever—?" He voice oozes revulsion and he waves his hands in the air. I don't have the desire to tell him that we were twelve when we came here.

As if Severus and I would ever…Oh. Now I have that idea in my mind! I don't want to think about us like that. It's hard enough to think about how we used to be friends; the possibility that we could've been more…

Okay, change of topic. Now.

"No. Now, Rule Number Two: No 'Oh, my Merlin!' or 'Holy, Agrippa!' or 'What in the name of Godric?', okay? Muggles don't know who they are."

"What? Then what do they say instead?"

I have to stop and think about that one. "Usually just 'Oh my God' or 'Good grief' or something like that."

Potter makes a face. "Weird."

"Just try to avoid phrases like the ones I just told you."

"Fine," Potter grumbles. "You do know that I'm not totally stupid with Muggles, right? I mean, when I came over to your house I thought you were a Muggle. And I told you our maid usually cooks, when it's really our house-elves and—"

He catches my glare. "Right, what's next?"

"Okay, Rule Number Three: I don't know if there's going to be alcohol or not, but if there is, don't drink too much of anything. You don't know how different Muggle drinks are from Firewhiskey and such."

I hear a snort come from beside me. Did he…Did he just snort? At me? "Please, Evans, give me a little credit. We've had Muggle drinks."

"Oh, yes, silly me. I forgot that you and your boys have had everything with a drop of alcohol in it," I sarcastically respond.

"We mustn't forget these things, Lily!" he says in a singsong voice. I roll my eyes. "Any other rules?" he inquires.

"This is the most important rule. Rule Number Four: If anyone brings something up that you don't know, pretend you know it. If they ask you what you think of something that you don't know, say, 'Terribly sorry, but that just reminded me of something I needed to ask Lily. Excuse me.' And then pull me aside and we can pretend to talk about something important. "

"'Terribly sorry?' What prat says 'terribly sorry?'"

"Plenty of people say terribly sorry, Potter!"

"Name one person who isn't a prat that says it."

"We—"

All right, fine. I was going to say Wes, but he was sort of a prat. I don't know why I dated him. Anyway, I try to quickly think of someone else who says 'Terribly sorry' to cover up my mistake, but Potter catches my slip-up before I can.

"Were you going to say Wes? I am _not_ saying anything that git says!"

"Don't be dramatic, Potter."

"Don't be stupid, Evans. Can you look me in the eye right now and tell me that that guy wasn't a loser?"

I feel his gaze on me and I turn to look at him, fully prepared to tell him that Wes MacMillian was not a loser, but as soon as my green eyes are focused on his hazel ones, I can't. He's absolutely, one hundred percent right. I mean, Wes yelled at me for disturbing his studying time when I tried to snog him that _one_ time in the library! Needless to say, we broke up one week later. I turn away from Potter.

"Rule Number Six," I say louder than necessary over Potter's laugh, "is that if anyone asks, we're friends." He immediately stops laughing. "And not as in we became friends last night, but that we've been friends. It's too difficult to explain that we go to a magical school together where we argued for years because you're a jerk but then you used to ask me out all the time but bullied my best friend who stopped being my best friend after he insulted my blood in front of half the school after you humiliated him so then we ignored each other for the past year, which is how I liked it because I don't like you, and now we're only at this party together because our parents want to observe each other or something like that." I say the last part in quite a rush, but it feels good to get off my chest.

Potter doesn't say anything. His brow is furrowed and he's got his hands shoved into his pockets.

"A bit harsh, don't you think, Evans?" he finally attempts to jokingly say, though I can't find a trace of humor in his voice.

"Is it not true?" I ask. He doesn't respond.

We don't say anything else, but I can already see a group of people and a bonfire down the beach.

* * *

><p><strong>And that is our very first official OC character, Claire! No worries; there will be more. But not an overwhelming amount. If anything, there's very few... James is still ignorant about Muggles, obviously. (Dress robes...honestly...) Also, <strong>**just because they're saying they're friends, doesn't mean they're actually friends. Yet!**

**What did you like, what didn't you like? The next chapter will be up in about a week again. Keep those reviews and such coming! ;D**

**-MG**

**HOLY MOTHER. In chapter two I wrote that Lily almost went skinny dipping with Claire that one summer, but it was supposed to be Abigail. her very best Muggle friend! So to everyone confusedly scratching their heads, this is the first time Lily ever met Claire, and her almost skinny dipping-nature-hippie Muggle friend is Abigail. Thanks to NegligibleNaina for pointing that out!**


	4. Party People

**All those reviews, alerts, and favorites make my day. Thanks so much and keep them coming. :)**

**And sorry for the wait. I had never been so overloaded with homework before... But don't worry, updates will almost always be weekly! **

**Also, I've never been to a bonfire party on a beach in England in the 70s. So just bear with me, yeah?**

* * *

><p>"Hey, look! If it isn't little Lily Lu Evans!"<p>

Oh, God. Please don't let it be him.

I turn to my left and see a stocky guy making his way towards Potter and me. He has a tuft of hair on his chin; obviously an attempt on a beard. The bloke stumbles, but catches himself (and his drink) and starts laughing. Yup, it's him.

"Anthony, hey!" I spit out through the fake grin plastered on my face.

Anthony leans forward and kisses me on the cheek. He smells of beer and car grease. Yuck. "Where have you been, Lily Lu? The last time I saw you, you had your hair in pigtails!" I blush. Yeah, when I was_nine_! All right, twelve. Fine, fourteen! Sheesh!

I vaguely wave my hand and say, "Oh, you know, here and there. I'm here every summer, so I guess we've just missed each other while I've been having fun and doing good things and you've been drinking and doing illegal things!" I swear Anthony doesn't hear a word of what I say. I knew he wouldn't, though, which is why I said it.

Anthony looks me up and down. "And last time I saw you," he says, "you did _not_ look like that." He looks into my eyes and grins. Ack.

"Er, thanks, Anthony, but really—"

"What have I said about calling me Anthony? It's Tony!" he declares.

"Well, Tony"—I take a step away from Tony and yank Potter forward, hoping to take the attention off of me—"this is James." The name feels odd on my tongue, but if people are going to think we're friends, we might as well call the other person by his/her first name. At least in public.

"Nice to meet you, buddy." Tony shakes Potter's hand. "You Lily Lu's boyfriend? She's a keeper!" Tony starts laughing again.

Potter doesn't smile. In fact, his face is completely vacant. If he's going to judge all Muggles on Tony, then he's probably trying to think of some escape plan.

"No," I say, "we're just friends from school. And I promised him I'd show him around, so we must be off! Bye, Tony!" I take Potter's arm and dash away.

"Lily Lu?" Potter mutters. His voice is full of mockery and humor.

"I have no idea," I say back. "I just go with it. But the guy's a drunk. Definitely stay away from him."

"Noted. How do you know him?"

"We were on the same rollercoaster cart at the town fest a couple summers ago. I've seen him around town and we've talked, but like I said, he's not really someone I'd want to get close to."

"What's a rollercoaster?"

"You don't know what a rollercoaster is?" Merlin!

My face must have a look of pure shock on it for Potter says, "No?"

"I'll take you on one when the fest comes this year. It's like a ride…and it feels like you're flying, but you're on this track…" How do you explain what a rollercoaster is?

"Do I get to sit close to you on it?"

I knew the annoying, flirty Potter was still there. Damn. "Not if you keep talking like that, you won't." He doesn't respond.

"Let's go get a drink," I say. We start walking and I wave to a few people I vaguely know. We reach a blue cooler that's (hopefully) full of a variety of drinks.

It is. I dig to the very bottom and pull out a Coca-Cola. "Want one?" I ask Potter.

"What is it?"

"What is it?" How does he not know what he's missing! I pull out a second one and hand it to him. "Just drink it. It's like…happiness in a can."

Potter incredulously looks at me, but I stare back, daring him to drink it. He opens it and takes a sip. Then he looks into the can. And then he takes another sip. He swishes it around in his mouth, and then finally swallows. He reads the label on the bottle, and then takes another sip.

For the love of all that is good in this world!

"Well?"

Potter smiles. "It's amazing."

I smile. "I told you it would be!"

Potter grins at me. My stomach twists. Even it knows it's unnatural to be getting along with Potter. But is it necessarily a bad thing?

Potter and I stand there, drinking our Cokes, and I look for someone to talk to, although I'm not sure that's the best idea. I want to go socialize and meet new people, but I'm afraid of leaving Potter on his own. I also doubt he'd be cool with me dragging him to go meet people.

Someone tries to get a drink. We move to the side so that we aren't blocking the coolers.

"As much fun as this is—" Potter starts to say, all dramatic. Oh, please. We were barely standing there for two minutes! "Who's that?" he practically demands.

I follow his eyes to see Felicity Jorgens. This doesn't surprise me. The girl is practically a goddess. Girls want her long blonde hair and flawless skin. Boys _want_ her enormous breasts and buttocks she frequently flaunts.

"That, Mr. Potter," I say, "is Felicity Jorgens. She is the most envied _and_ most desired girl here in this town. She's also the biggest slag, since everyone who wants her basically gets her." Potter's eyes light up at this. Stupid hormonal teenage boy. "Not that it matters, since she's been on-and-off dating her boyfriend, Calvin, for the past only-God-knows-how-many years."

As if on cue, a guy walks up to Felicity. She screams, jumps into the bloke's (Calvin's) arms, wraps her legs around his waist, and gives a thorough investigation of his throat with her tongue. A couple other people look around to see who screamed and why, but upon seeing Felicity and Calvin (with Calvin's hands groping Felicity's butt), they promptly turn away. Even Potter, one of the unofficial snogging professors at school, looks away with disgust on his face. I don't blame him.

"Never mind," he mumbles.

"Good choice," I say.

There's an awkward silence. Do I say something? What do I say? "So how are you on this fine night of interacting with crazy Muggles, boy-I-hate-but-happen-to-hate-less-than-awkward-silences?" Yeah, right.

"So who else do you know?"

"Huh?"

"Who else do you know here?" _Duh_, he practically says.

"Um," I say, looking around trying to find someone, "the bloke with the spiky hair to the left of Felicity and Calvin is Jerry. He and the three guys with him have a band. I can't remember what they're called, but they're good. They usually play in the street fair at the end of the summer."

Potter nods in interest. I look around some more.

"The girl with the skirt to her ankles at three o'clock is Gladys." Potter makes a face at the name. "Yeah, I know," I agree. "Her mum owns that awful clothing store our parents were looking at this morning. Her mum's really conservative and makes her dress like that, but when Gladys comes to these parties, she flirts with, like, every guy, and then refuses to even let them kiss her on the cheek. She's known as a total tease, but she's so funny, everyone likes her." Potter subtly stares at Gladys. I have to admit, the boy's a natural when it comes to spying and gossiping in public.

"Oh! This will interest you: See the bloke directly in front of us, a way down? The one chugging beer? That's Robert, a total party animal. Like, raving drunk lunatic. His parents are the best doctors in this town. And his twin sister, Rebecca"—I search around for her—"over there, at seven o'clock, comes to these things with her own water bottle and talks to everyone about how we need to recycle more, because the stars are frowning upon us."

Potter snorts. "Seriously?"

"Swear."

"She'd probably love to get to know a centaur. 'You must not drink that deathly vile of alcohol, or Uranus shall become unnaturally bright at night!'" Potter says the last phrase in a deep, solemn voice. I laugh. He joins in.

Blimey, would you look at that! He's funny!

Once I'm left slightly giggling, I see Katelyn Hendricks, someone who I had talked to once the summer before, but actually really liked.

"That's Katelyn," I say. "She was pregnant last summer."

I watch Potter's face when I say it. I expect his facial expression to change, just slightly, but enough to show that in his mind she just got kicked off the pedestal he had her pegged on, all the way down to Slag Town. It's sad, but that's usually what happens nowadays.

I'm surprised. Potter doesn't make any kind of disgusted face. The only thing that changes is the softening of his eyes as he glances at her again.

"I'm impressed," I blurt out. Oh, Mouth, be a dear and NOT say everything Brain thinks! "Er, I meant, uh, never mind."

"Why?" Potter asks, turning to look at me again.

Do I give him the honest answer or the less stupid answer? Honest…less stupid…honest…less stupid…Eh, what the hell. It's Potter.

"Most people would instantly judge her on that. They'd think she's trashy."

"Everyone makes mistakes," Potter seriously says.

"And you don't think that mistake makes her a slag?" I don't think so, but I want to know if he does.

"No," he says seriously. "If we judged everyone on their past mistakes, we'd get nowhere."

Almost instantly, my mind flashes back to a much suppressed memory: Potter with Black hanging Severus upside down. Potter asking me out and running his hands through his hair. Severus uttering that single word that effectively ended our friendship. Me screaming at Potter that I would rather date the Giant Squid…

I wonder if he sees the double meaning of his words. I can't help but say, "But sometimes it doesn't matter if it could be a mistake. It proves what kind of person someone is."

Potter stares at me. He definitely catches on to what I'm hinting at. "Or what kind of person they _were_."

Were? Is he saying he's different? I'll believe that when I see it. But then again, he pretty much stopped bullying kids last year… I don't know what to say back. This conversation just got deadly serious. And I can't do serious with Potter. Not yet.

"Don't you want to hear the rest of my gossip?" I ask in a super snotty tone. I may or may not have been imitating Jessica from school. Potter laughs. Guess he didn't catch the jab at his ex-girlfriend.

"Sure."

"Hmm..." I tap my chin in a thoughtful way as I subtly look around us. As I turn to face Potter, I see someone very familiar. "I don't know too many other people. Not a whole lot come back. But there's a girl behind you, with red hair, just like mine. She talks a mile a minute, but she's probably the nicest girl you'll ever meet. Her name's Darcie. Don't turn yet…not yet…okay, look!"

Potter casually turns his head to look around and sees Darcie talking with two other girls, one who I identify as Claire. Claire! My future beach best friend for the summer! Hey, Claire! Come over and say hi, Claire!

"What's the dirt on her?"

"Nothing really, but everyone confuses us because of the hair. They say it's exactly the same, but she has—"

"Yours is prettier," Potter interrupts.

"—bangs and I—uh, what?" Potter shrugs. "No, it isn't!" I scoff. "You didn't even get a proper look at her!"

Potter and I look at Darcie, and Claire makes eye contact with me. I wave and she starts heading over. VICTORY!

"Yeah, yours is prettier," Potter says, breaking me out of my mental victory dances.

"Uh, thanks," I say. Is that—is that the first _real_ compliment I've ever gotten from Potter?

"Hey!" Claire says, once she's standing with us. "Glad you could make it!"

I smile. "Me, too. Claire, James. James, Claire."

"Hi," Potter says, giving Claire his trademark grin. Oh, brother. I resist the urge to roll my eyes.

"Hi," Claire shyly says while…twisting a lock of hair around her finger? And cocking her head to the side? Did she…did she just…BAT HER EYELASHES AT POTTER?

Holy bloody buggering piece of sh—

Thank you. I don't know what I did to deserve this, Karma, but I'm just going to tell you this now: I don't think I did anything to deserve getting stuck with Potter for my summer AND having my future beach buddy become infatuated with him! I did cheat off of Peggy in Transfiguration class first year, but that class is hard! And I'm a Muggleborn! And…that was bad of me, I admit. And making up all my Divination work can't be bad, since everyone does it. And I'm almost _positive_ Professor Trachtenus _knows_ that! And putting all of Jessica's knickers and bras in the Common Room with a Sticking Charm _probably_ wasn't the nicest thing to do, but she did "accidentally" pour PERMANENT RED PAINT in my trunk and over my homework! AND she's always glaring at me. Overall, I don't think any of those acts were bad enough for this cruel punishment, Mr. Karma. So if you would reverse this whole mess, I'd appreciate it.

No?

Fine, I'll deal with it myself.

"So what brings you down here?" Claire asks.

Potter sighs. "Just needed somewhere to escape after my bad breakup…" He looks past Claire with a sad look on his face.

…He's joking, right? Someone tell me he's joking!

"You poor thing," Claire coos. "I understand."

…She's joking, right? Someone tell me she's joking!

"Yes…" Potter puts on an enthusiastic face. "Now I'm ready for some fun!" He grins at Claire. She giggles.

Oh, Merlin! I attempt to tune them out and look around for a way to escape. Everyone's already engaged in some boring conversation. I just might fake a headache and go ho—HELLO! Who are you, you fine piece of eye candy?

There's a very attractive bloke standing to my far right near the bonfire. He's standing with another guy and girl, but he's not talking.

He's being a third wheel as well! We're soul mates!

I turn back to Claire and Potter, and randomly nod my head. I don't think they even know I'm there anymore. It sounds like Claire's talking about her parent's restaurant, while Potter is listening intently. Yeah, right.

I casually take another peek at the guy. He's got short, dirty blonde hair and sharp angles in his face. He's still not participating in the conversation…now he's looking around…now he's looking at Claire and Potter…now he's…good grief. He's staring at me staring at him! What do I do?

I smile. Just a nice, friendly smile. It's a good thing I'm so smooth. He smiles back. I look away.

Smooth. Real smooth.

"Yeah, I agree," I randomly say, forcing myself into Potter and Claire's conversation, though I have no idea what they're talking about.

Potter raises an eyebrow at me. Claire, however, seems to think that I was listening to her the whole time.

"See! She agrees with me! Honestly, I tried telling my parents this a hundred times, but they keep saying 'Creativity is everything!' Like, what is that?" Oh…she's still talking about her parent's restaurant. Okay.

I casually look around again. The bloke doesn't see me staring, since he's now keenly listening to his friends' conversation.

Wait, no! He looks up and sees me staring _again_!

Forget smooth, I quickly move my eyes to a different group of people.

I contemplate the idea of talking to him. On one hand, what harm could it do? On the other, I just looked like a stalker. But then again, I _am_ a Gryffindor.

Okay, I'll walk over there in three…two…one...GO!

Screw the House, I'm a chicken. Not even the Hufflepuffs would want me. I'm an embarrassment to wizarding kind.

I take a sip out of the Coca-Cola I'm still holding. Wait, that's it!

"I don't like this drink; I'm going to go get a new one. Be right back," I tell Claire and Potter.

Potter looks at me. I don't think he believes my lie. Whatever. "'Kay!" Claire says. I smile at her.

I walk back over to the coolers, casually passing the bloke I was NOT previously staring at. When I reach my destination, I dig around for something non-alcoholic and not a Coke. I can't come over to get the exact same drink, can I?

"Hey." I look up and try not to smile. _He_ is standing in front of me.

I stand up straight with some orangey drink in my hand. "Hi."

"I'm Nate," he says.

"Lily," I say. He smiles. I smile back.

And then I notice his eyes. They are perhaps the prettiest eyes I've ever seen. They've got flecks of blues and greens swirling around.

He's still staring at me. I think he wants me to say something. "I've never seen you down here before. Is this your first summer visit?" It's the best I can come up with.

"Yeah, my mum heard this place is the best—"

"It is," I interrupt. I blush. Whoops, reflex.

Nate smiles. "That's what Sam"—he points to the bloke he was standing with—"and his mum said. Sam and I've been on the same football team for ten years, so my mum believed his mum, and here I am."

"So you play football?"

"Oh, yeah, it's really big at my school. Almost everyone plays…"

There's no football at Hogwarts, so I decide to just listen.

* * *

><p>Some indefinite time later, I'm still talking with Nate. We're sitting on one of the logs around the bonfire.<p>

I like talking to Nate, but I get the feeling that he's a bit cocky. And I've had enough cockiness from Potter to last a lifetime. Hopefully he's just trying to impress me.

He was easy to talk to, though, and our conversations jumped all over the place. I found out that Nate has played soccer almost his whole life, has a younger sister (the girl he was standing with earlier), lives in London because his dad owns a law firm, has two cats, loves the mountains and skiing, and his favorite season is winter.

Nate discovered that I don't play any sports, have an older sister named Petunia, live right outside London, have no pets (I'd sound like a freak if I told him I have an owl), have never been skiing or to the mountains, and that I love both the winter and summer.

Occasionally I'd look over and see Claire and Potter still talking. It wasn't even just Claire talking all the time; every other time I looked, Potter would be talking and Claire would be laughing so hard she'd hold onto Potter's shoulder for support. I have no idea what he could've entertained her with, since everything he usually says/does to get people to laugh is magic related.

Nate's telling me about a time he got suspended from school for three days for getting in a fight (I think he thinks the "bad boy" image will impress me), when I see Potter coming towards us.

I'm hoping he just wants to the fire to warm him up a bit, but my hopes die when he stops right behind our log.

"Evans," he says, "I'm leaving. I told my mum twelve thirty."

I wanted to point out that tons of people were still there, but then I remember I told my mum twelve thirty as well. Damn.

"Okay, I'll come with you," I reluctantly say while standing up. I turn back to Nate who stands up as well.

"Er…" There's an awkward silence with Potter standing behind us.

"Where's Claire?" I ask. A.K.A. = Could you leave, Potter?

He doesn't get the message. "She said she'll be right back. She has to leave as well, since she's got to get up early and work, so she's walking back with us." He doesn't move.

"Well," I say, "it was nice talking with you, Nate."

"You too, Lily," he smiles as he says it. I feel like I might start drooling.

I swear I hear Potter clear his throat.

"Er, I'll see you around?" I practically ask. Come on, you dolt! Ask to see me again!

"What house is yours? I'll come stop by. I won't be able to remember your phone number."

I have to prevent myself from grinning like a loon. "The blue one on Dudley Street, 5357."

"5357, Dudley," Nate repeats. "Great."

Potter definitely clears his throat this time. I look over at him and his arms are crossed and he looks really impatient.

"I better go," I say to Nate. I hope Potter is getting my anger vibes.

"I'll see you soon, yeah?"

I smile. "Definitely." Nate smiles back, and I leave with Potter.

"About bloody time," he complains.

I have the urge to start an argument with him, but I restrain myself. No reason to ruin a perfectly good night because of Potter. I pretend not to hear him.

We find Claire with Darcie and Katelyn. She sure is social.

"Lily!" Darcie exclaims when she sees me. She runs forward and gives me a hug. "How've you been? It feels like it's been ages! You look so good! Have you met Claire? I guess you have! What a small world after all! And who's this friend of yours? I saw him talking with Claire. Did you introduce him to Claire, or vice versa? She certainly didn't introduce him to me! Hi, I'm Darcie," she says, sticking her hand out. I always feel a headache coming on when I talk to her.

"James," Potter says and shakes her hand.

Darcie starts rambling to Potter, and I turn to Katelyn. "Hi, Katelyn."

"Hey! How's it going, Lily?" she asks.

I smile. "Good, what about you?"

"Great," she says. I eye a wedding ring on her finger. It's awfully pretty. "I'm happy to be back here."

"Oi, Evans, we're leaving!" Potter seemed to have escaped Darcie's incessant rambling far quicker than I've ever been able to and had walked away with Claire at his side.

"I better go," I tell Katelyn, although I wish I could have talked to her longer. "It was good seeing you!" I give her a brief hug and then jog to catch up with Claire and Potter.

"I can't believe I invited you to this and didn't even get a chance to talk to you, Lily!" Claire says as we walk side-by-side. "Who were you talking with, anyway?"

"Nate," I reply.

"He was cute," Claire says. She giggles.

No need to tell me twice! I giggle as well. "He was."

"What did you guys talk about?"

I summarize our conversation, but I can't help notice that Potter is really quiet. As in he's not making any obnoxious comments like usual. He's probably trying to impress Claire.

We quickly reach the street Claire has to turn down to get back to her restaurant/house.

"You're okay to walk back by yourself?" I ask.

Claire waves my worries off. "'Course. It's, like, a two minute walk. But we should do something soon!" She looks meaningful at James. "The three of us."

"Sure," replies James. He smiles at Claire.

"Bye, Lily!" She gives me a hug. "Bye, James," she girlishly says. She gives him a quick hug and then starts walking down another street.

"Bye!" I say.

Potter and I walk down the road. Neither one of us says anything.

"So what'd you think of Claire?" I ask, hoping to start a conversation.

"She's great," he tersely says. I'm a little shocked at his tone of voice. I mean, what got his knickers in a knot?

One moment I'm pondering what could be wrong with him, and then the next, "Are you cross with me?" is tumbling out of my mouth.

"Why would I be cross with you?" His voice is flat, but he still sounds a tad rude.

I think about what we had discussed earlier: Katelyn and making mistakes and blunders defining people. I wonder if that's what's bothering him, but (thankfully) that doesn't spill from my mouth.

"I don't know," I say, getting a bit annoyed. He didn't even answer the question! A feeble attempt at some humor and charm causes me to say, "You know I've been telling you since first year I can't understand how that gigantic brain of yours works!"

I totally expect him to crack. He's a sucker for compliments, especially from me. Not that I ever give them to him, but any civil thing I say he'll twist into a compliment.

He doesn't smile.

I don't even think he blinked.

This is unnatural. A quiet James Potter around me? It's unthinkable. Unimaginable. Deplorable! Maybe that's why I did something totally crazy.

I tried to cheer him up.

"Oh, come on," I say and nudge him in the side. "Cheer up! I bet McGonagall hasn't stopped thinking about you once since term's been over! She's probably writing you a love letter now!"

McGonagall hates Potter and his friends. I pray he finds this ironic statement funny.

Potter's upper lip starts to twitch. Yes!

"I bet it would go something like this:,"—I make myself sound strict and (hopefully) McGonagall-like—"'Dear Mr. Potter, I'm pleased to inform you that I'm counting down the days until I'll see you again. I have terribly missed yelling at you every day. I hope you haven't been pranking other women. You know how jealous I get when you fill other women's classrooms with cat toys. Make sure to—"

I'm interrupted by Potter's laughing.

Huzzah! It worked! Let it be known to the world that I, Lily Evans, successfully pulled James Potter out of a bad mood. I feel like I should become Minister for Magic now.

"You're so weird, Evans."

Oh.

"Don't get me started, Potter," I say jokingly.

We reach Dudley Street, and I turn to the black haired boy beside me when we stop in front of his house.

"Good-bye," I say.

"See you, Evans," he says. He gives me a crooked grin and then heads into his house. I walk to my house.

The lights are off and my parents are sleeping, so I silently go inside and lock the door.

Before I go to bed, I play the whole evening over in my head.

For some reason, my brain keeps coming back to Potter saying that mistakes show how a person was. Eventually, my brain shuts up and I fall asleep.

* * *

><p><strong>I've actually seen a Dudley road before, and I just wanted to show that Petunia (although she is not here yet) has as much of a connection to their house as Lily does. And now...we're officially met another OC, Nate. All the other OCs they were talking about won't be too important in this story.<strong>

**Oh, who am I kidding. They'll hardly show up again. Claire and Nate on the other hand...**

**Do you want them to stay, or do you just want them to hurry up and get the hell out of the story? Did James really think Muggles were crazy and that he's different?**

**Until next week,**

**MG**


	5. Town Tales and Dates

**Hopefully it wasn't too long of a wait, but here's the next chapter! **

**Reviewers: El Leon Y La Oveja, Roseflower94, yellow 14, [blank], Luannie, NegligibleNaina, crazymacky, Shhayy-j11, PenNameless1994, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, Eleos, Tyem Marodyor, Straight up Marauder, and valenari, you all are amazing. **

**I've also discovered I suck at coming up with chapter titles. Just ignore their badness.**

* * *

><p>A couple days after the bonfire, Claire and I are in my room discussing what to do for the day.<p>

The morning after the party, I had gone down to find Claire at her restaurant. She told me that she was taking her younger siblings to the beach again that afternoon, and asked me if I cared to join them. Of course, I said yes.

Claire and I mostly sat on the beach under the sun while Tommy and Claudia played in the water and made sand castles. My first impression of Claire was one hundred percent accurate: She's super friendly and social.

Claire did a lot of talking that day on the beach, and I will admit I was getting slightly tired of hearing her voice. But when she turned to me and said, "Now tell me about your life," she was totally enraptured the entire time I talked. It was kind of nice, actually.

So when she showed up at my house this morning, I was pleasantly surprised. Thankfully, I had put away all of the Hogwarts textbooks and supplies I brought with me as soon as I got here. The main reason was because Petunia hated seeing them, but also because summer was the time I could escape it all. Except for my _Daily Prophet_ subscriptions, it is as if the wizarding world does not exist. Well, it _was_ that way. With the Potters staying just across the street now, I'm constantly aware of my second world.

A third, and very obvious, reason of why I hide my stuff is for moments like these.

Claire is lying across my bed on her stomach, looking at all the books on my white bookshelf, and I quickly do a scan of my room to make sure that there isn't anything lying about. There isn't.

The summer before my fifth year at Hogwarts, I brought Abigail upstairs to my room while I grabbed something, and I had accidentally left my wand out on my desk. I had to scream that I saw a huge spider on the opposite wall, so that when she started freaking out, I dived across the bed, grabbed my wand, and hid it in my underwear drawer.

I can perform magic outside of school now, so if I want to, I'll just put an Undetectable Extension Charm on my pockets, and stick my wand in one of them. I used to have to carry some sort of bag, or just leave it at home. Lately, I haven't really wanted to leave my wand at home if I'm going out by myself. The bonfire was one thing, because I knew Potter would be there, but I still like to keep my wand on my person.

Clarence, my owl, is a totally different story. Naturally, I let him out to stretch his wings, hunt, and send letters, but he can't be constantly flying to and from my house. The neighbors would definitely notice. Occasionally I am forced to leave him in his cage during the day. I would stick him in our guest bedroom, shut the door, and pray that no one heard him. Usually no one did. Like with hiding my wand, I can use magic now to make things easier on my Muggleborn self. I usually cast charms so that no one else will hear Clarence. Merlin, I completely adore the fact that I can do magic during the summer now.

At this moment right now, though, Clarence hasn't returned from Marlene's.

"What do you want to do today?" I ask Claire. Not that I don't like hanging out with her, but sometimes having Muggles in my room makes me paranoid. It feels like any second they'll see something of mine, discover I'm a witch, and then storm out of my house calling me a freak and vowing to never speak to me again. Even though my room looks like any regular room. I've got the rose-colored sheets on my bed, a white desk with junk on top and a vanity mirror hanging over it, a white dresser, a closet, a bookshelf, and my balcony. Nothing unusual. I'm just a completely average girl.

Completely.

"Dunno," Claire responds lazily. She sits up, turns to face me, and crosses her legs. "We could…Nah."

"What?" I ask. I can tell she wants me to ask her from the way she said it.

"Wellllll," she draws out the word, "I was just thinking we could go see if James wants to hang out. Since you guys are friends and all."

Good grief. Is she serious? Sorry, but I _do not_ want to hang out with Potter!

"Er," I say, trying to figure out how to say this, "we _could_. Or we could do something with just the two of us!"

Claire makes a pouty face. "Okay…"

Oh my god. She isn't mad at me now, is she?

"Can I ask you a question?" Claire says. She sounds sad. And scared. And anxious. I almost have the urge to say no, because I feel like this won't turn out good at all.

"Sure."

"Do you…like James? In _that_ way?"

I promise I almost let out a round of hysterical laughter at her question. Me? Like Potter? If she only knew! If Claire had seen us at school the past six years, she would never in her right mind ask that question. But because she doesn't go to school with us, I cut her some slack and try and answer as seriously and nicely as possible.

"No."

"No?"

"No."

Claire's face immediately brightens. A smile appears on her whole face, and it makes her eyes look like they're sparkling. I guess she was really worried about this.

She hops off my bed and goes to sit down in front of my antique vanity mirror. As she starts rummaging through my jewelry, she says, "I didn't think so. You aren't really his type anyway."

My jaw drops when she says this. She says it quite snottily, and I'm more than a bit surprised. What does she mean I'm not his type? Of course I'm not his type, but I could be if I wanted to! She doesn't even know what his type is! I will tell you what his type is: the girl who thinks he is the epitome of hot and talented, wants to snog in empty classrooms, and is unwilling to see past his looks to his atrocious personality. _That_ is Potter's type. And occasionally she will be a bit dim, but not always. They aren't always slaggish or mean. Unfortunately, I have seen a couple of my friends go on a date with Potter.

It was the way Claire said it that made my stomach clench. It was almost like…she was challenging me. Maybe after all these years I am finally going barking, but I could detect a dare in her tone. Normally I'm not one to ever back down from a challenge. Academic, personal, whatever it is, I usually take it. But competing _for_ Potter? That's where I draw the line. Competing with Potter? I always do that; that's nothing new. Competing for Potter is in a very different realm, though, and, frankly, it is not something I would ever want to get involved with. So to heck with my pride, I'm just going to agree with her. If I don't, then she'll think I actually want Potter.

"Yeah, you're right. He's totally not my type." I couldn't help it. I know I was supposed to be agreeable, but am I really just supposed to stand there and tell her that I'm not Potter's type? No. That's why I slyly put some emphasis on the fact that _he_ is not _my_ type.

She doesn't catch my implication. Or she chooses to ignore it. All she says is, "Great! So you don't mind if we go get him and see if he wants to do something with us?"

Uh, yes, I would mind actually.

"No, not at all." Merlin, I'm weak.

"Great!" Claire says again. I'm starting to dislike this word.

Claire walks out of my room and down the stairs. Mum and Dad are out, so I leave a quick note saying I went out with Claire and James and that I would be back soon.

Once we walk out onto my porch, I follow the head of shiny brown hair marching towards the temporary Potter house. She looks like a woman on a mission.

We reach the yellow house much quicker than I would like, and Claire pushes the button for the doorbell. I faintly hear the chiming inside the building. I expect Claire to confidently ask for Potter, invite him to hang out with us, and that is that. It turns out that that assumption is extremely wrong.

After Claire rings the doorbell, she steps back and pushes me forward. I turn around and face her. "What are you-?" The door opens.

"Hello, Lily!" It's Mrs. Potter. I don't know if I would've preferred it to be this way, or would've rather had Potter answer the door.

"Hi, Mrs. Potter," I awkwardly say. "I, that is, _we_ were wondering if James was home. And if he could go to town with us." I motion towards Claire. She steps forward and shyly waves to Mrs. Potter.

Mrs. Potter looks at Claire for a moment before smiling in return. "Hello, dear. Who are you?"

"I'm Claire, and I live in town with my family. I'm a friend of Lily's, and she wanted to hang out with James."

ME? Did she just say that _I_ wanted to hang out with James? Why that little…

Mrs. Potter gives me a meaningful look that I greatly dislike. "I'll go get him. Come on in."

Once we're standing in their house and Mrs. Potter leaves, I turn on Claire. "Why did you say that I wanted to hang out with James? You were the one that asked if we could get him!"

She looks awfully embarrassed. "I'm sorry! It just came out!"

I continue to glare at her. "Please don't be mad at me…" she practically begs.

I sigh. "Okay, but if James asks, YOU were the one who wanted to get him, understand?" Claire wildly nods her head, and I see James coming down the hall. My first thought is that he must have been sleeping because he has awful hair, but then I remember that it always looks like that. I fight the urge to giggle.

"Hey," Potter says when he reaches us. "What are you guys doing here?"

I give Claire a meaningful look. "I was over at Lily's house, and thought it would be nice to see if you wanted to do something with us," she says while flirtingly smiling at him.

Potter smiles. "Yeah. I've been meaning to get out of the house. I've been staring at the wall practically all day."

Claire laughs. It wasn't that funny. Potter runs his fingers through his hair. I feel the urge to slap his hand out of his already-mussed-up hair.

I stand there as Potter and Claire smile at each other. Seriously, I did not sign up for this.

"Are we going to go or what?" Potter looks at me after I say this. His expression immediately changes from the look he was giving Claire. He has a…odd expression clouding his normally relaxed face.

"Yep!" Claire enthusiastically says. Potter goes to tell his parents he'll be back soon, and we walk out the front door and start heading towards town.

"Your mom is sooo nice," Claire gushes to Potter.

"Yeah?" he says.

"Yes! She looks just like you. And I bet she's as sweet as you are, too!"

This girl is very, very clueless. Potter seems to think so as well, for he says, "Me, sweet? Nah, I'm not that sweet."

"Yes you are!" Claire counters.

Oh, gosh.

"No, I'm not," Potter says, a bit rudely. "I've actually gotten approximately one hundred and thirteen detentions at my school. Half of them are from bullying other kids."

"Oh." Claire looks hurt. In fact, she looks really hurt. She sticks her lower lip out, barely a centimeter, but it's noticeable, and she walks with less spring in her step. It's all a bit dramatic, but I can imagine that she is truly upset.

Claire is walking between Potter and I, but I lean behind her to glare at Potter. He sees me looking at him, and I'm surprised to see that he looks guilty.

"But I'm quite glad that you think I'm sweet. You're probably one of the only people that do." Potter puts his arm around Claire's shoulder for a second, long enough for her to look up at him, and he grins. She giggles again and blushes.

"Unless you're actually really bad," Claire says, "then I wouldn't want to hang out with you. You could be a bad influence on me."

"A bad influence, eh?" Potter replies. "Well I don't know about that…"

Claire giggles _again_. I'm ready for this conversation to be over.

"So, Claire, what were you saying about the old man that came into your restaurant yesterday?"

"Oh, yeah!" She turns to Potter. "It was the weirdest thing ever. This old man sits down and my mum tells me to go serve him. I ask him what he wants and he just starts yelling at me that he wants his chicken! So I say…"

* * *

><p>I'm almost scared to admit this out loud. But it's true, so I might as well just say it: I actually had fun today with Claire and James. After the little incident in the beginning, the two didn't incessantly flirt or talk to just each other. The three of us walked through town, stopping once to get a snack at Claire's restaurant, exchanging stories on embarrassing moments, barmy people we have met, and memories we will never forget.<p>

Claire had talked the most, but mainly because she could say the most. She has moved a couple times because her parents kept trying to find somewhere to settle down and start a business, so she's been to all sorts of places and met all kinds of people.

If James could say whatever he wanted without having to worry about freaking Claire out and exposing a whole new world, then I bet twenty Galleons he would have had the best stories to tell. Of course he would occasionally tell a story on a prank he pulled or a prat he met, but he had to alternate it so there was no magic in the story. I knew this because half the time I'd been there for his stories, and the way he said it wasn't exactly the way it happened.

This obviously led to James shining himself in a better light, but I wasn't going to be the one to call him out on it. I did not care anyway.

I was surprised at how good he was getting at fibbing, though, to "Muggle-proof" his stories. He once accidentally mentioned Quidditch, but I told Claire it was some made-up game the blokes at my school played. We quickly changed the topic then.

Most of the things I talked about revolved around my summers. Occasionally I would talk about a time on Christmas or Easter break in my Muggle neighborhood, but it was mostly about my summers.

I had expected the afternoon to drag on and feel like it would never end, but that wasn't the case. Before I knew it, the three of us are walking down Corinthias street when Claire tells us she has to start heading home.

"You sure you can't stay a bit longer?" I ask.

"I wish," Claire says, "but I told my mum and dad I would be back"—she looks at her watch—"forty-five minutes ago." She sticks her tongue out and makes a face.

I laugh. "Okay, we'll do something soon again, yeah?"

"Yep," she says. She looks at James. "You, too, James."

James smiles. "Lil' ol' me?" he says in a prissy voice.

Claire laughs. "Yes, lil' ol' you!" She looks at her watch again. "Now I've really got to go! Bye!" She hugs me, then James, and then starts jogging down the street.

James and I watch her go and then start walking towards our houses again, similar to the night of the bonfire. Except this time, James isn't acting very sullen. He actually seems to be in a good mood. We eventually pass his house, but he keeps on walking by to mine with me.

"I commend you, Lily," he says, "This Muggle thing isn't as easy as I thought."

"I've just had lots of practice, that's why I can make it look so effortless. Like all the things I do," I tease.

"Ha, ha," James says. "Speaking of—"

"Nate?"

I see Nate walking towards James and me from the general direction of my house. Did he stop by to see me?

He had not stopped by since the bonfire. I figured he was just busy or something. I totally wasn't obsessively asking my mum if anyone stopped by, though. Nope, not at all. That's what loony people do, and I am not loony.

"Lily, hey!" Nate jogs so he's standing in front of James and me. I take a peek at him. Yep, still attractive.

I glance down at my shirt to make sure I don't have any stains or anything. Thankfully, I don't. "What are you doing here?" I inquire. Please say coming to see you, please say coming to see you, please say coming to see you.

"I came to see you." YES! "Your mum said you were out, but that I could sit on the porch and wait for you, but you never showed up, so I started to leave. But then I saw you over here."

"Oh, yeah, I just went out with Claire. I don't remember if you met Claire the other night…"

Nate shakes his head. "No, but I know who she is."

"And James as well." I gesture towards James.

Nate looks at James with a blank expression on his face and says, "Hi." He doesn't even bother to wait for a response from James before he turns back to me and begins talking again. "Listen, sorry I didn't come over and see you sooner, but I couldn't get a chance to get away. I actually had a question for you. Would you want to go out for lunch with me tomorrow, say…two o'clock?"

SUCCESS! "Sure, that'd be great."

Nate smiles. "Good."

"Good," I repeat.

We just stand there smiling. Suddenly, I remember that James is standing next to me. "Oh! James, you—"

I turn to look beside me at James, but no one is there. I turn around and I see James walking down the street towards his house. "James!" I yell, but he can't hear me. Or he ignores me.

I don't want to sound conceited or anything, but James has never ignored me when I call for him. Never. It's a bit unnerving, actually, for him to be doing it now. And annoying. I feel irritated that he would just walk away from me without saying good-bye. There I was, actually thinking we could be friends after having a good time out together, and he just walks away without saying anything.

"JAMES!" He's definitely ignoring me now. That stupid git!

I turn back to Nate. Forget James. If he's going to be a baby and ignore me because someone else wants to talk to me, then I'll treat him like a baby.

"Where do you want to meet up tomorrow?" I ask Nate.

"I'll come by your house and then we can walk into town, yeah?"

"Yeah," I say.

"Good," Nate says. My stomach fills with butterflies at that one word.

"Good."

* * *

><p>Mum and I are sitting at the dinner table eating grilled chicken. Since my dad's an engineer, he can't really get long breaks away from work. He's always driving from the beach house to his work office. It is not a dreadfully long drive, but he is still away quite a bit.<p>

"So how did it go with Claire and James today, Lily?" Mum asks. We were having a bit of an awkward silence. Mum and I usually never have an awkward silence, but…

"Good," I say. And since my dad isn't here… "I've got a date tomorrow!" I excitedly add.

My mum's taking a sip of her iced tea when I say it, but I can see her eyes get wide. "What? He asked you today?" she asks when she sets her glass down again.

"Yep! When I was coming back from town!"

"Lily, that's great! I'm sure James is very excited you said yes to him. Ella and I said it would only be a matter of time. Are you guys going to do a wizard thing or-?"

"Whoa, whoa, WHAT?"

Mum cocks her head to the side and looks at me. "What?"

"Did you just say that you and Mrs. Potter knew JAMES was going to ask me out? And that I would say YES?"

She's barking! And what does that mean, anyway? Do she and Mrs. Potter just sit around and gossip about their teenage children and how because they are friends, their kids have to get married or something?

"Well, yes," Mum says. "Isn't James your date tomorrow?" She looks genuinely perplexed.

"Er, no, Mum. If I was going on a date with James, you would see a pig flying by your window or something."

"But…I thought James liked you?"

"He does. Did. Pretended he did." I sigh out of frustration. "James never really liked me. He just liked…the idea of me."

"That doesn't sound like James…"

I quickly finishing chewing my asparagus so that I can explain the real James, and then we can move on to the topic of Nate.

"Maybe not this James, but the James at school is completely different. All the girls like him or his best friend Sirius, except maybe me and Marlene. But Marlene already went to Hogsmeade with Sirius in our fourth year, so she doesn't count. But it totally turned into a disaster. I mean—the drama!" I'm rambling now. Stop rambling!

"Anyway, James just wanted me to go out with him so that he could say I went out with him. He doesn't actually like _me_. In fact, he doesn't even _know_ me."

My mum doesn't look convinced. "I don't know, Lily…Ella said James has been very fond of you for some time."

I doubt it. "How would she know?" It sounds discourteous, but honestly, how _would_ she know?

"You would be surprised at what a mother overhears. Especially when a certain mother has her son and his three friends over all the time."

"Is that what Mrs. Potter said?"

Mum has a sneaky smile on her face and just shrugs her shoulders. I guess that means our conversation is over.

"Anyway, my date's not with James. It is with Nate. I met him at that party almost a week ago."

"Was he the one who stopped by to see you today?"

"Yes!" Now Mum will see that Nate is actually even better than James, she'll give me her blessing, and I'll live happily ever after!

"I didn't like him," my mum brusquely says. She shakes her head for emphasis and some pieces of her red-grey hair fall out of her ponytail.

"What? Why?" How could she not like him?

"He just seemed...off to me," Mum says.

Wha-?

"I like James better," she muses. I lightly gasp. Did she seriously just tell me that she likes JAMES POTTER more than NATE TURNER—the boy I have a DATE with TOMORROW?

"Well _I_ like Nate," I say, stressing the 'I'.

My mum nods. "Good. Be with whoever makes you happy, sweetie."

I nod back to her. "I will. So when's Petunia coming up?"

We talk about Petunia, Dad, the rest of the summer, and everything in between. We don't talk about Nate, James, or the Potters.

As soon as dinner is over and I've cleared the table, I go upstairs to write a letter back to Marlene (Clarence returned this afternoon) and find an outfit for tomorrow.

* * *

><p><strong>This almost fills like a filler chapter, which sucks, because filler chapters suchk. But did anyone notice the different between Lily and James at the end?<strong>

**So quite a bit of you all liked Claire/Nate and James/Lily. Claire and Nate are (obviously) going to be back for at LEAST two more chapters. All depending on how it goes. Readers, how do you want Lily's date with James to go? Terrible, fantastic? I already have an idea and it's partly written, but I want to hear what you think. **

**Also, sorry if this chapters a bit different, but I'm stuck. I decided to do that Word spelling and grammar check that tells you what grade level you're writing at, and I'm averaging 3.5 here, guys. 3.5 That's AWFUL. I don't know whether to try and change my format of writing (which is an even worse thing to do halfway through a story) or to just bear with it. **

**Does it seem like my writing's is weak and for little kids, or can you not tell at all? Do you like the way I currently write, or would changing it up not be a bad idea? Lemme know, please!**

**Thanks, **

**MG**


	6. James to the Rescue

**Sorry for the long wait and the possible not-up-to-par editing. It was homecoming week, and between the themes, dance, game and school...Well, the point is that it's here now!**

**adriana-xx, Tyem Marodyor, SpencerReidFan89, El Leon Y La Oveja, [blank], Luannie, Mary Olivia, ListenToYourFriends, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, PenguinBoxers, Heimarmene, PenNameless1994, Almost Genius, Roseflower94, yellow 14, ladyoftimeandangels, Rani Jashalithie, crazymacky, softasthunder, and Eleos, your reviews are much appreciated. :)**

**And thanks to everyone who commented on my writing style. I've decided not to change a single thing. ;)**

**Props to SpencerReidFan89 and ListenToYourFriends for prediciting/hoping exactly how this chapter is going to go. **

**Hopefuls for a Good Date: 3**

**Hopefuls for a Bad Date:** **4**

**:)**

* * *

><p>This date is not good. In fact, it's bloody awful!<p>

I've just never been out with someone who's so _boring_. When I first met Nate, I thought he was easy to talk to and that we could talk for hours. It turns out that I was wrong. I was horribly, disastrously wrong.

It's not like Nate doesn't have anything to talk about. Because, trust me, he does. He has plenty to talk about. And it's all about himself.

And I thought James was arrogant! At least James would slyly show off.

Okay, so catching a Snitch and ruffling his hair and smirking at girls to let them know how attractive he is isn't very sly, but at least he never talked for an hour about how he did in a sports game a MONTH after the game.

James would give play-by-play recaps of Quidditch games, but those were usually at the parties after a Gryffindor victory, and people didn't _mind_ hearing about it. I'll admit, once or twice I would casually eavesdrop to hear him talk about the game. He talked with such passion and enthusiasm; it was hard _not_ to listen. Unlike Nate, James would compliment his teammates as well. You could hear him say, "And so Cabot was flying through the air with the Quaffle in his hand, when all of a sudden MacNair hits a Bludger at him from ten feet away. I don't know how he did it, but Cabot did a cartwheel in the air to avoid the Bludger! And the Quaffle didn't even shift in his grip! It was spectacular I tell you! I've never seen a third year do something as amazing as that!"

Of course, James would then talk about how Ethan Cabot threw the Quaffle to him and he did some sort of double fake out to score, but at least he had the decency to compliment his teammates.

As Captain and star Chaser, it was expected for James to be proud of his team. But it wasn't just because of his duties that he acted the way he did. James honestly cared for his team, even outside of the Quidditch pitch. He had even tutored Alexander Whitam in Transfiguration for weeks so that Alex could come to all the practices.

If someone asked me back in school to name one positive characteristic about James, it would have been that when someone was his friend or teammate, he cared a great deal about him or her.

It seems that Nate doesn't have this particular quality.

When he came by this morning, I was excited for what was supposed to be a wonderful afternoon. I had gotten up early this morning and successfully made myself look nice. When two o'clock rolled around, I had no worries.

The moment I stepped out the door with Nate, though, that changed.

I couldn't think of anything to talk about. It was like my mind decided to go on vacation or something. I don't know about him, but he wasn't saying anything either.

"Hi," I had said when he opened the door.

"Hey," Nate had said. "Ready to go?"

"Yep," I had said. And then we started down the road in silence.

"Sooo," I had said, trying to fill the silence, but Nate hadn't contributed anything. He seemed to feel that the conversation was as awkward as I did. "How long did you say you were staying here?"

"Three and a half more weeks," Nate had replied.

"Oh, cool." There was another silence.

"How long are you staying for?"

"Until the last weekend of August."

"Wow, that's a long time," Nate had said.

"Yeah, but I like it here, so it's okay," I responded.

"Cool."

And then there had been another silence. It seemed as if we had talked about everything basic that night at the bonfire, and there wasn't anything exciting to talk about now. We had walked all the way into town when Nate finally spoke again.

"Where would you like to go eat?"

I suggested Claire's restaurant in the hopes that she may be there and I could have someone to talk to, even just for a moment. Nate nodded, and we quietly walked on.

We had reached the restaurant and were seated by Claire's mum, who I met a few days ago. I didn't see Claire anywhere, and was forced to stop casually looking for her to focus on Nate. He had decided to start a conversation again…about himself.

Right now, he is talking about _another_ football game. Unlike James, the only thing he talks about is what he did, what he thought, and how he won the game.

"I'm running down the field with the ball, right, and I cross it to the left to one of my teammates," Nate says. "It's a spectacular kick, I tell you. You should've been there. So he dribbles down the field a bit, but he loses the ball. (He really wasn't very good.) Now the other team's forward has the ball and he's going towards our net, but I cut him off. He tries to fake me out and go around me but BAM! I take the ball from him, shoot off towards their goal, fake out three people—two Cruyffs and a Nutmeg—and then I kick the ball into the upper right corner of the goals. The goalie tried to save it, but I was just too fast. So I earned my team a third point, AFTER the first two I scored."

Yes, yes, your Cruyffs and Nutmegs are magnificent, whatever the hell they are. Can we talk about something else?

"Wow, sounds great. Nate, have you ever-?" I try to change the conversation for the FOURTH TIME since we've sat down.

I don't know what I was going to ask him, but it was not related to football in any possible way.

He ignores my attempt at a different topic. Surprise, surprise.

"Then they had the kickoff, and they just chucked it at our goal! Whoosh! Our goalie, Philippe, saved it, and punted it towards me. It was too bloody high, though. How hard is it to punt a ball? It's not that hard! Luckily for Philippe I jumped up and headed it, with a simple flick towards my other forward, Derek…"

All I can think about right now is how I'll have to go home and send a letter about Nate to Marlene. I start to compose the letter in my mind, because, frankly, I want to drown myself in my soda right about now.

I look around the room, and I see James. James!

He just entered the restaurant with his mum and dad. A gangly teenage boy leads them to a table across the room to my right. I try and catch James's eye, but he's watching his mum and dad walk in front of them. Mr. Potter has his arm around his wife, but then pulls it away to get out his handkerchief to cover his cough. James's attention is drawn to his dad, and he's soon seated across from his parents.

I pick up my napkin and pretend to wipe my mouth, but I'm really just covering up my mouth so I can covertly try to capture Potter's attention. He's engrossed in his menu and not looking my way at all. What is this? At Hogwarts he practically had a Lily-radar!

Desperate times call for desperate measures. I reach forward for the salt without a real reason for it. In reaching for the salt, my elbow "accidentally" knocks into my almost empty drink. It falls onto the floor with a _thud_! Luckily, it's one of those cups that are plastic but look like glass.

"Oh!" I exclaim. A couple people look over to see what the commotion was, but upon seeing my cup on the floor, they turn back to their meal. One of the people who turn towards me is James. Once he sees me, he raises an eyebrow. I get off my chair and bend down to pick up my drink, and a waiter comes by with a towel. As I'm leaning down cleaning up my soda, I mouth, "Save me!" to James.

His face is full of confusion. He mouths, "What?"

"Save me!" I repeat. Then I point a finger at Nate under the table and make a face. For extra affect, I make a slashing movement over my throat and pretend to die. I'm being a bit dramatic, but when you've sat with someone who's only talked about how great he is, you would be doing the same thing.

James finally understands, but the git thoughtfully rubs his chin. Even from here I can see the mischievous look in his eyes.

I put my hands together in a begging form and mouth, "Please!" Here I am, practically on my hands and knees, and James is refusing to help me. How dare him.

Nate bows down as well. The waiter had left a few moments ago with my cup, the ice and the wet towel, and I am still under the table. Whoops.

"Uh, what are you doing?" Nate asks.

"Nothing, nothing!" I say, all flustered. I sit in my chair. Out of the corner of my eye, I see James snickering. Why that little…

I stand up. "Could you excuse me for a moment? I have to use the restroom."

Nate looks a little irked, but I could care less right now. "I suppose."

I head towards the loo and cast a meaningful glance towards the Potter table.

I'm standing outside the door to the girls' bathroom, when James comes around the corner.

"What's up, Evans? I never knew you to be the type to snog a bloke in a bathroom while on a date with another bloke." He acts shocked. "But I must admit it's turning me on a bit…"

I ignore him.

"I'm begging you, Potter. This date is awful. Just come up and tell him you saw my mum, and she said that if you saw me, she needed me home at once."

James pretends to be deep in thought. "Hmm…"

"Please, I'm begging you!"

"What do I get out of it?" he asks.

"Whatever you want," I tell him.

"Anything?"

"Uh…no. But I'll owe you one! Next time you need me to do you a favor, I'm yours!" Come on, he has to accept!

"Fine. But the way you've treated me in the past, I should let you suffer!"

I'm astounded. "The way _I _treated you? Due to the way you've treated me, you should be kissing my feet and thanking me for even speaking to you!"

"Kissing you, eh? All right." James leans in with his lips significantly puckered. He looks like a frog. He's leaning in so close to me, my eyes cross as I try and keep his lips in view.

"No!" I whisper-shriek. I gently slap his cheek away.

"All right, all right. Merlin, there was no need to hit me so hard!" He rubs his cheek.

What a baby. "Would you focus, please?" I hiss. "I'm going back out. Two minutes afterwards, come and say what I told you to. Okay?"

James solemnly nods. "Okay."

I nod back and turn towards my table. I can see the impatience radiating from Nate even before I sit down.

"Sorry about that," I lie as I take my seat.

"No problem," Nate answers. "But as I was saying, the defender elbows me in the side in his attempt to get the ball! So, obviously, I respond by kicking the guy in his ankles. He was trying to mess with me, and he couldn't just get away with it! Then the stupid referee calls a foul on _me_! Can you believe that?"

Yes. Yes I can.

He doesn't wait for my response. "They get a penalty kick because of that dumb referee. Fortunately, they—"

"Lily! I can't believe I found you!"

I have never been happier to see those glasses on that face in my life.

"James! What's wrong?"

"I was leaving to come out to eat with my parents"—he gesticulates to his parents who are curiously watching us—"and I ran into your mum. She asked that if I saw you in town, could I tell you she needs you home as soon as possible. I don't know what for, but she sounded pretty frazzled…Almost as if it was an emergency…" James trails off and nervously rubs his neck.

This boy deserves an acting award.

"Really?" I ask, resisting the smile that's threatening to creep up on my face. I turn to Nate. "I'm so sorry, but would you mind if we ended this a little early? I must check on my mum."

There's no doubt about it now: Nate's annoyed. "Yeah, sure," he says gruffly. He stares at James as he says, "_I_'ll walk you home."

James evenly stares back. Neither one blinks. Are they—Are they having some sort of male testosterone competition? Oh, Merlin. I can't handle this.

"Thanks for telling me, James." I smile at him.

"No problem," he smoothly replies, and then walks away.

Nate flags down our waiter, and asks for the check. If it was anyone else, I'd offer to pay for my half (even if I didn't really want to). But…it's Nate, so I don't.

He pays (and leaves a pretty lousy tip, might I add, so I add a bit more when he's not looking), and then we're heading out the door. Nate has his hand on the small of my back, leading us out. I take a quick turn around and make eye contact with James. I smile and mouth, "Thank you." He tousles his hair and smiles in return.

Unsurprisingly, Nate starts talking about himself again. Surprisingly, it's not about football.

Rudely enough, he starts talking about how the girls at his school are all over him these days. I'm resisting the urge to roll my eyes. Now, it might just be my own arrogance, but I feel like the only reason he changed from his football skills to his charm over girls is because of James. I think he thinks James is his competition.

Ha, as if!

Any one of the Gryffindor boys in my year could beat Nate at this point, and that's saying something. At least they can have some fun. Nate just wanted to talk, talk, talk about himself.

I tune him out the whole walk home.

* * *

><p>Fire alarms are going off in my head. All I can hear is "DANGER! DANGER!"<p>

Oh, and Nate talking.

"I had a really fun time today, Lily," he says. He's leaning in closer and closer. I know what's coming, and that's why the danger alerts are going off in my mind.

"Mm-hmm," I respond. I can't even bring myself to lie and say yes.

Nate's tilting himself closer. I can see every fleck of color in his eyes, and I don't like it one bit. His eyes are closing and his lips are jutting out just a bit, and before I know it, I'm automatically turning my head and his lips are connecting with my cheek.

"Wha-?" He opens up his eyes and dazedly looks at me.

I kiss his own cheek as to not hurt his feelings too badly and say, "Good-bye, Nate." I open up my door, step inside, and shut it before he has a chance to say anything else.

I breathe a sigh of relief.

"Lily? Is that you?"

"Yes, Mum!"

Mum's the only one in the house since Dad's at work.

She comes bustling out of the living room and curiously looks at me. "Why—Why I didn't expect you to be home for another hour or two!"

I groan. "I know, but the whole thing was so dreadful I made him bring me home early."

"Really?" Mum's eyebrows skyrocket. "Want to tell me all about it while we walk on the beach?"

I enthusiastically nod. I love walking with my mum on the beach. "Lemme just change first," I call out, darting up the stairs.

* * *

><p>"So I convinced James to lie for me. "<p>

Mum gives me a reprimanding look.

"I know, I know. It's bad, but not as bad as Nate was! Anyway, once I sat back down, James came up and told me that you were looking for me and that it seemed serious. He was one good actor, too, Mum," I say.

Mum laughs. "And then you came home?"

"No, then James and Nate had this staring showdown thing. Then James went back to his parents, and Nate and I left. He talked about how all these girls fawn over him at his old school." I wrinkle my nose.

Mum laughs again. "Sounds like a case of jealousy to me!"

"Whatever it was, I better not see more any of it or him again!"

"You don't have to if you don't want to, dear."

I feel instantly relaxed at her words. She's right. I _don't_ have to see Nate again. Well, I might if I plan on telling him I don't want to see him anymore, but I'll cross that bridge when I get there.

Mum and I keep walking for a bit, the waves occasionally pulling forward and splashing our ankles.

"Lily?"

"Yeah?"

"I was cleaning up a bit in your room earlier."

Her tone has me nervous all of a sudden. Did she read my diary or something? Wait, I don't have a diary. Diaries are dumb. But then why does she sound like this is going to take a lot of effort for her to say?

"Yeah?"

"I saw your newspaper on your desk," she says.

Why does that sound like a bad thing? It's just the paper. It doesn't say—Oh. Oh, no. Shite. Shite. Shite.

I don't say anything. Maybe this isn't going where I think it is.

"I wasn't snooping, but I saw something move. You know how those pictures fascinate me, with their moving and talking people. So I went to go see what the picture was off, and in doing so I saw the headline."

Nope, this is going exactly where I fear it is going.

"It said something about…Death Eaters. And He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. And…deaths."

I still don't say anything. What can I say?

"Lily, look at me. What's going on?"

I look into her eyes, and I know that I won't be able to prevent myself from telling her the truth. No matter how badly I want to keep it a secret, I have to tell her.

"Mum, do you…do you want to sit down?"

She looks around. "I am getting a bit tired."

She was tired. We had only been walking for a little over five minutes. And she was tired. This is why I didn't want to tell her. She has too much on her plate already.

We move away from the water and sit on the ground. I immediately bury my toes in the sand. For some odd reason, the action gives me a bit of strength.

"First, Mum, you've got to know that just like in our world, there's good and bad people. And some people like to abuse their magic. It's not like what I've told you with James and Sirius, where they prank and tease people. It's much bigger than that. It's people who…steal. Hurt. Kill."

I swear Mum flinches when I say the last word.

I try to think of how to word my next phrase.

"You know how Petunia doesn't like me because I'm different? Because I have magic and she doesn't? I'm part of this world that she isn't a part of, and she doesn't like it. It's like that in the wizarding world, too. Except backwards. There are some wizards who are purebloods. That means that every member of their family is a wizard. There's no Mug—nonmagical people in their family. Almost everyone is a witch or wizard, and whoever isn't, the rest pretend don't exist. The Potters are purebloods, and they're some of the nicest people you'll meet.

"Other pureblood families aren't like that at all. Some think that they're better than nonmagical people, or Muggles. And in thinking that they're better than Muggles, they think they're better than Muggle-borns, or witches and wizards whose parents are Muggles. People like me. They also think Muggleborns are unworthy of magic because they have normal parents. "

"Lily," Mum interrupts, "you've told me the basics of this before. A couple years ago, when…you stopped being friends with Severus."

I did tell her about it then, but only the bare minimum. All I told her was that there are some names for people who are Muggleborn because other wizards think Muggleborns are beneath them.

"I know, but it gets much bigger than what I told you," I patiently say. "There's this guy now. His name's…Voldemort."

"Voldemort? What's he got to do with anything?"

"He _is_ everything, Mum. He's the one they call He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named or You-Know-Who. No one is saying his name lately. Everyone fears him so much; they can't even bear to say it."

"But why—"

"I'm getting there. Voldemort is one of the wizards that think that Muggleborns and Muggles are low. Really low. He doesn't want them to be part of the wizarding world, and he…he wants to get rid of them. And rule over the Muggles."

Mum gasps.

"I don't know too much about him or his plans, just that he wants power. And he's getting it. These Death Eaters, they're his followers. They join and assist him. Be it with kidnapping people, torturing people, killing people…They do it under his orders. They'll attack Muggleborns or influential Ministry people.

"It wasn't always this bad. It was just in the last few years that people really became aware of him. Basically, he's a really bad guy, who's doing really bad things, because he doesn't like people who aren't pureblood wizards like himself."

I pause to let it all sink in to my mum. Then I realize that there's nothing more I really can or want to say. I wait for her to speak. She doesn't for a while.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" Her voice is slightly shaky. It's only because she's my mum that I can tell.

"I didn't want to scare you," I say. My throat is beginning to feel tight, and my nose and eyes start to burn. If I keep talking, I'm surely going to end up crying. "I didn't want you to fear my world and think that all of my wizard and witch friends are like that. I didn't want you to forbid me from going to Hogwarts. Because I love it there, Mum. It's a part of me, almost as much as this place is." I gesture towards the beach and back towards our house.

"Could you really get hurt?" my mum asks.

I don't want to answer. I won't answer. I refuse to answer. "Yes."

Bollocks.

"But," I continue, "I want to do something. I want to fight, Mum. I don't know if it will be actual fighting against them, but I do want to help in any way I can."

"I know," Mum sighs.

"What?"

"When you were telling me this just now, I knew what was coming. I knew that you would want to help in any way you can. And with your nerve, drive, and brain, they'd be lucky to have you."

I give Mum a shaky smile. I'm really about to cry. "Thanks, Mum." I hug her tight against me.

Once she pulls back, she says, "Do you promise to tell me the important things in the future?"

I pause. "What if—with your medicine and the cancer—I wouldn't want you to—"

"Lily." My mum's voice is strong and firm.

"I promise," I reluctantly say.

"Good," Mum replies. "And if anything were to ever happen to me,—"

"Don't say that," I harshly interrupt. Mum ignores me.

" –I want you to know that I'm so very proud of you, and that, from the top of my head to the tips of my toes, every centimeter of me is positive that you will be able to make a difference in your world."

A single tear falls down my cheek, but I hastily wipe it away. I need to be strong. I'm a Gryffindor. I need to be strong.

I hug my mum again.

"I love you," she whispers into my hair.

"Love you, too, Mum."

As I say it, I hope with all my heart that nothing happens to her. I pray that she'll be able to live for a long, long time.

Mum is once again the first one to pull away.

"Let's go back to the house. We can watch a movie! What do you think?" She starts to stand up, but I stand up first to help her up.

"Sounds good," I tell my mum.

We start walking back towards our house, chattering away about what movie to watch. I feel calmer about this whole thing than I have in months. Although, a tiny part of me can't help but realize that Mum didn't ask if the Death Eaters go after a Muggleborn's family members.

That night, as I flip through the _Daily Prophet_ again, I'm overwhelmingly glad that she didn't. Once my parents are sleeping, I sneak downstairs and set up some basic protective spells on our house.

Just in case.

* * *

><p><strong>Lily seems like a worrier to me. Not like a big one, more like a very cautious person. I don't think she would tell her parents everything about Voldemort and stuff. <strong>

**So I loved getting responses to my writing and date questions, therefore I have another one: Has anyone gotten into Pottermore? How is it? What House are you in? Are you glad your in there? I won't be getting in until October. :(**

**See you again in a week,**

**MG**


	7. What's a Movie?

**Looks like a couple of people got into Pottermore! I still wish I could get in.. :(**

**Thanks goes to:**

**El Leon Y La Oveja (you know...I think that could happen... ;D), blank, Tyem Marodyor (yes, I wish we could've gotten an encyclopedia too :/), PenguinBoxers, softasthunder, Sammy-U, wingswordsandmetaphors, Luannie, yellow 14, Shhayy-j11, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, PenNameless1994, Analie Janes, Eleos, Roseflower94, the blibbering humdinger, Lady Alou of the House of Kerr, Almost Genius, and Rani Jashalithie.**

**The longer it takes for me to write these thank-yous, the happier I get. :)**

**P.S. Kinda, sorta mini _A Tale of Two Cities_ Spoilers. But it's practically nothing that would ruin the book for you, if you ever choose to read it. Also, people always make Lily a _Pride and Prejudice_ gal, so I changed it up.**

* * *

><p><em>He looked to the spot where Defarge the vendor of wine had stood, a moment before; but the wretched father was groveling on his face on the pavement in that spot, and the figure that stood beside him was the figure of a dark stout woman, knitting.<em>

"_You dogs!" said the Marquis, but smoothly, and with an unchanged font, except as to the spots on his nose: "I would ride over any of you very willingly, and exterminate you from the earth. If I knew which rascal threw at the carriage, and if that brigand were sufficiently near it, he should be crushed under the wheels."_

Even though I'm lying on the hot sand and the blistering sun is shining down on me, I can't help but shiver as I read those two paragraphs.

I've read this book before, so I know what happens, but at this moment, an inexplicable fear goes through me. As I read about this evil Marquis, my mind keeps flitting back to another evil man. An evil man that is very alive and strong right now. Voldemort.

But Voldemort and the Marquis are very different.

In the story, the Marquis doesn't have any magical powers or devoted followers, and he's only around for about three chapters before he is dead. Now, it seems that no one knows if or when Voldemort will die.

Voldemort and the Marquis, however, are very alike. The way they talk and speak makes me see the similarities. The Marquis refers to the peasants as rats, dogs, pigs, and has no consideration for them. He declares that he would gladly exterminate them all without a second thought. Voldemort is practically attempting to do that because he also thinks certain people are lower than him.

When I had finally told my mum everything that was going on in the wizarding world, I had felt calmed and relaxed. Now I feel tense and unsure. I have all these questions running through my head that I can't seem to get out. And the only surefire way to get questions out of your head is to ask them, but who could I ask?

I have no idea when Marlene will be able to visit, and it's not like I can write all my worries in a letter. It would take too long, and it's just not the same or as comforting.

I can't talk to Mum about it if it's partially about her.

Claire doesn't know anything about this stuff. And she doesn't seem like the type I would go to if I was having a dilemma.

Petunia wouldn't ever in a million years talk to me about this kind of topic. She doesn't even like for me to mention school. There's no way she would listen to my worries and fears.

The only person that really leaves is James. I obviously can't talk to him about it, however, because, 1) It would freak him out, 2) We aren't good enough friends to talk about personal stuff like that, and 3) He wouldn't even understand since he's a pureblood.

That leaves all my thoughts to me. And Clarence. When I really don't have anyone to talk to at the moment, I end up spilling my heart out to Clarence, my owl.

He's a very good listener.

"Lily! Stop reading and come do something!" James says.

Today my mother had decided we were going to have a Potter/Evans beach outing.

Actually, she decided it yesterday while I was on my "date" with Nate, and didn't tell me until this morning by yelling at me to "hurry up and get ready or we'll be late meeting the Potters".

Being frank, it's not a very exciting beach outing. Mrs. Potter and Mum are sitting in beach chairs, occasionally chatting, occasionally relaxing. Dad's sitting in the sand, crossword puzzle in his hand and pen marks around his mouth. (He taps the pen to his chin when he's thinking hard, usually forgetting that the cap isn't on when he does it.)

I'm lying down reading, and James is doing… James stuff.

Mr. Potter isn't here. I don't know where he is.

We've only been here for about thirty minutes, but it seems that James has already gotten tired of my boringness.

I sit up and see him wading in the water.

"Why?" I call back to James's demand. I really don't feel like getting into the water.

"Because I'm in the water alone and it isn't fun!"

"Bummer!" I shout.

My mum and Mrs. Potter give each other a shrewd look. What?

James makes a face and angrily stares at me. I crossly stare back. If he thinks he's winning this one, the poor boy is delusional. We stare at each other for about two minutes, neither one breaking, before James starts to climb out of the water towards me.

I wonder if he's going to sit with us now. I doubt it.

I lie down on my back and start reading once again, until the sun is blocked from me by a shadow and I feel drops of water splattering onto my chest and stomach. I move my book from my face and see James standing over me.

"Can I help you?" I politely ask.

"You're coming in," James says.

"No, I don't think I will thanks."

"Oh, yes, you are."

"And what makes you so sure of that?" I retort.

"If you don't, I'll tell your mum what you get up to at school," he threatens.

"Please. Me? I don't get up to anything!"

James sits down next to me and leans close to whisper in my ear. He smells like saltwater.

"Then you won't mind me telling your mum how Sirius and I found you snogging Wes in an empty class room last term?"

I feel myself tense up and a flush of heat runs across my body. James is talking about an incident where Wes and I were practicing for our practical Defense exam in an empty classroom, but then decided to take a break. We were, er, kissing with me sitting on a desk and Wes standing in front of me until the door opened, revealing James and Sirius.

That was probably the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to me. I don't know what the worst part was. It could be how Wes had immediately spluttered that we were studying, which led to numerous cracks from Sirius. Or it could be how…possessive James had acted when he saw us, yelling about House points, how we should be studying for our exams, and that I should conduct myself better. No, the worst part was…

"And how your shirt was practically undone, exposing your undergarments to the world?"

If it's possible, I blush even harder, but I continue to pretend like I hadn't heard a word he said.

In my defense, my shirt had been hardly undone (Three buttons! Only two more than usual!), and my bra was only _slightly_ visible. Plus, Wes and I had been dating for six months, and that was the farthest we ever went. Ever.

But yes, the worst part was that James and Sirius had seen my bra and a little bit of cleavage. I was mortified when Sirius had said, "Nice girls!"

After I had magically shut the door in the boys' faces, Wes had started profusely apologizing and was beyond embarrassed to do anything remotely close to that again.

The fact that James _remembers _seeing that, perhaps almost as vividly as I do, makes my toes curl.

Telling my mum though would be a low blow, even for James.

"You wouldn't tell them," I say.

"Want a bet?" he replies.

"Go ahead, I don't care."

James shrugs. "All right." He stands up again. "Hey, Mrs. Evans!" Mum turns to look at James. So does Mrs. Potter. He's bluffing. He's got to be bluffing.

"Do you know what Lily was doing back in school?"

He's joking. He has to be.

Mum and Mrs. Potter curiously look at James. "Sirius and I found her one evening—"

"Gosh, it's hot out!" I nearly scream as I jump up like a jack-in-a-box. "I'm going into the water. Want to come with me, James?" I grit my teeth when I say it.

"No, I'm okay. As I was saying, Lily was—"

I start dragging him away. "Really, I insist."

Before he can say another word, I've dragged him to the water. We're standing about mid-calf deep in the water when I finally let go of him.

"What was that?"

"Calm down, Evans, I wasn't going to…" he trails off, his sentence uncompleted.

"Yes, you bloody well were! And do you know what would've happened next? My mother would have been astounded. Astounded, I tell you! I wouldn't be surprised if she stood up and started asking me all sorts of embarrassing questions, such as if I need 'the talk' or…" James isn't paying attention to a word I say. He's actually a bit preoccupied.

Preoccupied staring at me. I feel really self-conscious, and I can almost see the blush on my face. I should not have worn this bikini. I shouldn't have worn a bikini, period. Dumb thing I've done number two thousand. It is my favorite swimsuit, though, and I love wearing it. It's so comfy, too. And…oh, right. Perverted boy staring at my body. He's probably looking at my large thighs or my small chest. I bet he's laughing in his mind right about now. This is unacceptable.

"James!" I snap my fingers in front of his face. "Knock it off. You're creeping me out."

James blushes a bright red and mumbles an apology. He starts looking down at the water. Goodness, can't he control his hormones?

I mean, if I was to look straight ahead of me and slightly down and see some smooth, defined brown abs, I most certainly would not be busy staring at them, wondering how on Earth a boy who just rides a broomstick could have something like that. And I most certainly would not be thinking that at least Jessica knew one thing she was talking about. And I definitely would not be thinking—

_Get a grip on yourself, Lily! _

"Let's swim," I say. I take a few steps forward before jumping into the water.

I swim until the water is up to my neck with James swimming beside me. Once I stop and begin to float, James stops as well and treads water across from me.

We're there for a couple minutes, neither one of us saying anything, the waves picking us up and gently putting us back down.

I look to my right and see the three adults still in the exact same positions. Again, I wonder where Mr. Potter is.

"Where's your dad?" I ask.

"Huh?" James says. He was pensively staring at the water and didn't hear what I said.

"I said, where's your dad?"

"Oh, he, er, had an important Ministry matter he had to go into. Totally last minute."

"Oh," I say. "How come he's gotten so many days off from work? My dad goes to work even when he's sick so he'll never have to take a day off. That way he can take more days off in the summer. Does your dad do the same?"

James stares at me. "Uh, yeah. He's been working there for so long, too, that they don't mind giving him a well-deserved break. And he can take his work with him as well, occasionally."

"Mmm," I muse. I didn't know that that was okay in the Ministry of Magic. "What does he do again?"

"Department of International Magical Cooperation."

"That's right. And your mum does…?"

"Did. Department of Magical Transportation. She stopped working about two years ago."

"Oh, yeah. I remember you saying that once at school."

"Yeah," James says.

I decide to float on my back and let the waves gently move me backwards and forwards as I wait for James to say something else.

"Remind me what do your parents do? I know my mum told me, but I can't remember."

"Dad's an engineer, Mum's a baker."

"Oh, right." James starts laughing. "Man, I remember in first year when everyone called your mum a house-elf after you said she has the same job as whoever makes the cakes at school."

I stand up and glare at him. "Yeah, I know. _You_ started that."

James gulps. "Did—Did I? Huh, who would've thought…"

"Oh, please." I roll my eyes. "Anytime someone made fun of me for something, you were somehow connected."

James runs his fingers through his wet hair. "I guess so."

I respond by floating on my back again and closing my eyes.

"I was kind of a slick git to you, wasn't I?"

I see my school self saying, "Kind of?" But a different part of me holds back on my sarcastic remark. It may just have been the way he said it, but it almost sounded like he regretted doing so. All I can think to say back is a simple, "Yeah."

There's another pause. "Sorry," James finally says.

I stand up. It must be the water in my ears, but I could have sworn I heard James apologizing for teasing me. "What?"

James intently stares at me and says, "I said that I'm sorry."

I don't know how to act or what to say. I have a solution to every possible comeback, snide remark, and pickup line that James could say, but this has never entered my mind as a possibility. Never.

So it surprises me when I reply with the standard, "It's okay."

James and I wade in the water for a bit, a wave occasionally coming up and splashing our faces. A few moments after I told him it was okay, I feel his foot touch my foot. It's just a little skim of our feet, and I ignore it. It was surely an accident, what with us trying to stay afloat.

The second time I get a bit suspicious. Please don't let the old James Potter come back!

I shoot him a suspicious look, but he pretends to have no idea what I'm hinting at.

Only a moment later, I feel his smooth foot move against my ankle again, and it surely can't be an accident.

"James! Stop it!"

"What?" He genuinely looks confused.

"Stop touching my feet! It's creepy."

"Lily…I haven't touched your foot at all."

Ha, yeah, right. Wait—what? No, he definitely touched my foot. "Yes, you did, just now. And two times before that…"

James stands up and curiously looks at me. "No…"

Something rubs against my calf now, and it's at that moment that I realize it wasn't James who was touching me. He's standing up now, and he's far away enough that I could tell if he was extending his legs towards me. I can also see his hands resting just underneath the water.

I look down and try to see what had touched me, when it touches me again. Now that I know it isn't James, I freak out.

"EEEEEEP!" I shriek and start splashing around. I jump up from one foot to the next, attempting to get away from the spot I was previously standing in, but really only splashing myself and James in the face.

I imagine my parents and Mrs. Potter are having a good old laugh watching me behave like a maniac. It certainly looks like James is trying not to laugh.

I feel it touch my knee now.

"Get it away! Get it away! GET IT AWAY!" I continue doing a weird combination of jumping and splashing, until I jump, well, right into James's arms. Really, I collide into him and smack him in the face with my flailing arms and he grabs me around the waist so I don't knock us both over.

I instantly freeze. So does James. His arms are still around me and I look up to see his face dangerously close to mine. Unlike with Nate, nothing is shouting out "Danger! Danger!" at me, but instead a wild "PANIC!" But it appears that my panic mode is recharging since I've wasted all my energy screaming over what was probably a fish. Or a crab. Or a flesh eating slug.

A particularly large wave breaks on top of James and I, and I become consciously aware of his arms on my bare skin. I feel the urge to suck in my stomach, but he would definitely notice. Instead, I quickly pull away from him.

That felt wrong, wrong, wrong.

Once I'm a safe distance away, I look at a spot above his right shoulder and speak. "I'm sorry. I…I don't like unknown things touching me."

I can feel James's eyes almost burning a hole into my face. He's probably going to personally check me in to St. Mungo's now. I bet he'll be my only visitor. Great. Just me and James for the rest of my lonely life.

Until I hear a snort. Then a chortle. Then a loud round of laughter. "You're a strange one, you know that, right, Lily? 'Get it away! Get it away!'" he imitates in a girly voice.

I splash him in the face. "If you had something touching you and you didn't know what it was, you would be reacting the same way!"

James splashes me back. "Please. I'd like to think I would have a bit more manliness in me."

I return his dose of saltwater. "Don't think so."

Instead of receiving a snarky comment, I get a mouthful of blue-green water. "Ugh! Oh, it's so on, Potter!"

"Bring it, Evans!"

And thus broke out a horrible splashing war, similar to one I would have with Petunia when I was…oh, I don't know…about the age of six.

And it was amazingly fun.

After I have water in my eyes and up my nose, and my throat tastes like I downed a bottle of salt, James and I are drifting in the water yet again.

"Lily?"

"Yeah?" My guard goes up. It wouldn't surprise me one bit if James pretends to ask a question, only to actually launch a sneak attack.

"What's a movie?"

* * *

><p>I incredulously stare at James. I can't believe I thought he was intelligent.<p>

"You're joking, right?"

"Er, yes?"

He's not joking! Oh my god.

"You seriously thought that the television was for decoration?"

James doesn't respond.

After the great Potter-Evans beach outing, James and I went to our houses and showered, and then I came over to James's house. We're currently in their seashell living room. Seriously. Seashell wallpaper, vases full of seashells, and seashells glued on tables with glass coverings. I don't know who decorated the Potters house before they came here, but these people are obsessed.

James had just admitted that he thought the T.V. was a wacky Muggle ornament.

"And you never thought to push the button that says power?" I ask.

"No," James defiantly says. "My mum always told me to never touch things if I didn't know what they were!" He's kidding, of course. We both know that if Mrs. Potter had taught her son that, he never would have listened to the rule. He's just trying to cover up for his daftness. I'm torn between laughing and hitting him.

I settle for rolling my eyes, but a smile still finds its way onto my face. "Never stopped you before."

"Yeah, well," James says, "I'm trying something new this summer. I'll have to do a lot of changing, but I'm working on being a better, less obnoxious and troublemaking person."

I snort. Yeah, right.

"Well lucky for you, you happen to have a very helpful and intelligent Muggleborn neighbor here this summer. So I'll show you how to work the television, and then we can watch a movie."

"You know," James says, "you haven't actually told me what a movie is."

"Right," I say. I turn myself so that I'm facing James, who is sitting on his navy blue (surprisingly not seashell) couch. "In the wizarding world, you take a picture of something and develop it and the people in it can move and talk, right?"

"Yep."

"Well in the Muggle world, there's a type of camera—a video camera—that can record things. It can capture a whole scene that's happening, and then play it back in a video. A movie is what Muggles watch for entertainment and it's shortened for a 'moving picture' because Muggle pictures don't move. Does that make sense?"

"Er…" James looks confused.

"Okay, a movie is like a wizard picture with lots of different people and different places to tell a specific story. Better?"

James nods. "Yes. So how do you work the telhavision?"

"Television," I correct. "Get off your bum and I'll show you."

James makes a big show about having to get off the couch and come over to the television set. So dramatic.

I show him the power button, volume button, and the channel button. He's fascinated with all of it. He especially likes to keep flipping through the channels to see how fast the pictures can change.

"'Kay, that's enough," I say. "Sit." I point to the couch.

When James sees that I mean business, he goes and sits down. I put in the movie and press the play button.

"What are we watching?" James asks.

I sit next to him on the couch. "Jaws."

"Excuse me?"

"Jaws. It came out about two years ago, but you'll like it. It's not girly or anything, don't worry."

"Okay, I'm trusting you, Evans," James warily says.

"Don't worry. It's good," I tell him.

And it is. James thinks so, too. The second the shark's first attack occurs, he becomes hypnotized by the screen. He doesn't even look away for the whole entire film.

The two men are swimming away on the screen when the credits start rolling, signaling the end of the movie.

* * *

><p>I'm waiting for James to say something. Anything would work really. He could say, "Wow! So cool!" Or, "I didn't know how smart Muggles are!" Or even, "Thanks, Lily! You're the greatest, smartest, best girl in the world for showing me what a movie is!"<p>

I'm not picky. Any would do.

"Well?" I say when he doesn't speak up.

He's just staring at the television. "That was…"

Amazing? Interesting? Enlightening?

"…awful," he finishes.

"Yeah, it was—what! What do you mean awful?"

How could he think Jaws was awful? That movie was like the best of its year!

"All those people," James seriously says, "they got eaten by the shark. And you said they make movies by cameras?"

I nod.

"Well, someone had to have the camera, right? Whoever had the camera just stood there and let those innocent people die…"

OH MY GOODNESS!

I immediately start laughing. I cannot believe this. This is great, really.

"Why are you laughing?" James nearly yells at me.

Oh, right. He thinks I'm laughing at innocent people getting eaten by a killer shark. Not good.

"No, no. You've got it all mixed up," I try to explain. "It's not real!"

"What?"

I start laughing again. If he wasn't confused before, he's confused now.

"It's not real! They're actors. All those people were hired to say and do certain things. Certain things that make the movie. Like a fairy tale, almost. The characters are made up, and people are hired to say and do stuff in the story, even if it isn't real. All those people were pretending."

James looks like he's experiencing an epiphany. "What about the shark then?" he slowly asks.

"Fake," I say. "It's a robot. The person who directed the movie made it out of like metal and stuff."

"Really?"

"Yep."

"Wow…" James is totally blown away at this. I probably look like an idiot just sitting here smiling at him.

"So now what do you think?" I ask.

"That was…bloody fantastic! Do you have any more movies? Where can I get movies? Why don't we have these at school? What—"

"Slow down! We can watch some more some other time, but I've got to go for now. Mum wanted me home by five to help with dinner."

James checks his watch. It's a really nice silver one. I expect he got it for his seventeenth birthday. "Oh, yeah."

James walks me to his door.

"Lily?" he asks as I stand on his porch.

"Yeah?"

"Er…"

Oh, no. He isn't going to ask me out, is he? That would ruin everything!

"Yeah, James?"

"I was wondering if—"

"No."

"What?"

That wasn't supposed to happen. "I, uh, it's just, if you're asking me out, it would be…no." I look at my feet. Rejecting James didn't bother me one bit before, but now I can't even do it and look him in the eye. What's happening?

"No, that's not…" James's face is bright red. He's blushed a lot lately. He never did before. "I was going to ask if I could come over and see if you wanted to do something tomorrow or the next day. You know, as friends. With Claire, too, if you wanted."

I breathe a sigh of relief. "Oh, yeah. Sorry about that, James. You know, habit."

He shrugs. "Whatever." He smiles at me, but it looks forced. I feel my stomach drop. Is he angry with me now?

"Okay, well, I'll see you soon?" I practically ask.

"As soon as you want, Evans," he suggestively says. I roll my eyes. This is the norm. I can handle this.

"Bye, James."

"Bye, Lily."

I walk back to my house thinking about James.

James.

Oh my gosh.

I've been calling him James. Not Potter, but James. And it's not even around other people either. I just called him James about twenty times TO HIS FACE!

It's almost like he's a whole new person. When I think of the black haired boy in all my classes from school, I think of Potter. When I think of the tall, tan boy in the beach house I'm currently walking away from, I think of James.

When I think of the word Potter, I think of the word git.

When I think of the word James, I think of the word acquaintance.

As I walk home, I toss the word friend around in my mind.

James, my friend. It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?

* * *

><p><em>Marlene,<em>

_Family and I went to the beach today with the Potters. Saw James in his swimsuit. Which means no shirt._

_Jessica was right._

_Absolutely, positively right._

_Damn her._

_Love, _

_Lily_

* * *

><p><strong>Andddddd...now they are officially friends. :) For me, I liked Lily's letter and the Lily and Wes thing. Some people think Lily's too Hermione-ish, and while I love Hermione, my Lily has had some fun and broken some rules. ;D<strong>

**Also, just a headsup, we are officially past the 1/3 point! **

**-MG**


	8. Beach Attack

**I know, I know. I promised an early update. But I changed the entire chapter and then had writer's block. I'm updating late, too, but at least I'm getting it out today. Hopefully this will make your Monday a bit better.**

**Thanks to Sammy-U, Eleos, Rani Jashalithie, Roseflower94, crazymacky, WhenTheMoonShines, Tyem Marodyor, HurricaneK, AcrosstheWater, wingswordsandmetaphors, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, yellow 14, Luannie, PenNameless1994, xMissWeasley11x (100th review! THANKS! :D), softasthunder, PenguinBoxers, and Kjc13. **

**This chapter is for PenguinBoxers, who made me realize that my chapters were all Lily/James friendship stuff, and HurricaneK, who reviewed even though she never reviews, and who should totally be an example to all you readers but not reviewers!**

**WE HAVE MADE IT TO 100. :D**

**This chapter does have some more cursing, as well as some implications of rape.**

* * *

><p>I get the feeling even before I see them.<p>

The sun is beating down on James and I as we walk back to Dudley Street from the beach. We had gone with Claire and had been there for almost three hours. My fingers are wrinkly from staying in the water for so long. I had made an offhand comment about not looking forward to N.E.W.T. Transfiguration this coming school year, and James is talking about how it is his favorite subject and he's really excited for it considering all the things he heard we're going to do as N.E.W.T. students. I'm listening to him, wishing we would already be back at our respective houses and out of the heat, when I feel a shiver go down my spine.

I have a wet swimsuit and a billowy white cover-up on, my hair is dripping salt water down my back, sweat is disgustingly forming on the back of my neck and on my forehead, and I shiver. That's odd, so I look around, but I don't see anything out of the ordinary. I look behind me and then I freeze.

A good distance away, but still visible, are two men dressed in black robes. One is large and broad with tight robes, as if his muscles are too large for any set of robes. The other is tall, lean, and fast looking. They're bad. So very bad. Any wizard with a pure heart and positive motives would not be this conspicuous. Their robes are plain, but menacing. They each have one hand casually resting inside their robes as they stroll down the street.

Every Muggle that passes by the two robed wizards openly stares at them in amusement. A wizard would have more of a chance of being hidden in London, because there are always freaks walking around there, but this is something new here. One little boy points at them and laughs, loudly asking his mother if the circus is in the town. I see the larger wizard's right arm twitch. I swallow the lump in my throat.

"Lily?" James didn't notice that I had stopped walking with him for a few moments. I turn my head back towards him and he's curiously looking at me. He walks back until he's standing next to me. I don't say anything; I just turn my eyes back towards the wizards. James's eyes connect with the wizards through the crowd of people. We both simply stand there, staring at them as they slowly get closer. I vaguely realize that we're probably doing the worst thing possible, but I can't find it in myself to move.

All of a sudden, the large bloke is staring directly at James and I, and I feel myself start to sweat even more. He nudges his friend, and then points to James and I, not even bothering to be subtle about it. They start walking faster. My blood turns cold.

"Lily, let's go," James urgently says beside me. He grabs my arm and starts pulling me in the direction we had been walking in before. I dumbly follow him and look at his face; I've never seen a look like that on his face. He looks angry, frightened, and confused among twenty other emotions.

"Where are we going, James?" I ask, regaining composure and pulling my arm out of James's hand. "Why are they following us? Who are they? Are they going to curse us?"

"I don't know," he answers, frustrated. "They saw me, though, and…Fuck. Oh, Merlin. Okay, just keep walking."

I don't have time to criticize him for his language. "What do you mean? Why does it matter if they saw you?"

"I don't know. I just look like—"

"Your dad. You look like your dad." I had never thought of it before, but they have striking similarities.

"Yeah, and I mean, we're a rich pureblood family, and my dad hasn't been at all supportive of Voldemort… I don't know, Lily, just keep walking."

His tone scares me. It sounds like he has no idea what to do. Neither do I. And that's bloodcurdling.

We reach an intersection and a crosswalk. "This way," I say, and we turn right down another street, getting farther away from our houses, but hopefully farther from the wizards. James and I walk as fast as we can without running, and my mind races as I try and figure out what to do.

James looks over his shoulder and quietly curses, telling me that they're still behind us.

"Why haven't they just jinxed us yet?" I ask.

"Dunno," James mutters. "Maybe they don't want to cause any trouble or have the Muggles see."

"I doubt it's because they care about the Muggles. Look at how they're dressed! Maybe they don't want the Ministry to find out they were here?"

James shakes his head and pulls at his hair. "Wake up, Lily. The Ministry isn't going to care if magic is performed here. We've been doing it for weeks. The Ministry knows my family is here, and they're going to assume that it was me, my mum, or my dad. They'd only send someone if magic attacks a Muggle, and it doesn't seem like they're doing that. Yet."

"They know I'm here too," I mumble, only just realizing it.

"What? Those guys? I doubt they know who you are, Lily—"

"No, the Ministry. Severus and I both got a letter from the Ministry from using underage magic the summer he came with us. And tons of people at school know I go here yearly, including Marlene's dad, who works with the Auror department. I wouldn't be surprised if the Ministry knows I'm a regular here."

"You got a-? Never mind, that's not important," James says. We both quickly walk around a family of six. "You have your wand with you, right? Please tell me you have your wand."

I nod. Thank God I decided to bring it on a whim today. I look at our surroundings and we're walking in front of a bunch of apartments and beach houses. "Follow me," I say, knowing where we should go. I lead James down the driveway of a white and red house. We quickly walk alongside their fence and their neighbor's fence until we are now behind all the houses. The narrow street has the backs of two rows of houses on both of its sides. The owners of the houses mainly use the street for putting out their trash. It's kind of like an alley in the city. James and I walk faster.

"Are they still following us?" I whisper.

"I don't know," James says, his voice equally quiet. "Probably."

We crouch down behind someone's metal trash bins and lean against their fence so we're hidden from view if someone decided to look down the alley. It's now eerily quiet compared to the bustle of the town we had been rushing through.

"Okay, here's the plan," James says. "You Disapparate to my house, tell my dad what's going on, he'll contact the Ministry, and then I'll stay here and wait for them to come around the corner. I'll Stun them when they show up."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!" I say. "'I'll stay here, you run away.' That's not happening, Potter!"

"Evans, look, there's no reason for you to get hexed when you can go and get help! Just go and do what I—"

I derisively laugh. "I'll get hexed? Oh, thanks, Potter. You know, you're not the only one who got an O on the Defense O.W.L. And just because you're rich and good at Quidditch doesn't mean you'll be able to get out of this without a scratch!"

James makes a frustrated noise. "Would you listen to me?" he snaps. "I'm not saying that I would, there isn't a reason for you to stay here, though! Just hurry the hell up and Disapparate!"

"I CAN'T!" I hiss at him. "Don't you remember? I _failed_ my Apparation test. Twice!"

"You're joking! You can't Apparate at all?"

"I can do it sometimes," I say, my anger with him increasing, "but I'm not licensed!"

"Who bloody cares about your license? We have Death Eaters after us!"

"I would hope that you would care if I splinched half my body and DIED! And who even said they're Death Eaters?"

James rolls his eyes. "Well it's not like they're friendly wizards here for some fun in the sun. Of course they're Death Eaters!"

"They don't _have_ to—"

"Shh!"

I stop talking. I can hear footsteps and I turn my head to the left, the direction they're coming from, and take out my wand. James has his out as well. Maybe it's just some people walking by. Or maybe it's a little old lady putting her cat out. Or maybe it's—

"Do you think they came down here?" a gruff voice asks.

Or maybe it's Death Eaters here to kill us. Funnily enough, I never thought I'd die pressed against James and a smelly trash bin. I always wished I'd be really old or at least doing something honorable. Well, I guess fate works in funny ways sometimes.

I quietly turn my head to the side and look at James. He's just staring at me. He doesn't even look abashed at me catching him staring at me. I blush, but I look back at him. Maybe dying trying to figure out what color his eyes really are wouldn't be too bad…

"Nah, they wouldn't have gone down this way," a second voice says. The second man sounds younger. I bet that he is the tall, skinny one. It gets very quiet. I assume they walked away. I breathe a sigh of relief.

"_Reducto_!" shouts the second voice, and a silver bin meters away from us explodes into pieces. I shriek at the sudden noise. James groans.

The two wizards start chuckling. "We know you're down here, pretty little girl. You too, Potter. And don't even try to Disapparate. We've made sure you can't."

"Bloody hell," James whispers so quietly I can hardly hear him. "I don't even have my cloak…"

How the buggering hell will a measly clock help us out in this situation? What will you do, James? Flap it at them?

I lift up my wand and tap James on the head, effectively casting the Disillusionment Charm. Slowly, he begins to fade from my sight. James's mahogany wand lifts into the air and strikes me on the head. I feel like cold water is trickling down my head and onto my neck, and then I am invisible as well.

The two men are very close to our bin now, but we don't dare to move for fear that they will be able to see us. Curse the Disillusionment spell for not being perfect.

"I bet you're a Mudblood, girl," the smoother voice says. "Who do you think she is, Dolohov?"

"She's got red hair," he says. "And from what I saw, a delicious arse. I bet she's that girl we heard about, that Evans girl."

I stop breathing, and I can feel James tense up beside me. I look down at my shirt. It's white and practically see-through, so they basically saw me in my bikini.

"Oh, yeah, I remember her. We've got some Slytherins at Hogwarts who tell us all about the Mudbloods at school. We hear you're quite the pretty one, Mudblood…"

James's breathe hitches, and I can practically feel the anger radiating from him. Me? I'm oozing terror. Plain and simple terror.

The two men are now standing in front of us and I've never been so scared.

"Oh, I hope we catch you, girly. The Potter boy will be a good ransom, lots of money, but you…You'd be a fine treat for whenever we feel lonely at night. We already know you're a screamer…"

Sick, twisted images pop into my mind, and I want to throw up. How dare that bastard talk about me like that? I fight the urge to curse the wizards. It seems like James is fighting it, too, but he loses this round.

His wand raises in the air. The skinny man sees the sudden motion and turns to look.

"What the-?"

He lifts his wand and points it at James, but he is not fast enough for James soon bellows, "_STUPEFY_!" The man flies off his feet and falls onto the ground unconscious.

"You little shit," the large one, Dolohov, declares, and he points his wand at James, whose outline can now be seen.

I point my wand at the man in the black robes and say, "_Petrificus Totalus_!" His large, beefy arms snap to his sides, and he falls to the ground as well.

I wait a moment before standing up and walking over to James, who has just tapped himself on the head with his wand. I do the same to myself, and the Disillusionment charms are cast off and we are as clear as day again.

James calmly strides over to the one I cast the Full Body-Bind Curse on. He points his wand right at the man's chest and says, "_Stupefy_."

James turns to look at me. "You okay?"

"Yeah." My eyes are trained on the two unconscious men. I'm ready to leave, but James faces the adult wizards again, and then he bends down to the bigger one.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

James just shakes his head and then lifts up the man's left arm. "James, come on, let's go." He ignores me and pulls the sleeve all the way back. Tattooed on the man's forearm is an ugly black skull and snake.

"They're Death Eaters."

"Thanks for that, James. I hadn't realized that at all," I sarcastically say.

The black-haired boy faces me. "Don't go all Lily Evans on me," he snaps, "because in case you haven't noticed, we just had two Death Eaters follow and attempt to capture us, and I don't have time for you to act like you've got a stick up your arse again."

"Well if you had just Disapparated us back to your house, then there wouldn't be a problem!"

"Well if you had learned how to bloody do it, then you could've done it yourself!"

"Well if you had actually thought things through for _once in your life_, you would realize that there was no reason for us to stay here and try and take on some full-grown murderers!"

"And if you had stopped being so selfish for one moment, you would've realized that if we had Disapparated we would have left men working for _Voldemort_ go do anything they wanted to your beloved town!"

That shuts me up. I had never thought of that. Curse James for being so noble.

"Do you think there are more?" I ask after a minute of silence.

"Could be."

"So what do we do now?"

"You go get my dad, and I'll stay here."

"What? No!" I protest. "What if they wake up or the other Death Eaters find you? Why can't we both just go get your dad and leave them here?"

"If they start to wake up, which they won't, then I'll just Stun them again. And if the other Death Eaters find me and I can't take them, then I'll Disapparate," James says.

"But I could stay here and you could get your dad—"

"Not happening," James stubbornly says.

"You could get to your dad faster by Disapparating. I would have to go by foot. You go get your dad and I'll stay here."

"You're not staying here by yourself."

"But what if they've got some tracking thing that will lead them right to these blokes and then they find you?"

"Better me than you, eh?" he jokes.

I stare at him with a serious face. "Not funny, Potter."

"Okay, you're right"—his hand tangles in his hair again—"but nothing's going to happen. Run back to my house and get my dad. Have him send a letter to the ministry. Just don't talk to anyone, Lily. And don't stop at all. Just go find my dad."

I nod, signaling defeat. "Okay, and if you hear anything suspicious, you need to leave."

"Deal."

I walk down the small street back towards town. When I reach one of the main roads, I feel easily attackable. I feel alone. I start to run.

I run faster than I thought it could run. My sandals are pounding on the ground, the backs are flapping against my feet, my swimsuit bottom is riding up, but I keep on running. I weave in and out through the crowd. People, houses, the ocean, all fly by. I don't stop when I get a stitch in my side. All I can think is that James is left alone with two Death Eaters and more might be coming. I run faster.

I finally see the yellow house. I stomp up the steps on the porch and nearly collapse as I push the doorbell. I try and catch my breath as I wait for someone to answer the door, but no one does. I ring it again. I'm pushing the hair off of my sweaty face when the door eventually opens. It's Mrs. Potter.

"Lily! How are-? My goodness, you look like you just ran around Hogwarts twice! What's going on?

"Mr.—Potter. Where's—Mr. Potter?" I pant.

"He's taking a nap. Are you all right? Do you need to sit down?"

"Death—Eaters—" I pant. "Followed—me and—James—"

"James?" Mrs. Potter shrilly says. "Where's James? Is he okay?"

I wave my hand in the air. "He's fine. We Stunned—them. But he's still there—waiting. We need—Mr.—Potter." I can barely get the words out. God, I need to exercise more.

Mrs. Potter ushers me inside. The house is cool and I go stand in front of one of their fans.

"Go get some water, Lily," Mrs. Potter orders. "I'll go wake Charles."

I go into the kitchen and don't even bother to get a glass; I simply stick my head under their sink like the fat, lazy lump I am. I sigh in relief once the cold liquid slides down my throat. Mr. and Mrs. Potter enter the kitchen only moments later.

"What's going on, Lily?" Mr. Potter says urgently but in a businesslike tone. "What happened?"

I can explain my story much more effectively now that I can breathe normally. I tell Mr. Potter only the things of the utmost importance, and Mrs. Potter goes to get their owl and some parchment.

Mr. Potter quickly writes a letter to the Ministry of Magic, and then we're out the door, with me leading the way towards James.

* * *

><p>"And how did you say you saw them?" Mr. McKinnon inquires inside the Potters' house. We're all there, including my parents.<p>

Mr. McKinnon's one of the top Aurors, so once the Ministry got Mr. Potter's letter, they had sent he and three other blokes to capture the two Death Eaters James and I had Stunned. One of them took them back to the Ministry for questioning, the other two are patrolling the town for any other Death Eaters, and Mr. McKinnon stayed to get the story from James and me. I'm glad it's Mr. McKinnon. I know him, and I feel a lot less awkward than if I was talking to a stranger. He looks like Marlene, too. He's got the same blonde hair, although his is thinning and a bit silvery. He's got Marlene's round blue eyes, though, so that's a bit comforting. I just have to pretend I'm talking to Marlene.

"We were walking back from the beach when Lily just stopped walking and was facing the opposite direction, and then I saw them. They weren't that hard to see, really…," James says. He's still in his blue swim shorts and t-shirt.

Mr. McKinnon, Mr. and Mrs. Potter, James, and my mum and dad all turn towards me. I awkwardly clear my throat and shift in the Potters' chair in their living room.

"I just got this weird feeling, you know? Like something was off all of a sudden. So I looked around, but I didn't see anything weird, but when I looked behind me, I saw them."

Mr. McKinnon nods before writing that down. "And then what happened?"

"Well," I say, "I froze because they were being so obvious it was like they didn't even care, which made me think that they were not good wizards. Then James turned around and he saw them and he stared at them, too. The big one noticed and then pointed us out to his partner, and then they started walking with more purpose in their step.

James and I turned around and began walking in the direction we had been, away from them, and they started following us. We kept walking until we reached a little road behind a street of houses."

"They were behind us for a while," James chimed in, "but they somehow found us again about three minutes later."

"Why didn't you Disapparate in those three minutes?"

James and I both uncomfortably put our heads down.

James is the first to speak. "We, er, well, we didn't want to just leave Death Eaters running around—"

"Why didn't one of you get me earlier?" Mr. Potter sharply says. I look at him and he looks very angry, but very tired.

"Because I didn't want Lily to stay by herself, Dad!"

Mr. Potter opens his mouth again, but I cut him off.

"I can't successfully Apparate yet." At Mr. McKinnon's incredulous look I say, "I was in the Hospital Wing the first day of the official test, and then I failed the second test, and then the third one, and I had only successfully Apparated twice, so I didn't sign up for any more tests, just the lessons. I wasn't exactly willing to Apparate because of the stories I had read about splinching and whatnot, I mean, losing an arm? It just sounds so… Anyway, by the time I was able to Apparate at the lessons, it was around exams, and I wanted to spend all my extra time studying instead of taking the test. I figured I could take it sometime this summer or when school started up again."

My cheeks are red by the end of my explanation and I avoid looking at James. I had heard he had passed the test the first time perfectly. Like everything else.

"Okay, understandable," Mr. McKinnon says. "They showed up in the alleyway, correct? Did they immediately find you? How did you Stun them?"

"We were hiding behind some trash bins, and they—uh—they couldn't see us at first, but then they blew up a trash bin and I kind of, you know, screamed," I finish lamely. I think my dad groans.

James takes over. "They started walking down the street and they knew it was me, and they guessed that it was Lily with me. And they started saying…stuff, and then—"

Mr. McKinnon looks up from his pad of paper. "What kind of stuff?"

James refuses to answer.

"Just like how James was going to be a good ransom," I say, "and that I could be, um…" I take a breath and look down at my hands in my lap. "Useful to them since I'm a girl," I mumble. "They also said they knew about all the Muggleborns at Hogwarts and called me a Mu—"

"Don't say it," James snarls at me. I don't finish my sentence. It gets awkwardly quiet.

"And then?" Mr. McKinnon presses.

"They were in front of us and they kept talking about me inappropriately and then James Stunned the big one," I say. "I cast the Body-Bind curse on the thin one and then James Stunned him. I ran back to get Mr. Potter, who sent a letter to the Ministry and then…yeah." I tuck my hair behind my ear and try to not think about how very lucky James and I were. I mean, why _would_ we just stay there? Why _couldn't_ James come with me when we had the chance before they arrived? _Why_ did I have to go get Mr. Potter instead of James? I don't think we thought at all. James was much more concerned with making sure I did nothing than with actually figuring out a good plan. Can I just blame this all on him, even though I was the one that screamed? I can? Oh, good.

That stupid git.

"Okay, thank you, James and Lily," Mr. McKinnon says. He stands up. "I'm going to head back to the Ministry now, and if I have any other questions, then we'll contact you."

"I have a question," James says. "What the hell were they doing here?"

Oh, James. Aren't you just the politest boy I've ever met?

Apparently, Mrs. Potter is thinking the same thing, for she says, "James!"

"I don't know, James," the Auror says. "Could be for anything really. It could've been because Muggles are here and they wanted to cause trouble. It could be because your family is rich, pureblood, and against Voldemort. They could've been after you. It could be something else entirely. That's all I can tell you, son."

There's a possibility they were after the Potters? I think such a Petunia-like thought that I'm ashamed of myself. I push it to the back of my mind and vow to never think of it again.

"I must be off," Mr. McKinnon says. "Charles"—he nods at Mr. Potter—"I'll notify you if we figure anything out. Lily"—he looks at me—"I'll have Marlene write to you." Then with a final nod towards my mum, Mrs. Potter, and James, he Disapparates with a crack. Silence pierces the room.

"I don't want you out by yourself anymore," Mr. Potter says to James.

"What?" James yelps.

"No. We're not at home anymore, James. You have to have your wand on you at all times. You can't go off by yourself anymore, not even to Sirius's," the older man sternly says. "I don't want you out after eleven either."

"I can't go to Sirius's? Dad, I have to go to Sirius's!"

"No," Mrs. Potter says. "You need to say here. After what happened today—"

"I'm seventeen! I'm an adult! If I want to go to Sirius's I bloody well can!"

"NO," Mr. Potter says. I try to shrink back into my chair and become unnoticeable. "You're a child, James. And you're going to listen to your mother's and my rules."

James cross his arms and begins muttering, a dark look on his face, but I can tell that he knows he has lost.

"Same goes for you, Lily," my dad says.

"What?" I incredulously say.

"Those rules apply to you, too."

"But, Dad, you've never given me a curfew that early before! Come on, you know I'm cautious! I never do anything reckless!"

"Yet you still ran into those people, Lils!" Mum says. "No, this is final. Have your wand on you at all times, and you can't go anywhere by yourself anymore. Curfew of ten-thirty."

"Ten-thirty? James's is eleven!"

"James is a man."

"Man?" I scoff. "And I'm a redhead! Mum, that's ridiculous. At least give me eleven."

Mum looks absolute on eleven, but Dad shakes his head at her. "Eleven, Lily," he says to me. "And if you get home at eleven-oh-one, you're grounded for a week."

I slump down into my chair. James and I almost got attacked, and it feels like we're being punished. Where's the justice in the world?

With a morose good-bye to the Potters, Mum, Dad, and I leave to go back to our own house. I consider putting up more protection charms, but I realize I don't know how to do any more.

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><p><strong>Way different than the past chapters, but I really do have somewhere to take this. It's not going to be huge, but it will be important. :) Any guesses as to what they were doing there? <strong>

**I swear, I'm going to give you all an early update this time. **

**-MG**


	9. A NotSoPeaceful Walk on the Beach

**Told you there'd be an early update. :D**

**Thanks to writergal24, YoungAndLiving, yellow 14, AjGirl15, AcrossTheWater, Rani Jashalithie, El Leon Y La Oveja, lilybethluna (yes, I just can't stand it when people rush the relationship, and its like BAM! two days later they're in love!), WhenTheMoonShines, Sammy-U (not quite... but lovely guess. I am trying to stick canon, though.), wingswordsandmetaphors, ginnyweasleylover99, Miss-Independent146, thebiggestpotterfreak (tests are terrible, aren't they? hope you did good!), MaryOlivia, SpencerReidFan89, PenNameless1994, Kjc13, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, Novelnerd97, PenguinBoxers, and Heimarmene!**

**This chapter is for YoungAndLiving, whose review made me laugh, who is spreading this story around, and (like all of us) wants credit for the great things she (he? I'm going with she. please don't hate me if you're a guy.) does. Hope this chapter satisfies you and that you don't have to make another complaint, although you can totally rant whenever you want. ;)**

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><p>The headline of the article is <em>Death Eaters captured by students at Muggle beach, taken in for questioning. <em>It's a small article, about a paragraph long, and on page three. Obviously, it is not big news. And considering that no one was severely injured and that the _Daily Prophet_ wasn't allowed to release my name, James's name, or the town where it happened it's not a very big surprise. I'm glad because—_Plink_!

Huh?

_Plink! Plink!_

I walk over to the door leading to my balcony, as that's where the noise is coming from. I peer through the glass just in time to see a pebble hit my door, instantly followed by another _Plink!_

I open the door and look over the ledge. And who do I see?

I see Nate standing on the beach.

"Lily! Hey!" he whisper-yells.

Aww, he was throwing pebbles at my door to get me to come out. When you take away the fact that the guy is a git and I've been avoiding him since our date, that's pretty romantic.

"What are you doing?" I whisper-yell back. I look down at my pajamas and unsuccessfully try to hide myself from his view.

"I want to talk to you! Can you come down?"

Er….

It's not sneaking out that bothers me, although I'm a bit unsure of it after everything that happened. It's really that I would be sneaking out to see Nate. And I don't want to see him.

But hey! He hasn't come over since our date three days ago either. Maybe he was avoiding me too, and now he wants to tell me we should just be friends! If I had enough courage/desire to end whatever this is, I'd probably do it in the dark away from other people as well.

"I'll be down in a sec!" I run into my room, shut my balcony door, and rifle through my drawers until I find some shorts. I put them on and perform an Undetectable Extension charm on one of my pockets, stashing my wand in it.

I quietly make my way through the hallway and down the stairs, making sure to hop over the third to the last stair to avoid the loud creak. I don't like to think of myself as a mastermind of sneaking out, but… I know the ropes on how to get out of this house. Half the times I think my mum and dad know I'm sneaking out or snuck out the night before. They just don't care. They know I wouldn't do anything reckless, stupid, or immoral. My sneaking out is actually respect for my parents. By sneaking out, I'm choosing not to wake them up and ask them if I can go out, when we all know the answer would be yes. Especially in this scenario.

It's just past ten thirty, and my dumb curfew is now eleven. My parents are early risers, which mean they go to bed early. Like, really early. And I was already in my pajamas because…Well I don't really know. But I have my wand on me, I'm not alone, and I'll be back inside by eleven. They could not possibly get mad at me for leaving. Plus, I'll only be out for about five minutes and hardly a kilometer away from my house.

I open the front door, step outside, and then shut it behind me. Nate's standing on my porch and smiles when he sees me.

"Hey," he says.

"Hi," I say back.

"Wanna go for a walk on the beach?"

"Sure," I say. I feel like this beach walk isn't going to be as much fun as the beach walks I take with my mum.

We go down the steps that lead to the beach and start walking in the sand. Nate puts his arm around my shoulders, but I casually lean down to take my sandals off, effectively getting his person off of mine. I hold my shoes in my hand and walk barefoot.

"I wasn't very excited to come here this summer, you know," Nate says. He pauses as if waiting for me to say something in return.

"Mmm," I say. I look up at the sky. There aren't any clouds out tonight, so the full moon is completely visible in the sky. It looks like a shiny, glass orb in front of a mass of glittery black velvet.

"But then I met you, Lily."

I'm sorry—what? This doesn't sound like an ice breaker to the "We should just be friends" speech! I feel myself break into a sweat. Coming out here to meet Nate was definitely a bad idea.

"And as soon as I saw your gorgeous face, I knew that this summer would be great. When we had that amazing date, I couldn't have been happier."

Could someone get this git a new pickup line book? The one he's quoting seems to be broken.

"I think we should sit down," Nate suddenly says.

"Uh, actually," I try to say, but Nate is already seated in the sand. I longingly look over my shoulder to my house. We hadn't actually walked that far. If I wanted to I could sprint away and make it back to my house before he had time to realize I was gone and stand up…

I sit down, but I make sure to put a nice, friendly distance between us. All I have to tell him is "Nate, I don't fancy you." The whole ordeal shouldn't take more than three minutes.

"Lily," Nate seriously says. I turn to look at him and see him staring at me. "I really like you."

Yes, coming out here was _definitely_ a bad idea. Who was I kidding? What boy would ask a girl to come meet him in the dark to break up with her?

"Actually, Nate, I need to—" I'm cut off by Nate. Nate's lips, to be exact.

For a split second, I'm so shocked I let him kiss me. It doesn't feel good. It doesn't feel like anything. It just feels like a person's lips trying to open mine. It's cold, bland, and not what I want to feel in a kiss.

I reach up, place my hand on his shoulder, and gently push him away. Nate pulls back and I take in some air. Before I have the chance to stand up or even to say a single word, Nate begins kissing me again. This time it's a bit more forceful.

All I can think is that I want this prat off my lips. I pull my face away, but he tries to kiss my jaw and neck. I really don't want him to kiss me and—

I REALLY don't want his hand going up my shirt!

I rip his hand out from under my tank top. It hadn't gone far—his hand had just grazed above my belly button—yet it was far enough for me to realize that he wasn't going to listen to anything I said.

"Oh, come on," Nate whines after I shove his hand away and move my face out of his reach.

I stand up. "I have to go home," I announce. I swiftly put my shoes on and practically run my way out of there. I make it back onto my street before Nate reaches me. He grabs my arm and I turn to face him.

I can feel my wand in my pocket. Do I dare use it against him? I could get in serious trouble for using it against a Muggle. Of course I wouldn't use it until things got serious. I pause. Things wouldn't get serious enough that I had to use magic…would they?

I look up into Nate's face. His eyes used to be gorgeous, but now they're hard and flat.

Nate leans forward and starts kissing me again. He tries to slip his tongue in my mouth and that's when I've had it. Forget trying not to hurt his feelings, this guy's a creep!

I powerfully shove his face away from mine. "STOP, Nate."

"I just want to have a little fun," he says. He tries to grab my hands, but I jerk them out of his grasp. "Don't be such a prude."

Prude? PRUDE? Did he just call me a prude? I am not-!

Am I a prude? There was that one time with Wes, but am I overreacting with Nate? He just wants to kiss me and—

Nate takes this as his opportunity to attempt to snog me again. The second I see him leaning in, I realize that there is not even the slightest possibility of me overreacting here. This boy is forcing himself on me, and if my daddy was here right now, he'd beat Nate's arse into the ground.

With every bit of strength I have, I put my hands on Nate's chest and push. He staggers backwards and almost falls, but he catches himself. He looks up and glares at me. He looks angry and…ugly. It's like his real personality is starting to shine through. And it's the cocky, bad boy who's used to getting everything he wants and isn't used to girls shoving him off. He starts to step towards me, his eyes dark and livid. Uh-oh.

I plunge my hand into my pocket for my wand and feel its familiar handle when _CRACK!_

The next thing I know, a fist is flying past my face and Nate is lying on the ground, clutching his jaw. I turn to see who my savior is, ready to kiss his feet and thank him, when I realize it's James. Oddly, I'm not surprised.

"Go," James demands. His voice is harsh and leveled. It's a single syllable, but if I was Nate, I would be extremely scared.

It looks like Nate is. He stands up, still holding his mouth, and casts a furtive look at James as he storms by. He simply glares at me. I know exactly what he's thinking and wants to say, though. It's okay. I've been called worse. And by more important people than him.

James and I stand there listening to Nate's footsteps fade away. I can't help but notice that James is breathing rather heavily.

There's an awkward silence.

"Uh," I say, "I…" I don't know what to say. "Thanks," I decide to say. I say it in an appreciative and earnest way. That's why I'm wholly taken by surprise when James explodes at me.

"Merlin, Lily, why do you have to be so _stupid_?"

I feel embarrassed at his words. It _was_ stupid of me to come out here, but isn't a friend supposed to comfort you? I've never had a friend who called me stupid and yelled at me when all I needed was for someone to ask me if I was okay. Like always, I hide my embarrassment behind anger.

"Me? I didn't know he was like that!" I scream.

James snorts. It's not a 'ha, ha' snort either. It's a vindictive snort.

"I didn't!" I protest.

"It doesn't matter," James harshly says, looking into my eyes. "You're always dating some prat. Why don't you ever go out with a bloke who would be good for you?"

I have a feeling I know what he's getting at, but it makes no sense. Is he implying himself? He can't be honestly saying that he thinks he would be good for me, is he?

"Like who?" I can't help but ask.

"Like…Sirius or Remus!" He flails his arms around while he says it.

I start laughing. "Sirius! That would be like dating you!"

It just slipped out. I really wouldn't say that if, you know, I _ever_ thought things out properly.

"What would be wrong with that?" James asks. His voice is still angry, but I can tell he's completely serious in asking this.

Normally I'd make a snide remark against James, but he didn't exactly do anything to deserve that. Besides, you can't insult a bloke who just saved your life. Or at the very least your body. How far would Nate have gone while ignoring my protests? I feel…violated. His hand went up my shirt! I have the urge to cry. I blink back tears. I turn my face away from James.

"Lily?" he cautiously says. I don't answer.

He extends his hand towards me then instantly pulls it back. "I didn't mean it. You're not stupid. You just…deserve the best," he murmurs.

I shakily breathe in and then put on a cheerful face and look up at him. "Thanks, you jerk."

After a moment where he simply stares at me with an unsure expression, he grins. "Anytime, Lily."

"Seriously, though, thanks. For, you know, punching him and getting him off me."

His face darkens at the mention of Nate again. "My pleasure," he says. I don't doubt that he probably actually means it. I don't say anything else. I'm a bit surprised that when some cocky arsehole is forcing himself on me, James Potter is saving me, rather than being the cocky arsehole.

James starts to walk down to the beach away from me. "Hey!" I call. He turns around. "What were you doing out here anyway?"

"Apparating to Sirius's flat. My mum doesn't want me to go to Sirius's anymore because of the Death Eaters, but I've got to go see them tonight."

"How come?" I ask.

"Er," James says, running his hand through his hair, "I've just got to talk to him."He shifts in the sand.

"Why are you all the way out here, then?"

"I didn't want my mum or anyone else to hear the sound Apparation makes, so I thought it would just be best to do it outside the house. Just in case. And when I saw you down here, I came over to see you and then I saw that bastard forcing himself all over you…" He forebodingly trails off.

"Oh," I say. A strange thought is occurring to me. Do I dare say it? Would it freak him out? Lead him on?

"James?" I decide to say. "You can always talk to me if you want to…"

I want to punch myself in the face. Could I be any more awkward?

"Oh, um, cool. You can talk to me if you want to, too, Lily," James replies. His hazel eyes light up as he smiles at me. I smile back.

When I see him smile at me, I want to talk to him. I just want to tell him everything. I don't care that it's James Potter and we're hardly friends and that we've fought about four hundred times, I just want to get it all off my chest. I want to tell him all my worries about Voldemort and my mum and my concerns with the future.

I open my mouth to just pour my heart out, but James speaks first.

"I've really got go," he says, looking up into the sky. I feel my heart deflate. There goes my chance at releasing some of this stress I've been carrying around.

"Oh, right. Sirius. Tell him I said hullo," I say, forcing a smile onto my face.

"Sure," James says. He messes up his hair with his hand once again before turning on the spot and Disapparating, leaving me alone in the dark.

I quickly hurry home.

* * *

><p>I don't tell my parents about what happened with Nate.<p>

The morning after, I instead choose to just tell Mum through a brief, "Nate won't be around anymore. And don't worry, I had my wand and was back by eleven."

Mum lowers her coffee cup onto the table she's sitting at with a hesitant expression on her face and from beside her Dad says, "Who's Nate?"

"A dumb boy, Dad," I say. I grab a blueberry muffin off of the marble countertop. He doesn't look satisfied with this answer.

"A boy?" I ignore him. There's no legitimate reason for him to get upset over someone I'll hopefully never see again.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Mum asks.

"Nope," I say, pouring myself a glass of milk.

"And why did you leave the house without telling us?"

"I was back by eleven and you guys were sleeping. Like I said, I had my wand. Calm down."

"And did he hurt you?" Dad demands.

I turn to face him. He doesn't look angry, but he will be if I ignore him again. "No, Dad." He didn't. All he really hurt was my pride, in an odd way.

"Are you all right?" Mum asks.

I smile at her. "Yep."

And I am. Sure, I could've done without the incident that caused me to brush my teeth for twenty minutes last night, but now I know what an arse that guy really is. If our date had gone just a tad better, I would probably be out on a date with him again right now.

Yes, things were better this way.

I take my muffin and milk upstairs to write back to Marlene.

_Lily!_

_Oh, I am so glad that you finally wrote back! I can't believe you fought Death Eaters! With James! Tell me everything about it! I practically fainted when Dad told me. I said to him, "Lily Evans? My Lily Evans?" He just nodded his head. So tell me everything! What happened? What did James do? Merlin, I'm glad you weren't hurt. But I still can't believe you had more adventure at a Muggle beach than I am having at the Auror office. Speaking of which…_

_Please, I'm begging you. Come save me from this awful, awful place. Any moment I feel like I'm going to drop dead. The physical and mental pain is excruciating. I don't know how much longer I'll have with you! And if—for some unfortunate reason—I do pass, I leave you all of my clothes and hair stuff._

_All right, fine. I'll admit. Interning in the Auror department is kind of cool. Of course I don't get to go out on missions with my dad or uncle yet. (Although I sort of wish I could go, just once.) Nor do I get to fight Death Eaters (unlike a certain redhead who should be writing a page in details in response.) I'm still doing the same things I wrote you about last time: I fill out, sort, and organize papers on recent crimes, reports of suspected Death Eaters, and Azkaban cell slots. It sounds creepy, but… It's all quite fascinating. I know in my last letter I complained about the whole thing, but I think I just might want to be an Auror after school. That would mean, however, that the greatest and most talented and beautiful witch who happens to be my best friend would have to tutor me in Charms and Potions every once in a while… Seriously, how you get an O on everything in those classes amaze me._

_From what you said about Nate…DUMP. HIS. ARSE. Please. You're at the beach! I'm sure there are plenty of other attractive blokes right across the street from you. And I don't mean James. _

_Now that the topic of James has come up, did you know you called him James in your past letter TWICE? I do hope the sun isn't getting to your head! (Also, it's interesting what you reported on the "sculpted abs of goodness." I so got tired of hearing Jessie talk about it last year, but since it's true... Did you do anything with James to make her go crazy with jealously? I doubt it, but, bloody hell, I wish you would!)_

_Now, I know you said not to do anything reckless, but there's this Auror named Alastor Moody. And he's so handsome and rugged…Kidding! He actually just spontaneously yelled "Constant vigilance!" at me right now, and I spilled a whole bottle of ink on my robes. They are my favorite ones, too._

_Mother said I can come whenever Father lets me off. That will be iffy and probably last minute, but don't worry! I'll run from the Ministry of Magic with my swimsuit in hand if I have to! _

_Love,_

_Marlene_

I start laughing again when I reread Marlene's letter. Her past note had consisted of her complaining all about work and how awful and boring it was. And here she was, enjoying the whole thing and wanting to be an Auror now!

I can't imagine Marlene as an Auror. Actually… I can. I just don't want to. Marlene…she's always been one to speak her mind. She's stood up to the nasty Slytherins for me, and along with James, Sirius, Remus, and I, she's on the top in our Defense classes. Marlene McKinnon, Auror. It does sound nice. It fits her well. I just wouldn't want anything to happen to her.

I pull out some parchment and promptly begin writing a response. I tell her that she could be a great Auror, how she better be careful, intern or not, and how, no, I hadn't done anything to make Jessica crazy with jealously, and I wasn't planning on it. Then I write about the Death Eaters and the night before.

I had just gotten to the point in my story when Nate was trying to feel me up when I hear an extremely loud owl screech.

"Clarence! Shh!" I turn around from my desk to see Clarence opening one round eye at me, still in the same position he was twenty minutes again when he was sleeping. Clarence didn't shriek.

I hear the shriek again. I look towards my balcony and see a beautiful barn owl sitting on my sill. It has a letter in its beak.

I don't recognize the owl. It's not Marlene's and I doubt it's a school owl. They shouldn't be arriving for a while.

I have friends at school besides Marlene (she's just my best, best friend), but the owl doesn't belong to any of my other friends.

I open up my door and the strange owl swoops in, drops the letter on my bed, and then lands next to Clarence, trying to steal some of his water.

I open up the letter and the handwriting is small, straight, and vaguely familiar.

_Sorry I had to leave so suddenly last night, Evans. You okay?_

James. Figures. He would be the one to send me an owl while he's across the street. I guess this is the owl that Mrs. Potter sent to the Ministry. I never did see it.

I turn towards the Potters' owl and say, "Stay here." He (she?) simply blinks in response.

I find some parchment and respond to James with a simple_, I'm fine, Potter. I still want to go punch the prat, but I suppose you already took care of that. How was Sirius's? _

I can't help but feel bitter that the moment I decided to spill all my secrets and worries and fears, he runs off to his mate's house, probably to drink and get into trouble. I obviously can't let James know, though, so I just fold the letter up and give it back to the nameless owl. "To James, please," I say. The owl hoots and flies across my balcony and out of sight.

I barely have time to collect my quill and sit back down to finish writing to Marlene when I hear someone from outside.

"Look, Daddy! An owl! An owl is flying into a house!" The voice sounds like it belongs to a little girl.

Oh, damn.

Just then, the Potters' owl (I'm going to call him Otis) flies into my room.

"I don't see anything, Penelope," says a man, who I assume is the little girl's father.

I breathe a sigh of relief. That was close.

"Come on, let's go find some seashells," the man says.

I slowly walk onto my balcony and see a girl about the age of five walking down the beach with her dad. The girl seems to forget about Otis and starts singing a song about seashells.

"Seashells! Seashells! Seashells!"

I close the door.

Clarence hoots irritably at Otis's reappearance. I ignore my owl and take the note from Otis.

_That I did. And it was a splendid punch, if I do say so myself. Sirius's was the same as it always is. Nothing terribly exciting,_ the letter says.

I snort. As if Sirius and James could ever get together and not do something terribly exciting.

I clearly can't send my letter back with an owl, so I decide to just go and talk to James. I change into some clothes, slip some shoes on, and open my bedroom door.

"I'll be back. Clarence, share your food and water with Otis," I tell the two owls that are in my room.

I find my dad sitting out on the porch with a book in his hand. "Dad," I say, "I'm goning to go see James. I'll be back five minutes."

He absentmindedly nods his head, and I walk towards the yellow house. Once I reach the door, I ring the doorbell and patiently wait for someone to answer it. Mr. Potter does.

"Lily," he says when he sees me, "it's good to see you. Are you here for James?"

"Yes," I say.

"Come on in," Mr. Potter says. I follow his black-and-white hair covered head into the house.

"James!" Mr. Potter calls. "Lily's here!" James doesn't answer or come to the door. "James!" Mr. Potter yells again. The strain of yelling, however, causes him to wheeze a couple times. I'm not so sure what to do. Do I pat him on the back?

"Mr. Potter?" I cautiously say.

He turns to me, smiles, and says, "Being old is bloody awful."

I laugh. I like him.

"_Sonorus_," Mr. Potter says. "JAMES!"

His voice was magically magnified so the whole house should have heard it. Maybe even the neighbors.

In less than thirty seconds, James comes running down the stairs. "Yeah? Oh, hi, Lily," he says when he sees me. He runs his fingers through his hair. _Why_ does he do that?

"Hi, James," I say.

Mr. Potter walks away into a room on my right that looks like their dining room.

"Someone saw your owl," I tell James.

"Really?" James says. He doesn't seem very concerned. "Did someone say anything to you?"

"No, it was just a little girl who saw. But I figured it'd be better to talk to you over here. I was wondering, though, do you want to go to the beach today? We can see if Claire can come, too."

"Can't," James says.

"How come?" I ask.

"Too tired," he says.

I look at him and notice that he does look reasonably tired. He has bags under his hazel eyes.

"You must have had some fun last night, Potter. Did you get any sleep?"

"Er…" James sheepishly grins.

I roll my eyes. "It will be fun," I say. "Claire will want you to come."

James looks at me for a moment with an unreadable look in his eyes. Just as I'm about to ask him what he's staring at, he sighs.

"All right, fine."

"Yeah?" I excitedly say.

"Yeah," James says.

"Great! Do you want me to come back over in ten minutes? Will that give you enough time to get yourself ready and your stuff together?"

James makes a sound of disbelief. "Please. I'm not like you birds. I could get ready in two minutes."

"All right, all right," I grumble. "No need to be insulting. I'll be back here in ten minutes. You better be on the porch ready."

James rolls his eyes. "Fine."

His attitude slightly offends me. "You don't have to come if you don't want to," I say.

"Sorry," James says. "I want to come." I raise an eyebrow. "Really, I do!"

"Okay. I just don't want you to complain the whole time we're there. Merlin himself knows I've listened to you complain enough to last a lifetime," I jokingly say.

"What! I do NOT—Only on occasion—Not a lifetime!" James splutters.

I just smile and head towards the door. "Ten minutes, Potter!" I call over my shoulder.

* * *

><p><strong>Yeahhh...I just couldn't make Nate disappear. Hope you all liked that scene. I know there's a bunch of those stories where the guy cheats on her and Lily is comforted by James, so I hope this was originial yet satisfying. If not...tell me. I'm also pretty sure we all know why James was in such a hurry to get to Sirius's. ;)<strong>

**These reviews are making my days. Remeber: All reviews appreciated. Constructive criticisms, hopes, likes, dislikes, opinions, even rants about how James and Lily should just freaking get together already, to which I'll respond and say "Darn right!" with a redneck accent. **

**And because I love these questions and WILL be one of those authors...Favorite Harry Potter book? Mine is, without a doubt, Deathly Hallows. No competition. **

**-MG**


	10. Movie Madness

**Don't kill me. Internet was down. Finally found a spot in the backyard that will allow me to hack onto the neighbor's wi-fi. **

**Review, favorite, alert explosion! 10 House points tooooo... chili's-girl [thanks! I've never actually read a summer L/J before, but I can imagine some typical stuff. Glad to see you enjoy mine more. ;)], pineappleshaker [Or is he? *Dun dun dun* kidding.], Regina, JPLE, marinewife08 [Husband's in the military? Thank you so much for everything he does. :)], NegligibleNaina, BlindMindLover, MarauderMegan [more jerky James, no worries. ;D], softasthunder [...you're going to hate this chapter...], StillLearningHowToFly, xjustarandomreaderx, yellow 14, percysis16, PenguinBoxers, PenNameless1994 [Lily is very foolish at the summer house. I tend to think that she's uptight at school, but at the beach she does whatever without thinking of the consequences.], YoungAndLiving [Aha, James stalking Lily would be a no-no!], wingswordsandmetaphors, AcrossTheWater, Sammy-U, Sarahrules336, lizthegingerone, chocolatesnipe, writergal24 [Sirius? Oh man...yeah, I'll make Sirius come. He's so wonderfully amazing, though, and we know very little about him that it's hard to make in IC, but enough about him to make him OOC. I shall do my best though, because really, who DOESN'T love Sirius?], lilybethluna, El Leon Y La Oveja, Eleos [Bring out the murder weapon...], Peace-bookluva, Almost Genius [In due time...], Nightlight753, Tyem Marodyor [Marauders/Lily=LOVE], and Rani Jashalithie!**

**To all the responses, James was sneaking out to go help with Remus. Obviously he couldn't say that though, so he just said he was going to Sirius's. That's why he was ridiculously tired the next day.**

**Cool how everyone likes a different book the most. Although no one said my second favorite, Order of the Phoenix! I know, I know...no one likes it, but I loveeee it!**

* * *

><p>Petunia is officially here.<p>

I woke up this morning and groggily walked downstairs to get some breakfast. Through my half-shut eyes, I saw my mum and dad sitting at the table, as well as a bony, blonde girl that could only be my sister.

I'm still standing here staring at them. For a moment, none of my family notices me, because Petunia seems to be talking about something extremely important.

Probably the newest cleaning product on the market.

The kitchen gets awkwardly quiet when they finally notice me.

"Er, hi, Petunia," I say.

"Hello, Lily," she replies.

It would be incorrect to say that Petunia and I always had an off relationship. Because when we were little girls, we were the best of friends. Sure, we argued and Petunia often yelled at me for my unexplainable magic, but we always went to the park with each other and stayed up late sharing secrets in the tents we made out of blankets.

It was when I met Severus and got my letter to Hogwarts that everything changed. Petunia would rather die than now admit it, but she wanted to go to Hogwarts with me. She even wrote a letter to Professor Dumbledore asking if she could go. It was from her being a Muggle and the jealousy she felt that effectively ruined our relationship.

I'm not going to say it's all her fault either. I knew that Petunia was jealous of Hogwarts, but on some scale I still wanted to share the experience with her, which probably only made things worse. Therefore, when I came home for the holidays, I would tell her and my parents all about school and my classes and professors. Petunia never listened. She just called me a freak (under her breath as we got older), and then tried to change the subject to something Muggle related.

I was desperate to get her to see that magic wasn't something to be feared and hated, but rather something to be admired and interested in. So desperate, in fact, that I purposefully broke the rules by performing magic under the age of seventeen, just to show her what I could do.

Petunia called me a weirdo, a scary owl from the Ministry swooped in and gave me an official warning, and then I never tried to show her magic again.

As we grew older, we grew even more apart. While that itself is a sad, sad fact, it's better than our parents trying to force us together. We had reached a mutual understanding at this point: Keep your distance, do your own thing, do not talk about Hogwarts. That's how it worked. And that's how Petunia liked it.

There's currently another awkward silence. I try to fill it and say, "When did you get here?"

"About nine this morning. So not too long ago," she says.

"That's nice," I say. "And how's Vernon?"

Petunia's face finally has a genuine smile on it. "Good. I think he might propose to me soon. He keeps hinting at it. We would probably wait a year to get everything ready, but he's still probably going to ask me any day now."

At this, Mum makes a noise of happiness. I can see it now. Mum would be all over the wedding planning. She would love to go dress shopping, insist on making the cake, and then advise on the perfect flowers for the ceremony.

While the thought of her eldest daughter getting married brings my mum joy, it just sounds odd to me. Not to mention she's marrying a person like Vernon Dursley.

When we were little, I used to think that Petunia was going to marry someone who was handsome, disorganized, adventurous, and loved to have a good time. He would be the complete opposite of her, and it would balance the two of them perfectly. When I told Petunia this, she laughed and mysteriously smiled.

Unfortunately, this Dursley fellow is not handsome, disorganized, or adventurous, but a right stick in the mud. But as long as Tuney's happy…

I smile at my big sister. "That's great," I say. She doesn't respond and the kitchen is quiet again. I see my mum shoot a furtive look at my dad.

"How has your summer been going?" she stiffly asks.

The only reason she's even attempting a conversation with me is our parents. While they no longer try to force us to be best friends again, I know it upsets them—especially Mum—when we argue and ignore each other. Moreover, the one thing Petunia and I can agree on is that we do not need Mum to be any more upset than the bare minimum.

"Great," I chirpily reply, "as usual. There are some really nice kids here this summer," I add, thinking of James and Claire.

"That's good," Petunia says impassively.

I inwardly sigh. Whom are we kidding? Petunia will never be able to accept me.

Thankfully, the doorbell rings, halting any future stabs at a conversation.

"I'll get it," Dad says as he gets up out of his chair.

From the kitchen, I hear him say hello to someone and invite him or her in, but I already know who it is: Claire.

"Lily," I hear my dad say around the corner, "it's for you."

I turn towards the doorway and am surprised to see that it's not Claire, but James.

"James! Hey! What are you doing here?" I look down at my pajamas, but I can't bring myself to care. Probably because he has (unfortunately) seen me at the best of times and at the worst of times. Living, eating, and attending classes with someone for six years will make sure of that.

James looks down at my pajamas and he looks back up at me. He grins. "Bad time?"

I resist the urge to stick my tongue out at him. "No," I forcefully say, "it's just fine. What do you need?"

"Remember how you showed me a film?" I force myself not to laugh at how he says it. "Well my dad just told me there's this store where you pay to see them on a huge pellyvision!"

I cringe and look around. Mum and Dad look amused, but Petunia looks scandalized.

"WHAT," she says, "is a pellyvision?"

Uh-oh.

James looks around me at Petunia and appears to have only just noticed her. He smiles at Petunia, messes up his hair, and says, "Hey, I'm James. I go to school with Lily."

The moment James says "school," Petunia is livid.

She turns to my parents. "You mean he's…like _her_?"

Dad reluctantly nods.

Petunia makes a disgusted face and stands up. She dumps out her mug of what I assume to be tea into the sink.

"Er," James starts to say. I really hope he doesn't say anything else. It will only make everything worse. "Is something wrong with Hogwarts?"

I swear my dad slaps his hand to his forehead after James asks this.

"What's _wrong _with that school?" Petunia hisses. Mum squirms in her seat. "Nothing, besides the fact that it's for _freaks_!"

James openly stares at her. When she storms out of the kitchen and up to her room, he looks astounded. Mum looks glum and I feel guilty. I walk over to her.

"Don't worry," I whisper. "I'll talk to her later, okay? I'll fix it." I smile at her and she lightly smiles back.

I walk back to James and seize his arm, leading him to our front door. "Let's go," I mutter. He doesn't say anything until we're standing on the porch again.

"WHAT was that?" he demands.

I don't know how exactly to explain it, nor do I really want to, so I simply say, "That's Petunia, my sister."

"I didn't know you had a sister," James says.

"Well it's not like we were friends or anything at school."

"We could've been."

"No we couldn't have."

"And why not?"

"Because…because you're James but you're Potter, too!" I wildly move my arms around while I say it. Yes, I'm batty.

"What the bloody hell does that mean?"

"It means…" I sigh while looking around. The Rohers (the older man and woman who regularly stay down the street) walk by and curiously look at James and me. Their looks remind me that I am still in my pajamas.

"Wait here," I say, "and let me get dressed. Then we can walk on the beach and talk, okay?"

James still looks cross, but agrees.

I turn back into my house and get dressed. Luckily, Petunia does not emerge from her room, so I don't have to deal with any of her rude comments. I quickly tell my parents I'll be out with James, and then I meet him on the porch again.

It's silent until we start walking on the sand.

"So what did you come over for again?" I ask.

"I found out they show films at this place called a cinema, and I wanted to see if you wanted to go with Claire and me tonight. But that's beside the point. What was your sister so upset about?"

I bite my lip. I really do not want to tell him. So far, I have succeeded in only revealing my damaged relationship with Marlene and Severus. That is how I like it. James probably won't even understand anyway. "Nothing," I say. "She's just crabby sometimes."

James makes a noise of disbelief. "Right. And Manticores are misunderstood creatures."

"They could be!"

"But they're not. Now what's the deal with your sister?"

"You're awfully nosy," I say in a weak attempt to avoid the present topic.

James absentmindedly waves his hand in the air. "I know. Now tell me what her problem with Hogwarts is or I'll ask her myself."

I gasp. "You wouldn't!"

He turns to look at me. His whole expression says, "You bet your arse I would."

"Fine," I grumble. "She's the reverse of a Death Eater. Happy?"

James laughs. "What?" He obviously thinks I am joking. Oh, how I wish I were.

"Death Eaters don't like Muggleborns like me because I'm not a pureblood like them. Petunia doesn't like me because I'm not a Muggle like her."

The smile that is on James's face disappears. "What?" he repeats.

"Do you want me to say it again?" I impatiently ask. He shakes his head.

"Petunia hates me because I'm a wizard. In addition, because she is jealous, I expect, but she would never admit it. She calls me a freak, a weirdo, etc. Anything magic related sets her off. So when you said you go to Hogwarts with me, she freaked out." I say the last part in a matter-of-a-fact tone.

"So…basically, you're rejected everywhere?" he slowly says.

I feel like he slapped me in the face. No one—ever—has dared say that aloud. Not Marlene; never Severus; not even my mother, though I know she was thinking it when I told her about Voldemort.

The truth is that I always felt like that; I always felt like I would never be completely accepted. I just never had the courage to admit those words to myself.

"Guess so," I causally say. I attempt a light laugh, but I sound like a dying cat.

James doesn't say anything, so I don't either.

"They're all idiots," he finally says. He says it as if it is nothing but the one-hundred percent truth, practically a law, and no one would ever dare contradict him.

I don't have enough fingers and toes to count the people that would contradict him. I also don't have the desire to tell him this.

"Yeah," I softly agree.

We do not say anything more on the matter.

* * *

><p>"I mean, no offense, but why did he invite you?"<p>

I am standing outside the old cinema in town with Claire. She was quick to point out that while she was happy to see me, she wasn't necessarily happy to see me here and now.

I, on the other hand, am very happy to be here, minus the fact that I'm apparently crashing a date.

This cinema is fantastic. It's old and the letters on its sign are faded and busted, but, like all things to me in this town, it has its own special quality.

I have only been here a couple times over my years, and most of those times were to see films I had already seen. This cinema is notorious for its late showing. (Tonight we are going to see Star Wars, which I saw with my dad almost two months ago.)

Nevertheless, this little cinema is also famous for its popcorn. It is home to quite possibly the greatest popcorn on the planet. The workers put it in those cute red and white striped bags, they make it buttery and crunchy, and on top is this sort of cheese seasoning… Mmm, my mouth is beginning to water just thinking about it.

I wipe off my drool and listen to Claire.

"This would have been our second official date, but—"

"Second?" I ask. Frankly, I'm a bit offended that neither she nor James felt the urge to tell me that they had had an official date. Even then, they have already had a date; it shouldn't bother her so much that I'm there. It's just three friends going out to the cinema together, where two of the friends like each other. It's not as if I'm some stupid third wheel, right?

….

Oh, GOD. I'm a stupid third wheel! I'm not a third friend in this awful relationship; I'm a third wheel they feel the need to drag along! Well isn't that just bloody _perfect_. No, it's not as if I thought James actually liked me as a person and wanted to be my friend when it turned out he was only being friendly for his girlfriend's sake. Well isn't this just peachy keen.

"Yeah," Claire says. She giggles and flips her gorgeous brown hair. I casually look down at the pieces of red hair that are on my chest and shoulders. I look back at Claire's brown hair. I internally curse whoever in my family gave me the redhead gene.

"I made the first move and asked him to go out and get some lunch with me, since he was too shy."

James? Shy? James Potter, shy? Ha!

"When was that?" I ask.

"Um, about a week ago." And neither one of them told me?

"How'd it go?" I cannot help but ask. I am a girl after all, and I do like to be informed! Even if the information is an effing week late.

Claire wistfully sighs and crosses her tan arms.

"It was fantastic. He's so funny and charming. Not to mention bloody handsome."

"Bloody handsome?" a new voice says behind us. "You wouldn't be talking about me, would you?"

Claire and I turn around to see a smiling black-haired boy with glasses standing behind us: James.

Claire laughs. "Of course not, I was talking about your dad!"

Er, what?

"Well, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, eh?"

I roll my eyes. Bloody handsome? Pah. Not in your dreams, Potter. All right, so you may be slightly more on the attractive side. I glance at him and Claire smiling at each other. Okay, you are definitely on the attractive side. But handsome? You would only be handsome after I have had a few Firewhiskeys.

James turns to me and grins. "Hey, Evans."

Two words come to my mind: Bloody. Handsome.

Wait—WHAT?

"Hi, Potter," I meekly say. Did I just think that James was bloody handsome? What's happening to my sanity?

James and Claire begin blithering about some nonsense, unaware that I'm about to make a personal appointment at St. Mungo's for possible undiscovered brain damage.

"Shall we?" James holds out his arm to Claire, who giggles and takes it. They walk inside, and I dumbly follow behind.

We end up getting two popcorns, James's treat, one for me, and one for the two lovebirds.

We sit in the very middle of the cinema, perhaps the best seats there. I sit on the outside next to Claire, with James on Claire's other side.

Claire whispers into James's ear as we sit there, and he laughs and smiles, and then says something back to her. I sit there angrily chewing on my popcorn.

Munch, munch, munch.

Giggle, giggle.

Laugh.

Hand angrily digging through popcorn bag.

Munch, munch, munch.

Giggle.

Laugh.

It's like it is some sick symphony.

The familiar music of the film begins to thud through the speakers, and James sits forward in his seat, staring at the screen in awe. Claire tries to talk to him again, but the words are now rolling across the screen, and he only half-heartedly nods his head before sitting forward on the edge of his seat, entranced by the screen.

I smugly smile. Girlfriend or no girlfriend, he's still James Potter.

* * *

><p>Once the movie is over, James excitedly talks the whole way out of the theater about it. He keeps exclaiming about the light sabers, the spaceships, and Darth Vader. He was so enraptured during the movie that he and Claire did not talk, hold hands, or giggle, much to my satisfaction.<p>

"I have to use the restroom, I'll meet you guys outside," I tell Claire and James as we walk through the lobby.

They nod in response, and I can hear James saying, "Did you see that explosion!"

I chuckle to myself and walk to the lavatory. Unfortunately, every other female who saw a film that night has to use the bathroom as well, so the line is atrociously long.

After what feels like ten minutes, I get to use the bathroom.

Once I am outside, I look around for James and Claire. There is a mum trying to control her boy triplets, who, like James, are exclaiming about the movie; a snogging couple off to the side; a group of morbid teenage boys smoking cigarettes, casually looking at girls' buttocks as they walk by; and a rowdy group of girls that look like they are all the age of ten. I do not see James and Claire anywhere.

I look at the group of smoking teenagers, but quickly turn away when I see one of them leering at me.

My eyes drift towards the snogging couple to my right. The girl's back is on the wall, while the boy is leaning over her, his hands on either side of her head.

They finally break apart, and even from the distance, I can see them smile at each other. Ugh, happy couples.

I turn away, but out of the corner of my eye, I see the boy run his hand through his hair, making it even messier than before.

Merlin, no, please, anything but this…

I slowly rotate so I am facing them again, and the sight confirms my fear: That is Claire and James snogging.

My stomach clenches in anger. I went to the bathroom—the bloody bathroom!—and they start jumping each other while waiting for me? This is absurd.

I stalk towards them and put a smile on my face. It's probably a maniacal smile, though. I am shaking I am so humiliated.

I am only a few meters away when they lean in and start kissing again.

What. The. Hell.

I stand there like an idiot, debating what to do. On the one hand, I can go and interrupt them, but how awful would that make me look? On the other hand, I can just leave since they would hardly notice. However, if they did notice, I would look just as bad.

Claire tangles her fingers into James's hair.

That is it. I do not need to watch this. I'm leaving.

I begin to march across the street, but I suppose my angry turn caught someone's attention, for the next thing I know, Claire is calling my name.

"Lily!"

I put the maniacal appearance back on and face them again. This time they are both looking at me. At least they were. The second I am facing them again, James becomes extremely interested in the sidewalk. Claire's face is flushed, but I highly doubt it's from embarrassment that I caught her kissing James.

"Oh, hey," I try to casually say while walking towards them. "I didn't see you guys there."

We all know it's a lie.

"Were you waiting for us for very long?" Claire asks, breathless.

Waiting for you to finish sucking faces? No, of course not!

"Nope." I smile. "I just came out here. The line was ridiculously long in the bathroom!" I force a laugh.

Claire laughs with me, but hers sounds genuine. "And you said your mum said it is okay for you to spend the night tonight, yeah?"

I totally forgot that Claire had asked me to sleep over at her house. I could say no… Wait—I Already told Claire yes. Bugger.

"Er, yeah," I say. "I just have to go get my stuff."

"Okay, we can all walk there, and then you and I can walk back to my house."

"Sounds great." I notice that while James has lifted his head off the ground, he has yet to look at my face.

The three of us turn to walk down the street when a body rams into James from behind. James knocks into my shoulder and I stumble, but I catch myself.

"What the-?"

I look up and see Nate standing in front of us, blonde girl with him. She has an upturned nose and a very low-cut white shirt on. I bet she has no problem with just "having some fun." Boy, he sure found a replacement fast.

I glower at Nate.

"Oops, didn't see you there," Nate sneers.

As he turns to walk away, James makes a swift motion to his pocket. A sliver of a thin piece of wood emerges before I am standing in front of him, hiding his wand from Claire's view.

"James!" I whisper-yell. He's angrily staring at Nate's retreating figure. "James!"

He finally looks at me, and I see his hazel eyes roaming my face. He hasn't put his wand away, but he hasn't taken it out any more.

"What…?" Claire says from beside us.

I glare at James. "Potter…"

His eyes stare into mine for a moment, trying to say something, and then he puts his wand away. I take a step back.

"What was that?" Claire looks very confused and a little bit miffed. I turn to face Claire again.

I look back at James. He gets to think of an excuse out of this, not me.

"Just had the urge to throw some coins at his head," he says.

That's the lie you come up with, James? You call yourself a freaking Marauder, lie all the time, sneak your way out of detentions, and you want to throw _coins_ at him? I mentally shake my head.

Claire does not look like she fully believes this answer, but she accepts it. "Okay…"

Just as I'm about to start talking about something, anything, James's arm makes a sudden movement. He pulls out his wand, flicks it at Nate, and then stashes it, right as Nate trips and falls on his face. A few people chuckle at the sight of a teenage boy with scraped hands practically kissing the concrete. The girl he is with sympathetically bends down to help him up. I can make out Nate's colorful swear words from here. Nate looks around and then back at us. Claire is one of those laughing, as well as James, but only for a moment. He catches me fiercely looking at him and sobers up. How dare he use magic on a Muggle? And all because the Muggle bumped into him?

James defiantly looks back. I wait for him to cave, to say sorry as James would, to go help Nate up, but he doesn't. Potter wins this round and chooses to stand there, staring at me. I guess he hasn't changed that much. I purse my lips and then angrily turn away from him.

I hear him splutter. I think my hair whipped him in the face. Good.

"Ugh, I still can't believe that guy," I say to Claire to change the subject.

"I know! Stupid prick. And that girl he was with? Please. You're, like, ten times prettier." Her amused smile changes to a reassuring one, and it oddly makes me feel better.

I smile back, a little less irritated with finding she and James kissing. Still irritated, but just a little less.

James, on the other hand, I ignore for the rest of the night.

* * *

><p>Claire had wanted to talk about James that night. A lot. While I was a bit bitter over my newfound third wheel-ness in addition what James had done, I still listened and participated. She had asked many questions about what James was like at school, and I had told her the truth without revealing the fact that he is a wizard and I am a witch.<p>

"He's brilliant in classes," I had said, "even though he doesn't even try. All he does is mess around. He and his friends get into tons of trouble as well, and they can rather be bullies, but they usually just do harmless pranks on people. James and his best mate, Sirius—"

"Sirius?" Claire had giggled. "That's a funny name."

"Agreed. Anyway, all the teachers and students cannot help but fawn over him and Sirius, especially the girls. They're alllll over them, even though they aren't really that great." I can't help but add my own thoughts.

Claire had gone quiet when I said this, and I realized what I had said a moment too late. "Oh—wait—I just meant—"

"It's okay." She had smiled. "Were there any girls he ever really liked or dated for a long time?"

My stomach had dropped when she said this. James had always proclaimed he liked me, but he was never serious about it. I decided against telling her.

"Not really. He did date this girl named Jessica for a few months before the school year was over, but he ended it. I wouldn't worry about it anyway." Then that had been the end of our conversation of James.

Now, as she lies in her bed and I lie atop some blankets on the floor, I cannot help but feel a little twinge in my stomach. I can't tell what it is from, though. It could be anger at seeing Claire and James start to kiss the second I leave, guilt at not telling Claire the total truth about James's past "feelings" for me, fury at James's response to Nate, or sadness at Petunia's continuing coldness. Maybe even surprise and confusion at seeing James and thinking "bloody handsome"…

"Lily?" a voice whispers.

"Yeah?" I whisper back. I thought Claire was asleep.

"I'm glad I came here and met you and James this summer."

"Me too," I say, rolling over onto my other side. "Me too…"

* * *

><p><strong>About time Petunia got here.<strong>

**Claire-haters...Don't hate me. It has to happen. But hey, I included some Lily realization in there!**

**Next update will be Sunday night at the latest, unless something completely unexpected and terrible happens. But I hope this made everyone else's Monday a little better. ;)**

**MG**


	11. The Cave

**The amazing award goes to: **

**Eleos, Rani Jashalithie, PoohBearGoesGangster (you cried? Oh no...I guess I'll just have to make more James/Lily moments. Hope your days got better. ;), Almost Genius, xjustarandomreaderx (yes, James and Nate are both stupid. Except Nate has no redeeming qualities whatsoever), El Leon Y La Oveja (see next A/N! because your completely right), PenguinBoxers, thebigestpotterfreak (yes, yes I am. feel no shame in correcting me. It will only make me better. :), ginnyweasleylover99, PenNameless1994, JPLE (I read Boyfriend waayyy before I even had an account, but I can hardly remember anything except that I loved it. I've been meaning to reread it...But it's nothing compared to mine, I know that! Also, I'm not entirely changing the A/Ns because you don't like them. I've ignored suggestions before, I just realized you were right. :), AriannaSaffyreMalfoy (wish I could go on vacay...have fun!), H.L.K. Masters (thanks! I didn't know that, so I'll fix it.), Sarahrules336, HurricaneK (you pay VERY close attention to details. major, major props to you. ;D), writergal24, wingswordsandmetaphors, Sammy-U, percabethshamus, yellow 14 (nah, couldnt hate you. thanks for the tip!), YoungAndLiving, Analie Janes (Thanks for the tip :), I-Siriusly-Love-Black (um...they are going to get together at the end of the summer/story because I'm not very good at writing their relationship and I don't think it's as exciting, SO, 9 more chapters? And yes, Sirius will be in, but not a whole lot:/) Night's Warrior (Lily is very stubborn and oblivious. But soon.) AcrossTheWater (doesn't James just seem like a Star Wars guy!), lilybethluna, and worldnerd12!**

**My American is also showing. Feel free to correct me and forgive my mistakes.**

**A lot of people wanting to slap James as well. James wants to have his cake and eat it too. My James is actually very quite good with the girls, but when it comes to Lily, he always says and does the wrong thing. He'll realize his pratness eventually. **

**I've had this idea in my head for a while, so... :)**

* * *

><p>I'm listening to the sound of my mum retching. It's past midnight and I was in bed, unable to sleep, when I first heard her.<p>

The sound isn't uncommon in this house, but I still haven't gotten used to it. It actually scares me. I know I should get up and check on her, maybe get her a wet cloth like she'd get me when I was little and sick, but I feel like my fear has paralyzed me.

I don't want to see Mum sick, and I certainly don't want to hear her get sick, yet I can't bring myself to get up and help her. Because deep down, I know I can't help her.

I can get her a cold glass of water, dampen a towel for her forehead, fluff her pillows, and then tuck her in her bed, but it wouldn't make any difference: She'd still be sick in the morning.

The medicine makes her sick. The first time I woke up to hear my mum retching, I was terrified. It was over the holidays and I hadn't known that it was a side effect of the medicine until my dad told me. And while I now know that it happens only a few times, I still feel just as scared as the first time.

I hear Mum get sick again, so I throw off my covers and get up. Just as I'm about to open my door, I hear my dad's soothing and sleepy voice.

"Amy?"

Dad's got her. She'll be okay.

I flop back down on my bed and listen. She doesn't get sick again, so I lie on my side and try to sleep, but I can't. I have too many thoughts running through my head.

An article in the _Prophet_ today announced that an English Muggle family was murdered. Aurors confirmed it was the Killing Curse.

I roll onto my other side and close my eyes.

Petunia's still being frigid around me. I thought that since this summer means more than the others she would've put her negative feelings aside. It was quickly proven that I was wrong.

I bury my face in my pillow and lie on my stomach, slowly breathing in and out.

Mr. McKinnon hasn't come back to tell James and I why the Death Eaters were here, and Mr. Potter hasn't heard anything about the situation. What's taking them so long to find it out? Or are they not telling us?

I lie on my back and watch my ceiling fan blur as it spins.

I haven't talked to James in two days. I still can't believe he used magic on Nate. Does this mean he hasn't changed at all?

I close my eyes and try to count dragons fly by.

I have no idea what I want to do after Hogwarts. I want to work in the wizarding world, but not many people are hiring Muggleborns, for fear of attack and losing their employees. I want to help defeat Voldemort, but I don't want to die. I want to stay with my family, but I'm afraid of putting them in danger.

I sit up and groan. I'm not going to be able to fall asleep.

Do I dare do it? My parents would kill me. And after what happened with Nate and the Death Eaters… But I can't stay in here; I feel like I'm suffocating. I'll only be out for thirty minutes at the most, and if anything, _anything_ happens I'll Disapparate, licensed or not.

I quickly grab my wand, jump out of bed, and change into shorts and a tank top. Then, ever so quietly, I open up the door to my balcony. I've never snuck out this way. I feel a wave of thrill and terror.

I hop up onto my ledge and sit with my feet dangling. I look down at the sand, almost sparkling in the darkness. Wand in my hand, spell at the ready, mouth closed tightly, I jump off the ledge. Before I touch the ground, however, I cast a silent Cushioning Charm and gracefully land on ground. At least more gracefully than what it would have been without magic.

I look around to make sure no one saw me jump before heading to my right down the beach.

I walk close enough to the water so the little waves can reach my feet. The cool water on my feet and the smell of the salt and sand soothe me.

I only just begin walking when I see a dark figure sitting on the beach. My heart beats faster, and while I know I should be turning around, I pull my wand out and silently walk towards the hunched figure. As I get closer, I tighten my grip around my only weapon. I expect the person to hear my footsteps and turn towards me, but the person is oblivious.

Only when I see the hair sticking up all over the place do I put my wand away. It's James. Looks like someone else is breaking the rules, too.

I walk towards him and he finally hears me. He swiftly whips his torso to the side, grabs his wand, and points it in my direction.

"Jeez, calm down," I say, holding my hands up. "It's just me."

"Evans?"

"Good guess," I sarcastically say. "What are you doing out here anyway?" I ask before sitting down in the sand next to him. My anger from the other night evaporates.

James sets his wand back down before answering. "Just needed to get out of the house. Needed somewhere to think. I usually fly around our manor or on the Quidditch Pitch to blow off some steam and think, but if I took my broom and started flying around, my dad would…" He shakes his head. "So here I am." He doesn't mention how my mum and dad would lock me in the house for the rest of the summer if they discover I was out here, so I don't mention how it's the same for him.

While I doubt he knows it, I'm having a deep internal struggle at his words. Just as my brain firmly says _No, he's fine without it, go by yourself, this is your place_, my mouth says, "I have a spot for you."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. And it's a big deal I'm showing it to you, so you're coming as a guest, which means you can't show anyone else, got it?"

James makes an exagerrated X over his heart, and I can tell he's mocking me. I give him The Glare.

"All right, fine. I won't. Promise," he says.

"Good," I say. I look around me. "Um, it's kind of a walk…"

"It's fine." James sounds very…subdued. And that's hardly ever a word that describes James.

I stand up and start walking towards where I was originally going. James stands, tucks his wand in his pocket, and follows beside me.

The only sounds I can hear are the waves crashing over one another, the sand crunching beneath our feet, and our steady breathing as we walk, but then my voice and James's voice ring out into the warm air at the same time.

"What do you-?"

"Look, I'm sorry—"

We both awkwardly laugh.

"Go ahead," I say.

"No, it's fine, you first."

"_Go_, James."

"Okay." He heavily breathes out and runs his fingers through his locks. "I was just going to say I'm sorry about the other night. I shouldn't have jinxed the git, since it wasn't a fair fight anyway. I guess…I guess I was still mad from what he did to you. I had a habit of hexing anyone that liked you back at school, and I s'pose some old feelings resurfaced."

My body gets rigid, but he continues speaking. "But don't worry: They mean nothing and it won't happen again."

James pushes his glasses back to the bridge of his nose. I uncomfortably scratch my arm. I had hoped we would never have to talk about his old "feelings" for me.

"It's…okay," I say.

Another silence.

"What were you going to say?" James asks.

"Oh, yeah. Can I ask you a question?"

"Shoot."

"What do you have to think about that you needed to be outside?" I'm genuinely curious. Whatever he has to think about has him so serious, it's almost unnerving. Plus, I don't want to talk anymore about…that stuff.

"Next," James says.

"What?"

"Ask me anything else but that."

"Anything?"

"Sure."

I'm embarrassed to say that after a moment of thought a question immediately rushes to my mind. I can feel my cheeks turn pink at the idea of asking it. Still, he did say anything…

What the heck.

"How many girls have you slept with?"

I swear James gags on the air and then almost trips over his own feet. I certainly didn't expect that kind of reaction from him. All too soon, however, he's smirking at me. "So that's the first place your mind goes, Evans? Well, I can't say I'm surprised. I _am_ wonderfully attractive." He winks at me.

I blush even harder, but I stand my ground. "No, I would just like to get the facts straight. You wouldn't believe the rumors I've heard." Marlene and I tend to be terrible gossipers together, and it's always been a mystery to us as to how many people Sirius and James have actually had sex with.

"Interesting," James says. "Care to tell me what kind of rumors there are?"

"Umm…" I try to recollect some of the wilder ones I've heard. "In your fourth year you shagged a seventh year Hufflepuff" –James's smirk gets wider—"on the Quidditch field. You saved Susie Wickham from an Acromantula in the Forbidden Forest, so then you both lost your virginity. Right there. In the forest. Filch caught you and Jessica in a broom closet, so you erased his memory and then locked him in the closet when you were done. You and—"

"All right, all right, I get the picture," James says.

I look over at him to see him looking more than a tad smug, but there's something else in his face.

"So really, you can't blame a girl for wanting to uncover the truth through all the nasty gossip," I tell him.

James clucks his tongue. "Evans, let's be honest here. We both know you just want to know the truth so that you'll know what you're up against when you realize your undying love for me."

"Oh, please."

While that statement might have been so infuriating at school he would have gotten a nice hex, now it was simply like an irksome fly I was determined to wave away.

James's grin fades just a bit. "None."

"Huh?"

"I've never shagged someone."

I look over at him to see that the grin is completely gone. "You're serious?"

"Yes, Evans," he says petulantly while running a hand through his hair. His face is pink. He's embarrassed? "Would you like me to announce it to the school?"

I feel a bit bad for not believing him, but really, who can blame me? People call him and Sirius the Sex Gods of Hogwarts. How was I supposed to know one of the Sex Gods has never had sex? He's certainly snogged plenty of people. And those were all openly and publicly.

"Then what's with all the rumors going around school?" I (hopefully politely) ask.

"Dunno, I guess all the girls dying to sleep with me made them up," he playfully says.

I roll my eyes, but James continues, serious once again. "I'm just waiting for the right bird, I suppose."

I'm too busy digesting this new piece of information to even attempt to end the silence. Who would've thought Potter would've been waiting for the right girl? Definitely not me.

"Now I get to ask you a question…," James says.

I gulp. After the kind of question I just asked him, I'm scared for what he'll ask me.

"How come you've never mentioned that you've come here for, like, ten years?"

I'm surprised that out of anything _this_ is what he chooses to ask me. "I have?" My roommates all claim that in the beginning of the new school year, this place and my summer is all I can talk about.

"No you haven't. I would've remembered.

"Maybe not to you, but Marlene, my roommates, my friends from other Houses, and even Remus all know."

"Oh. Right. We weren't actually friends before this, were we?" He sounds like his day (night?) just turned sour.

"No… My turn then?" I say, desperate for a change of conversation. I decide to ask a less serious question. "When did you first realize that you were a kid destined to prank others?"

James laughs. "When I was three and I stuffed my great grandma's cat into a vase."

"James!" I admonish, though I'm laughing as well.

"She went barmy. Started screaming that if I was that bad as a baby, I'd be awful as a teenager. All my dad did was laugh and say that he and my mum were prepared for anything and that if I was going to be a prankster, then so be it."

"That's terrible!" I say through my smile.

"I personally think it's a wonderful story," James says. "It should inspire many people."

I snort.

"Anyway, my turn, yeah?" He looks around as we walk, as if hoping a question will fall in front of him. It seems that one does, for the next second he's asking, "Why did you become friends with Sni—Snape?"

I sharply breathe in. Any other question would've been better than this one. But he was honest with me for the first one, so I decide to answer honestly too.

"We live in the same neighborhood. He told me I was a witch about a year and a half before I got my letter and visit. He told me all about Hogwarts and Dumbledore and Diagon Alley and practically everything else. We had been best friends ever since… He wasn't always this bad, you know," I say, almost pleading. "Believe me, he wasn't."

"I know," James says, but I can tell he doesn't.

Another silence.

"If you could do anything you wanted to after school, what would you do?"

James pauses for a moment before answering. "Part of me wants to play Quidditch or goof around or something," he slowly says. "But the other part of me wants to do something to get us out of this mess we're in. Even if it's dangerous."

Yet again, I feel shocked but also a little awed at his answer. "Like being an Auror?"

"Something like that, I don't know. Was Wes the first bloke you kissed?"

Wes was the first (and only) serious and lasting relationship I had, thanks to a certain raven-haired boy who scared away any potential boyfriends with threats; but he wasn't the only boy I've kissed. I don't know whether to be insulted or amused at the fact that James thinks so.

"Nope," I say. I don't elaborate.

"What?" he demands.

"I've kissed other guys."

"Guys! Who was the first?"

"That really doesn't matter, I mean—"

"Evans!"

"Fine, I was fifteen and there was a wizard who went to Durmstrang and he was staying here at the beach for a month. We kissed on the beach."

James makes a face. "We? So you kissed him back?"

I laugh. "Yeah, that's what usually happens when someone you like kisses you."

"He kissed you first?" he asks. He shouldn't care so much. I don't even think he could list all the girls he's kissed.

"Okay, I think you've used up your question space. It's my turn…" I try and think of a really interesting question. "What's the worst thing you've done?"

"Worst thing I've done as in rule breaking or worst thing I've done as in I've regretted?"

Huh. I hadn't ever really thought there was a difference. "Uh, which would you rather tell me?"

"I can't honestly tell you the biggest rule breaking thing I've done, even if I wanted to. And I'd prefer not to tell you the biggest thing I regret, so—"

"So what's the biggest thing you regret?"

James heaves an exasperated sigh. "Lily…"

My curiosity has peaked. "Come on, and then you can ask me anything you want to!"

"Anything?"

"Within reason."

James pulls out his wand and starts rotating it between his fingers. "The biggest thing I regret is being an arse all those years, hexing kids in the halls and showing off. It's one thing if it's a Slytherin, but for a while, it was anyone. I was pretty awful. And…asking you out all those times."

At first, I'm a bit surprised that James regrets being a bully and a prat. I never thought he would. Sure, he still messes with the Slytherins every once in a while but I never, ever thought he would feel bad over doing something like that. Regret just wasn't something James seems to feel.

Then my brows crinkle in confusion. Being honest, I'm a bit hurt at what he said. How much does a person have to dislike you to regret asking you out more than anything else in the world?

James must have seen my face, for he hurriedly adds, "Oh, Godric, no. Not like that! Shite, er, I meant because you, er, deserve better than how I had treated you. A lot better." He twirls his wand faster. "It made you hate me, too. And I got cursed by jinxes I didn't even know existed." He lamely chuckles.

"I don't hate you."

"But you did, didn't you?"

"Hate's a strong word."

"If I hadn't asked you out so many times and so publicly, would you have given me a chance?"

"James…"

"You said anything!"

"Within reason!"

"This is within reason!"

I sigh, knowing that I can't avoid the answer. "No. There were always other reasons."

"Oh," he says again. "What about-?"

"Look, we're here!" I exclaim, pointing at the rocks in front of us, thanking the stars for the diversion. Was he just about to ask me if I would have said yes now? Or something else equally as bad? What would I have said? Why does it seem like we always come back to this? Is there…is there _any_ chance he could've actually liked me, even just a little? He acted too happy for a bloke with no feelings the night I said we could be friends. So is there a possibility he really did fancy me?

Doubt it.

"This is it?" James asks as we walk closer. He sounds disappointed.

I look at the mass of stone in front of us. The brown rocks extend from the beginning of the beach (near all the sand dunes) into the water. The rocks have a decent spherical shape, like there's a massive cave just sitting on the beach. Which is exactly what it is.

The only way to get past the rocks/cave is to go around it. And you can't go around the front of it. If you stand back far enough and swim into the water, with just enough neck craning, you'll be able to see an entrance to the cave about the width of two house doors, but about the height of half a door.

If you look long enough, however, you'll also see the rocks in front of the entrance. Some are smooth, some are jagged; some you can only see in low tide, others are practically boulders in the water. And with the waves constantly moving, even if a person was barking enough to try and swim in that way, they'd end up being smashed into one of the rocks.

This cave is a definite no-no for people to go exploring in.

Jasmine and I never really listened to that rule last summer, though.

"So you just sit outside this rock and…think?" James asks.

"NO," I say. "Look." I lead him towards the back of the rocks, where the whole form is touching the sand and grass. Right before we reach the end though, I stop and turn to face the rocks.

"Here," I say, pointing at the rocks.

Hidden by little plants and the uneven shapes of the rocks is a tiny entrance into the cave.

I walk in first, crouching just a little, and say over my shoulder, "It's slippery. Watch your step."

Once I walk through the entrance, I'm in the cave. But then you turn around another corner and walk a bit. That's where the real spot is.

Around the corner, towards the edge of the cave, is a pool of green-blue ocean water. The pool is about five feet deep, and there's a little underpass that brings the water from the outside in. The moving green and blue water gives an eerie—yet calming—feeling throughout the cave.

I take my sandals off and sit on the edge of the pool, my feet gently swaying in the slowly stirring water. James sits down next to me, admiring the whole place.

"This is so cool. How'd you find it?"

"A girl named Jasmine and I found it last year. So far I don't know of anyone else who knows it. It's just me and Jasmine."

"And now me," James corrects me.

"And now you… Now swear you won't ever tell anyone about it!"

James rolls his eyes. "Come on, Lily—"

"Potter, I'm serious. You can't bring anyone else here."

"Why not?" he asks.

"Because it's my secret thinking spot. You had needed a place to think, so I brought you here. A decision I'm quickly beginning to regret."

"Ouch, Evans," James jokingly says before nudging my shoulder with his.

I try to hide it, but I know James sees the grin on my face. He smiles back at me, his teeth pearly white in the dark, his glasses slightly crooked.

I stand up. "Well, like I said, you can use it any time you need a place to escape."

"Thanks, Lily." James smiles an authentic smile and, even though I didn't think it was possible, his eyes seem to twinkle even more.

I get an odd feeling in my stomach, so I say, "Anyway, I'm just going to go now…"

"Hold on," James says. "What were you doing out here? Before?"

"Er, coming down here actually. I couldn't sleep and I just needed a place to think and escape as well."

"What did you need to think about?" James inquires.

"Umm…" Knowing he won't tell me (but desperately wishing he will), I say, "You tell me what you had to think about, and I'll tell you what I had to."

He shrugs his shoulders. "Fair enough."

I walk away.

"Where are you going?" James calls after me. I turn around.

"Home. I'll let you think. We all know that doesn't happen very often," I say solemnly.

"Ha, ha. Very funny. You can stay if you want."

"Oh, no, it's fine. I'm getting tired anyway."

"Come on. Stay. Please," James practically begs, but it isn't playful or flirty, it's serious…but almost wary for the answer. As if he's afraid I'm going to tell him no again.

For reasons unbeknownst to me, I walk back and sit next to James. Neither one of us speak, instead choosing to let our feet drift in the small current and our minds wander.

My body feels heavy, so I lie down on my back with my feet still in the water. It's uncomfortable, but I'm too tired to care. I try to relax, and I eventually hear and feel James lie back in the same position.

My brain jumps from one thought to the next. The general thought pattern goes a little something like: Mum, school, Voldemort, James, Petunia, Death Eaters, life, Dad, Mum, James, school, Mum, James.

I'm surprised my mind keeps going back to James, but I can't help and feel that there's something off with him. Something that I'm not going to like when I find out what it is.

Out here, my thoughts and worries feel like they're on a broader scale, but minimized at the same time. After a few minutes, I close my eyes and give up on thinking, only focusing on listening to the waves and the feel of the water on my toes.

My eyelids have sufficiently drooped and feel like they have bricks keeping them down when I hear, "Lily?"

"Mmm?"

"How long are we going to stay here?"

I vaguely register that James sounds much more awake than me, who wants nothing more than to fall asleep.

"Forever…," I murmur. I roll over and curl up into a ball, my back towards James.

"Sounds good," he says.

I'm a centimeter from sleep when my brain finally catches up and realizes what I've said. And what I've said isn't a very good thing to tell a boy—tired or not. I roll back over so that I'm facing James.

"James—wait—I—"

I stop talking when I see him. He's sleeping. He looks so…relaxed…and little. Like a little boy who's finally fallen asleep after a long day.

"G'night, James," I mutter and close my eyes, deciding that I'll just sleep for ten minutes before going back home.

A voice in my head that suspiciously sounds like my mum is screaming at me that I'm forbidden from being out after eleven and falling asleep with a boy while no one knows where I am is a very bad idea.

I ignore the voice and instead choose to listen to the ocean and the deep, slow breathing beside me.

And then I fall asleep in a cave with James Potter.

* * *

><p><strong>Well...yeah. <strong>

**Okay, in my mind the cave looks like that cave from that old tv show on TeenNick called H20. Anyone know what I'm talking about? **

**Also, does anyone feel that I should have recaps before the chapters? I feel like I update regularly enough that I'm good without them, but does anyone disagree?**

**OH. And I was looking on people's tumblrs and stuff, and found a page on Snape vs. James. I'm going to go ahead and assume you all are James/Lily fans, so how do you feel about Snape? I think he's obviously very, very brave, but it doesn't matter because he was who he was and Lily was meant to be with James. I do feel very bad for him, but I almost think that Snape and Lily still wouldnt have worked out, even if he hadn't called her a mudblood. So I feel very sad for Snape and do like reading stories that give more insights into Snape's life, but I am James and Lily all the way. **

**I actually really like this chapter. :)**

**Thought? Opinions? Predictions? Hopes? Lemme know. :)**

**Until next week,**

**MG**


	12. Questions and Answers

**Thanks to... VoldemortHugger, Nightlight753, Eleos, Almost Genius, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, Sammy-U, Those Maraduers, lifeanddeathmade, HurricaneK (3/4 of what you want is in the next one!), BlindMindLover, lilybethluna (yes! you'll find out very soon...), mee, JackieMooneyLestrange, writergal24, PoohBearGoesGangster (true, but at the same time, how people live affects them, but everyone has challenges they have to overcome without turning evil and bad, anyway thanks for your review on my other story, Reunion!), wingswordsandmetaphors, So 'blank' killed 'blank. Fin, I3Toothpaste (good point, but he also was mean and vindictive to Neville and Hermione throughout all of their schooling, and they had nothing to do with Snape.), PenguinBoxers, TyemMarodyor, El Leon Y La Oveja, PenNameless1994, Gray Fedora (LOVE Alan Rickman!), DanceDiva (thanks! :D), AriannaSaffyreMalfoy, yellow 14, ClimbingMonkey13, percabethshamus, Kenzieloveify, Super Cara (I read somewhere that Sirius moved in with the Potters summer before his 6th year, but then he inherited A LOT of money from his uncle, so he bought his own place 7th year. Anyway, if thats not true, thats how it is in this story, even if thats slightly AU. :), JuJu Kitten, Starkidpotter13, YoungAndLiving, NegligibleNaina (hahahaha), Rani Jashalithie, Nobody u know, Sarahrules336, ilovemybestfriends (good guesses ;D), youawitchornot (no, no tumblr. :/ I usually update every Sunday though!), and zatl. **

**Longer A/N at the bottom.**

* * *

><p><em>I have to tell my parents we need to turn the heat up in this house. And where did my blankets go? <em>

I blindly turn to lie on my other side while simultaneously reaching out to find my blankets. It's bloody freezing in my room.

My fist connects with something and I pull it towards me, but when I realize my blanket is stuck on the other side, I move closer to it. I try to curl up into a ball for warmth, but the action is unnecessary because a small wave immediately comes up over the ledge and water splashes on my legs. I sit up with a jolt and find that I had just tried to curl in a ball while holding onto the back of James's shirt.

I look around. I can see sunlight coming through the little bit of space in the opening to the pool.

"Oh, SHIT!" I shout.

It's morning. I was here last night. I snuck out after not being able to sleep. I found James. I brought him to my cave. I fell asleep in said cave. WITH JAMES. And no one knows where I am. I broke my parents' rules. They're going to kill me.

How could I have possibly been so dim, so stupid, so idiotic?

"Bugger, bugger, bugger," I say, scrambling to my feet. I find my sandals and try to put them on.

I have that panicky feeling as if I got drunk on Firewhiskey the night before and am now waking unable to remember the night before. Not that I would know the feeling. Really, though, the things people do at Hogwarts…

I sit back down on the ground, successfully put on one shoe, and then hit James on the back with the other.

"Ungh," he grunts before turning to face me, still asleep.

"Get up, James!" I yell.

He ignores me.

"James, get up!"

He slowly opens his eyes and looks at me. He lazily smiles. "Morning." He says it as if we wake up next to each other every morning. He closes his eyes again. His hand casually rests on my leg.

I thump him on the head, which successfully gets his attention.

He glowers at me while rubbing his head with that hand that was on my leg. "What was that for?"

"We slept in a cave!" I holler. "Why didn't you wake me up?"

"Me?" James shouts back. "Why me?"

"Because you're the bloke!"

"You're the one who fell asleep first!"

"You were, Potter! Now my parents are probably freaking out trying to find me and when I get home, they're going to murder me! MURDER ME! You might as well Avada Kedavra me now, Potter, because I'm telling you, they will be furious!"

James looks at his watch, groans, and then flops back down and closes his eyes. I have the inane urge to kick him in his side.

"What are you doing?" I try to calmly say although I feel like I'm about to breathe out fire.

"It's barely past five in the morning, Lily. I doubt your parents are up yet."

"Five? What?" I grab his wrist and jerk the watch towards my face to see it, ignoring his voice of pain. He's right: It's not even five thirty yet. My parents are definitely not up.

"Oh. Right. Well, then"—I kindly and gently set his wrist down on his stomach—"you can go back to sleep, James, I'm just going to go back to my house…"

James groans again and sits up. His inky black hair looks atrocious; I've never seen a head of hair so messy before. "I'll go with you. That was not a good night's sleep."

I agree.

"I mean, when you weren't lying all over my chest and tangling your legs with mine…," James says.

Oh. My. Merlin.

I didn't…No… My face flares up like a red firework.

I look at James's face. He's smirking, but he looks confident in what he is saying.

What _else_ did I do?

James continues talking. "And then you declared your love for me and told me to snog you senseless right there, and I said, 'Now, Evans…'"

He's definitely smirking now, and while he still looks confident, I can see a mischievous glint in his eyes that tells me he's lying.

That GIT!

"I did not!" I exclaim. James laughs. I hit him.

"Ow!"

I hit him again. "You prat! I thought you were serious!"

James is still laughing when I step away from him and give him the meanest look I can muster.

"I'm leaving," I say.

Right before I exit the cave, James says, "But you know what this means, Evans? We've officially slept together now. I've always said you wouldn't be able to resist my charm and good looks forever." I swear I've never seen a bigger grin on that boy's face.

"Shush, Potter!" I cry out before dramatically exiting the cave.

_I hate that boy._

* * *

><p>I slowly walk into my house and begin to shut the door behind me, feeling like a criminal. I hear the click of the door that means it is closed all the way, and I pause for a moment, straining to hear any sound of my parents upstairs. I don't. I breathe a sigh of relief.<p>

I turn around, but when I see a blonde standing behind me with a stony expression, I involuntarily shriek. I quickly clap my hands over my mouth, though.

"Good God, Petunia," I curse. "Don't try and give me a heart attack or anything." She's in her nightgown with a bathrobe over it, a cup of coffee in her hands. Her fingers are wrapped tightly around the mug, and I fear that any second the glass will simply shatter from her unyielding grip.

"What were you doing?" she says, ignoring my comment. Like usual.

Bugger. "Oh, uh, I just couldn't sleep. So I fancied a walk. You know, wanted to see the sunrise and all. What are you doing up so early?" I say with a smile. Please drop it, please drop it, please—

"Don't try and avoid my question, Lily. I just saw you walking back with that other freak from across the street. You were out with him."

"Don't be dramatic, Petunia. We just ran into each other and—"

"So why do you have sand in your hair and on your back?"

My hand involuntarily reaches up to my hair and runs through my tangled locks. Sure enough, a few grains of sand fall onto the ground, and I know she's telling the truth when she says I have sand on the back of my clothes. I had tried to get most of it off, but I suppose I wasn't very successful.

"I tripped," I lie.

Petunia just stares at me. I stare back, attempting to stem all emotions. She eventually stiffly turns around and walks into the kitchen. I breathe a sigh of relief. She's letting it go.

"Have fun when you get pregnant," she says from the kitchen.

I gasp. Did she just say that? Did she really just say that?

I follow her into the kitchen. "What did you say, Petunia?"

"All I said," she evenly replies, "is to have fun when you get pregnant. If you want to go skipping around and sneak out late at night, which, by the way, I know you're forbidden to do, and go be some tart that sleeps with the neighborhood boy on the beach, then go right ahead."

"Petunia! You know I'm not like that!"

"I know Mum and Dad raised us to not be like that, but I also know that ever since you went to that school, you're practically not even part of our family anymore. It wouldn't surprise me if all you did at that school was meet up with boys and have-"

"Stop it!" I say as violently as I can while still whispering. "Just stop it, Petunia!" She gets quiet. "I am a part of this family, whether you like it or not."

She blinks. I'm dying to say it. I've never said it to her before. I have to say it. I know I shouldn't, but I'm so angry all I can think is that if I don't say it, she'll walk over me forever. But if I do say it, I'll regret it. I say it anyway.

"If you had gotten the letter, you wouldn't be like this! You wouldn't think magic was bad or witches and wizards are freaks. I don't know why I got to go to Hogwarts and you didn't, and I'm sorry you didn't get to go with me, but I wanted you to! I'm sorry you're angry, and I'm sorry that I left to go to school, but you don't get to make me out to be some slaggish freak because of something I can't control!"

Petunia's face is bright red, and I can see her reaching forward to slap me any moment. But she doesn't. She stares. And stares. Then she throws her cup into the sink a meter away. I hear a crack and some of the brown liquid sloshes out. I'm sure the mug broke.

"I hate you," she says to me, all emotion drained from her.

At that moment, I want to take my words back. I want to swallow them and just let her think that I was some slag with James last night. It'd be better than saying what I had said. She's never going to forgive me now.

"Petunia, I—"

"Don't talk to me," she snaps. "I don't care about your stupid school and your dumb magic. I don't even know why I wrote to that old man, asking to go. I was young and naïve. But I'm glad I'm normal. I'm glad that you're going back to that school and moving out. I don't care what you do, or whom you do it with. I'm not even going to tell Mum and Dad that you snuck out. I just don't care." What she says hurts me. I barely notice her bottom lip quivering, though. Barely. I still notice it. I just ignore it.

"Fine," I say. I don't know what else to say. My anger is flaring again, and I can't bring myself to even try and fix this. Petunia won't listen to reason, anyway. I'll be surprised if she ever listens to me again. "And even though you don't care, I'm not shagging James. We're just friends."

Then I leave the kitchen before my relationship with my sister becomes any more damaged. If that's even possible.

* * *

><p>Not even two days after I had fallen asleep in that cave with James, he calls to tell me that Mr. McKinnon is at his house and I should get over there now.<p>

I quickly find my mum and tell her I'm going to James's house and why, but she insists on coming along. I agree without an argument, but only because I want to get over there faster.

James leads my mum and me inside to the seashell living room where Mr. McKinnon, Mr., and Mrs. Potter are waiting. Mr. and Mrs. Potter are both sitting in separate chairs while Mr. McKinnon is standing and looking at the seashells lined up on a shelf. James sits on the couch and I sit next to him. Mr. Potter offers his chair to mum, but she declines and chooses to stand beside the couch.

"Hi, Mr. McKinnon," I say when he smiles at my mum and me.

"Hi, Lily." When everyone is situated, he says, "Sorry it's taken so long. We've got Death Eater suspects, killings, missing witches and wizards, a decline in Aurors…" He rubs his forehead tiredly. "There's just a lot of stuff, and I hate to say that these two Death Eaters weren't really at the top of the To Do list."

I nod almost automatically, but I can tell no one else really likes hearing that. I don't either. All they had to do was question the stupid men. Why would it take so long?

"Anyway, we still didn't figure out much. We know who they are, Antonin Dolohov and Quincy Selwyn." I almost laugh at the second name. It sounds next to impossible for a Quincy to be evil.

"The only thing we could get out of them was that they were ordered to look for a cave that's somewhere on the coast line. That's all they knew. They didn't know what it was for, why it was needed, or how important it was. They didn't even know if it was even in this area, all they knew was that the cave they were looking for was on England's shores."

I stop breathing and look at James. His hazel eyes are wide with shock. In that moment, I feel frightened. We had both just fallen asleep in a cave, defenseless and alone, while Death Eaters are looking for something exactly like that location. Why would I do something like that? Why would I even sneak out? Sometimes, my own stupidity astounds me.

"If we find out why—"Mr. McKinnon and the parents see the look James and I exchanged and the current looks on each of our faces. "Do you two know something I should know?"

The room is silent.

"Er," I finally say, "there is a cave…down the beach…that way." I point in the general direction. "There's nothing special about it, though. It's just a cave."

"When were you last there?" Mr. McKinnon says in a business-like voice.

This time James answers. "Two days ago. Lily showed it to me one afternoon." We look at each other out of the corner of our eyes. Petunia had meant what she had said and never breathed a word of catching me coming in that early morning. Petunia hasn't actually spoken a word to me since that morning. However, since my parents don't know I snuck out, Mum doesn't contradict this statement at all. In fact, she believes it. I feel a ball of guilt form in my stomach.

"How do you get there?"

"It's a bunch of rocks on the beach," I say. "Like a huge boulder. There's an entranceway on the side near the back, it's kind of hidden, but if you find it, you can get in."

Mr. McKinnon nods seriously.

"We could show it to you if you'd like."

"How did you find this, Lily?" my mum sternly asks.

"I found it last summer, Mum, with Jasmine." Oh, for the love of Merlin, she can't really be upset with me over finding a cave a year ago. She's not going to give me another rule is she? One that I would probably stupidly end up breaking…

"Okay," the Auror says. "Stay away from that cave and I'll get someone to check it out. Always be with someone and have your wand with you, and you all should be fine." Mr. McKinnon gets up to leave.

"That's it?" James says. "You don't know anything else?"

Here we go again…

"No, son, we don't. We know that You-Know-Who was or is trying to find a cave. That's all we know, and at this moment, with no clue as to where the cave is, what he will need it for, or whether he has already found it, it's not top priority."

"But—"

"We know that You-Know-Who is recruiting people. We know that he is targeting important wizards. We know he wants to attack Muggles and Muggleborns. And we know he wants to find a cave somewhere in England. The Aurors can prevent attacks and prevent him from gaining power, but there's simply no way we can put a guard on every cave in the country. There's nothing we can do."

"But—"

It's not Mr. McKinnon that interrupts James this time but Mr. Potter. "There are other things they have to do, James. Drop it." He gives a stern look to his son, and James's eyes fall to the carpet.

"Mr. McKinnon," I say, "what's going to happen to the Death Eaters? Dolohov and Quincy?"

Mr. McKinnon's facial expression tells me that he was hoping this question would never come up. He sucks in his cheeks and then blows air out of his mouth. "More than likely they're going to be tried and arrested."

"More than likely? You mean they could be freed?"

"The thing is, Lily, that while they did follow you, they didn't actually attack you or James. The only thing they did when they were here was cast a single spell. They're also fairly new Death Eaters, which is why we're assuming they were given a simple task of finding a cave, so unlike the others, they don't have a list of crimes to their name. They're also claiming to be under the Imperius Curse. You know what that is?" I nod. "So there's a possibility nothing could happen."

"But you just said they're Death Eaters!"

"Yes, I know that, you know that, the ones on this case know that. Both of them also come from pureblood families, and I hate to say it, but they have plenty of influential relatives in the Ministry. There's a possibility they could be released because there's not substantial proof."

"What? That makes as much sense as a cup of tea leaves!" James interjects.

"I agree," Mr. McKinnon says, "but that's the way it is. The possibility they will be taken to Azkaban is likely, but there is a possibility that they could get off. Just remember that."

"They were threatening Lily!" James declares. "They implied they were going to rape her! Does that mean anything? They're sodding Death Eaters; you can't possibly let them go out and be jolly again and have a laugh with a psychopathic murderer on how they outsmarted the Ministry!"

"You can't arrest anyone based on what they said, James. Haven't you said plenty of things that you didn't actually mean?"

James gets quiet for a moment, and I know Mr. McKinnon has a point. Then James opens his mouth again, and I know he's not going to accept this as easily.

"But—"

"I'll talk to David about it later, James," Mr. Potter says, cutting off James once again. "However, I'm sure he has to get back to work."

Mr. McKinnon gratefully nods at Mr. Potter, says a goodbye to us all, and then Disapparates. The living room is silent. I feel dizzy. Why is it getting harder to breathe? Am I hyperventilating? Oh, Merlin, don't let me pass out on the Potters' living room floor.

I walk over and sit on the couch.

"Well," Mrs. Potter finally says, "that wasn't what we were hoping to hear, but"—James snorts. Mrs. Potter ignores him—"it could be worse."

All of us look at her incredulously, except my mum, who has a blank expression on her face. I'm sure she has no idea what to think, and I don't blame her. I can hardly think properly now.

"From now on," James's mum continues, "you two are not allowed anywhere near that cave."

James and I solemnly nod.

"Forbidden," Mr. Potter says with a stern and knowing glance at James. I think he knows James hasn't exactly followed the rules. Just as long as he doesn't know I've been disobeying—

Mr. Potter's eyes—so like James's—meet me with the same expression, and I know that he definitely knows something. For an old man, he's quite intuitive. But I don't need intuitive; I need secretive! Especially from my mother!

I cast my eyes down to the floor.

"Would you like some tea, Amy?" Mrs. Potter asks Mum.

Mum looks a bit startled. "Oh, that would be lovely, but—"

"Have some tea. We can talk." Mum nods and goes into the kitchen with Mr. and Mrs. Potter.

It must have been code for something along the lines of 'Don't-be-scared-even-though-there's-a-terrible-bastard-out-there-wanting-to-kill-or-enslave-people-like-your-daughter-because-I-will-talk-with-you-and-everything-will-make-more-sense-and-hopefully-bring-comfort-to-your-worried-self.' But who knows? It could have really just meant 'Have some tea so we can talk.' God, I hope Mrs. Potter reassures Mum, though.

"Evans?" James says now that we're alone in his living room. "You okay?"

I nod.

"Want to go do something?"

I shake my head.

"And you're sure you're okay?"

I nod.

James pauses. "…Do I need to get your mum?"

"No," I say. "I don't feel good, that's all. I'm going to go on home. Tell my mother for me, yeah?"

"Okay, but are you sure-?"

I nod.

When I'm in my bedroom again, after having practically floated from the Potters', I gently sit on my bed and try to breathe evenly. I don't know why it happens now. It should have happened after I read the Daily Prophet one day. Or perhaps after Death Eaters followed me. Not now, though. Not after I learn that he's looking for a cave. Because, really, why should I be having a breakdown?

Because I'm scared, I think. And now it's real. I don't know why it wasn't real when Marlene wrote to tell me about Richard Foxworth's parents being killed by Death Eaters and that he wasn't coming back to school because he had to take care of his four younger siblings. I don't know why it wasn't real when I was hiding behind a rubbish bin thinking that I was either going to be kidnapped or killed. It's real now, though.

I start to pace the length of my room, but then I stop. I need to do something with my hands; I pull out a piece of parchment and a pen. I begin to write.

_I don't know why he would need a cave. Is it so he can hide in it? Does it hold a magical weapon? Will it be a torture chamber, a prison for his enemies? Will the Aurors and the Ministry ever be able to stop him? Will he win?_

_Is Vold—Merlin, look, my hand even begins shaking just when I try to write his name. No, I will not be one of those people who cower at his name. I will not be scared of Voldemort._

_But I am. Holy hippogriffs, I am. I just won't let it stop me now. I didn't want to get in his way before. Of course I wanted to prevent this war. (Or would it be 'end it'? Is it really a war now?) I just didn't want to risk anything. Not my life, not my parents' lives, not Petunia's, not my friends… I wanted to have a fun job. One of those magical ones I would think of when I was eleven. Something silly, utterly ridiculous. I didn't want to deal with death and evil. Who would?_

_But when Mr. McKinnon told us that Voldemort was looking for a cave and those blokes thought that the cave could be here, all I saw was a dead James, lying in that cave. Then I saw Mary, Anita, Josiah, Henry, Yvonne, Teresa, Uric, and sweet little Evangeline, just some of the Muggleborns in my House. They were tied up, beaten, and scared, watching a terrible, horrible, evil man walk around. He wouldn't admire the mysteriousness or beauty of the cave. No, he would only see it as something else to help him obtain his wicked goals. _

_This entire gruesome scene flashed into my mind in one second, but it was enough. It was scary and frightening and the remembrance of it makes me want to do something. Gone is the idea of hiding behind the lines and hopefully doing something to help. I still don't know what I want to do, but I know that I'm going to do something. There's got to be a reason I was in Gryffindor. It wasn't so that I could hide, cower, and skirt around the issue of Voldemort. I'm at the top of my class, and I won't let my powers go to waste. _

_I don't know what's going to happen now, but I know that when school's over my life will consist of trying to bring him down. That image is forever etched into my mind, and I'll make sure nothing like that comes true. _

_Because I'm a Gryffindor and no longer scared. _

_And because Voldemort is looking for a cave._

_And for whatever reason he's looking for that cave, he can't find it, and he can't get more power._

_Voldemort needs to find a cave. I need to do whatever I can to stop him._

It started out as a letter to Marlene, but it finished as a sort of promise to myself. I read it over one more time, and a sense of determination and calming crawls over me. I walk across my room to find the cherry wood jewelry box my dad bought for me when I was six. I don't use it for jewelry, though. Instead, I put all things valuable to me in it. I open the box at the top lies a Muggle photograph of my family at the beach house before I got my letter to Hogwarts, a wizard picture of me and Marlene in Hogsmeade, and a perfect silver-blue stone Severus found and gave to me when we were ten. I vaguely think that perhaps I should take the stone out, but altogether ignore the objects as I fold the parchment into a tiny square. I place the paper in my jewelry box, vowing to read it whenever I feel scared or unsure, and then close the box with a quiet _thump_.

* * *

><p><strong>Where to begin?<strong>

**Sorry it took so long. Don't hate me. This chapter gave me more trouble than any other, ever. And sometimes I'll hold a chapter until Sunday, only because it gives me more time to edit, I like being consistent, and I'm a freak like that. This one, however, I posted as soon as I finished writing/editing it. A Petunia scene was also suggested by HurricaneK, although I bet that's not how she figured it would be, but mucho gracias to her for recommending bringing in some sister interaction. **

**Okay, to the cave thing...This is how I figured it, though Lily doesn't know any of this: Voldemort went to the cave when he was about 8/9? It was a random field trip, one they probably went to only once, and it's been almost 40 yrs since the incident. I doubt he remembers exactly where the cave was, only that it was on the shore, as it was also away from the town they actually went to. Voldemort wouldn't be strolling around, looking for a cave, so he'd make his brand new DEs do it. And if he already made the Horcrux, he just hadn't put it in the cave yet, because he didn't put it in the cave until whatever amount of time when Kreacher went with him, I'm assuming a little while after this. Thus, no cave. If it has to be a tad AU, so be it.**

**I'm reeeeaaaaaallllllyyyy nervous about this chapter. Please, please review honestly.**

**As an apology for a ridiculously long wait, early update because the next chapter is mostly written (;P). It will contain no Claire, and reveal some stuff about James.**

**See you soon,**

**MG**


	13. Understanding

**Happy 11/11/11 everyone! Make sure to make a wish at 11:11. ;)**

**Thanks tooo... YoungAndLiving, .113, percabethshamus, MaryOlivia, Emullz (hahaha, yes, Marlene will come in), youawitchornot, MrsPotato100, PenguinBoxers, SuperCara (haha, at this point, they are friends!), DanceDiva (see A/N below...), writergal24, lilybethluna, MedzR3, AcrosstheWater (see A/N below...), summertimewriter, Sarahrules336, HurricaneK (Don't worry, I read ALL of your review. Like, three times. Ha. Not Noah, Nate. Thanks for pointing out the chair thing. It's really unnecessary, so, you know, thanks. And the Petunia scene I could see it going 32049832432 different ways, but, oh well. Always appreciate the constructive criticism :), ClimbingMonkey13, AriannaSaffyreMalfoy, Sammy-U, BlindMindLover, SpencerReidFan89, sin alma, PoohBearGoesGangster (*gasp!* I would never stop this story! Unless something went terribly, terribly wrong. Even then, I wouldn't stop it. Snape was never evil, no, but he was mean and vindictive.), I-Siriusly-Love-Black, Nightlight753, Starkidpotter13, and zatl. **

**Someone's going to hate me, but I don't want there to be any mistakes. The cave James and Lily were in is NOT the cave in Half-Blood Prince where DUmbledore and Harry found the locket. The Death Eaters are looking for that cave and it's somewhere around there. James and Lily just happen to know a cave, so they are freaked out thinking the cave the Voldemort is looking for is that one, but it's NOT. The cave is around there, though. I tried to make it clear that they were two different caves with the initial description of the cave, but...I guess I didn't do a good job. Sorry for any confusion. :/**

* * *

><p>Over the next two weeks, I spend my days with Claire, James, or my family.<p>

It's usually the same thing with Claire and James, although I hardly get tired of it. Claire and I have about two sleepovers a week, so if Claire didn't spend the night at my house or vice versa, then James and I will meet up before we head to Claire's. Usually I end up getting James, because that boy will sleep until two in the afternoon if someone will let him.

The three of us will then go to the beach, go to the cinema, walk through town, or hang out at Claire's house. (James's house has not been Muggle-proofed, and now that Petunia knows James is a wizard, she isn't too happy to see him. Or me for that matter.)

Claire says she and James are official, although I don't know what really makes them official. I highly doubt James looked deep into Claire's eyes, proclaimed his love for her, and then asked her to be his girlfriend. But they are more than friends, that's for sure. They'll go out just the two of them, before which Claire always asks me to help her pick out what she is going to wear. They also snog. They snog quite a bit from what I hear, but never around me anymore.

I don't know whether it was Claire, James, or perhaps both of them that picked up on my irritation about it, but when it's the three of us, they don't do anything to make me feel like a third wheel. It'll just feel like three mates hanging out. Which is good, I suppose.

The three of us aren't always together, though. Claire still has to help in her family's restaurant a lot; she'll do anything from waitressing, to seating people, to keeping her brother and sister out of her parents' way.

James also spends an increasing amount of time with his mum and dad. The three of them are often out on the beach or in town going out to eat. James says sometimes they even go to Diagon Alley or go do wizard things. I know they once went to a professional Quidditch game; Chudley Cannons versus James's favorite team, Puddlemere United. When Mrs. Potter said that they were there for family time, she was serious.

Like James, I spend time with my family as well. It's summer tradition that I help Mum cook dinner, so I always talk with her while we cook. Typically I'm the one talking when I tell her about Claire and James, Marlene and her busy internship, or my homework I've yet to make a dent in. My mum always listens, though; even if I've said basically the same thing the evening before.

Dad still has to go away for work a few days a week, but he's here at the beach house more often than he's been in the past; I expect it's because of Mum. Dad, Petunia, and I always sit down to watch Dad's favorite detective program every Sunday. He also cons Petunia and I into starting a new puzzle with him. He has about thirty puzzles; each one usually averages about one thousand pieces. I personally can't stand doing puzzles, but my dad loves them, so I'll finish a couple with him every summer.

Petunia seems to have decided to forget about our disastrous encounter, for which I'm grateful because every time I think of it I get a sick feeling in my stomach. When it's the two of us, she simply ignores me again, only making conversation when necessary. Whenever we go out with our parents, we're perfectly polite to one another. I don't mention Hogwarts, she doesn't call me a freak, and our mum and dad are happy. It's a win-win-win situation. Except it doesn't feel like it.

When James and I are with Claire, Mr. and Mrs. Potter are with my mum and dad. Mum and Mrs. Potter have become such good friends that the Potters invited us over for dinner to celebrate. We're not celebrating a birthday or a promotion, but rather the fact that my mum has successfully taught Mrs. Potter how to cook the good old Muggle way. Believe me: a pureblood witch being able to cook a meal without magic is something to celebrate.

We're standing in the Potters' entrance hall, my mum chatting with Mrs. Potter, my dad with Mr. Potter, James seemingly absent, when Mr. Potter turns to me and says, "You can go upstairs and get James out of his room, Lily. Merlin knows what he's doing now." He smiles at me, and I wonder if James is going to look like that decades from now. I look at Mr. Potter again and decide that the possibility is very big.

"Okay," I reply.

I hurry up the stairs and walk down the hall towards James's room. I raise my fist to the closed door, but pause when I hear him talking.

"No, I know it's coming up. I told you I'd get away. I did last time, I'll do it again. "

A deep voice mutters something I can't quite hear before James speaks again.

"Mum doesn't know so she's got no idea how important it is. She won't let me leave cause of the Death Eaters, but mostly my dad. And it's not like I can tell my dying dad I fancy a night out with the boys, so I'll see him soon," he bitterly says.

I feel my head start to spin. Mr. Potter's…dying? But he can't be…. He's been fine…

But even as I think it, images flash in my mind: Mrs. Potter saying they wanted family time; Mr. Potter coughing into a hanky; James worriedly asking his dad if he's okay; Mr. Potter wheezing after hollering for James… It takes a moment for me to regain my composure and attempt to listen to James again. This time I press my ear against the door.

"…ever. Look I'll meet you guys at the usual spot. Tell Moony and Wormtail, too. I've got to go, though. Mum invited Lily and her family over for dinner."

Someone definitely responds, but no matter how hard I press my ear to the door, I can't make out what he is saying.

"Shut up, Padfoot," James says.

The second voice, which I'm assuming to be Sirius because of the ludicrous nickname, says something again. He talks for much longer than he previously had, and I can catch a few words. However, the little words I can catch ("Don't," "bird," "up," "unicorns," "try," "first year Hufflepuff") make no sense together.

"Yeah, I know," James grumbles. "I'll talk to you later, Padfoot."

Foolishly, I press my face even harder against the door trying to hear Sirius's response. It's only when I hear footsteps coming towards me do I realize that James is going to open the door any second.

I quickly look around for an open room to hide into, but just as I turn towards the bathroom, James's door opens behind me.

"Lily?"

I debate whether I should face James or just run away and pretend I didn't hear a thing.

"…_my dying dad…"_

Nope, there's no choice of forgetting this.

I turn back around and look at James. "Hi."

James looks suspicious. "How long were you standing out here for?"

"Me? Not very long, not at all. Your dad" –My heart breaks a little at the thought of Mr. Potter—"told me to come up here and get you when my parents and I arrived."

"The doorbell rang over two minutes ago."

"Did—did it now? Oh, funny, time flies when you're—"

"Eavesdropping?" James sounds mad.

I guiltily look at the floor. "Okay, I heard." I look up at James. "I didn't mean to listen, I just wanted to know who you were talking to you and then you said…" I can't bring myself to finish the sentence. I hope I just misunderstood.

"That my dad's dying?" James guesses, and his voice is like acid.

"Yes," I meekly say.

"Let's get on with it, Evans. Tell me about how you feel so bad for me and that you completely understand what I'm going through. Then you can pat me on the shoulder and tell me it will all be okay, and that we'll get through this together, even though you didn't give a damn about me before."

"James!" I say shocked at what he's saying.

He narrows his eyes at me. "Don't tell me that's not exactly what you were going to do, Miss Perfect—"

His voice has steadily gotten louder. I have the urge to slap him across his face, but I'm afraid that the adults downstairs would hear; if they haven't already heard James yelling at me. I can clearly hear our parents talking in the living room, which means they can probably hear us, too.

I put my hands on James's chest and push him (none too gently) inside his room. I walk in and shut the door behind me.

"Don't yell at me," I threaten.

"You shouldn't have listened," James coldly replies.

"No I shouldn't have," I say.

James doesn't respond, so I ask, "Why didn't you tell me?"

James snorts. "Please. It's not like you would have understood or anything."

How dare he assume something like that? I'm reminded of why we fought for the past six years, and my voice gets louder as I say, "I think I would have!"

He incredulously (and rudely) looks at me. "I'm pretty sure you don't know what it's like since everything in your life is just as perfect as you think you are…"

My body is screaming at me to whip my wand out of my pocket and hex him. I breathe in deeply before slowly and resolutely saying, "And I'm pretty sure you're still an arrogant git who doesn't know that my mum has cancer."

James's jaw drops. Good. I turn around and reach out to open the door when an arm grabs me and stops me. I expected him to be rough and pull me back, but his hand is gentle around my wrist, almost as if he's scared I'll break.

"What, Potter?" I hiss.

"I…er…"

I glare at his hand around my wrist while he tries to form a sentence. He notices and quickly drops it.

"I'm sorry," he finally says. I look up in his face and see, to my horror, that his eyes look broken, defeated.

I sigh."Me too."

James runs his fingers through his hair before turning to sit on the rumpled looking bed I assume to be his. Back at school I always thought that he messed up his hair to look cooler, but now I'm starting to associate it with nerves.

I cautiously set myself next to him. He doesn't yell at me, which I take as a good sign.

I wait for him to say anything, because I honestly have no idea what to say.

"He's always been older"—James's voice cracks on the word—"than the other dads. My parents had me later, so I knew they had more years on them than anyone else's parents, but I never really thought about it until the summer before our sixth year.

"He'd been coughing a lot, getting head colds, having trouble breathing, things like that. My mum took him to St. Mungo's, but they said they couldn't do anything to Heal him; he was just getting old. It was a part of life. They gave him potions to soothe his throat and help him breathe easier, but they basically said…When his time comes, his time comes. It was over the Easter holidays when Sirius and I were goofing off—I don't even remember what we were doing—and my dad yelled at us. Not big yelling, but just to tell us to knock it off. But then he started wheezing and sweating and he couldn't breathe, so we took him to St. Mungo's again. He had a heart attack. He was okay, but they said that his health wasn't. His lungs, his heart, his immune system, everything seemed to not be working as how they should. He had a real bad case of the measles before that left him weak, too… The Healers said he had about six months."

I have the urge to cry, but I still don't say anything. I can tell James wants to say it all at once.

"I went back to Hogwarts, and then a few days later I got a letter from my mum saying we're spending the summer at a Muggle beach for family time. Sirius was invited to come and all, since he was living with us, you know, but he had inherited some gold from his uncle last Christmas, so he bought a flat instead and got a job in Diagon Alley. He said he didn't want to ruin our family summer and that I should just be with my dad. I kept telling him he was part of our family too, but he was adamant."

I had vaguely heard Sirius had lived with the Potters last year, but I didn't know he was considered part of the family. Now his absence feels more explained, but more prominent. Not to mention that as I actually think about it, I had even once heard Sirius say that Mr. Potter was basically his dad, not his Black dad. But Sirius didn't come…because he wanted James to be with his dad…Merlin…

"We've never actually spoken about anything happening to my dad," James continues. "Mum told me what the Healers said, and then we never talked about it again. The only thing that's really acknowledged the fact that he won't be here a year from now is that we're here. Oh, and that he quit his job," James finishes.

"Quit his—?"

"Yeah, he quit when he first got sick. He never really had to work the past years; we're rich enough without him working. He just loved his job, though, so he went as long as he could. When you asked where he was that day on the beach, he was seeing a Healer for a checkup."

I feel so unsure of what to do. I want to comfort James, but I don't know how he operates. Does he like to be hugged or does he want his own space? Will he get mad if I tell him I'm there for him or should I just not say anything?

"My mum was diagnosed a few months ago," I say after deciding to talk about myself for the moment. "Skin cancer. She's not horribly sick, but she is sick. Sometimes she'll just lie in bed and sleep all day. Sometimes I can hear her get sick from her medicine. The doctors haven't set a time limit or anything, because there's still a chance she might be cured, but I'm just _so_ scared that this will be our last summer here as a whole family."

James nods his head in understanding, but he doesn't say anything. We sit there on his bed for a few moments before I reach out and lightly put my hand on his forearm.

"I'm sorry about your dad," I murmur.

"I'm sorry about your mum," he says, his voice equally quiet.

Someone knocks on the door and then swings it open. "Hurry up, you two! I made this dinner without using magic, and it's going—" Mrs. Potter doesn't finish her sentence, instead choosing to stare at James and I, who had leaped off the bed at the sound of her knock.

She looks quite surprised and a bit flustered. "Oh, I'm sorry; I didn't know I was interrupting something…"

"No, Mum—" James tries to say.

"Don't worry, James, I remember what it's like to be a teenager."

I feel like my face is on fire. "No, Mrs. Potter, we were just—"

"But you'll have plenty of time for that later! My food's getting cold, so let's go downstairs. Everyone else is already seated!" And then with a look that is a mixture of sternness and satisfaction, she walks out of the room, leaving James and I thoroughly embarrassed.

When I see James's face, I can't help but laugh. He laughs with me.

"Come on, my mum's been raving about being able to cook like a Muggle for days."

I walk back into the hall when James speaks behind me.

"Lily, don't, er, please don't tell anyone about my dad," he quietly says. "I'm sure my mum told your parents, but so far only the guys know, and I'd kind of like to keep it that way."

I give the black-haired boy a reassuring smile and say, "Yeah, 'course. Same with my mum, too."

James smiles, nods, and then walks past me, clomping down the stairs.

"Now let's go. I'm starving!"

* * *

><p>I wake up the morning after the dinner at the Potters' with my mind reeling from a very odd dream.<p>

In it, Mr. Potter got eaten by a pudding monster. James was so upset that he did nothing but cast Toenail Growing Charms on anyone that walked by him. Then the sun shone down on my mom, making her look shiny in the light, until the monster came and ate her, too. I then punched James in the face to get him together, and we attacked the pudding monster with giant purple spoons, saving my mum and his dad.

I'm only just admiring the craziness of my brain when I hear a screech and a tap on my window. I sit up to see through my half-closed eyes a familiar school owl hovering outside.

When I open my window, the owl flies in and lands on my dresser. I hurry to get water and treats for him, which he happily hoots at upon seeing, quickly eats the treats and drinks the water, and then flies back out.

I take the letter the owl brought, which has the Hogwarts crest on it, and stumble back over to my bed. Something falls out of the envelope and lands on the floor with a _thud_. I get down on my hands and knees and try to find whatever I had dropped. I run one hand across the floor while the other hand holds my supplies list in front of me.

I only need a few new books and supplies, but I'll definitely have to go to Diagon Alley…

My hand finally feels cool metal and I pick it up and look at it.

It's a badge in the shape of a Prefect badge, but instead it's got _Head Girl_ written on it…

Head Girl, that's nice.

I set the badge on my nightstand and lie back down on my bed, tired. I close my eyes to try and fall asleep again.

Head Girl.

I immediately sit up.

I shuffle through the papers I had thrown on the floor until I find one I don't normally receive.

_Dear Ms. Evans,_ it reads,

_Congratulations on being chosen as Head Girl! The honor is a great one and as Headmaster I feel that you will be able to _blah, blah, blah…

I don't bother to read the rest of the letter. I'm Head Girl! Me! Head Girl! I run downstairs shouting, "Mum! Dad! Look!"

I find my dad sitting in the living room. "Look what I've got!"

I shove the badge into my father's hands. "I'm Head Girl, Dad! Out of all the seventh year girls, they picked me! I never thought I'd be Head Girl… I mean, of course I hoped I would be, but that was always silly fantasies…"

"Lily!" my dad exclaims. "This is magnificent! Congratulations!" He beams at me, and I smile back in return. "You'll have to tell your mum when she wakes up. She'll be so excited."

I feel giddy, and then I think of James. Right after my mum and dad, he's the next person I want to share the news with.

"Be right back, Dad!"

I dash to my room, change, and tell my dad over my shoulder that I'm going to the Potters.

I ring the doorbell at the yellow house and Mrs. Potter answers.

"This is a surprise, Lily. You're up quite early," she says when she sees me.

"I know," I say, "but I just got my school owl and found out I was made Head Girl, so I wanted to tell James…" I'm starting to feel a bit self-conscious. It sounds really rude of me to come over to someone's house to brag about my achievement. I should probably just leave and James can find out on the first day of school…

"Why, that's amazing!" She ushers me inside and leads me into the kitchen where I find Mr. Potter sitting at a table reading the _Prophet _and drinking something. His face looks oddly discolored. "Charles, Charles, guess what? Lily was made Head Girl!"

Mr. Potter puts down his mug and the paper and faintly smiles up at me. "Congratulations, Lily. You'll make a fantastic Head Girl."

I feel shy all of a sudden and simply say "Thank you."

Mrs. Potter turns to me and says, "I think James is still sleeping, but you can go wake him up and tell him the good news!"

I nod and turn to go back up the stairs. This time when I reach James's door, I immediately knock.

He doesn't open the door.

I knock again a little harder, and I hear some rustling and a groan. James soon opens the door a crack, only his head poking out. His eyes are half-shut behind his glasses when he says, "Yeah?"

"Er, hey," I awkwardly say. Yep, I definitely should have waited.

"Lily, hi," James says as he rubs his eyes. He opens up his door and I see him wearing only pajama bottoms.

The first thing I notice is not his impeccable muscles (those were second), but four long scars that seem to be running from the back of his shoulder down to the front of his chest.

"What is that?" I shriek while pointing at it.

James looks down and panic flits across his face. "It's nothing, just a scratch—"

"A _scratch_? That is NOT a scratch!"

"Shh!" James grabs my arm and pulls me into his room, shutting the door behind me. I feel the déjà vu from the other night. "My parents will hear you!"

"They should know that you have those. You look terrible!" And he does. He's got circles under his eyes, as well as other little scratches on his arms.

"_No_," James firmly says. "They can't know. I fixed them on my own just fine."

I step forward to look at the four long gashes on his chest. He does look like he healed them all right…

"How'd you get them?" I ask.

James refuses to meet my eyes as he says, "Tripped."

I stare at him, but he doesn't meet my gaze. "Do you really think I'm that stupid?"

James doesn't answer.

I take another step closer to look at the scars. Whatever he says, he couldn't have gotten them from tripping. I have an odd feeling, as if the reason is in the back of my brain, but I just can't reach it.

My hand reaches out and I discover that four of my fingers line up almost perfectly with the marks. My hand lightly traces down the scars. Goose bumps erupt across James's skin. If I move my hand down his shoulder, it would be as if I had clawed him and made the wounds.

Clawed him…

"_I know it's coming up…"_

"…_fancy a night out with the boys…"_

"_I'll meet you guys at the usual spot…" _

"_Tell Moony and Wormtail too…"_

Moony.

My eyes widen and I slowly step away from James.

"James, you didn't…"

He doesn't say anything.

"Did Remus do that to you?"

"R-Remus?" he stutters. "Why would Remus do this? He wouldn't hurt a grub…"

"Because Remus is a werewolf," I flatly say.

Now it's James's turn for his eyes to expand. "You know?"

"Obviously."

"But, how? No one knows…" He looks like he got hit in the head with understanding. "Snape. I'm going to kill him," he darkly says.

"It wasn't Snape," I tell him. "I am friends and was a Prefect with Remus. You think I wouldn't notice that he always had to reschedule our rounds or go home once a month? And that he was almost always sick? Or that his boggart was a full moon? We did those in fourth year, remember."

"But…you never said anything…Remus would've told us…"

"He doesn't know I know."

"He doesn't know?"

"Guess not."

The half naked James Potter looks absolutely flabbergasted. "Then how come you've never said anything? When did you figure it out? You don't act scared of him or anything…"

I roll my eyes. "Of course not, he's still Remus."

James stares at me for a solid minute before he breaks out into a grin. "You, Lily Evans, are by far the most amazing witch I've ever had the pleasure to know."

I'm a bit embarrassed to say that I blush at his words, but then I realize what the real issue is.

"Did Remus do this to you, James?" The question wipes the smile off his face.

When he doesn't answer, I simply tell him, "Not answering basically tells me that that's a yes. What are you thinking running around with a werewolf! You could be bitten! You could DIE! Are Sirius and Peter doing it too? Do you guys have any sense? What, you just decide to go do something reckless and hang out with a werewolf? Well let me tell you, James, that that is probably the stupidest thing—"

"It's not like that, Lily," he hastily says. "Really, it's not. We…well, I can't tell you." At my angry look he says, "I just can't. Sirius would murder me if I did, anyway. You've just got to trust me, Lily."

I look at the scars on his chest again and then back up to his face. He looks ready to beg, and while I don't totally trust his judgment, I'm not going to force him to tell me. Although I would really, really, _really_ like to.

"Fine. Just…be careful. Scars all over your body won't do you any good."

James's face relaxes. "I know. And no offense, but what are you doing here?"

"Oh, yeah! I wanted to show you something." I grab my shiny Head Girl badge out of my pocket and hold it out towards James. "I'm Head Girl," I say, trying to suppress my pride.

"You with even more disciplinary power. Now _that_ is a scary thought!"

I make a face at him and he grins.

"Just messing with you. Congrats, though. I'll definitely have to be more careful if I want to be friends with the Head Girl."

"Ha, yeah…" This is the first time either of us has mentioned actually being friends and hanging out once school starts again. I avoid that topic of conversation like the plaque since I don't really know if that's what I want. And James hasn't said anything about it because…well, who really knows why James does or doesn't do things?

"Did you get your letter?" I ask him to divert his attention away from that area.

"Oh, yeah." He looks around the room. "I just kind of threw it on the floor somewhere…"

He picks up the bulky looking envelope by his dresser. When he walks back towards me I become aware again that he's still not wearing a shirt. And we're in his room. Alone. Not to mention the door's shut. I blush again.

When he comes back to stand next to me, I take a step away to give us some space. James doesn't say anything, but I see his expression change slightly.

He opens up the envelope and, like with my letter, something falls out.

James and I stare in silence at a shiny badge lying in the palm of his hand that reads _Head Boy_.

* * *

><p><strong>I think it's entirely and completely unrealisitc for James to tell Lily all about them being Animaguses and helping Remus and the Map and the Invisibility Cloak and such even before they date. James may really, really, really fancy Lily, but the Marauders are his brothers and he wouldn't risk their secret for someone he isn't even dating. That happens a lot in fanfictions, but, you know, just my thoughts. Also, I always thought it's weird when people make James and Lily not knew the other is Head BoyGirl until September 1st. Wouldn't Dumbledore tell the person who they'd basically be running the school with? **

**Also, I was reading a James and Lily fic (TLAT, pure amazingness) and had one of those moments where everything is all cute and adorable and you think "They're going to be happy forever and ever and ever because they were made for each other!" Then you realize they die in less than five years and a part of your heart breaks. Ever happen to anyone else?**

**Please review. I'm getting an insane amount of alerts and favorites, but reviews are the only things that will help me and my story improve. Believe it or not, I DO take the readers' opinions into consideration.**

**-MG**

**P.S. I've discovered I have a harder time coming up with chapter titles than writing the chapters. xP**


	14. A Needed Day

**REVIEW/ALERT/FAVORITE MANIA! Seriously, I have never gotten so many reviews on an indiviudal chapter before. Ever. (Unless you count my other story Reunion, but I don't because it's old and complete.) That makes me :). **

**Thanks toooo... WaveRider 53, AcrossTheWater, Peace-bookluva (yeah, Claire and James are dating), VoldemortHugger (I'm all about the L/J fics too :D), Narai9 (yeah, the present tense was difficult for me to get the hang of too, but I wanted to try something different. And don't worry, reading in English will only make you better. :), Super Cara (of course Claire does), yellow 14 (Amen!), ButlersTheJob, SpencerReidFan89, AriannaSafffyreMalfoy (I'm going to have to try to do that more, thanks!), Emullz (Petunia already knows Vernon, and I'm terrible, but I can't stand to include him in this, but yes, Nate is his name), Sammy-U, Red red red ribbon,Er-my-nee Weasley (end of summer), Rani Jashalithie, bookwormtsb (I love The Summer I Turned Pretty! It's a little inspiration from it, but mostly just the idea of coming back to a beach house every summer and having a different life, because I'm in love with the idea and just stayed at a beach house as well for the first time this summer), wingswordsandmetaphors, WickedCharm (noted :), worldnerd12, Starkidpotter13 (as of now, no sequel :/), urstory, thepotionsmaster7 (no sequel planned :/), softasthunder, Karen, starsandthings-s (thank you :D), Nightlight753, Marinewife08 (i love suggestions!), AshleyM15, lilybethluna, Tyem Marodyor, PenguinBoxers, youawitchornot, Kenzieloveify, bobbypingirl101, GossipGirl27, semperfortis (yes! thank goodness for ff!), JackieMooneyLestrange, PoohBearGoesGangster (yeah, but some of the chapters are a bit more serious, anyway, thanks :D), CookieDomination, Almost Genius (end of summer...What A's?), writergal24, percabethshamus, Stargazer2000 (thank you!), Sarahrules336, summertimewriter, nicole, chocomonkey1018, [blank], nicole (Google pottermore! It's JK Rowling's new interactive website!), YoungAndLiving (I thought that too for a while, but in the first book Hagrid tells Harry James and Lily were the top of their class and very nice, yadda yadda, and that they were both Head Boy and Girl),DanceDiva, PhoenixOfIce, and ****alohamora080, who left the most splendid review that made me smile from ear to ear. :)**

**Side Note: I never said thanks to the wonderful veterans in my last chapter, who I do think about every day.**

**Additional Side Note: James and Lily will get together near the end of the summer, and the story will end at the end of the summer, right before school starts. I always personally like the buildup more than the relationship anyway.**

**Side Note Number Three: Thanks to the alerters and favoriters too. :)**

* * *

><p>I have to pinch myself to make sure I'm not still sleeping.<p>

James is Head Boy? That's…that's…_ridiculous_!

"What…?"

James hurriedly scans through the papers until he's found a letter identical to mine.

_Dear Mr. Potter_, it says,

_Congratulations on being chosen as Head Boy!_

I stop reading after the first sentence. I blink. And then I blink again. Then I start laughing.

"You—Head Boy—James—responsibility!" I wheeze, practically doubling over. "Oho, good one, James. Very nice prank." After a moment, I place my hand on his bare arm and pull myself upright, still chuckling. "How'd you manage to make a badge identical to the one that belongs to the Head Boy?"

James doesn't respond. I nudge him in his side.

"Come on, you can tell me. That was a good prank, I must admit." My tired brain doesn't notice James's blank eyes and shocked expression.

He just stands there staring at the letter in his one hand and the badge in the other.

"This is a joke, right?"

James finally says something. "I wouldn't pull a joke this bad."

I turn to face him and look him head-on. "You mean you're really Head Boy?"

The supposed new Head Boy dumbly nods.

I don't know what to say. James is actually Head Boy? But who in their right mind would make James Head Boy? I know plenty of people have said that Dumbledore's a bit off his rocker, but I never actually thought he'd be barmy enough to do something like this! When has James ever shown Head Boy qualities? All he does (or did, I suppose) is go around pulling practical pranks on people and hexing people that annoy him and stealing Snitches. Alongside Sirius, he's probably broken more rules than the rest of the seventh years combined! Head boys aren't supposed to be rule breakers; they're supposed to be good, and want the best for their school and be a leader everyone else can look up to and help the younger kids.

Actually…I must admit that James has the leadership thing down. He's always been able to captain the Quidditch Team with surprising ease. He certainly has no problem taking over things in class or in day-to-day life.

And James generally wants the best for people. People he likes at least. He's definitely loyal.

There was also that one time when he caught a couple of third year Slytherins bullying a first year Muggleborn. The four boys had knocked all of her books out of her hand and then cast harmless but embarrassing jinxes on her. James had made them leave, promised to report them to McGonagall, and then gave the girl they were bullying a Chocolate Frog and helped her gather her things. That's one solid example of James being willing to help others. And this is just the first thing that comes to my mind, since it happened in the last month of our sixth year, not too long ago.

But still…the rules! A Head Boy is supposed to want to enforce the rules, not break as many as possible! I've broken a few rules (I still make regular midnight pie runs to the kitchens with Marlene), but I don't go and use magic in the halls, vandalize teacher's property, or Charm the Hogwarts' plates, silverware, statues, and desks for my amusement.

However, considering a few of the other seventh year boys (particularly Mulciber or Winston), James is hardly the worst choice for Head Boy. The thing is, though, that there are other boys to choose from. There's Remus, Wes, and Xavier, and those are just the past Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw Prefects.

I'm still pondering how awful this is on a scale of one to ten when James asks, "Why would Dumbledore make me Head Boy?" He sounds as perplexed as I feel, maybe even more so.

While I can think of reasons as to why this isn't bad enough that I should go bang my head in the wall, no reasons come to my mind as to why Dumbledore and the other professors would purposefully sit down and say 'James Potter should be Head Boy.' I give James my honest answer: "I don't know."

There's another long pause.

But maybe there's something else… Maybe there's something the professors see in James that I can't see yet. Is there a possibility he could be a good Head Boy? If he stayed the way he is now, yes, but…

"Well, uh, congratulations." I awkwardly pat his shoulder.

"I guess I should go tell my parents," James finally says. He walks over to his closet and pulls out a t-shirt. I try not to stare at his upper half. It's a bit difficult, only because it's like my brain says "Don't stare at James, don't stare at James," so my eyes naturally have to do it. I think James saw me gawking while he was rifling through his closet, so now he's taking his precious time putting his shirt on. Oh, now he's all smiles and rainbows. I suppose he forgot that fact that he, Marauder, rule breaker, not-a-Prefect, has just been made Head Boy since he's now smiling as if he had won the lottery. All because I may or may not have stared at him. Stupid git.

Changing in front of me seems to bother him so little, I'm almost afraid that any moment he'll take off his pajama bottoms to put on some pants. I blush and force myself to look at the beds, the floor, the windows, my shoes—anything but James really—and try not to think of his lower half.

James eventually puts on his shirt (and only that) and we walk out of the room.

"Mum, Dad, I've got my letter for school," James tells Mr. and Mrs. Potter once we join them in the kitchen.

"Good," Mr. Potter absentmindedly says.

"Isn't it wonderful that Lily got Head Girl, James?" Mrs. Potter gushes. "Hogwarts sure is lucky!"

"I don't know about that," James says. I agree on the inside.

James's mum turns to look at him. I notice that there are a lot of lines in her face. Or does is it just look that way to me because I know about her husband?

"Don't be a prat, James," Mrs. Potter admonishes, and if I was properly thinking at the moment, I would laugh at Mrs. Potter calling her son a prat. "All the students, professors, and the Head Boy are very fortunate to have Lily as their Head Girl."

"I'm sure the Head Boy is ecstatic," James dryly says.

James makes a motion that indicates he's leaving, and I realize that he's not going to tell his parents. Before I think about what I'm doing, I blurt out, "JamesisHeadBoy."

James's face is full of astonish as he looks at me.

"What was that, dear?"

"Oh, er, well, James just had something to tell you…" I look at James and try to convey a look that says _Tell them, you prick!_

"I'm Head Boy," he finally says with an air of difficulty.

His parents look stunned. James holds the badge for them to see and Mr. Potter wordlessly takes it. No one says anything, but then Mrs. Potter bursts into tears and runs forward to hug James.

"My baby boy! Head Boy! Oh, I'm so proud of you, Jamesie! You and Lily will be the best Head Boy and Girl Hogwarts has ever seen!"

Mr. Potter gets up and stands next to his wife and son. When the woman finally releases the abashed looking boy, he claps him on the shoulder and says, "Congratulations, son."

"Thanks, Dad," James says.

I look at my feet and pretend to be invisible. I have the feeling that I'm intruding on a family moment that they'll look back on for a while, and I'd rather they not remember a girl with disastrous morning hair staring at them.

Mrs. Potter then moves towards me and sweeps me up in a hug. "This is such good news, Lily!" I hug her back and can feel a smile on my face. "At least now we'll know that the Head Girl is able to keep our James in line."

I laugh along with her, but then I think behind that sentence while she plans how our families should celebrate.

When we get on that train the first day of September, I don't know who I'll find.

I may find James, and he may stay James the whole school year. We could have a fun and peaceful seventh year as Head Boy and Girl, and we could stay friends, and the school would have no idea why James Potter changed for the better, but just that he did.

Or I could step into the Heads compartment and find Potter, who would flirt with me, tease others, and disregard the rules for the entire year. We could go back and forth with our bickering, and the school would remember us as the Head Boy and Head Girl who had dueled during a Prefect meeting.

Before we had gotten our letters and badges, I had actually thought about what I would do if I was greeted with Potter on Platform 9 ¾. I would be polite, but I would follow the brilliant tactics I perfected our sixth year: Don't yell at him. Reject him with a curt no. Avoid him at all costs.

But now that we're Head Boy and Head Girl, it won't be so easy to steer clear of him. It was hard enough to evade him last year, and now that in addition to having classes and meals together, we would have Head meetings, Prefect meetings, rounds, and our own Common Room and dormitories in Gryffindor Tower with no one else to give us space.

Part of me thinks it is unlikely that he would change into Potter once school started, but at the beginning of the summer he was able to so suddenly turn into a person I liked, it should be no problem for Potter to reappear. And back at school he'll have Quidditch to brag about, friends to prank with, boundaries to push, more freedom to exert, Slytherins and others to jinx, fawning girls to flirt and snog with…

How in the world will I be able to survive the year if he turned back into Potter?

* * *

><p>Over the next week, I become increasingly aware of Mr. Potter. When my family and James's family go out to dinner to commemorate James becoming Head Boy and me Head Girl, like James, I tense at every noise that shouldn't be made.<p>

James also tells Claire and me he's spending the day with his family more and more. Claire doesn't know why, and I don't tell her. She just knows that James can't come out.

The Potters don't go out as often either; they usually just stay inside their house. Or at least I don't see them out anymore. I do know that Sirius comes over a couple times. I know that Sirius is there for two reasons: to be there for James, and because of Mr. Potter. It seems so odd now, that I hadn't really ever given the thought of Sirius and Mr. and Mrs. Potter. I typically thought he was just there because of James. I never pondered over how Sirius regards Mr. and Mrs. Potter as his own parents. I expect he's here to say goodbye to Mr. Potter…

At first I think I am just being paranoid concerning the Potters and their activities, but then my suspicions are confirmed while my dad and I are working on one of his puzzles.

"So how is James?" my dad asks as he digs through the box of pieces.

"Okay," I say. But then I think about how he'd snapped at me quite a bit and how he had seemed more annoyed and tense the few times I saw him, and say, "Actually, he's not good. He's just… I don't know, Dad. I don't know what to say or do."

"Mr. Potter isn't getting any better," my dad seriously says. I can't help but think that the real way to phrase it is "Mr. Potter is getting worse."

"I know. And James is directly linked to his dad: The worse Mr. Potter gets physically, the worse James gets emotionally and mentally and everything else."

Dad is quiet for a minute, during which I turn a puzzle piece upside down to try and connect it to another piece.

"He's lucky to have you, you know," he ultimately says.

"Yeah, and all his friends are there for him, I'm sure. And Claire. She's a good distraction, I think."

"That's not what I meant."

"Huh?"

"I meant that he's lucky to have _you_," my dad says, looking me in the eye. He has the same emerald green almond shaped eyes as me. "A bloke needs a girl as remarkable as you in a time like this, Lily."

I smile up at my dad. "Thanks, Daddy." And then I realize how blessed I am to have parents like mine. I hope I'll have them with me for a long, long time.

* * *

><p><em>Dear Lily,<em>

_Fantastic news! _

_Dad's giving me the next two days off, so I can come see you. Mind if I spend the night tomorrow? Where is it safe to Apparate? Would it be better if we met up somewhere? Write back as soon as possible!_

_Can't wait to see you,_

_Marlene _

I hold Marlene's letter in my hand while running down the stairs, skipping every other step.

I walk into the kitchen and no one is there, so I walk into the dining room to see Petunia with some papers. "Oh, hi," I say. "Have you seen Mum?"

"Upstairs in her room, getting dressed."

I hasten up the stairs yet again. "Come on in!" my mother says when I knock on her door.

I see her leaning over and searching through her jewelry box.

"Hi, Lily."

"Mum, can Marlene come over tomorrow and spend the night? This is the only time her dad will let her off of work. We'll stay outside and go to the beach or something."

"That's fine, Lily. How's she going to get here?"

"Umm… I don't really know. Can I meet her in Diagon Alley and then she can Apparate into my room? I would Side-Along."

I really need to get my Apparation license.

"How would you get to Diagon Alley?"

"Er, could you drive me a little bit out of town and then I can take the Knight Bus? I just don't want to risk anyone here seeing the bus. The bus could then take me right to Diagon Alley. "

"All right," my mum says. "Just…be careful when you go," she advises.

"I will, I promise. And it's Diagon Alley, so there will be plenty of people around. And I won't talk to strangers. I'll just go and get Marlene and then we'll come home. Okay, maybe we'll stop for ice cream at Fortescue's, but he's a really nice man and—"

My mum's laugh cuts me off. "Breathe, Lily! I trust you, just don't do anything foolish. Now, which earrings look better with my shirt?"

She holds up one creamy pearl earring and round diamond earring against her light blue blouse.

"The pearl," I confidently say.

Mum sets the diamond back in the box and then carefully puts the pearl earrings into her ears.

I always loved going through Mum's jewelry box. She has the most intricate and beautiful jewelry I've ever seen. She's got pounds of earrings, enough bracelets to go all the way up her arm, and a few rings she'll wear alongside her wedding ring.

Years ago, my mum would supervise Petunia and I as we dug through her box and picked out our favorite pieces. Once we each had on about three rings, a pair of earrings, ten bracelets, and two necklaces, Mum would then bring out her makeup box.

I have makeup of my own now, but back then, Mum's makeup was the most fascinating thing. Petunia and I would look at all the eye shadows and lipsticks and pick out our favorite colors. I still remember that Petunia's favorite lipstick was a light pink and mine was a vibrant red that almost matched my hair.

Petunia's second favorite eye shadow was a pale pink to match her lipstick; my second favorite was a bright blue. Our first favorite eye shadow, however, we could agree on. We had both decided that the sparkly, glittery, and smooth looking silver eye shadow was the very best color, although we've only seen our mum wear it a couple of times.

Petunia and I would look into Mum's makeup pouch for as equally long as the jewelry box, but we never touched it. We once made the mistake of trying to give each other makeovers while our parents were downstairs making dinner, and we looked like a mixture of clowns and tramps. Not to mention we also ruined some of Mum's best makeup. From then on, we let our mum do the makeup. We looked twenty times better when she did it anyway.

I smile fondly at Mum's wooden jewelry box and turn towards the door when Mum calls me.

"Lily!"

"Yeah?"

"Come here."

I walk over towards where she's standing in front of her dresser with a jewelry box. There's a mirror hanging beside the bureau.

Mum starts rummaging through her jewelry box, opening and closing all the many drawers. She finally pulls out the necklace I liked to look at the most when I was younger. It has a silver chain and a tiny silver pendant in the shape of a tear drop. Inside the silver tear is a single, gorgeous emerald stone.

"That doesn't match, Mum," I say.

She smiles and says, "Well, I'm not wearing it!"

I'm confused. She must know it for she says, "You are."

I gasp a little. "No, I can't, I'd ruin your necklace," I protest.

"Oh, come on. Don't be an old stiff. Just wear it. It would look lovely on you since it matches your eyes."

"Yeah, but it's really important to you and valuable."

And it is. Mum had told Petunia and I that Dad had given it to her while she was pregnant with me and he had to go away for two weeks on a business trip.

"When I asked him what it was for," my mum had told my sister and me, "he said, 'It's so you can always remember me,' because the emerald stone was almost identical to his eyes."

Petunia and I had giggled at this, before I had gotten my Hogwarts letter, and Petunia said, "Dad said this? Our dad?"

Mum had laughed and said, "Yep, your father did. Although I expect he really just wanted to make sure I didn't make him sleep on the couch when he got back."

All three of us had laughed and giggled at that, and I remember thinking how I wanted a man to give me something like that and be just as romantic—if it even meant slightly cheesy.

"Just wear it, Lily." Mum holds it out to me and the corners of her blue eyes are slightly crinkling from her smile.

I hesitate.

"If you don't take it, it will hurt my feelings and I'll feel sad whenever I look at it from now on."

Ah, the old guilt trip. Sneaky, but effective.

"Fine, I'll only wear it today."

"And tomorrow." At my incredulous look Mum says, "What's the point of wearing something if no one's going to see you in it? Wear it to Diagon Alley and Marlene and anyone else you run into can see it."

"Fine, tomorrow too. But I won't go swimming in it. And I'll be extra cautious and give it back to you before I go to bed tomorrow. Promise."

Mum laughs. "You're such a worrier, Lily. You just need to calm down."

I pointedly look at her. "Will you at least put it on me then?" I ask.

I turn around and lift all of my thick hair up. Mum puts the necklace around my neck and I feel her connect the clasp to the chain. I let down my hair when she's done and look into the mirror. The necklace looks even prettier than when I was little, and it does match my eyes.

"I told you it would make you even more beautiful."

I roll my eyes and tightly hug my mum. She hugs me back. "Thanks, Mum," I say.

She gives me an extra squeeze and then releases me.

"Now go write back to Marlene or else she won't be able to come!"

As I leave the room, I hear her say, "You know, I think you should even take it with you to Hogwarts…"

* * *

><p>I'm standing in front of Ollivander's Wand shop scanning the crowd for a sign of a head covered with wavy blonde hair when someone taps me from behind and says, "Boo!"<p>

I jump and turn around to see Marlene.

"Marlene!" I throw my arms around her and hug her. "When'd you get here? I've been waiting for ages!"

"I just got here," she says, smiling, "and when I saw a redhead jumping up and down to see through the crowd, I knew it was you."

I laugh because I'm sure I looked pretty foolish. "Come on."

We go to Florean Fortescue's ice cream shop, where we tell him "the usual" (chocolate and raspberry ice cream with nuts and raspberry Bertie Bott's jelly beans for Marlene, mint with Chocolate Frog bits sprinkled all over for me) and sit outside and talk.

Marlene tells me about how glad she is her mum made her take almost every class except Care of Magical Creatures, Muggle Studies, and Ancient Runes her sixth year. Now she can take all the N.E.W.T. classes to become an Auror, which she's now sure she wants to do.

I tell her about my mum and dad and Petunia. Marlene says she's not surprised that Petunia is still being a "frigid, stubborn Muggle."

I tell Marlene it's not all Petunia's fault she's angry and jealous, and Marlene makes a pitying face and says, "You're right, Lils. It's totally your fault you were born with magical powers that you couldn't stop from getting. Damn you."

I laugh.

We talk about Claire, me being Head Girl, and James. Marlene's interested in this new James.

"So you like him now?"

"Yeah," I say, "he's a good friend. He's stopped asking me out and we hang out quite a bit with Claire. Sometimes without."

Marlene thoughtfully takes a bite out of her ice cream. "I told you he wasn't that bad."

"This James isn't too bad. The school one is."

"There's a difference?"

"Of course there is," I assure her. "This one is nice and funny and not a bullying prat. The school one is not nice or funny and is a bullying prat."

"And there's not a possibility that you actually just got to know James and found out that you like him?" For some odd reason, Marlene kind of likes James and Sirius. She does talk badly about them with me when they're being gits, of course. Well, she listens. Sometimes she'll tell me that I'm being too harsh, but whatever.

I finish off the last of my ice cream and stand up to throw the cup away. "Nope, no possibility. Are you ready? I hear the beach calling my name!"

Marlene throws away her empty cup as well, and then she Disapparates to my room at the beach house with me on one of her arms, her overnight bag on the other.

After my mother fawns over how wonderful Marlene looks and they chat about the summer thus far, Marlene and I head up to my room to change into our swimming outfits. As I'm searching about my room for my sandals, the doorbell rings.

"It's for you, Lily!" my mum calls a minute later.

Marlene looks at me. "Is this the new and improved James Potter?" She wiggles her eyebrows at me. "Because I think I'd like to go say hi." She bounds off my bed and out the door.

"Marlene! What are you going to do?" I dash after her. She skips down the stairs giggling, reminding me of a five year old. "Come on, Marlene, he's still James! Don't make a fuss about it!"

"Moi? Jam—Who are you?" She blocks my view of who is standing in front of the closed door, but I can assume it's not James. Which makes me believe that it's…

"Claire, hi," I say.

"Hi, Lily," Claire replies. With a look at Marlene, she says, "Hi."

"Hi," Marlene says.

"Claire, this is Marlene. Marlene, this is Claire. Marlene goes to school with James and me, Claire."

"So this is the Claire you told me about, Lily?" Marlene asks. "Nice to finally meet you."

"You too," Claire says. "Except neither James nor Lily told me about you," she says a bit snootily, "but I'm sure that doesn't mean anything."

The smile disappears from Marlene's relaxed face. "Oh?" She looks at me.

"Er," I uncomfortably say, "I'm pretty sure I've mentioned Marlene before, Claire. Maybe I haven't told you everything about her, but I know I've mentioned her before."

The brunette ponders this. "I'm sure you have, sometimes I can just be a space case. I know James hasn't, though. I know I would have remembered!" She laughs and I politely chuckle as an instinct, but Marlene does not make any appreciative noise.

"Really? Why's that?"

"Because I'm dating James, of course! I _know_ Lily told you about that, and I'm sure you would remember." I cringe. Truth is, I did tell Marlene, but she would rather dance on the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall during dinner than admit it.

"Nope, I think she left that out." Her tone is unmistakably rude.

"Oh." Claire looks a bit hurt, but with a cheerful smile that reveals her white teeth she says, "Well, I'm dating James."

"Right, got that."

"Just checking that you did. Some people need to hear things twice."

My jaw drops. Did she…did she just say that? Claire smiles so sweetly at Marlene, she might as well be oozing caramel. Yes, yes she did.

Marlene gives a thin smile back.

"Sorry that I can't do anything today, Claire, but Marlene—"

"How long have you been dating James?" Marlene asks. Oh, God. I nervously tug on the necklace Mum gave me yesterday.

"About four weeks."

"Mmm."

"Why?" Claire defensively asks.

"I just wouldn't get used to it, is all. I don't know if Lily's told you this, but James has never dated anyone for more than six weeks. And since this is a summer thing, I expect the inevitable is just right around the corner…"

I groan internally. _What_ is happening?

Claire's eyes flash. "I'm sure we'll be just fine. I know how to keep a bloke. Thanks for the warning, though." I hope Marlene doesn't detect the sarcasm.

"My pleasure," the blonde-haired girl beside me says venomously. Or not.

Claire opens her mouth to retort, but my brain and mouth seem to be capable of functioning together again, so I cut her off. "Marlene, why don't you go upstairs and find a pair of sunglasses you can borrow?"

"Fine." She turns without even saying good-bye to Claire. Claire simply rolls her eyes at Marlene's retreating figure.

When Marlene is gone, I say, "Um, yeah, sorry, Claire, but I haven't seen Marlene the entire summer, so I'm going to be spending today and tomorrow with her."

"Don't know why you would want to," Claire mutters.

"Sorry?"

"I said, that's disappointing but understandable. I'll see you soon, right, Lily?"

I nod and show her out the door.

"_Why_ did you have to be such a bitch to my only Muggle friend this summer?" I ask Marlene when I'm upstairs in my room again.

"She started it," Marlene tells me. "Besides, why would you want to be with her anyway? And James too, for that matter. Not when he's always—Anyway, I didn't like her."

"Yeah, I got that. But why?"

"Something about her is off to me. Not to mention all her snide remarks to me. I mean—hullo! Best mate here! The least she could do was be nice!" Marlene begins to braid her blonde hair to the side.

"Yes, but so could you when you stop to realize that I have a few more weeks here and she's going to forever think that you're a swot!"

"So?" Marlene says. "She's just a Muggle."

I glare at her.

"Oh, come on, Lily. You know I didn't mean it like that. I meant that it doesn't really matter because I'm ninety-nine percent sure I'll never see her again. I didn't mean she deserved it because she's a Muggle. You know I'm not like that. Anyway, I suppose I was just crushed that it wasn't the "New-And-Improved" James. Considering how you talk about him, he might as well be a gift from Merlin sent to bless you with endless smiles and—"

"Sod off," I say while rolling my eyes.

Marlene only beams up at me.

We eventually make it to the beach, where we spend the day there, lying about and swimming in the water. We walk through town and Marlene admires some gaudy beach jewelry until I buy it for her since she has no Muggle money. She promises to pay me back and treat us to Butterbeers our first Hogsmeade trip of the year.

Even though we had written each other almost every other day for the entire summer, we talk the entire time, cutting each other off and different conversations flying faster than the new Cleansweep broomstick. I think we only get about three hours of sleep.

All too soon, it's the afternoon yet again, and we're standing on my front porch saying good-bye.

Marlene hugs me tightly and says, "I'll see you soon. Only a few more weeks and then we'll be the top of the school!"

"That's right." The thought sounds amazing. I grin despite all my uncertainty about the future.

Marlene and I hug once more before she Disapparates to her home.

I walk into my own house feeling much happier and more satisfied. Some time with my best mate was exactly what I needed.

* * *

><p><strong>Lily's ignorance and obliviousness are annoying me. But I really enjoyed writing Marlene being a kldhfdsf to Claire. That was fun. ;)<strong>

**So, I'm not into that whole "here's a link to show the EXACT dress she was wearing in Chapter X!" because it kind of gets rid of the reason to describe it and creativity, and I'm not really a fan of putting characters to faces of celebrities personally, but I WAS interested in seeing who James and Lily could be, and I've joined the crowd with Karen Gillan being the best Lily that I know of (but not exactly how I pictured her) but James, on the other hand, I can not find anyone who looks like him. At all. Not even who everyone else uses. I guess someone as good looking at James Potter can't be recreated. ****;)**

**Anyone have any really good opinions on real life James and Lily?**

**Thanks for the reviews, alerts, and favorites,**

**MG**


	15. ThreeInOne

**Forgive me? I wish I had a proper excuse, but I honestly don't. The rundown is, however: family vacation, homework, social life, exams/classes finishing, a job, sports, some seriously moody days, drama, and an insane desire to watch Christmas movies. **

**I just want to let you all know that I will never abandon this. Unless something insanely crazy happens, like...well, I'm not even going to go there and jinx it, but I would never be one of those people who got tired of writing so they quit!**

**Thanks for the reviews and patience tooooooo...cassie, StargazerBabells [thanks!], YourAngelicVampyre [haha, well, it's safe to say that that is a very creative idea, but far, far more exciting than what I have in store for Claire!], SigyArtyn [aha, not gonna lie, I suck at making this seem like the 70s. It's hard enough for me to make it seem semi-British, so I know I haven't really gotten the era down perfectly, but I'm okay with that for now. Thank you though!], PaganWitchGirl, xXjaziXx [yeah, my Lily has a thinner face as well, but there's really only one picture of Karen Gillan that I see and I'm like "Lily." And no, you're not the only one! That James Potter was weird!], softasthunder [story of my life, dude.], PenguinBoxers, Atelophobia Kedavra, Bella [nope!], Tyem Marodyor [haha, it's probably typical in the sense that they'll probably get together in some cheesy way at the end of the summer. but yes, LOTS of experience mixing friends. -_-] Sammy-U, writergal24, Anonymous, PhoenixOfIce, yellow14 [I checked him out, he's a good artist!], Sarahrules336, alohamore080 [you're welcome! I'll probably go back to review more, since you had a lot of interesting things... :)], bookwormtsb [gosh, no, he was a terrible james!], YoungAndLiving, youawitchornot, Mrs. Catherine Potter, summertimewriter, AcrossTheWater, Starkidpotter3 [Of course I get you're reference! And yes, I love this relationship too. Not to mention that in my mind James is supermegafoxyawesomehot. ;)], books4evah [Thanks! Claire is a very...unique character. There's a description down here that describes her perfectly.], JackieMooneyLestrange [sdjfhdksf. She's good too, I just feel like NO ONE can live up to them!], JazzLunatica, starsandthing-s [:S sorry for making you wait so long!], semperfortis, Almost Genius [hahaha, you'll see very, very soon...], urstory, CinziaTwut [ha, well, I'm glad you gave my story a chance and are enjoying it now! :)], lilybethluna, AriannaSaffyreMalfoy [taylor lautner IS very nice! ;D], (blank), Elos [I'm going to PM you regarding your hilarious/long review. :)], Haven'tgottenanaccountyet [I thought the same thing too in the beginning! No worries, and thanks. :)], Super Cara [gasp, I haven't seen a parody for Hunger Games! I should go find it...], Gray Fedora [hahaha, same happened to me.], and xTractx!**

**Regarding Claire...she's very picky and sensitive when it comes to James, as she likes him a lot, but in James's mind, this entire thing is just a summer fling he has no intention of continuing. A little more on the two of them in this chapter and the next!**

* * *

><p>If you had told my eleven-year-old self that James Potter would intrude on my holidays and we would be friends, I would laugh myself silly. And if you had told that same first-year self that James Potter and Sirius Black would be standing in my entryway with me walking towards them, a smile on my face, I probably would have broken a rib from the hilarity of that ridiculous idea. Yet after my mum says, "Lily, there are two charming boys here to see you!" I begin towards James Potter and Sirius Black, who are standing in the entryway of my summerhouse, with a smile on my face. As I walk down the hallway towards the two boys my mother told me were at the door, I notice that the raven-haired pair has not noticed me because they are too busy crossly muttering at each other and their backs are slightly towards me.<p>

"I don't I hate her, I just don't want to see you get hexed. Again. Come on, let's go play Quidditch or something," Sirius whispers.

"I'm not going to get hexed! I told you we're friends!" James responds. I start to walk a tad slower. They still haven't noticed me walking directly towards them. Boys.

Sirius quietly snorts.

"We are!" James indignantly mumbles. "Look, we don't have to spend all day with her. I just really want to—"

"Hi," I say, trying to hide my suspicion as the boys turn to face me. I'm standing close enough that if they noticed me and I hadn't said anything it would look quite awkward.

"Lily." James's hand jerks up to his head, but before it touches his hair, he brings it back down. "Hey."

"Hi, Sirius." I nod at him. "I see you're back again."

He nods back. "Nice mum."

I'm not sure if it's meant to be sarcastic or not, since I know Mum barely talked to them except to introduce herself to Sirius and inquire his name, but for some reason, I don't think Sirius would make a joke like that. Not about someone's mum. "Thanks," I say. "So what are you two doing here?"

"Just thought we'd drop in and say hello," James says.

"Yes, _we_," Sirius says, glancing at James.

James coughs. "Er, anyway, want to go get some lunch with us in town?"

"Sure, let me get my shoes and tell my parents." I grab the first pair of shoes I can find, some money from my purse in the kitchen, and tell my dad I'm going out to lunch with Sirius and James.

The walk there is awkward. No one says anything, and I almost wish that James and Sirius will talk about something completely and utterly stupid, so long as there is conversation going on.

"Did you hear that they changed Dumbledore's chocolate frog card?" Sirius says to break the silence.

I look at James, whom I can tell didn't know either. "Really? What'd they change about it?"

"Yeah, now it says, 'Dumbledore is particularly famous for his defeat of Grindelwald in 1945, for the discovery of the twelve uses of dragons' blood, and for making the single worst decision in the history of Hogwarts: appointing James Potter Head Boy.'" Sirius grins.

"Oi!"

I laugh—an honest, genuine laugh—but it doesn't seem like James is amused.

"Sod off," he says irritably, although I can tell he isn't really upset. He shoves his hands in his pockets pretending to be hurt, but Sirius doesn't even notice.

"I mean, come on! Evans makes a little bit of sense, when you ignore the fact that she'll probably make all the first years hate Hogwarts after she gives them detention for whispering too loudly in the library or for not tucking their shirts in properly, but at least—"

This time James laughs while I make an odd spluttering sound.

"Why I—I would not—That was one time, Black! And if you call that whispering, then you clearly need to look up the definition of the word and rethink some things! Not to mention it was exam week and I had—"

"Don't get your knickers in a knot, Evans," Sirius says brusquely. "I'm just taking the mickey out on you. The point is, why would Prongs here become Head Boy? Personally, I like to think that Dumbledore is using reverse psychology. Clearly no one would ever want the job—"

"People work for this job!"

"—so if Dumbledore starts to give it to the misbehaved students, the troublemakers would start acting like Evans here, all perfect and studious, so that they _wouldn't_ become Head Boy!—"

"Black, that's ridic—"

"—It's diabolical, but they don't call him the greatest wizard for nothing!"

"Now hold on a minute, you really think that Dumbledore would waste the Head Boy position so that he can reign in the troublemakers?"

"Hmm, good point, Evans. Maybe Dumbledore gave it to Prongs so that he'll crack from the responsibility and then be forced to—"

"_Or_," James nearly shouts, "Dumbledore thought I'd be the best Head Boy and that I really deserved it."

It gets real quiet.

I'm not going to laugh. I swear I'm not. It's not even funny. It _could_ be true: James _could_ be a good Head Boy. It's not funny at all that James would think that. So don't laugh, Lily, don't laugh, don't laugh… Sirius leans a bit forward and looks at me over James, who is walking between us. His face is completely blank, what I'm trying to make mine now. And then Sirius's lip twitches. It's the smallest movement, barely noticeable, but I see it. I see his upper lip twitch for just a moment as he fights back a smile, and I lose it.

Completely lose it.

I burst out laughing. A moment later, I hear Sirius's bark-like laugh join in.

"I hate you both," James grumbles.

"I mean, that's a possibility, Prongs, especially when it comes to Snivelly, because I think if he was Head Boy I would just pitch myself into the Black Lake and never come out again."

"Thank God it's not him," I whisper, thinking aloud.

Sirius and James get quiet. "Sorry?"

"Oh, uh, I just meant, I'd rather have James as Head Boy than Severus because—well—you know, given our history I don't think we could work very well—Not that Severus would be a bad Head Boy! Or that he doesn't deserve it! But, er, if I had to pick, I would pick James instead of—"

"Bloody hell, James, you've finally come before Severus! I think the Giant Squid is you're only competition now!"

James laughs, shaking his head at Sirius. I feel my cheeks begin to color, but I shake the awkward feeling off. If James can look back at that and laugh, so can I. Even if I have to ignore a little bit of unexplainable guilt.

"Café Frémont? Sounds fancy."

* * *

><p>"If by fancy you mean fish and chips and Yorkshire pudding, yes," I tell Sirius.<p>

"And don't worry about the whole Muggle money thing, I'm paying," James informs Sirius as we walk in.

Sirius shrugs his shoulders. "All right. You owe me anyway since you ate all of my limited edition Honeydukes' Collector's Box of Sweets Andy and Ted got me for my birthday."

"Three, please," I say to the bored looking hostess. She leads us to a booth.

"That was Remus!"

"Sure."

James ignores him and slides into the booth next to me. Sirius sits across from us. "Evans, I'll pay for you, too," James says.

"What? No, that's okay, I've got my money—"

"Don't worry about it, Mum gave me plenty and—"

"I can't let you pay for my lunch!"

"Lily," James says, a half smile on his face, "I got it. Mum wants me to experience things like a Muggle anyway, spend as much money as I can, learn how to handle it. Paying for you would be like an extension of Muggle Studies class."

"You sure?" Sirius is watching us as if we just broke out into song and are singing about our love for all things Slytherin.

"Yup."

I sigh a little, so that James knows while I'm not entirely comfortable with it, I'll let him. "Thanks, James." I smile.

Sirius looks really confused. He begins to mutter to himself. "What the fu-?"

"Sirius? You're okay with eating here, right?"

"What? Oh, yeah, sure, of course."

"Okay." I pick up the one sided menu and scan it for something good to eat, although I can probably recite all the dishes they serve here.

When the elderly waiter, who introduces himself as Martin, comes for our drink orders, James and I ask for a Coca-Cola at his inquisitive look. Sirius, on the other hand, says, "Uhh…" He starts to scan his menu for the drinks. "Butterbeer?"

I want to bang my head on the table. The man's thick grey eyebrows shoot up.

"Excuse me? We have beer—no _Butterbeer_—but I doubt you're old enough to be drinking, young man, and—"

"He'll have a Coke as well," James interrupts. With a suspicious look and a _harrumph_, the man leaves to get our drinks. James and I look at Sirius.

"What?"

"Clearly," I say, "you haven't spent much time in a Muggle environment."

"Can't say I have," Sirius says airily. "But I'll make sure to put 'Spend summer with Muggles' on my _Things to Do before I Die_ list. It can go directly under 'Ride a hippogriff and/or dragon' and 'Shag a Veela.'"

James snorts, and I refrain from rolling my eyes. "Charming. So besides making that list of yours and presumably wrecking havoc, what have you been doing this summer?"

"Interesting you should ask, Evans, because besides wrecking havoc (which I'm wonderful at), I've got a job."

"_You_ have a job? What kind of job could you possibly have?"

"I'm a man there to aid helpless women by fulfilling their needs and bringing them pleasure and happiness."

My jaw drops. He's a _what_? I look at James. He's grinning, slightly shaking his head, and looking at the ceiling before bringing his eyes down to look at me.

"I'm sorry," I say, trying not to jump to conclusions, "but where, exactly, do you work?"

"Edna's Magnum Opuses. It's a witches' clothing store in Diagon Alley. Where did you think I was working?" Sirius asks me with a suggestive grin.

I blush, knowing Sirius very well knew how I would interpret that. "I've never heard of Edna's Magnum Opuses," I say to get the topic of conversation away from me.

"It's new, so she needed workers. I just show people what kind of clothes we have depending on what they're looking for and convince them to buy some. It's more formal clothing, and it's sodding awful trying to convince these old, obese witches that 'Yes, that _is_ your color,' and 'No, it does _not_ make your hips look large.' And then these giggly little third years come in and collapse over each other and pretend to look. It pays well, though, and it was the only place hiring there. I always go to the Leaky Cauldron for a drink afterwards, so that's something to look forward to at least." He grimaces.

"But…well, no offense, but why would Edna hire _you_?" James laughs, but quickly stifles it at my glare.

"Because I have the three-in-one package," Sirius simply says.

"What?"

"One, I'm an attractive, talented, popular, smart—"

"Don't forget humble."

"—Hogwarts student that everyone looks up to. I can't tell you how many witches from school have come in, mostly to flirt with yours truly. Edna also thinks that the birds are going to think, 'Sirius Black works there, so it _must_ be a good place to shop!'"

"And she is, naturally, right, isn't she?" James sarcastically says.

"Naturally."

Martin comes back with our drinks at that moment and asks for our entrée orders. James orders fish and chips, Sirius asks for some turkey legs, and I say, "Split pea soup, please." Ed jots it all down on his notepad and then walks away with a stiff nod and a polite, "You're food will be out shortly." I watch him walk away and notice he has a bit of a limp in his leg. I wish I could simply swish my wand and heal it for him, which I know I can do. As in I'm capable of performing that act, just not permitted. But if I was…

"Is it any good?" Sirius asks, critically eyeing the soda, drawing me back into the conversation.

"It's like happiness in a glass," James says certainly. I chuckle. James grins.

Sirius takes a rather large sip from the soda, and then he looks back at us. "I still would've liked a Butterbeer."

James rolls his eyes. "All right, number two?"

"Two, I'm a pureblood. From 'The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black,'" he mocks. "'_Toujours pur_.' Purebloods are so superficial that if they see a fellow pureblood—a pureblood with respect, mind you—shopping in a certain place, chances are they'll have a look around to see if it really is worthy of _their blood_." Sirius makes a disgusted face. I feel confused and unsure of how much I can say and ask.

I suppose I must be looking a bit distressed for James's elbow lightly knocks into my side. "Just say it, Lily. Sirius won't care."

"Not a bit," he confirms.

"Well, I don't really know how that stuff works—obviously, Muggle-born—so don't get offended, but didn't you walk out on your family? I know I don't know the whole situation," I say hurriedly, "but you always made it seem like the rest of the Blacks weren't your family, so wouldn't it not matter if you're pureblood or not, don't the rest of the Blacks kind of consider you a…traitor?"

Sirius smiles in a shocking Slughorn-like manner. I almost expect him to say, "Correct, Miss Evans! Five points to Gryffindor!"

"Yeah, I walked out on 'em," he says, "and I'm not going back. Only my immediate family members really know that, though. The rest of the purebloods, the Malfoys, the Lestranges, the Selwyns—they all think I'm a tragic, confused soul, corrupted by the House that I was incorrectly Sorted into, bound to come back to the right side. Thus, they would still probably investigate Edna's, because while I'm a traitor, I'm a Black. 'Incorrectly Sorted' or not."

"They're barking," I say. I look at James, who's intently looking at me. "I mean, incorrectly Sorted? Pah! And you are on the right side!" James looks away from me and quickly glances at Sirius. I look back at Sirius. He has a strange expression on his face.

"I know," he says. "It's just what they think."

Still…people like that…incorrectly Sorted just because of who his family is…as if this is the wrong side…Oh, they make me so mad!

"So what's your third 'advantage'?" I ask, forcing myself not to get angry at these people I don't even know.

"For the non-psychotic purebloods," Sirius says, acting as if nothing happened (which I suppose is true), "I am the innocent child who escaped from the mania of the Black family; was Sorted into an appropriate, Muggle-born accepting house; and found happiness in the Potters, one of the richest sane pureblood families. People also feel bad because they think I was kicked out and forced to work at Edna's to make a living, so there's a little bit of guilt, approval, and curiosity there."

"Wow," I say. "You sure do think you're popular."

"Of course I am," Sirius says, leaning back and crossing his arms. "I'm Sirius Black."

I stare at him for a moment to see if he's joking, but he looks entirely confident in what he's saying. I chuckle. "You sure are." I look around to see if our food is on our way, and instead I'm greeted with the sight of a familiar brunette and two children with her.

Claire looks around at the same time, and her eyes meet with mine. Her face lights up and she waves before turning back to the line in front of her, where two different parties are waiting to be served.

"Claire's here," I announce.

"What?"

"Claire. Over there." James turns and looks at Claire, Claudia, and Tommy. Claire glances back at our table, sees James, and waves. Then she looks down at Claudia's chubby hand in her own, shakes her head, and makes a face, indicating that it wouldn't be wise to bring her younger siblings over to see us.

"I guess I should go see her," James announces a bit awkwardly.

"Probably."

"Are you going to stay here, Lily?"

"Yeah, Sirius and I can bond. Tell her I said hi."

"All right."

When James reaches Claire, he kisses her cheek and she smiles again. I look away. Sirius is watching James and Claire oddly. I take a sip of my drink.

"I don't understand why he's with her," Sirius declares after a moment, looking at me once again.

"She's very nice," I say, "and friendly."

"But she's not James's type."

"You haven't even met her."

"But I know she's not the one for Prongs. Not by a long shot."

"How?"

"Because she's not…" Almost simultaneously Sirius and I look back at James and Claire, only catching a glimpse of their backs as James walks with Claire to her table on the other side of the restaurant, hands in his pockets, his usual walk familiar to me now. Sirius's grey eyes meet mine again. "She's just not."

"Not what?"

"Not for Prongs."

"You already said that, but _why_?"

"Can't say."

"Can't say because you don't want to or because you're not allowed to?"

Sirius looks thoughtful for a moment before saying, "Eh, a bit of both. What do you think of her, anyway? Cleo?"

"Claire."

"Whatever."

"She's…nice. We're friends. I mean, she's not going to be my best mate or anything," I say honestly, "but I do enjoy her company. She's a positive person, which is always nice. Sometimes she can be a bit…flighty, I suppose is the word, but Claire's generally a good person to be around. Makes you laugh. Marlene didn't like her, though."

Sirius's black eyebrows rise. "Marlene was here?"

"Yeah, she had gotten two days off of work so she came down." I check to see if James is coming back, but he's not. Our food is, however.

Martin places the food on the table, and I give him a rather large smile when I say, "Thank you."

He looks a bit surprised, but he manages something of a smile and says, "Enjoy your food," before leaving Sirius and I to eat.

"Remind me where Marlene's working again?"

"Her dad made her intern in the Auror Department," I say. I lift a spoonful of soup to my lips.

"That's right. D'you know if they've found my deranged cousin yet?"

I pause. "Who?" James's food is just sitting there, getting cold. I check yet again to see if he's coming, but he's not. Why would he be taking this long?

"Bellatrix Lestrange. I don't suppose you would know her. She was Bellatrix Black, but now she's a Lestrange. I reckon she's in the inner circle of Voldemort now. Last I heard that was the only thing she wanted to do, as my parents often reminded Regulus and I. She was even in the _Daily_ _Prophet_ regarding suspected Death Eater status and some crimes."

"You have a cousin who's a Death Eater?" I ask, shocked.

"Yup, it's what the best of the Blacks do." There's a note of bitterness and something else in his voice that twists my stomach. I feel as if I have to say something.

"Sirius…you know you're not defined by your family, right? You know that just because you're family is a certain way, you're not going to be that way…right?"

He shrugs, not quite meeting my gaze. "But I am. You heard what I told you before. People look at me and see me as a pureblood Black or a blood-traitor Black. There's really no other way around it."

"Well," I say after a long pause, "not me. Me, personally, I see you as something completely different. Completely. Like, not even in the same realm as what those other people see." Sirius looks at me suspiciously. I continue sipping my soup.

"When I see you, I think of some god-awful bloke who's been making me want to perform illegal hexes for years. I think of someone who makes up the most popular gang at Hogwarts. The boy who always finds a way to impress and infuriate Professor McGonagall—at the same time. I see someone impulsive, sarcastic, witty, a pain in the arse, loyal, and bloody annoying." Sirius is smiling by now. "I don't know about you, but I think I've got you pegged pretty well. The rest of those people, they've got nothing on what I know about you."

I dip my spoon back into my soup and bring it up to my lips. I pause when I feel a pair of eyes on me. Sirius's piercing gaze is appraising me critically, the small smile still on his face.

"What?" I say, still slightly leaning forward, the spoon in front of my face. Somehow I know that I never would have said anything like that at school, but since we're not at school…It's as if whenever I'm here in Shrivers I'm freer. I can say and do whatever I want.

Sirius shakes his head. "You're not so bad, Evans."

I have another spoonful of my soup, and feel my cheeks pulling themselves upward in a grin. "You know, I've been told so before," I say cheekily.

Sirius rolls his eyes. "Now I get why—"

"Hey," James says, sliding back into his seat next to me. "Oh, our food is already here?"

I incredulously stare at him. I look at the almost empty bowl of soup in front of me. I glance at Sirius's half-eaten turkey legs. My eyes connect with James's plate of fish and chips. I face James again. "No, the food hasn't come out yet. Sirius and I were just saying how it's taking a bloody long time, weren't we? It's a shame too, because I'm really hungry."

The sound of Sirius's laugh and James saying, "All right, all right, it was just a question…" meet my ears.

"How was Claire?" I ask.

"Fine," James says indifferently while cramming food into his mouth.

"Fine?" Sirius inquires.

"Fine."

My green eyes connect with a pair of striking grey ones, but I quickly glance away from the meaningful look I'm getting.

* * *

><p>The warm breeze gently blows through my hair as I walk across the street, humming to myself. It's a cheery tune, one of the ones that make you want to dance when you hear it. It's also the tune Marlene and I always choose when it comes time to sing the Hogwarts school song. Thoughts of Hogwarts had started filling my head only minutes before, and since then I couldn't stop thinking about all of the things I loved about the place. The school song, the food, the classrooms, the way there's always something new to discover about the castle… And Hogwarts wouldn't be Hogwarts without the gossipy students, Peeves the Poltergeist, and students randomly jinxing each other in the corridors. The real reason I was thinking of Hogwarts—and why I am currently walking towards a specific yellow house—is that I feel woefully unprepared to be Head Girl. I don't know how to handle the job! And I certainly can't just show up the first day of school and hope to have all the plans, announcements, and answers fall into my head! So James and I must plan.<p>

He'll probably call me barmy for coming over this much in advance to plan what we are going to do as Head Boy and Girl, but I don't care. I won't be able to focus on anything else until I at least make a vague outline of everything, and I might as well have my partner make one with me.

I lightly bounce up the white steps of the Potters' porch. I reach my hand out to knock on the door, but out of the corner of my eye I see a light and turn towards it. I make a low shrieking noise when I see Mr. and Mrs. Potter on the porch watching me.

"Goodness, dear," Mrs. Potter says. "There's no need to shriek. We were just about to say hello."

"I'm sorry," I say, walking towards them. "I just didn't see you there and…"

"Don't worry. We didn't even see you come up the steps, let alone down the street."

Mr. and Mrs. Potter are sitting on a brand new porch swing holding hands. They look comfortable, and for a moment, I wonder where they got such a nice piece of furniture as this, then I remember whom they are and what they do. Knowing them, they probably transfigured it from a hairpin or something of the sort.

"Is James here?"

"No, I'm afraid not. He went out with Claire," Mrs. Potter says.

"Did he?" I force out of my mouth.

"Yes, about…an hour ago, I believe."

I was sitting in my room staring at the wall an hour ago. And he didn't come get me. I grit my teeth.

"He said he would only be out for an hour," Mr. Potter says. "He should be back any minute. You can wait with us if you want. Or Sirius is upstairs doing something, we're not quite sure, honestly."

I eye the chair that's across from their porch swing, and then I glance at their linked hands. There's no way I'm going to sit here and intrude on their night. There's also no way that I would go upstairs and hang out with Sirius. James and I may be friends and I may be okay with doing that with him, but not with Sirius.

"No thanks," I say. "I'll probably be on the beach, though. Could you tell him I'm down there when—if he comes back?"

"Sure thing, Lily."

"Bye, Mr. and Mrs. Potter."

I walk along the beach, the sand glistening in the night. Do they have another date? Why would they have another date? They just saw each other at the restaurant! And yeah, okay, James did say later on that he would see her again tonight, but he didn't have to mean that! He already ditched Sirius and me at lunch today, and here he goes off traipsing with Claire, having a good ol' laugh, while poor little Lily walks alone on the beach with no one to hang out with.

I kick some sand and it flies up, splattering my legs and getting in my shoes and between my toes, which just makes me feel more frustrated.

After I walk along the beach for about twenty minutes trying to subside my irrational irritation, I walk back to my house. I suppose James has better things to do tonight.

* * *

><p><strong>Not sure if anyone knows this, but all the items James, Lily, and Sirius ordered at the Cafe are real meals that you can buy at the Three Broomsticks in Orlando, Florida at Universal Studios. Anyone been? :)<strong>

**Hopefull this chapter satisfied you, although I know nothing short of James and Lily getting together was worth the wait. Don't worry, though! We're getting there! I'm really very iffy about Sirius, but I think I wrote him alright. Disagree? How do you portray teenage Sirius? I've seen a lot of fics where he acts as if he just drank four gallons of soda and is super hyper, and I personally don't get that. **

**Please review, it only helps me as a writer. Plus, I think if you're going to go all-out and favorite and alert, it's only polite to give feedback/criticism. Just my opinion, though. I love all readers, reviewers, alerters, and foavriters, though, so don't forget it!**

**See you super soon, I swear,**

**-MG**

**P.S. Sorry there was very little James in this chapter. He'll be back soon, though...**


	16. Breakups and Shakeups

**I shouldn't be updating this. Not at all. I shouldn't have been writing or editing this. I should have been studying for all of my finals, preparing to kick some A on all of them, but when I saw that we had reached 400 reviews (!) I just had to. Not to mention I made you all wait a long, long time for the last chapter.**

**You all bring smiles to my face in this stressful time. youawitchornot [kind of like Hayden Panettiere, except not as tan, and more...natural? I'm bad at putting characters to faces. ;P], alohamora080 [Yes, it's just like Lavender and Ron! Lavender wasn't entirely mean, we just didn't like her because she was...crazy? hah. And same to that feeling...stupid boys.], summertimewriter, softasthunder, YoungAndLiving [:D], Just Another Fan [Props to you for writing and reading in English! You'll improve, no worries!], percabethshamus, isabella, LiveLaughLove53 [Gah, Dramione fics drive me mad too! Like, how could that honestly ever happen? I'm so canon it's ridiculous. Thanks for the review!], starsandthing-s [I'm torturing everyone. :/], AjGirl15, Moonlight Grove [Thanks so much!], Almost Genius [Sirius will set James straight. The other Marauders will appear, albeit vaguely.], PenguinBoxers [the only thing better than Sirius/Lily friendship is Sirius/Lily friendship and Jealous James. ;)], Eligoop, Violingeeknm, thepotionsmaster7 [Yes, yes, yes! Okay, Resolution by WeasleyWannabee is so lighthearted and fun and wonderful, Commentarius by B.C. Daily is hilarious, but it's crazy long and has long updates, A Different View on Love by merlinhelz has a hysterical/interesting plot line, and The Life and Times by Jewels5 is considered the god of all James/Lily fics. Anything in my favorites really. :)], Clarissa Jackson, Skye531 [read on...], semperfortis [they're making one in CA too!], urstory, wingswordsandmetaphors [I wanted to have a fun Sirius, but I wanted a heart-to-heart ish bonding thing, and that won out. Thanks!], BlindMindLover [aw, don't worry, I'm sure you'll get there some way!], HurricaneK, Falling Head Over Heels [it's AMAZING. But it is only a section of universal studios, so if you're not into rides or amusement parks and JUST going for HP world, you might feel like...not that it's a waste of money, but HP world is the icing on the cupcake that is Universal.], PoohBearGoesGangster [he's more of a ladies' man than James, but he's not a jerk to girls. He just likes to have fun.], JackieMooneyLestrange [next chapter, swear!], Avada Kedavra Avada Off [haha, thanks! I like your username. ;D], disney-hp freak, ProudMudblood42, MaryOlivia, SuperCara [ahh, I'm excited for the CA one! :D], cee, Tyem Marodyor [Ack, yes, I did catch those mistakes thanks to you. THANK YOU! Also, Marlene and Sirius did date for a little bit a couple years ago, but it didn't work out..], JazzLunatica, books4evah, Er-my-nee Weasley, Starkidpotter13 [hahahaha, firenze? Goodness, you are good. ;D], Emullz [Lily's just one of those gals who likes to help everybody], Sareface, Eleos [Your reviews are so long and hilarious, you deseve a PM], Rani Jashalithie [They're only just beginning to build the CA one, but I'm excited. :)], AcrossTheWater [same to the CA park!], worldnerd12, StargazerBabells [thank you!], and writergal24. **

**Good grief. Do you see how long that paragraph is? You all are fab, truly. **

**(God, does anyone even read this? xP)**

* * *

><p>Toast or eggs? Eggs or toast? Some of the hardest decisions in life… Eh, both sound good to me.<p>

"Mum, do you want any eggs or toast?" I shout.

"Toast, please!" she hollers back.

"Petunia! Do you want any eggs or toast?"

"No thank you!" she says from her room.

I shrug my shoulders. She probably said no because she thinks I would make it with magic. And we all know that eating food that is made with magic will cause you to grow purple horns out of your head and then speak whale for the next three days before dying a slow and painful death. I internally roll my eyes at her. If she only knew… Anyway, the idea of me making food with magic is ridiculous, because I'm absolutely awful when it comes to mixing magic and food.

I get out the pan and eggs and begin to make one sunny-side-up egg. My dad was the one who taught me how to make eggs that way after I begged him to teach me. I only really wanted to know because I thought the name was funny.

Petunia once told me the bright yellow yolk is the sun, and the rest of the dippy white egg is the clouds that surround the sun. It's stuck with me forever, so now every time I see a sunny-side-up egg at breakfast at Hogwarts, I get a little dose of sadness.

I watch as the egg fries and the pan crackles. I quickly step away to put some bread in the toaster.

Once the egg is done and the pieces of toast are buttered, I sit down at the table with a glass of juice. Mum soon joins me and eats her own toast.

"What do you have planned today, Lily?" she asks.

"Nothing," I say. "I might hang out with Claire…unless you want to do something with Petunia and me?"

"No, no, that's okay. You can be with Claire today and we can do something tonight, okay? I think I'm going to go take a nap anyway. I don't feel very well." As if on cue, she stifles a yawn.

I bite my lip. She does look a bit pale. "Okay."

When my mum and I finish our breakfast, I offer to clean the dishes. Again, I could do this by magic, but there's always the possibility that it will go wrong and soap and water will end up covering the entire room. Plus, sometimes it's peaceful to do things the Muggle way. It gives you a real sense of appreciation. Oh, if only the Slytherins could see me now… They'd have a fit, I tell you!

I'm in the middle of scrubbing the second plate when the doorbell rings. I look down at my hands covered in bubbles and then out of the kitchen doorway.

"Can someone get that?" I shout.

I hear someone open the door and say, "Hello. Come on in." It's definitely Petunia that went to the door. Mum usually greets guests with a "Hi! It's so nice to see you!" Petunia is never very friendly or welcoming. Mind you, she's not rude either, she's just…Petunia. Polite, firm, superior Petunia.

"Lily," my sister calls, "you have a guest."

"Can you bring 'em in here?"

Petunia doesn't answer, but instead leads a brunette into the kitchen. "Hey," I say to Claire over my shoulder. "Thanks, Petunia," I add.

"You're welcome." Then she disappears from the kitchen.

"One sec, Claire." I quickly dry off the plates, silverware, pan, and cups with a rag. I had my hand halfway to my pocket to dry them with magic—which I can actually successfully do…sometimes—when I realized that Claire was still quietly standing behind me.

"What do you want to do today?" I ask her as I put the dishes away in their proper places. "You don't have to work, do you? Because I'm free. James is probably going to do his family thing, but…"

"I don't want to see James," Claire hurriedly says.

"Why not? Is everything okay?"

"James broke up with me last night."

I really don't mean for it to, but my jaw drops. I quickly close my mouth, hoping she hadn't noticed. The last thing Claire needs on top of her assumed anger and sadness is my shock and incredulity.

Claire pulls out one of our wooden chairs and sits at the table. I pull out the one across from her and intently stare at her. "What happened?" I ask. I hope that Claire's not the kind of girl who freaks out after being asked too many questions.

Oh my god. _This_ is why James wasn't home yesterday and why he didn't invite me to go out with him and Claire! He was breaking up with her! Now I'm kind of glad I didn't follow through on that crazy plan I concocted out of anger to go find them and intrude on their date…

She shrugs her shoulders. "I don't know. I don't think anything happened. It's more like something didn't happen. As if all along something was blocking the bridge. Like fighting the waves of the ocean… It's just not possible. You can try, but eventually the waves will keep on washing up shore. James is the waves and I'm…not the shore. Does that make sense?"

Oh, yeah, totally. Let me just write that snippet of poetry down and spend the next hour rearranging the letters to decode what you really mean. Come on, Claire. Tell me what happened!

"No…"

"It just wasn't enough, I suppose." She sighs.

I'm shocked. Is she talking about what I think I'm talking about? I look around to make sure neither Petunia nor my mum are in the vicinity. They aren't.

"What, like, physical stuff?" I ask.

"What? No, nothing like with you and Nate." Claire violently shakes her head. Not what I meant, but all right. "He wanted to snog when we were on dates, I wanted to snog when we were on dates. Nothing like he was…forcing himself on me."

I already knew James wouldn't do anything like that. He would never force himself—physically—on a girl.

"Well then what do you mean by 'it wasn't enough'?" I ask.

To be honest, I'm feeling a little miffed that Claire's basically talking in code. Did she do something wrong? Did he do something wrong? Besides, if some guy just broke up with me, I would hurry up and spit it out so my friend and I could go talk badly about him. If it came down to it, though, I don't know if I would be able to trash talk James.

"_I_ wasn't enough for him. He said he was already in love with someone else."

"He _what_!" I yelp. James IN LOVE? Bloody hell.

"That's what I thought, too," the girl across from me says. "He said, and I quote, 'There's nothing wrong with you, I'm just still in love with a girl from school.'"

I—He—Why would—Merlin's beard...

"I figure it's that Jessica girl," Claire continues. "You know the one you mentioned he dated for a couple months?"

Shite. Claire has a point. Jessica has been the only serious girlfriend that James has ever had. They dated for a good five months. All of the other girlfriends James had had lasted anywhere from one week to two and a half months. Five months was a big deal for him and Jessica. Whoopdeedoo.

But still. Ugh. Jessica? Of all the people James has to _love_, he loves Jessica? _Jessica_? Besides the fact that she's got such a _lovely_ personality, I'm not sure what she's got going for her. Sure, she's kind of pretty, but I know for a fact that she's a fake. Fifth year Marlene and I caught her magically enhancing her undergarments to make her look bustier. God knows what else is fake about her. Well. James might know.

Ew. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth at the thought. Excuse me, Claire, while I try not to gag at the vivid image my malevolent brain is coming up with. But _why_ would he like her? At least Claire is…fun. Jessica's boring! I've never seen him laugh with her. True, I did avoid the two of them like the plague, but if they were laughing and having fun, wouldn't I have seen them? Of course I would have. I just didn't. So he obviously can't have fun with Jessica, not like how he can have fun with me. Or Claire. So what's the point of liking Jessica?

Whatever the reasons, I guess that means James and Jessica will be getting back together when school starts again. On the bright side, maybe now Jessica will stop glaring at me and be a bit nicer. I've heard that people in love are always happier and more cheerful towards others. Not that I would personally know… However, on the dark and gloomy side, she'll probably prance around like last time, bragging about how great of a kisser James is, how he's got amazing muscles, and how funny and charismatic and nice he is…

"What do you think?" Claire asks, interrupting my thoughts.

Should I tell her the truth? I would want the truth, but—in all honesty—I'm tougher than Claire. I might as well, since there's really no more harm to be done. "Yeah, I think that's probably the best guess."

A pair of brown eyes stares down at the table top.

"If it helps, you're, like, ten times prettier than her," I repeat from what she told me the night we ran into Nate at the movies.

Claire obviously remembers, and lifts her head up and smiles at me. "Yeah?"

"Definitely."

Claire looks like she just got a giant dose of happy because the next moment she's smiling and jumping out of her chair. "You know what we need to do?"

"What?" I'm wary of what she's about to say.

"We should go do each other's hair and makeup and find some really cute clothes and then we can go through town and see if there are any single boys!"

I pause. "While that sounds…_fantastic_, Claire, I'm not too sure—"

Claire claps her hands together. "Yes, it would be great! Because you haven't seen a bloke you've liked since Nate, who turned out to be a total prick. You're definitely better off without him. Wait—you haven't seen anyone you liked and haven't told me, have you?" She looks at me suspiciously.

I think and realize that the only guy I've been around is James… And my dad. "Nope."

"Okay, then first things first, we need to find you a man!" Claire walks out of the kitchen and walks up my family's creaky stairs. I follow her until we're in my bedroom, and then I watch her sit in the chair at my "beauty table" as Mum calls it. She picks up a piece of paper. "What's this?"

I recognize it as my Head Girl letter. I run forward and snatch it out of her hands, frightened that she'll see the words 'Hogwarts,' 'Tower,' 'Express,' or 'Order of Merlin' under Dumbledore's name. "Nothing," I try to smoothly say. "Just a letter from Marlene."

"Oh." Claire's eyebrows crinkle. She looks thoughtfully into the mirror, fixing her hair and quietly chewing her lip. God, could this girl make my heart beat any harder? Is she going to question that it's from Marlene? Did she see "only the very best witches get this honor?" Is she going to hate me? Will she tell if she finds out I'm a witch?

If I have to add another person to the list of 'People Who Hate Me Because of Who I Am,' I'm going to Avada Kedavra someone. Just saying.

"I was kind of rude to her, wasn't I?"

"Who?"

"Marlene. When she was here. I was a bitch."

What does a girl say to that? Not really? Completely? "No, Claire, she—" Claire turns to look at me.

"Was being friendly until I turned into a ponce. It's just… She was really pretty, you know? And she mentioned James, and James has talked about her before. He talks about his friends a lot, and you"—I feel a jolt of curiosity—"and Marlene. And I know you, so it's nothing if he mentions the fun you two had back at school—"

We had fun? I mean, sure, I had gotten a laugh when James would embarrass himself or when I would jinx him when he wouldn't stop asking me out, but before this summer, when has he ever had fun with me?

-"but he had mentioned Marlene a couple times, but I didn't even know her, and then she showed up, mentioning James! I guess, well, I suppose I was just jealous," she says sheepishly, still running her hands through her hair. "I just…I really, really liked James, but sometimes I felt like his mind was elsewhere. And meeting her, a friend of James's, just made me mad. I don't know. Would you tell her I'm sorry?"

It's not an entirely sincere-sounding apology, to be honest. But she said it, which is something. "Yeah, I will."

"Thanks, Lils." She twists her body back towards my makeup and jewelry. " Right, well, you're naturally pretty," she says, "so you hardly need any makeup." I smile, all previous thoughts gone and flitting through the air.

"I think this"—she holds out a peachy pink eye shimmer—"would look amazing on your eyelids. And then just put on some gloss and mascara, and you're ready to go!" Oh. Right. Going out because Claire is now single.

While I'm not into the whole let's-spend-all-our-time-making-ourselves-look-good-so-we-can-scope-out-blokes-and-flirt-with-them-even-though-it-will-probably-lead-to-nothing thing, I suppose I can suffer in silence for Claire. Going through a breakup is hard. And while most normal girls would like to eat ice cream and watch sappy films and talk with their friends, like I would probably be doing if, say, James broke up with me, Claire would rather go find new boys. It's who she is. I might as well be agreeable.

I take the mascara, lip balm, and eye shadow that are being held out towards me.

Clair suddenly says, "Do you know what would be the best thing ever? If we met brothers!"

I skeptically look at her.

"No, I'm serious, Lily! That would be so cool!"

I just laugh and say, "Sure thing, Claire," then move over to find some good makeup and jewelry for her.

We end up looking pretty good if I do say so myself. We walk through town and shop a bit and even see Darcie and Katelyn again. We all get a snack together and up until now, Claire and I haven't found a set of single, attractive brothers. However, something tells me she doesn't really mind.

Darcie, Katelyn, and I are sitting at a table eating our ice cream, but Claire is off working her magic.

There is a boy about the age of eighteen behind the counter. Claire told me she found him very good-looking when we walked in, so she went to go talk to him after we ordered. She's been there ever since. (The store is always pretty empty, so he and Claire were able to talk without the guy actually having to work and be distracted.)

I talk with Darcie and Katelyn for a while until they tell me they have to go. Once they leave, I manage to peel Claire away from the boy whose nametag reads 'Conner'.

As we walk home, Claire talks about Conner, how she gave him her phone number, and told him about her parent's restaurant.

Oddly enough, when she cries out, "But I can't believe we didn't find anyone you liked!", I'm not disappointed in the slightest.

* * *

><p>I wake up that night from a nightmare in a cold sweat, my heart pounding.<p>

I dreamed that Voldemort killed my mum, dad, and Petunia by hitting them over the head with a frying pan then sticking them in a tub of bubbles. While the actual dream isn't scary, the idea is. I had been tied to a giant Charms textbook in my dream and I was unable to help them, so I had to sit and watch. I look at my clock on the table beside my bed. It's only one fifty-two.

I try to focus on the ridiculousness of me being tied to a textbook, rather than the fear and despair I had felt in my dream, when my door slowly creaks open. My body freezes. I can feel my heart pounding faster and faster, almost as if it's trying to run away. The door opens all the way and someone walks in, yet I can't tell if it's my mum or dad, or someone sinister. The person gently closes the door, and I realize they don't know I'm awake. While the figure has their back towards me, I silently grab my wand off of my nightstand table and hold it close to me.

The person starts leisurely walking towards my bed, and I try to make my breathing slow and even, as if I'm still sleeping; a feat that's nearly impossible as my heart is beating in my chest so fast it's like I just ran a marathon. Terror tightens its grip on me; I tighten my grip on my wand. It's only when the body is almost directly in front of me do I whip my wand out, point it at him, and think _Lumos!_ in my mind. The light shines brightly into the figures face and I'm shocked to see that it's…

"Put that thing out!" she hisses.

"Tuney?"

"Yes, it's me. Who else do you think it would be?"

I know she won't know or care about what a Death Eater is, and she definitely wouldn't like to learn what it is. "A burglar," I lie. "What are you doing in here?"

"Nothing." But as she says it, she walks around my bed and sits down on the other side. She lifts up the covers and then lies down beside me. She finally pulls the blankets up to her chin and closes her eyes. I stare at her wide-eyed the entire time.

I know she can feel me looking at her, but she chooses to ignore it. Finally, she opens up her eyes and turns her head to look at me. "What?"

"What are you doing in here?" I try to say it as politely as possible. Not that I'm angry she's in my room at two in the morning, I'm just a bit confused. My twenty year old sister who has been as icy to me as an ice cream cone and told me she hates me and doesn't care about me just crawled into my bed. Who wouldn't be a bit puzzled?

Petunia doesn't immediately answer. "I had a nightmare."

I have to repress a smile. I would always be the one to run into Petunia's room and crawl into bed when I was younger. It wasn't my parents I ran to when I was scared. Nope; it was my big sister.

"Me too," I tell her.

I can hear the waves of the ocean outside the house.

"Do you remember when we stayed up all night talking under the covers one summer?" I ask after a while.

Petunia pauses. "We spent the whole night making up stories and plans. Mum was furious when she found out we didn't sleep at all!"

I quietly laugh, and then I hear her giggle join my laughter. I feel a warm, happy feeling spread through my body. Maybe this is Petunia's way to say she's okay with me being a witch. Maybe she's come to accept me for who I am and we can try and be real sisters again…

"I'll never forget the moment we went through her makeup," Petunia whispers. "We looked so awful, and we ruined almost all of it. We used her makeup as if we were painting a picture!"

"But remember when she used to give us those makeovers? And we'd prance around and feel like princesses for the rest of the day. Dad would tell us how pretty we looked and how he was the luckiest man alive to have the three most gorgeous girls in the world in his family!"

I can see a small smile on Petunia's face. "Yeah, I remember."

I smile and think back to all the past summers. We've had some good memories in this place.

"Do you think Mum is going to be okay?" Petunia asks, interrupting my thoughts.

No one in my family has asked the question out loud, but I know it has run through all of our minds at least once. In a way, I'm a bit glad Petunia asked it first. I feel like it would be worse if I asked it.

"I don't know, Tuney," I honestly say. "Part of me thinks she has to be, because she's our mum. But then I get really scared whenever I think of going back to Hogwarts and not being there to help her. You know, I checked to see if the Healers—wizard doctors—at St. Mungo's could do anything to help her, but they don't specialize in—"

"Ugh!" Petunia sat up, suddenly looking very, very angry. "Do you have to talk about that…_stuff_ all the time?"

I feel like if at this moment I can just prove to Petunia that magic isn't bad and that I'm not so different, everything will be alright.

"I don't talk about it all the time, Tuney. But it's who I am and it's a part of me, and you could be a part of it too through me, like Mum and Dad! Magic isn't bad; it's really extraordinary. It's—"

Petunia cuts me off again. "Can't you just forget about it for _once_?" she says irately.

"Forget about it? I can't forget about it! Petunia, I'm not like you, I can't—"

My thoughts go unfinished for a third time. Petunia's face is as flat and emotionless as the next six words come out of her mouth. "I know you're not like me."

And then she gets off of my bed and silently storms out of my room before I can even call her back.

I sit up and look at the dent in my pillow where her head had been. The joyful feeling I had has completely vanished. How could I have been so stupid to bring up magic again? Just when things were turning back to normal, I had to go and ruin it.

I lie back down and feel like I just lost my sister all over again. I grab the pillow she had lied on, hold it to my chest, and curl up in a ball.

I cry myself to sleep while wondering if I'll ever be able to win.

* * *

><p>When I wake up the next morning, I spend what feels like hours just lying in my bed staring at the ceiling. For some time I try and figure out if I just dreamed up the whole incident with Petunia the night before. It wouldn't surprise me. I've had some crazy dreams before, and the idea of Petunia coming into my room and lying in bed with me, seeking comfort is certainly a wild idea. It sounds unrealistic, but then I remember the end. My sister storming out of the room angry after I mention magic isn't unrealistic; it's very, very believable. What's unrealistic is that this is the second time she's genuinely gotten cross at me this summer. Usually we're very pleasant and don't have any spats, but now it's as if no matter what we end up arguing. And I know it's not because of my own accord that we're fighting; if it was up to me, I would never have another fight with Petunia. I just can't understand why everything is changing so much. So maybe it was all a bad dream. Maybe Petunia didn't get upset with me again. Maybe she hasn't been having a short temper with me in regard to almost everything I say. Maybe I still have a chance…<p>

It's only when I finally get out of bed and walk to my mirror do I realize that, indeed, Petunia had come into my room last night seeking comfort and left in anger. My eyes look tired because of the bad sleep I had. I can even see faint tear tracks extending from the corner of my eye across to my temple since I was lying down crying for so long.

I go to the bathroom, shower, and get dressed. It's only when I'm walking back to my room do I notice that the sky is full of dark grey clouds and it's raining. Good, now the weather matches my mood.

I flop back down on my bed and grab _A Tale of Two Cities_. I had neglected reading it so much this summer. I usually finish this book in two weeks, and now five weeks after I started it, I still haven't finished.

I try to lose myself in the world of old England and France, but I can't focus. My mind keeps drifting, and I find myself thinking about my family and Hogwarts and my friends while listening to the pitter-patter of the rain.

The front door opens downstairs, but I'm not very curious to see who it is. I don't think I can face Petunia now. Will she pretend nothing ever happened and act the same, or will she be even worse because I ruined a perfectly good sister moment?

"Lily…" someone croaks. I sit up and walk into the hall. "Lily!" Mum calls again.

I walk down the stairs and I see my mum, but she doesn't look good. Her hair and light summer jacket are dripping with water. But even worse, her face is white and her eyes are red rimmed, almost as if she had been drinking the night before or crying for a while. Knowing my mother, I go with the latter.

"Mum, what's wrong?"

My stomach fills with dread. I feel like it's going to fill me up and pour out like vomit. My face and armpits break out into a sweat. There is a possibility that Mum could have just found out that her favorite restaurant is closing, but I already know it's not that. It's worse; it's so much worse.

My mum just shakes her head and I see her eyes are sparkling with unshed tears now. She turns and walks into our living room and sits down on the couch as if she can't stand on her own anymore. I wouldn't be surprised if it was true.

"Is it Dad? Petunia? Are Dad and Petunia okay?" I ask with urgency evident in my voice.

I try not to think it, but if anything happened to Petunia, it would have happened while she was irate with me. What if our last words to each other were angry words? How could anything happen before we fixed everything? It wouldn't be fair!

Mum nods her head. "Fine…they're f-fine."

I breathe a bit easier. But then…why is she crying? And one millisecond before she says it, I can feel in my gut that I already know.

"Mr. Potter passed away."

* * *

><p><strong>That was terrible of me, I know. Absolutely terrible. No fear, I know what I'm doing.<strong>

**On the bright side, Claire and James broke up!**

**On another negative side, no James in this chapter, sorry. :/**

**I have sufficently avoided studying for my exams. Pray I don't get an Ts on them! And to everyone else who is studying/preparing/procrastinating studying for finals, good luck, and just think to yourself: WWHD? What Would Hermione Do?**

**;)**

**-MG**


	17. Promise

**Thanks to the good wishes on all my finals! I got Os on all of them. Hermione would be proud. Ron would be scandalized. ;)**

**Thank you:**

**The Bitch Next Door, Geoo' 97 (really? Well, I'm glad you like mine, but that's surprising you like so few J/L. I LOVE them!), jwtwifan (haha, sounds better than studying!), I-Siriusly-Love-Black, Grecia, roflshvuakomail (Thanks! :D), Er-my-knee Weasley (I never would've heard the end of that, would I?), Nightlight753 (hope you did well!), Avada Kedavra Avada Off (really? Aha, that's funny. They reeaalllyy annoy me...), JazzLunatica (he's one of the better James, for sure, but I still don't see him as being "James."), AjGirl15, PenguinBoxers (A story isn't complete without some angst and death! ;D haha, just kidding), (not too sad, though, no worries!), Blair P (thank you! :D), Hecate'sMushroomMinions (thanks!), SeriouslySiriusBlack (;D), semperfortis, alohamora080, Sammy-U, AcrossTheWater, writergal24 (hahaha, sounds EXACTLY like something I would do! And yes, duh, can't you tell this is a Marlene/James story? ;P), LiveLaughLove53 (Thanks! Lucky, I want a winter dance! Hope you had fun!), Shadows of Snowfire, Stroke of Coffee (ksjhdskjfhd. I hate that moment. D:), percabethshamus, isabella, 22potterfan, BlindMindLover (of course!), Stroke of Coffee (Haha, me too. What a pureblood.), thatweasleykid, wingswordsandmetaphors (It was bound to happen, but good on you for assuming right!), AriannaSaffyreMalfoy, softasthunder, yellow14, Emmulz (Jessica was James's ex gf and Lily's dormmate. :P I always think that he went out with other girls, but never anything serious because it always came back to Lily. More on that later.), lilybethluna (course!), worldnerd12, Thepinkhouseowner (oh gosh! I would be so angry! Hopefully you get another shot, and feel better too! :), sephiesport, PhoenixOfIce, Eligoop, Almost Genius (right!), MaryOlivia, markf50, Rani Jashalithie, FreezingPenguins, YourAngelicVampyre (very, very good guesses), L'amour est vie (This is probably the biggest James related debate of FF, but I've read that JK made James a Chaser, and the movies put that in for dramatic effect, and James carried a Snitch because he'd look silly with a Quaffle. I'm just going to stick with Chaser, but it doesnt really matter!), Starkidpotter13, Tyem Marodyor, Moonlight Grove (I know, I'm sorry. There's not enough fluff here for the romantics, and in all honesty this is more the beginnings of their relationship than the deep fluffy stuff. I'm glad your enjoying it, though. :), Super Cara, StargazerBabells (Ahh, thanks! And I'm sorry you stayed up late! Haha, FF does that to me ALL the time.), urstory, xjustarandomreaderx (I hate gift wrapping, so I feel for you. Thanks!), and Falling Head Over Heels.**

**I wish there was an American to British google translation.**

* * *

><p>My head begins to spin and I feel woozy.<p>

This can't be happening. It can't happen to James and Mrs. Potter. It's not true.

But it is. And I know it is.

I sit down in a chair and look at my mum. A few tears have escaped from her eyes and are now falling down her face. "What happened?" I ask once I find my voice. "How do you know?"

It takes Mum a moment to answer, and her first few words are shaky, but then her voice becomes even. "Ella was supposed to come over so we could go out for breakfast this morning, but she was a little late. She's usually very punctual, but I didn't think anything of it. Only when her lateness turned into ten minutes, then twenty, and then finally thirty did I get a bad feeling. I went over to their house and knocked, but no one answered. I got a really bad feeling, Lily. Almost as if I had to stay there and make sure she was okay. I rang the doorbell a couple times and then someone finally peeked through the little window. I don't remember what they're called exactly…elves?"

"House-elves," I automatically say.

"Yes, well, Ella introduced me to their house-elf, Pinka, one day and she said it was just like a maid or a cook. We even taught Pinka how to cook like we do."

If Mum had told me any other day that a Muggle and a witch were teaching a house-elf how to cook without magic, I would have laughed. But not today. Not now.

"Pinka knew who I was, so she opened the door and quickly ushered me inside. Just from the empty house I knew something was wrong, so I said, 'Pinka, where is everyone?' And her large eyes filled up with tears and she told me how"— my mother hiccups—"Ella woke up this morning and—and—Charles had passed away in his sleep. They think it was a heart attack, but Ella didn't even know until this morning. It looked like he was just sleeping, but he wouldn't wake up."

I can feel myself tearing up now, and I hardly knew Mr. Potter. Mum went got friendly with him, so she has good reason to cry. In all honesty, I didn't really know James's dad. Those few times I talked with him, though, he always made me smile and was very kind. I try and imagine what it would be like to wake up and find your husband, your true love, dead. I see myself with wrinkly skin shaking a pale body that is—oddly—an elderly James, messy hair and all. My stomach curls in horror at the thought of having to start a morning like that.

"I thought he had more time," I say hoarsely. "I thought he had until the end of the summer. James said—he said he had the summer. The Healers—the doctors—they said he had more time. He was supposed to spend the summer with his family! _All_ of it…"

"Oh, honey, I know," Mum coos. She opens her arms and I sit next to her, resting my head on her shoulder with her arms wrapped around me. "Sometimes it's just people's time to go. There's not always an explanation behind it."

We're quite for a moment, but I can only think of one thing.

"Did you see Mrs. Potter and James? How are they?"

Mum releases me to try to wipe the tears from her eyes, but it's useless. New ones replace the ones she had removed.

"Pinka let me wait for them in their house, but barely fifteen minutes later had they returned. Came back from the hospital, I think. Ella saw me and she started crying harder, but James ran out of the house. He hasn't come back since. I just left because Ella said she was going to try and contact some of his friends and see if he was there, and I came back to ask if you had seen James. Have you…?"

I shake my head and my heart hurts. I can only imagine what James feels like. I see my mum silently cry even more, while I try to stifle my tears. I'm unsuccessful. I have the sudden urge to help James. He may not want my help, just like he did not want me the night I overheard him talking to Sirius, but I have to try.

But where is he? It's very likely that he'd go to Sirius's. I'm sure James could storm around and scream or sit and cry all he wanted there. I already know that James wouldn't do something like that, though. Maybe the screaming and stomping, but not the crying. Do guys even sit around and cry and comfort each other? Best friends or not, I'm having trouble seeing James and Sirius doing that. James would be angry, bitter. I remember the night he told me about his father and while I know he was hurting on the inside, he refused to show it. What would James do in this situation, though?

When he's angry and upset, James flies and throws around Quaffles. There was this one time in our fifth year when James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter had gotten into a huge fight, although it was mainly between James and Sirius, oddly. I, unfortunately, knew what had caused it: Sirius had told Severus about Remus transforming into the Shrieking Shack. And James had saved Severus's life. Still, James had been so upset; he practically walked bowlegged after he got off because he had been on a broom for so long. James even told me that when he needs to blow off some steam, he flies. But he can't go flying here. He'd get into so much trouble, and—

The cave.

It instantly flies to me, and I stand up. He would be away from people, away from hiding his emotions and I did tell him that it was the perfect place to get away when you needed to. He's not supposed to go there, and his dad specifically told him not to, but wouldn't that make an angry James want to go there more?

"I think I know where he is," I tell my mum. "Will you be okay here?"

She sniffles and nods her head. I grab a random jacket from the downstairs closet and throw it on before stepping out into the rain. I start to walk towards the cave. Once I'm away from the houses, I try and strain my eyes far down the beach for people, but I see no one. I begin to sprint.

When I reach the cave, I carefully walk into it and then around the corner. I see the back of James's familiar head facing me. He's sitting at the edge of the pool of water. I breathe a sigh of relief and start to walk towards him, but he hears me and turns around. His face is not shiny with tears, and his eyes are not puffy or red. His face is blank, guarded, and shows no emotion upon seeing me. And then after being blank, it's irritated. He's irritated at me.

"You can leave, Evans. I'm fine."

He's called me Evans so many times. Usually he's been flirting with me; it's recently been friendly; and maybe once or twice he's said angrily. This was by far the worst way he's ever said it. His voice is flat, but it has an edge to it. An edge as sharp as a butcher's knife. It's as if he would like nothing more in life than to never see me again.

I'm tempted to turn around, to accept defeat, but I know better. He's hiding behind a mask. A mask that's made of goblin armor. He may yell and get angry with me for staying, but it would be better than he hating me for leaving him alone.

I slowly make my way towards him and sit next to him. I don't say anything. I stare straight ahead like he is doing. I wait for him to speak. He doesn't. Before I realize what I'm doing, my hand reaches out and grabs one of his hands. My fingers intertwine with his, and I realize that his hands are ice cold. He stiffens a bit, but he doesn't say anything. When he doesn't throw off my hand, my other one reaches out, too. My two hands encircle his one hand, and while I've had to turn my body slightly so it will be less uncomfortable, I still don't look at him.

Only when I feel his gaze on me do I look at him. Five seconds after my green eyes meet his multi-colored ones, the mask crumbles. His mouth makes a grimace and I see exactly how much pain he's in just by looking into his eyes. I feel my eyes start to water and I act instinctively. I do it to comfort James, but in doing so I get a bit of comfort myself.

I pull him into a hug.

The way we're positioned makes it quite painful for me. His arms are wrapped around me, just like mine are around him. Not tightly, but there. My right arm is bent out at an awkward angle. His head hangs onto my shoulder and I can feel tears falling down his face onto some of my exposed skin. I mostly feel my shirt slowly getting damper. His glasses are also poking the flesh between my neck and collarbone. But the second I notice that James's body is slightly shaking with sobs, I don't move a single centimeter. My pain is nothing compared to his.

James has surprised me a lot this summer. His longing to be friends, lack of judgment on Katelyn, desire to wait for the right girl and willingness to help me has left me shocked numerous times. And while I always figured that James is about as predictable as his and his friends' next prank, I never expected to see him cry. James has always been tough and brave. He didn't cry. The idea simply never crossed your mind. Almost as outrageous as the thought of James crying in front of someone would be the idea of me comforting him while he cried.

Yet here we sit with tears streaming down our faces.

* * *

><p>This is the first—and worst—wizard funeral I've been to. No, it's not poorly set up or a bad way to remember Mr. Potter. In fact, it's a very nice funeral considering that it's occurring a mere two days after Mr. Potter passed away. (I'm not sure if the little time between Mr. Potter's death and burial is a wizard thing or a Potter thing.) It's on the Potters' property where they have a graveyard filled with quite a few Potters. The coffin is very ornate, but still reminds me of Mr. Potter in some odd way. There are chairs for everyone, and the sun is even shining. It makes the gloomy day a bit brighter, but you can see a few of the older people sweating in their robes. It's just an awful funeral because it's for one of my friend's dad. And every time I think about how James is feeling and what if that was me in his position, I feel my throat close up and my eyes burn: the sign I'm about to cry.<p>

I'm wearing Muggle clothes along with Mum and Dad. I wasn't going to force them into any wizard robes (as if I even had some for them), and it would make them more uncomfortable if they were the only people in their type of clothing, so I picked out a boring black Muggle dress with black heels. Everyone else here is in wizard clothes.

Mum, Dad, and I just arrived at the Potters. I tried to use as little magic as possible to get them here, but we still ended up having to take the Knight Bus and walk a bit. Petunia didn't come. I don't think she was even invited.

My parents go to find some seats and I go to find someone I know.

A fair amount of people are here to pay their respects to Mr. Potter. I expect it's because he was pretty important working in the Ministry, but I also hope that all these people really know and like the Potters. Not too many of the guests are crying, although everyone looks very downcast. Mrs. Potter is at the front talking to a few witches and wizards who are giving their condolences.

I don't see a familiar head of black hair anywhere.

It's only when I'm about to consider the possibility that maybe James is hiding out somewhere that I find the four boys huddled off to the side. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter are all wearing black robes and are intently talking to one another. I want to go say hello, but I turn to go back to my parents instead.

I'm probably not welcomed anyway. And I don't really want to intrude. James chooses this moment to look up, though, and he sees me. He waves me over. Dang. I walk over and lightly smile at the boys.

Since Remus is the one I'm the closest with out of the three other Marauders, he steps forward first and gives me a hug.

I hug Sirius next.

After I hug him, he smiles at me and says, "Looking good, Evans."

I force a laugh, but I notice that the smile doesn't reach his eyes. I'm sure mine doesn't either.

"Not too shabby yourself, Black."

Sirius just shrugs in a way that says 'What can I do?'

I say hi to Peter and give him a hug as well.

I don't know why I'm hugging the small blonde boy. I hugged Remus because he's my friend and Sirius because it's practically his own dad that's died, and maybe because we're sort of friends. I guess I just hug Peter because he seems nice enough.

I stand between Sirius and Remus.

What do I say? Usually at the very beginning of the school year I say something like "Doing well, Sirius/Remus/Peter/James?" And that's IF I even greet them. I can't say that here obviously. It's a funeral! I have the mad urge to crack a joke because I'm not used to seeing these four boys so serious.

Especially Sirius. Sirius is never serious. Although Sirius was serious that one time when Sirius and James got into that serious fight. Sirius was so seriously serious.

I have to turn around and cover my ridiculously large grin with my hand. Why am I laughing? Am I finally cracking from all those late nights doing homework and talking with my roommates? Why do I have the most preposterous desire to just laugh!

Oh my god. Merlin, please don't let me say or do anything highly inappropriate today. Please, please, please.

I try to think of sad things—Petunia storming out on me, Voldemort killing people, Mum getting even more sick, Mr. Potter—and the humor leaves me real quick. I manage to turn back into the group. All the boys are talking as if they didn't notice me acting odd. I don't doubt it. It's nothing out of the usual, is it?

But once they keep talking about things I have no way to contribute to the conversation (Quidditch, Sirius's flat, Peter's mum), I decide that I'm just going to go and sit with my parents. "I'm going to go," I quietly say, and then I leave. I don't get far before a hand has grabbed my hand, though. I turn around to see that it's James.

"I'm sorry we were ignoring you. You can stay."

"Oh, no, it's okay, I'm just going to go back," I say. I notice that Sirius, Remus, and Peter are all curiously watching James and me. Great.

James's grip tightens on my hand just a little bit, but I notice. I glance down at his hand wrapped around mine. It feels warm. "Please stay with me," he says. I look up at his face, and he looks like a lost boy the age of five. How can I just leave? I can't. So I don't. Something changed with us that day in the cave when I comforted James while he cried. I promised James I'd be there for him. A promise I'm determined to keep.

"All right." I walk back towards my fellow Gryffindors with him. I release my hand from his grasp, but he just grabs it again and holds it. I don't object.

The shock is prevalent on the three boys' faces. Sirius's eyes are wide, Remus's mouth is actually hanging open, and Peter is looking back and forth from James and I to Remus and Sirius to gauge their reactions. Their expressions slightly reflect what I feel on the inside at walking with James while holding his hand, but I know it's not like that. James just needs human contact, someone to hold him. He'd look a bit silly holding Sirius's or the other guys' hand, and his mum is busy talking and trying to keep it together. So that leaves me. He's only holding my hand because he needs someone to cling to. But then why is my heart erratically beating inside my chest?

A soft, sad piece of music appears to sound from the air to signal that the ceremony is going to start. James's hand tightens around my own. All five of us stand there, until—in unison—Peter, Remus, and Sirius turn to go to their seats. James and I are left standing there holding hands. It feels more intimate now, holding his hand, and I casually drop it, although a part of me doesn't want to.

"I'll see you afterwards," I tell him.

"You can sit up front with me, if you'd like," he says. I look to the front and see Mrs. Potter, Sirius, an open seat for James, and a couple other people I assume to be relatives. It's tempting, mostly because I'll feel like a traitor for leaving James, but I'm not meant to be up there. I shake my head.

"No, you go sit with your mum and Sirius. I'll wait for you at the back." James looks like an upset child again. I grab his hand and give it a reassuring squeeze before he walks to his seat.

The ceremony is nice, but I'm in a daze throughout the whole thing. I notice that they use some magic, but it has the same general factor my grandparents' funerals had: sadness. It's all just really sad. I try to watch James and Sirius, and I occasionally catch a glimpse of them along with Mrs. Potter. She cries. I'm not surprised. But she does hold her head high. I don't know if I could hold my head high in her position. I see James angrily wipe his face a couple times, and I'm willing to bet my favorite pair of shoes that he's frustrated at himself for crying and not being strong. No one's judging him, though. Especially not me. My heart nearly breaks when I glance at Sirius and also see tears on his face. Just a few, but they're there. Sirius, who escaped from an awful family and was made an honorary Potter, from spending summers, Christmases, and Easters with James and his family. I've even seen Mr. and Mrs. Potter saying the same good-bye to Sirius on the Platform on September first they had just said to their own son.

I'm not sure how long it takes, but it's over. The casket is in the ground and grass is smoothly laid on top of it. It looks like it's been there forever. James and his mum walk to the back and stand behind all the seats. They're thanking everyone for coming and the people are supposed to give their commiseration as they walk back towards the Potter manor. Everyone was invited for refreshments afterwards up at their house. Judging from the many ruddy faces in the head, I'm sure everyone is going to take that offer.

Mum, Dad, and I wait in the slow line and finally meet Mrs. Potter and James. My mum gives Mrs. Potter a long hug and then hugs James. My dad hugs Mrs. Potter as well, but shakes James's hand. I awkwardly hug Mrs. Potter, but when I reach James I wrap my arms around him and hug him really tight. He wraps his arms around my waist. My chest is pressed against his hard, smooth one and I feel his heart beat. We simultaneously let go after what feels like a while, and I walk to where my parents are waiting for me.

"You can go ahead," I tell them. "I'm going to wait for James." My father nods and then wraps his arm around my mum and leads her to the Potter's enormous stone house.

It takes a while, but I hold it out and wait. Just like I told James I would. Mrs. Potter eventually leaves while talking with some old lady. It's just James and I now. He walks up to me.

"Thanks for waiting," he says. He runs his hands through his hair. I notice that his friends already went up, but I get the feeling that he told them to. I know that they would have waited for James if he wanted them to. They would wait for hours through thunderstorms and blizzards if it were what James wants, just because he's James and they are them.

"Sure," I say. We slowly start walking across the grass. "You okay?"

"Yeah." James reaches out and takes my hand in his once again. He grips it tight, as if he's afraid I'll let go, and softly and casually grazes his thumb across my hand. My stomach twists in knots, but I don't think they're uncomfortable knots. But aren't all knots uncomfortable? I think the very definition of a bodily knot eradicates the possibility of comfort. The farther we walk the more sure I am that this doesn't feel uncomfortable, though. Have I been confused my entire life on the definition of a bodily knot? Are they in actuality comfortable? Or are just James Potter-related bodily knots comfortable?

We don't say anything until we go inside his house, and then he drops my hand. There are a lot of people packed in the "house," and I can't help staring around in awe. Their house is _huge_. You could have forty people living in it at once, and I bet they wouldn't be the least bit squashed. I look up and see a beautiful glass chandelier hanging in the foyer. I freeze for a moment and gaze at the ceiling with my mouth slightly open until I hear a chuckle.

I glance around and James is smiling at me. And he laughed. I smile really wide at him.

He turns and leads me towards the table with the food, and I fill my plate up. James does as well. We get some glasses of Butterbeer and I check on my parents. They're in love with the food. Mum has a glass of Butterbeer and keeps exclaiming over it. "It's so delicious, Lily! Why haven't you ever bought us some? Imagine if I could turn this into a cake flavor…I wonder what's in it…"

We finally leave my parents and locate Sirius, Remus, and Peter. I'm not surprised that Remus is throwing grapes in the air at odd angles for Sirius to catch in his mouth. Peter keeps encouraging Remus to try and make it harder since Sirius catches every one with apparent ease. James sees them and smiles again. He raises his wand and flicks it at a grape that is midair towards Sirius's mouth. Right before it falls in, the small fruit turns a bright orange. Sirius's eyes bulge open once his teeth bite into the fruit, and he makes a face of absolute disgust. He looks around for a napkin, but then he's forced to swallow it. He rounds on James.

"Prongs!" Sirius tries to punch James, but James easily slides to his side, knocking into a man. He doesn't even notice. When the man turns around with a questioning look on his face, I apologize for James and Sirius.

The two boys try and dodge and pelt one another with grapes for a good ten minutes. Peter watches in amusement before Sirius throws a grape at him and he joins in the fight, while Remus and I roll our eyes and then strike up a conversation. In time they stop, and the four of us talk about the coming year and James's appointment of Head Boy. None of them are very shocked that I became Head Girl; Sirius, however, takes the opportunity yet again to express his astonishment over James receiving the title of Head Boy. He claims he fainted when he heard. I'm glad that James isn't sullen and moody the entire time, although I can tell he's still upset. I know the other guys can, too. But I am surprised at how much fun it is to be with those four. Even though we're at the after party of a funeral, they make me laugh quite a bit.

When it comes time to say good-bye, I'm generally sad to see them go. Especially James.

"Are you and your mum coming back to the beach house?" I ask him right before I leave.

He shrugs his shoulders. "I don't know. Maybe. We'll have to come back to get our stuff of course."

I nod, but I already know that the chances of James and Mrs. Potter finishing out the summer across the street from my family are very slim. And I can't help but feel extremely saddened by this.

* * *

><p><strong>I won't update until the end of Christmas, so Merry Christmas everyone! Enjoy your break, and remember the reason for the season. :)<strong>

**Also, just letting you guys know that I all of a sudden got this huge bit of excitement for this story again, so that's good. No promises, but chapters should generally pop out quicker.**

**Thanks to alerters, favoriters, and reviewers! :D**

**MG**


	18. The Boring Way It Was

**I hope everyone's been having a good holiday! **

**Much thanks to:**

**Skye531 (wow, late exams!), larubita, team., xxocarlee, softasthunder, LiveLaughLove53 (thanks! suggestions always welcome :D), SiriuslySiera, yumyumdimsum, marinewife08 (thanks! and yes, they are the BEST Christmas presents), writergal24 (Marlene and James are my OTP. I just can't get enough of them.), summertimewriter, YoungAndLiving (LOVE that song!), WillowBee (we're not quite there yet...soon, though!), percabethshamus (welcome! it drives me mad when writers don't update regularly. or ever for that matter...), out-woop-woop, bakemeapie (thank you so much! :3), ElektricCurrent, Fangalitious, DreamASweetDream, RagnorakxKitty, Super Cara (I believe it's in 5th year, because in the Prince's Tale Lily told Severus that he was being "really ungrateful" and that she had heard James had saved Snape at the Whomping Willow. And that was before the Mudblood thing, which was at the end of their 5th year), KAT M, head-forever-in-the-clouds (I'm so glad you've been a regular reader and are enjoying this story! :), Blair P, semperfortis (thank you! really, if you just see any mistakes or words that have better meanings in British, PMing me or saying it in a review and correcting me would be fantastic. :), roflshvuakomail, PhoenixOfIce (thanks! :), yellow14, Rani Jashalithie, Falling Head Over Heels (It totally would be), lilybethluna, PenguinBoxers, Noelle D, AcrossTheWater, StargazerBabells (thank you so much! :), JackieMooneyLestrange (I'm PMing you ASAP), urstory, Gray Fedora (Gosh, I hate it when I get pizza on my cheeks. ;P), BlindMindLover (whew, thanks, glad to hear that!), Sweets5236, Lovely Girthls, , Blue Wrackspurts, jwtwifan (Don't study! Read fanfiction and watch HP movies! Whoo! JK, you should totally study and ace EVERYTHING.), Almost Genius (Umm..haha, not quite sure exactly, but James basically made the grape turn super sour and rotten), Avada Kedavra Avada Off (yeah, a lot of people just want fluff fluff fluff, and while I love fluff, I like reading/writing the relationship/friendship building for this couple more. :), Er-my-nee Weasley, ButlersTheJob, Happy Pineapple, alohamora080 (about...four more chapters, I believe. Thanks!), Kenzieloveify, AjGirl15, The Bitch Next Door, Geoo'97 (really? I LOVE TLAT, but are you just really picky or have you not found many good L/J? I hope you feel better adn had a Merry Christmas!), and xXjaziXx (hahahaha, okay, only because of your absolutely ridiculous review. ;D).**

**Also, we've reached over 500 reviews! AHHH! Thank you everyone reviewing, as well as the alerters and favoriters, because I have a crazy number of those too! Good crazy of course.**

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><p>After Mr. Potter's funeral, things return to the way they were before. Sort of.<p>

When my parents and I get back home the evening of the funeral, Petunia tells me that Claire had stopped by. I don't have the energy to talk with Claire, though; I just go to my room. I'll see her tomorrow.

I was the one who had told Claire Mr. Potter had passed away. She was a bit put out that James hadn't told her, but I reminded her that his dad just died so he didn't really want to talk to anyone; she shut up after that.

James had later told her there wasn't going to be a funeral for Mr. Potter. Mum and Dad could go to Mr. Potter's funeral because they're a part of our world, but Claire couldn't have gone. Ex-girlfriend or not, we haven't known her long enough to be able to tell her about us and Hogwarts. Plus, I already have the feeling that she wouldn't be able to keep something like this a secret. I know James feels the same. Thus I came up with the story of Mr. Potter being cremated and there being no funeral.

James had gone over and told Claire about the lie. I had told her about Mr. Potter dying, and I would have been happy to tell her that there was not going to be a funeral, but James went and talked to her after I suggested the cremating fib. I think it was the first time they had talked since they had broken up. I don't know what happened when James went to see Claire.

The curiosity of what could have happened had bothered me more than I care to admit, but now that the funeral has passed, those curiosities seem completely ignorant. I shouldn't be thinking about those things. And if, for example, James and Claire had snogged, what would it matter to me? The two of them snogging wouldn't bother me at all. Claire had her eyes on a new guy, anyway, and James wasn't staying.

Or so I thought.

The morning subsequent to the funeral I wake up to find Mrs. Potter and Mum in the kitchen drinking tea and eating lemon muffins.

"Hi, Mrs. Potter," I say. I'm unsure of what to do. Would smiling make her angry? Like, no one should smile because her husband's dead? Or would being gloomy make her realize how sad she really is?

I decide to smile. A smile's never done any harm, right?

Mrs. Potter smiles back. Her eyes still look sad, but it looks like she's handling everything relatively well.

"Good morning, Lily," she says to me.

"Are you saying good-bye?" I glumly ask. I like Mrs. Potter. I like that she's been a good friend and distraction to my mum. I don't want her to go. And I like James. I have fun with him. I'm not ready to give up on this summer friendship we have. I don't want them to leave.

Mrs. Potter shakes her head. "No, we're going to finish the summer here, like we planned."

I can't keep the smile off my face. "Really?"

"Really."

"Good! Is James…?"

I don't know what I'm going to ask, but Mrs. Potter answers the unthought-of question anyway.

"James is spending the day at Sirius's. Maybe the next day as well."

"Oh, right…" Of course he'd go to Sirius's. He'd want to be with his best friend. He wouldn't want to be at some dumb beach.

I get some breakfast before leaving the room, and as I'm doing so I hear my mum say something that sounds like an invite for James and Mrs. Potter to visit over Christmas break.

After I get my shoes, I walk back into the kitchen.

"I'm going to go see Claire," I tell Mum at a pause in their conversation.

"Okay," she says.

And because I'm feeling sentimental, I walk over and hug her.

I see her smile as I walk out of the kitchen. Before I reach the doorway, though, I pause. I turn back and hug Mrs. Potter as well. She seems surprised, but pleased. She pats my arm.

"Bye, Mum. Nice seeing you, Mrs. Potter," I say as I walk out of the room.

"Same to you, Lily," Mrs. Potter says.

I walk down the streets to Claire's house and try to take everything about this place in. Before I know it, I'm at Claire's. I find Claire's abnormally tall, frazzled father and ask him if Claire's there.

"Claire? Here? No, I don't know, Lily." He looks around and finds a girl with an apron talking to Felicity Jorgens. Neither one of them had acknowledged me when I walked in. "Monica! Your break was over five minutes ago!" Mr. Hyde turns back to me. "She went out with some boy, I'll tell her you stopped by." And before I can utter a single word, he hurries off to yell at the waitress, Monica.

I trudge back home.

Dad's not home, Petunia returned to her icy demeanor, Mum's with Mrs. Potter, Claire's with Conner, Marlene is working, and James is at Sirius's.

I have absolutely no one to hang out with. This is the perfect opportunity that I've been avoiding to do my homework.

Dammit.

* * *

><p>The next few days continue on the same. Mum's always either with Mrs. Potter or resting in our house. Sometimes I'll join them if they're at my house, but I usually let them do their own thing.<p>

Petunia's been doing…whatever she does. Seriously, I don't know what it is. Maybe work for her university, maybe writing to Vernon. She could be plotting a siege on Hogwarts for all I know. I wish her luck if that were what she's planning.

Annoyingly enough, Claire goes out a lot with Conner. Before James dumped her, she could hang out with me and her boyfriend. It was like hitting two Bludgers with one bat. That doesn't work very well now. I've only officially met Conner once when the three of us went to the beach. It was awful. Hanging out with Claire and James at the same time was easy; hanging out with Claire and Conner was atrocious. They had flirted, teased one another, and basically ignored me. Afterwards I had told Claire that she and Conner could have their alone time from now on. What I wanted to say was, "Being with you and Conner sucks. I refuse to hang out with you both."

She had thought that was a great idea.

Now I only see Claire one-third as often as before since her time's split between more work at the restaurant, Conner, and me.

Mum tells me James is home now, but I don't go get him. I wait for him to get me. I don't know how long he needs to be alone to grieve.

Sometimes, though, when I've sat inside and watched television program after television program, I just want to march over and tell James to hurry the hell up and come join the real world again because his mum already has. But then I feel like an awful friend, so I flip the channel or go to the beach by myself.

The fest is in town now and I go with Mum, Dad, and Petunia one day. It's fun, but Mum can't go on hardly any of the rides, Dad doesn't like to, and Petunia doesn't like me, so it wasn't as exciting as it could've been. It's still a nice day, though, since there's always entertainment and good food.

One evening I come back inside dripping saltwater to see my mum waiting for me.

I had made sure that I was on a deserted part of the beach before casting the Bubble-Head Charm and diving in to the water. I'd spent about three hours just swimming around in the ocean, only coming up a few times. The ocean's pretty calm here so I swam out farther than I've ever swum. I had my wand on me as well, so if anything serious did happen, I could use magic for help. And while nothing serious did happen, I decide not to tell my mum about my adventure.

I try to hide my wrinkly fingers as I say, "Hey, what's going on?"

"Get your shower and then we can have leftovers for dinner and go see a movie with Petunia. We can have a girl's night tonight!"

I nod and then go upstairs to shower. When I come downstairs, I see only my mother in the living room reading a book.

"Where's Petunia?" I ask.

"She went to go get some milk since we're out, as well as a few other groceries."

"Okay," I say. I go to the kitchen and find some leftover quiche. I give myself a generous helping and get a glass of water before heading back into the living room. I sit in my favorite chair and begin to eat. We hardly ever have this type of "dinner".

"Lily?" my mum says, looking up from her book.

"Mmm?" I quickly chew and swallow the food that's in my mouth.

"Mrs. Potter says that James has just been sitting in their house these few days."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

"I think Mrs. Potter would like it if you went over and got James to go do something," Mum says.

"Well I _would_," I say, "except I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't think he wants to see me. I mean, he's been gone all this time and his dad just died and he left for Sirius's as soon as he could and Mrs. Potter probably had to force him to come back here. I just don't think he wants to see me."

"I don't think so, Lily," my mum says.

"Well I do. If he wanted to see me, he'd have been here by now. I'm just going to wait for him."

"That's not what Mrs. Potter said."

Before I have time to object, my mum continues saying, "Besides, your father and I saw you two holding hands at Charles's funeral. After that you should—"

I'm irritated that my mum brought up us holding hands. But more than that, I'm embarrassed.

"_He_ was holding _my_ hand!" I declare. "And you and Dad shouldn't be spying and watching me—"

Mum laughs. "We weren't spying, Lily! We just saw you two! Don't get so cross with me. All I'm saying is that I think you're waiting for James to pull himself together and start doing things normally again, when all he may really want is for someone to go get him and force him out of the house to get his life right. And you're perfectly capable of doing that. Take him to the fest tomorrow or something."

She has a point.

I sigh. "Fine, okay, I'll go see him tomorrow. Sorry I snapped at you."

Petunia walks in through the front door at that moment. "Hello? Can someone help me bring in the groceries?" Mum and I get off the couch to go help, my thoughts still on James.

* * *

><p>Unsurprisingly, Claire has a unique room. It has a loft sort of feeing to it, as it is above her parent's restaurant, but it's very bright and open. The room is adorned in varying shades of purple and pink, something that would usually nauseate me except I am currently admiring it. I don't know how or why, but it's a very Claire sort of space. Claire and I are sitting on the floor of her room, decorating our nails with nail lacquer, talking about something that's—surprise!—not Conner.<p>

We were talking about Claire's family, and how her parents aren't sure they can maintain the upkeep of the restaurant, when Claire diverted the topic to my family. Since I'm secretly a witch, my sister hates me, Mum has cancer, and Dad is…Dad, I skirt around the topic, not in the mood for yet again bending the truth—also known as telling boldface lies.

"What's the deal with your sister then?" Claire asks.

"She's just not a big fan of me. You know, typical sibling dislike, stuff like that," I lie.

"Mmm. Was it always like that?"

I should say yes. Get the conversation over with. Yes, yes it was.

"No, it wasn't."

"What happened? What was it like before?"

"We just grew up and inevitably grew apart, I suppose. People change. Petunia's a raging clean freak with a need to give me a look to scare the Devil every time I open my mouth. I could try to change her,—and I've tried with every bit of strength in my body, believe me—but I've failed because that's just who she is," I joke.

Claire laughs.

"And before… We were best mates before," I say. "Did everything together. Hated to be separated. She was really protective, too. As loyal as the best Hufflepuff out there. And—"

"Sorry, did you say Hufflepuff?"

Oh, God. Oh, God. I didn't. I totally did. Stupid, stupid Lily!

"What?"

"Hufflepuff. You just said your sister was as loyal as the best Hufflepuff."

"Did I?"

"Yes, you did." Claire gives me a quizzical look.

"Odd."

Forget about it, Claire. Drop it. Shut up and drop the stupid word!

"So what does it mean?"

No one ever listens to me, do they?

"What does what mean?"

"Hufflepuff!"

"Oh, that. Well, it means…" I wildly look around the room for inspiration but I get nothing. Absolutely nothing. I see a picture of Claire and her family on Claire's dresser. It's a nice picture, but her brother stuck his tongue out and crossed his eyes, resulting in he being the only one not broadly smiling. "Brother!" I shout.

"Sorry?"

"Hufflepuff. It's a group of brothers at my school. Edward, Henry, and Charles Hufflepuff. They're all really, really loyal to each other. It's what they're known for. So known, in fact, that people at our school started describing anyone fiercely loyal as being 'Hufflepuff.' It's a school thing—sorry, I forgot you would have no idea what I'm talking about."

Look at that brilliant excuse. I'm so smart. How did I get so smart? I don't know, but coming up with something like that in a moment of pressure? Well done, Evans, well done. I mentally pat myself on the back.

"That's interesting. What'd you say their last name was?"

"Hufflepuff." I try to keep the grin off my face. It's such a brilliant cover-up she'd never—

"Weird, because James mentioned Hufflepuff to me once before as well, except he said it was some sort of elaborate pranking game that goes on at your school."

…Damn you, James Potter. Damn you for being just as big of a failure of a Muggle as I am!

But for God's sake, I'm _Muggle-born_! He's a pure-blood! I shouldn't be at the same failure level of a pure-blood! I've been doing this Muggle thing for seventeen years! James has been doing it for less than two months, and here I am making the same mistakes he is making. I fail. I hand over my Intelligence Badge, as well as my 'I'm-so-cool-for-passing-as-both-a-Muggle-and-witch' Badge.

"A pranking game? James told you that? Ha, who would've thought James would tell you about the Hufflepuff game…"

What the sodding hell is the Hufflepuff game?

"So which is it?" Claire asks, not accusingly, but as if she would really like to know since it probably doesn't make any sense to her. "A game or a set of brothers?"

Er… "Both!"

Claire's sculpted brown eyebrows meet in the middle of her forehead.

"Yes, both. See, they're three brothers who gave a new name to loyalty. And because of this loyalty, we made up a game. A pranking game. Because people try to pull practical jokes on each other, and you see who's loyal to you and who isn't, who you are loyal to and who you aren't. It's all about loyalty, but it's very complicated and takes _years_ to learn and perfect. It'd be too difficult to explain!"

Two perfect lies under pressure in a row? Just kidding, World. Hand that Intelligence Badge back over! This girl's brain is on fire!

Claire's mouth makes an 'O' and her eyes widen. "Really? That's so cool! But can you at least try to explain it? Who was loyal to you? Who were you loyal to? Who invented it? Did you prank James? Did he prank you? How did-?"

Too many questions, not enough brain power. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

"It's actually so much—Oops!" I watch as the open bottle of purple nail varnish slowly and gracefully falls towards the carpet. The liquid oozes out, soaking Claire's carpet.

"My rug!" Claire shrieks.

"I'm so sorry!" I am, but I needed a distraction. The last thing I need is to be caught in a web of lies, a web I won't be able to get out of. "Look, my mom has this amazing cleaning solution, it'll get anything out. I'll bring it over later, is that okay?"

"Yeah, yeah," Claire mutters distractedly as she futilely scrubs at her carpet. "Will it work?"

I think back to fifth year Charms class where we spent three weeks on cleaning charms. "Yeah, it's almost like magic."

* * *

><p>I'm in a peaceful land far, far away where there's no Voldemort, dead fathers, conflicting feelings, cancer, or angry sisters when I'm woken up by a loud screech.<p>

I try to ignore it, but I hear it two more times. I sleepily walk over to my owl in his cage.

"What, Clarence?" I hiss.

He simply looks at me. Just as I'm about to go back to bed, I hear _tap_, _tap_, _tap_. I look towards my balcony door and see James's owl, which I call Otis, but I don't actually know his name. I turn on a light and open up the door. Otis flies in, drops the letter he's holding, and then flies back out.

I pick up the piece of paper and read it. James's handwriting says, _Are you still up, Evans?_

I look at my clock. It's three-eleven in the morning. Why in Merlin's name would I still be up?

I search around for a piece of paper and a pen. James hasn't tried to talk to me once since his dad's funeral. He wouldn't be writing me a letter from across the street at three A.M. for just anything.

_Yeah, are you okay?_ I write.

I drag a sleepy Clarence out of his cage to deliver the letter. "To James Potter," I say, "across the street. I'll give you a treat when you come back."

Based on the look I get, I know that if Clarence had fingers to form a rude hand gesture, he would've made one.

I don't bother to lie down on my bed again, because the second I do I'll fall asleep. And then Clarence would peck me to death considering I woke him up to deliver a letter. Instead, I simply sit on my bed and stare at the wall.

When Clarence returns with a letter, I give him a treat and he gives me the letter.

_Can I Apparate to your house? _it says.

I notice that he didn't answer my question. He's starting to make me nervous. And while I know that my parents would kill me if they found out I had a boy in my room this late, I go ahead and write 'yes' to James's request. Besides, James hardly counts as any old boy. Mum and Dad understand the situation. They know what's going on between us. Sort of.

Only a minute later, there's a crack and James appears standing on my bed.

"Whoa—"

James tumbles to the floor with a crash.

"James!" I whisper.

"I—" he begins to loudly say. I rush over and put my hand over his mouth to stop him from talking. I listen very carefully, hardly breathing, while James stares at me with wide eyes. After a minute of silent staring and complete silence, I take my hand off James's mouth. I extend my hand to help him up off the floor, although he hardly needs it seeing as how tall and muscular he is and how short and…_not_ I am.

"Were you trying to land on my bed?" I ask him. He's been in my room before, so it's not like he was Apparating into the unknown. I wonder if he purposefully Apparated onto my bed. I wouldn't put it past him.

"No, I was trying to Apparate outside on your balcony, but it didn't work out too well." At my expression he says, "It's better than Apparating on the ledge, falling off and dying."

I shrug my shoulders. He's got a point, but still.

I'm suddenly aware of our situation.

"So, er, what's up?" I ask.

I look down at my nightclothes that consist of polka dot shorts and a tank top. James is wearing regular clothes. Did he just change into them or has he been wearing that all day?

"Uh"—James's hand automatically goes through his hair—"I just wanted to talk."

I glance around my room. There's a chair on one side and my bed on the other. I'd feel weird talking to James from across the room, and if I sat on my bed, I'd want to lay on my bed. And if I lay on my bed, James would lay down next to me. And I can't have a conversation with him with both of us lying on my bed. I just can't. So unless James wants to sit on the floor…

"Do you want to go outside?" I ask.

"Yeah."

James and I walk outside onto my balcony and he hops up on the ledge, his back towards the ocean. I try and sit down on my hammock, but it's too difficult, so I end up lying down. Would it really hurt if I closed my eyes for one minute…?

"Lily."

My eyes fly open. "Yeah?"

"You're not falling asleep are you?" He looks hurt.

"No," I protest, feeling guilty, "but if you're going to talk to me at three A.M. then I'm going to at least lie down to listen."

"Okay," James says.

I make sure to keep my eyes open as I wait for James to talk. I count the stars while waiting for him to say something, but by the time I reach one hundred and twenty-seven I realize that he's not going to speak first.

I turn my head to look at him. "How've you been?"

I cringe. How've you been? How've you been! God, could I be any stupider? His dad's just died and I'm asking how he's been!

James stares at me for a heartbeat before weakly chuckling. "I've been better, I'll tell you that."

I force a laugh. "Ha, yeah, sorry. Thinking isn't really my forte this early. Or would it be late? Anyway, what I meant was: How have you been holding up? I haven't seen you since… Well, it's been a while."

James nods. "Yeah. Sorry about that."

"Why are you apologizing? You didn't do anything!"

"I've been hiding out at my house and Sirius's this whole time. I just, like, disappeared."

"Yes, but that's not uncommon. I mean, if my dad…" I shake my head. "I don't know what I'd do. I'd probably stay in my room with boxes of Honeydukes' chocolate and cans of Coke and wouldn't emerge for days." James laughs quietly. As soon as I say it, I get nervous. "You haven't done that, have you?"

"No. I had Firewhiskey instead of Coke."

"James!"

"Kidding," he says, holding his hands up in the air.

I relax.

"Sort of."

I shoot him a reproachful look.

"It was only once. When I went to Sirius's with Remus and Pete. I got completely pissed on Firewhiskey and Blue Dragon snifter, but that was it. Swear."

"Did Sirius get smashed with you?"

"Not as bad," James says. "I was the worst because…I wanted to drink the most. I'd think 'This is going to give me one sodding bad headache,' and then I'd want to stop, but then I'd remember my dad and suddenly I'm downing another bottle."

I'm torn between the instinct to comfort and to criticize. "I know it's already happened, but getting drunk isn't going to make anything better," I ultimately say.

"I know," James says. He looks down at his hands. "So when I realized alcohol just made me feel more miserable, I decided to shut myself in my room until it was time to go to Hogwarts and then I wouldn't have to listen to my mum cry at night and I could mess around and screw up as Head Boy and have people hate me and snog random girls and pretend that I was over it."

He says it so desperately that I have no idea what to say in response. I immediately sit up, though. I slide over a bit so there's room for James to sit next to me. He sees and hops off the ledge to sit beside me. The hammock is tilted so it's supporting our backs. I slowly rock us back and forth on my heels.

I don't know what to comment on first: He won't be an awful Head Boy? Kissing willing girls won't help? People don't hate him? But before I decide, James starts talking again.

"Remember when I told you that my parents and I never talked about anything happening to my dad? My mum just told me that he had about six months, we were going to the beach, and that was it. Remember?"

"Yes," I say.

"I lied."

"What?"

James takes a deep breath. "There was this one time at the beginning of the summer when I came home pretty late. If it's that late when I come in, my parents are already asleep. But my dad was in the living room waiting for me. Just sitting there. I was a bit freaked out, so I asked him if he was okay. He told me to sit down and then he looked me straight in the eye and he said, 'Once I'm gone, you can't hole yourself up, James Potter. You've got to go out and live your life. Marry a nice girl, get a job, help the world. Make me proud.' And then he kept looking at me until I nodded my head. Then he left. He just bloody left! He went to bed! Who does that?"

People who don't want to cry in front of their son.

"James…" I start to say.

"And then about two hours ago," he continues, "I heard my mum going to bed and saying goodnight to Pinka, and I just realized it. Like, what the hell am I doing? Sitting in my room and drinking while my mum's all alone? If my dad was here he would tell me to get off my arse and stop being a prick."

"He would've understood, James," I say. "He would—I mean, he _knows_ you're upset. He's still proud of you, though. You shouldn't think he's not."

"Yeah, I know," James says. He runs his hands across his face. "It's just—Merlin—part of me just wants to sit and do nothing but throw Quaffles and drink and pretend nothing happened. But the other part of me can't stop thinking about how my dad said, 'Make me proud.' But I don't think I can, so why bother?"

I feel so sad.

"James…You have made your dad proud, so of course you can do it! You've just got to do what he said: Go be happy and do what you do. Go out with the guys, pull some pranks and make people laugh. Be an amazing Head Boy. Win us the Quidditch Cup this year. Get 'O's on all of your N.E.W.T.s. Defeat Voldemort!" I wildly lift my hands in the air. "Whatever you do, as long as you do your very best, your dad's going to be proud of you. He just wants you to go do something; he wouldn't want you to spend the rest of your youth being upset that he died. He wants you to—not move on, but keep living!"

James is intently looking at me the entire time. I look back at him and try to see what he's feeling, but so many emotions are on his face that I can't decipher one from the other.

"I know," James says. "I figured that out about an hour ago. I just…wanted someone else to tell me. Plus, I wanted to say sorry for… y'know."

I nod my head. We slowly move backward and forward on the hammock, no one saying a word. I rest my head on his shoulder for a minute, mostly because I don't feel like I can keep it up much longer. I feel James lay his head on mine for a moment. I then realize what he's just said. I lift my head to look at him.

"So does this mean you'll come out and do stuff again?"

"Uh, yeah?" James says. I can tell he's resisting the temptation to say duh.

I breathe a happy sigh of a relief. "Oh, good. I've been dying of boredom."

"Where's Claire been?"

"She, um, met a new guy," I cautiously say, even though James had broken up with her. "And trust me; he's not as much fun as you."

James pretends to wipe away a tear. "I'm touched, Evans."

I laugh. "Want to go to the fest tomorrow?"

"The fest?"

"Yes, and I'll take you on a rollercoaster!"

"Er…"

"Your mum can come with my parents, too, so we'll all get out of the house," I say.

James's face immediately relaxes. "Okay. What time?"

"It's always better at night, so we'll go at six. That way I can sleep in late. I have a feeling I'm not going to get much sleep tonight," I frankly tell him.

"You can go to bed if you want," James says. "I'll just head on home."

"No, no, it's all right. I don't mind staying up, honest." Lies. Complete and utter lies.

"I'll just go home, Lily, it's not a big deal."

"No, I want you to stay." Truth. Complete and total truth.

James barely raises his eyebrows. I flush, now feeling very flustered. Why would I say it like that?

"I mean, obviously you can't stay the whole night. Unless you want to! But you can't, like, sleep in my bed…with me." Shut up, Lily. Shut up, shut up, shut up. "You can stay if you want, all night even, but you would have to sleep on the floor. Unless I slept on the floor." And let James sleep in my bed? "No, just kidding, you would be sleeping on the floor, and I have pillows and blankets, but it's…the floor. You are welcome to stay as long as you want, though." God, Mouth, SHUT UP. "Just…on the floor. Or this hammock. Which isn't too uncomfortable," I lamely finish. James looks confused, yet very amused.

_What_ is wrong with me? Can I just go jump off my balcony now? Head first, preferably?

James chuckles, still looking puzzled. "No, that's all right, I should get back home."

Good idea. If I could, I would try to escape from myself, too.

"You sure?" I ask while scrutinizing his face. He doesn't seem too concerned for my mental health… Although it's probably best if he does leave. At this point, I don't know what I'll end up saying or doing around James.

He rolls his eyes. "Yes. I'm not going to go and do anything stupid."

Now it's my turn to give an incredulous look.

"Probably," James says.

I laugh, stand up, and walk into my room again. James follows, shutting the door behind him. I turn to face him. We're really close.

"Goodnight, James," I say, my voice suddenly barely above a whisper. I feel like my heart is now beating two times faster.

James takes a step closer to me. We're dangerously close now. Why is he so close? What's he going to do? What am I going to do? Do I step back? Do I step closer? Why do I want to take a step closer? Why is my mind screaming at me to take a step back? Why is a larger, more overpowering part screaming to take a step forward?

"Goodnight, Lily," James whispers.

Is he going to kiss me? Oh, God, he is. Or am I?

And just as I'm about to take a step closer, he leans forward and swiftly kisses me on the cheek before Disapparating, leaving me frozen on the spot.

* * *

><p><strong>I feel like such a tease. Sorry about that.<strong>

**This story is coming to a close. No, not the next chapter or the chapter after that, but it's been planned from the beginning that the end of this story will be the end of the summer. AKA when James and Lily finally get together. **

**Question to my British readers: Are there any British terms for like rollercoasters and ferris wheels, or is it just rollercoasters and ferris wheels? (I feel like a freak just for asking that..)**

**Anyway, update shouldn't take too long. See you soon,**

**MG**


	19. Fireworks and Butterflies

**Happy 2012 everybody! I hope everybody had a good New Years. I did. ;)**

**This story has gotten so many reviews. It makes me smile. Smiles are given to me by:**

**musiclover99 (you're friends are smart! James/Lily is the BEST. Thanks for the feedback, though, and for the whole skipping-rule-five. I didn't even notice, so thanks!), Claws254 (Happy new year's to you too! And thanks, and yes, I will, :), Skye531 (thanks for the suggestions! I have no intention of taking this story into their 7th year, but the last entry of this story is dated September 1st. :), I-Siriusly-Love-Black****, Marinewife08, Eleos, roflshvuakomail (that's the plan ;), The Slug Club (thank you!), yellow 14, lizthegingerone (teacups are an American thing too, although something I wholeheartedly avoid! Thanks for the tips!), Sarahrules336 (Thanks! Also, cooking is one of the BEST ways to spend your time.), Rani Jashalithie, worldnerd12 (A continuation of this story, no, but I may write a L/J story that actually happens at Hogwarts. Eventually.), AcrossTheWater (you're on Pottermore? So...jealous... Is it as amazing as everyone makes it out to be? Can't remember if I've asked this...), writergal24 (hahahaha. Stupid James. I hate it when he gets the eyes for anyone other than his true love Marlene.), xXjaziXx (A beleiber? I'm scandalized! Just kidding, I'm just not a fan. Slytherin's locket? Lucky gal. Do you have two different wands and a tie to go with it? I do. ;D), youawitchornot (uh-oh.), AjGirl15, LiveLaughLove53 (Christmas-Jesus is the reason for the season. ;D Happy [late] New Year to you too! And thanks!), TyemMarodyor (I know, I'm sorry! I just wanted to write '..AND THEY KISS. YAY!' but I couldn't. Not yet at least. ;), AriannaSaffyreMalfoy (no sequel was planned, but...I don't know. I'm thinking about it, but more than likely probably not. :/), Draconator, semperfortis (Wouldn't life just be amazing if summer was an entire year, period?), Jaisler (no followup story is planned, sorry! But I'm glad you're enjoying it. :), YoungAndLiving (I'm about to start fearing for my life.), Yumi Stern (Thank you so much! :D But no, this story is not continuing into their 7th year.), PoohBearGoesGangster (thanks, I can feel that I have the spark back, if that makes sense and doesn't sound totally arrogant. :3), softasthunder, urstory, Almost Genius (Fanfiction: the best way to procrastinate. Along with ), PenguinBoxers (Christmas break? Hmm..), BlindMindLover (My, whoever said that is so smart! ;D But yeah, agree, that part of the story was taken from personal experience. Sadly.), Stroke of Coffee, JackieMooneyLestrange (:D), TheStagAndDoeXx (Okay, thank you. Yeah, I'm working on those pesky American/British translations. Specific thanks for the dodgems translation. ;), team., Blue Wrackspurts (Sort of. I was watching AVPM and I was laughing as usual at that part, I thought to myself 'What the hell is a Hufflepuff anyway?' Thus, that scene!), Falling Head Over Heels (Yes, the stain came out. Lily made Claire get a paper towel and then used her magic to get rid of it, haha.), lilybethluna (No Sirius here, sorry! Although he will sort of make another appearance.), Hecate'sMushroomMinions (Haha, yeah, there's always going to be an American feel to my stories, unfortunate but inevitable. Thanks, I'm glad you're enjoying it!), L'amour est vie (Oh no! Haha, well, here's your update!), Thepinkhouseowner (thank you :D), jwtwifan (lollll), AshleyM15 (thanks!), alohamora080, Super Cara (No sequel planned, sorry. :/ It feels like it should be sixth year, shouldn't it? Have you read The Life and Times? It's 6th year then, but I just think it's odd that they would become animagi in the beginning of 5th year and then Sirius would risk it all before the end of 5th year, before he's even really had time to get used to it. Like it'd make more sense for him to reveal it after he's had a while to adjust to it and forget about how serious it is. That's just my opinion. *shrug*), Sammy-U, The Bitch Next Door (Not sure if I misread this, but you were right, I'm American!), Avada Kedavra Avada Off, Gray Fedora (Terrible, isn't it?), Er-my-nee Weasley, J-star Black, bubble drizzles (awww, thank you so, so much! I'm really glad you like my story, and a mucho gracias to Eleos for reccomending this fic! :), pud94 (thanks! haha, I know, I've been wanting summer all over again since I've been writing this. ;P), Random05 (No, I don't hate you. I honestly (and stupidly) didn't think about/know that owl were nocturnal, and constructive criticism is always welcome, so thank you.), and accio-food (Thanks! :D But no, no sequel, sorry. :/)**

**I've had this chapter planned for a while, so I'm pretty excited about it, especially the end. :)**

**Also, there is sort of a major A Tale of Two Cities spoiler at the end. If you really want to be surprised and have no idea what happens in the end of the story, well... You're screwed. Just kidding, but the spoilers are pretty important regarding what happens, and in actuality, Dickens has been foreshadowing the ending since like page 12. So you basically knew what was going to happen anyway. Either way, it isn't like a detailed spoiler that explains what happens to every character and how and why and...meh. Whatever. I'm making no sense. Prepare to be spoiled. **

**P.S. I've been getting LOTS of favorites and alerts, and I'm soo glad, but I'd LOVE to hear what you think about my writing, this story, etc. Feel free to please drop a review and express yourself. :)**

* * *

><p>"I want to thank you, Lily," Mrs. Potter quietly says to me.<p>

My parents, Mrs. Potter, and I are in the Potters' seashell-tastic living room waiting for James so we can leave for the fest. (Petunia's going to join us later. I think Mum forced her to agree to come.) It feels like we're always waiting for James. I had asked Mrs. Potter if she wanted me to go upstairs and get him, but she had said no, she wanted to talk to me for a moment. Mum and Dad are pretending to admire a painted portrait of—you guessed it—seashells.

I give Mrs. Potter a quizzical look. What have I done?

"For being there for James," the elderly woman explains. "We really only came back to the beach for you."

Um, what?

"Oh, I didn't—" Mrs. Potter shakes her head.

"James would've been all alone if we went back to our house, and I know that he's happier with you around. It's good for him to be around you, especially now."

I am so staggered; I openly stare at her.

"I'm so glad we ended up across the street from the Evans family this summer," she says with a light smile. Her eyes are a bit watery, as if she might start crying. She rests her hand on my shoulder. I'm saved from trying to find an appropriate response at the appearance of a tanned, messy haired boy.

"All right, sorry, I'm ready," James says. He looks at his mum and me, talking together as if we're discussing secret plans.

He gives me a questioning look, but I pretend not to see it. I'm too amazed at what Mrs. Potter said. Did they really come back to this house because of James and me? And why is it that everyone's thinking I'm all so great at helping James? In all honesty, all I've done is hold his hand and tell him he needs to live his life. I doubt that makes me a saint. James is happier with me around? That's nothing special. I'm happy when I'm with him, too. That's the way it is with friends. You aren't friends with someone who makes you miserable!

"Great," Mum says, "let's go!" The three parents walk out together, my mother leading. James and I follow behind them.

"What was that about?" James whispers to me.

One guess as to what he's talking about.

"Oh, you know, girl stuff," I vaguely say. I don't think James believes me, but I have no desire to discuss what his mother had said about him. Correction: about him and me.

I search around for a topic change as we walk.

Nothing. We walk on in silence. Not uncomfortable silence, just silence. All right, I'm uncomfortable, but that's because James's mum's words keep ringing in my ears. I doubt James is uncomfrotable.

I watch my parents and Mrs. Potter stroll along talking. None of them had mentioned how when James and I went to bed last night, we hadn't talked to each other in days and had no plans for the next day, but when we woke up this morning, we had plans. I don't know whether that means my parents and Mrs. Potter are oblivious, trusting, or approving.

They would be oblivious if they didn't think anything of it and would be absolutely flabbergasted if Lily Evans had James Potter in her bedroom at three in the morning. Or they would be oblivious if they think we had made the plans through polite letters or something as equally innocent, making sure not to break the rules they had given us. Because we would never do something as disobedient as sneaking out late at night. Definitely not!

They would be trusting if they knew that we had probably seen each other the night before (either outside or inside someone's house), but know that nothing would have happened since we're just friends and were together, after all.

They would be approving if they thought that we had seen each other the night before and since we are two teenagers of the opposite sex, something had happened, but they don't mind because they want us to be together, screw the rules.

I highly doubt Mum, Dad, and Mrs. Potter are the oblivious kind. Which leaves us with trusting or approving.

I'd like to bet a kidney that my parents are trusting, but I think approving is a close runner-up. Mum keeps giving me these looks whenever I mention James or when he comes over. And however much she wants to deny it, I know she and Mrs. Potter sit around and talk about the two of us. They probably think James and I got together last night and we're just dying to run away and frolic in our newfound love for each other. As if!

If they knew that we just sat on my hammock and talked about how James gets drunk, they'd be floored. I mean, one would think that with a regular pair of hormonal, perverted teenagers-a boy and a girl-in the girl's room at three in the morning something would have happened, but—

Okay, so something did happen. Kind of. When James kissed me on the cheek, was that a something-something or a nothing-nothing? It sounds like a nothing-nothing, right? But then why did I stand like a statue for almost a minute after James had Disapparated?

Out of the corners of my eyes I peek over at James. His face is blank, but he looks content. He doesn't look too tired either. Not like he lost sleep over the fact that a certain redhead wanted to very much take a step closer to a certain bespectacled seventeen year old boy. Because losing sleep over something like that would be ridiculous. Ridiculous, indeed.

When we arrive at the entrance to the park, Mrs. Potter makes a big commotion of going through the Muggle money and trying to figure out how much to pay for tickets for James.

"My treat, Ella," my dad says with a smile. He hands a bill to the exhausted looking woman behind the glass window. In exchange, she hands him a bundle of tickets. Dad takes about twenty tickets for himself, my mum, and Mrs. Potter. "For the Ferris wheel," my dad says with a wink towards me. He hands the rest of the tickets to me and James.

"Don't go too crazy," he advises over the music ringing about the air from a local band. "And remember: Wands on you and you can stay out until twelve if you stay together the entire time."

I nod. James looks hesitant to leave his mum, but Mrs. Potter says, "Stop being a baby, James. Go have fun. I'll be fine." She gives him a stern smile; something I didn't think was possible with her.

We say our good-byes, agreeing to meet up there at around eight to grab something to eat. James and I start weaving our way through the crowd. He's looking at everything with a bit of wonder in his eyes.

Slightly ahead I see a long, winding line at my favorite ride. I grin and turn to James. "So just how much of a Gryffindor are you really, James?"

James looks at me like that's the most ludicrous question in the world. "Please. I'm the definition of Gryffindor, Lily."

"We'll see about that…"

* * *

><p>James and I are in line for his very first rollercoaster. He's currently hyperventilating.<p>

"Calm down, James, or you're going to pass out!" I tell him. He ignores me.

"I don't want to do this," he says for the third time in the past five minutes. "Isn't there a smaller one?"

"This?" I say. "You can't do _this_?" I gesture towards the pink railing in front of us. Seriously, this ride was designed for six year olds, its pride and glory being a twenty foot drop. "James, this is the smallest ride here!"

"It could break, Lily. You're basically falling to your death. What if something happened? I wouldn't have time to get my wand to save you, and—"

"Save me?" I laugh. "James, I won't need saving! I've been on worse than this. Trust me, it'll be fun."

"Then why is everyone screaming when they fall?" He nervously looks at the carts of people falling to the ground. Each one is screaming; a lot are putting their hands up in the air. He's been looking at the main drop so often, he looks like he's got a twitch in his neck. He was brave when I first told him about going on a rollercoaster, but when he saw The Hurricane—a ride that goes down the first hill at an incredibly fast speed and then takes you upside down and twists and turns more times than you can count—he suggested we start smaller. We ended up at Flight of the Flamingo. He was totally fine with going on this one, but with each passing second, he gets more and more nervous.

"They scream because it's scary."

"Then why are we going on it!"

"Because it's fun. It's like…" I try and think of a way to explain it. "Like when you're flying really high on your broom and then dive down, but pull up right before you hit the ground. You like to do that, right? For all your adoring fans?" I know he does. He can't deny it. He shows off doing stuff like that all the time.

"But I'm controlling it," James counters. "That prat"—he points to the smiley and friendly elderly man that operates the ride—"is in charge of my life."

"Don't call old people prats," I admonish. "Look, we're up next." And we are. The bright pink carts are now in front of us. I push open the gates and climb into the cart. James doesn't follow me.

"Godric Gryffindor is rolling over in his grave in embarrassment of you," I tell James. I don't worry about anyone hearing me say Gryffindor. It's mostly little kids, and they'll think he's a T.V. character or someone made-up.

That seems to do the trick. James gets into the cart next to me, and once he's seated I pull the bar down over our laps. James's knuckles turn white as he clenches the bar. I sigh and glance over my shoulder. I smile. I turn around as much as I can, ignoring my legs pressing against James's, and grin at two little girls in the cart behind us, both around the age of five. One has black hair in neat braids, and the other has brown hair that's so tangled I think a bird tried to nest there. Ice cream stains are on their shirts.

"Hi," I say, trying to be friendly. "My name's Lily. What are your names?"

The girl with the black hair looks really nervous all of a sudden, but not the brunette. She pushes some hair out of her face and says, "I'm Stacy. This is Nicole, she's my bestest friend."

"Hi, Stacy, Nicole. This is James"—I put my hand on his shoulder and he turns around, a queasy look on his face—"and he's my friend. But he's scared." I make a sad face. "Have you guys been on this ride before?"

Stacy beams up at me. "Yes! This is our most favorite ride ever! We've been on… How many times, Nicole?" She turns to look at her friend.

"Five trillion, I think," she says, no longer looking shy.

"Five trillion times!" Stacy declares to me.

I can't help but giggle. Stacy and Nicole giggle with me, but I doubt they know what at. James is looking at me now.

"And is it scary?" I ask the girls. The carts lurch forward a bit and begin to move up the ramp.

Nicole violently shakes her head. "No, no, no. It's really, really, really fun!"

"Can you tell my friend James that?"

"Don't worry, James," Stacy yells. "You're going to have lots and lots of fun!"

James just says, "Sure," before turning forward. I smile at the girls and say thanks. I face forward as well.

"Thanks a lot, Lily," James says.

"Whatever for, James?" I innocently ask, but he doesn't answer. He's just noticed that we're "high" up, almost to the top, and the carts in front of us have dropped already. A second before we fall, James grabs my hand and tightly holds on. I feel the familiar lurch in my stomach from going down a rollercoaster hill, but there's also a different butterfly feeling.

I try and get James to lift up his hands on the ride, but he absolutely refuses. He doesn't let go of my hand the entire time.

When we get off (forty-seven seconds later), my hand is numb from James's tight squeezing. He sees me trying to flex it. "Sorry," he says.

I wave my hand in the air to let him know it's no big deal. Just before James and I walk out of the exit, I hear someone say, "Bye, Lily! Bye, James!" I turn to see Stacy and Nicole standing with two women, noticeably pregnant and tired, waving at James and me before walking off with their mothers.

I wave back, but it's too late.

James and I move to stand near a food cart.

"So what did you think?" I ask him.

He appears to be in deep thought. "Well… I suppose it wasn't too bad… I wouldn't mind going on another one with you… Maybe The Hurricane…"

"Good! Now let's go!" I lead James through the area while pointing out all the rides we'll soon be visiting. "Water rides, dodgems, Ferris wheels, we're going on them all!"

And he actually looks excited.

* * *

><p>It ends up being a very successful day. James and I use every one of our tickets on the many rides. I even get him to go on The Hurricane. He doesn't hold my hand, but he does keep up an eloquent round of "Shite! Shite! Shite!" the entire ride. We see a mother reporting James to one of the workers. We quickly run away.<p>

Sometimes when James is laughing, though, I notice he instantly stops and his body goes rigid. I think he feels guilty about laughing with his dad dead, but after the third time I assure him that his dad's happy James is having fun, he loosens up a bit more.

We run into Claire and Conner, as well. It's awkward at first, because I didn't know Claire was coming today with Conner, and Claire didn't know I was going with James, but we talk for a couple minutes before going our separate ways. As James and I are walking away, though, Claire shouts out, "Lily!"

I turn back around and see her walking towards me alone, Conner patiently waiting behind her. "One second," I say to James before meeting Claire halfway. "Yeah?"

Claire looks at me very thoughtfully. "I just want to let you know that I'm okay with you dating James. You two are good together."

"Oh, we're not—"

"But you will be. I can tell." She gives me a quick wink and a smile before hurrying off to Conner. I slowly walk back to James.

"What'd she say?"

"Just…stuff. Girl stuff." It's at moments like these where my own stupidity shocks me. How can I so easily come up with an excuse one day, and then another I'm saying 'girl stuff' _twice_?

James nods and shoves his hands into his pockets.

It's also at moments like these where James completely shocks me. Why wouldn't he disregard my right to privacy and ask me what really happened with Claire and Mrs. Potter?

As I ponder James Potter and why he does the things he does—one of the most complex questions in existence to me-,I find myself not watching where I'm going, resulting in me running into someone. Some of the person's drink splashes onto the ground, narrowly missing my feet.

"I'm so sorry, sir! I didn't mean—"

"Lily Lu! I've missed you this summer!"

Oh, God. Not again.

I look up into the man's face and see a familiar ruddy face and pseudo beard. Yup, it's him. "Hey...Tony. Yeah, it's been a while since I've seen you around."

"You've missed out on a lot of parties! All the blokes in this town sure do miss you." While I know Tony didn't mean it in the way it sounded, what he said still somehow bothers me.

"You remember James, right?"

"Oh, yeah, 'course. James, buddy." James and Tony shake hands.

"Do you remember how we met here all those summers ago? Let's ride another rollercoaster together, Lily Lu, for old times' sake. You don't mind, right, James?" Tony asks.

I look at James with wide eyes, praying he'll come to my rescue yet again.

James puts his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. My skin feels prickly. "Sorry, Tony, but I do. I promised Lily I'd take her to go get something to eat."

"Oh. Next time, Lily?" Tony says to me with a grin.

"Yeah, absolutely. Bye, Tony."

"See you, Lily Lu, James."

We part ways and all I can think about is the night James first met Tony at that beach party and the conversation that happened then. Oh, Irony, how you make me laugh.

"What's so funny?" James asks, tightening his grip around my waist, which I just realize is still there. The smile wipes off my face, but then it's replaced but a newer, smaller one.

"Nothing. This is the second time you've saved me, though. I'm not quite sure how I'll find a way to pay you back."

James's arm has left my waist, but he turns to wickedly grin at me as we walk. "I'm sure you'll find a way," he says, a suggestive tone almost entirely concealed in his voice. Almost.

I shove his shoulder. "Wanker. Come on; let's go find my parents and your mum."

We meet them at the front of the park at eight as we had agreed. Petunia is with them when we arrive. Her face is guarded, but I know she's having a good time. She's just still being too Petunia to fully enjoy herself since a witch is there with her. All six of us go get something to eat at a little joint that has the best fish and chips. Ever.

Afterwards, my parents and Petunia go off to do their own thing, and I take Mrs. Potter and James on the Ferris wheel. Mrs. Potter had already gone with my parents, so she's fine the entire time. For the first half of the ride, James snaps at anyone for rocking the cart, but then he calms down and enjoys himself. Mrs. Potter, Petunia, and my mum and dad eventually head on home, but I take James to the pier so we can watch the fireworks display.

Every night the fest is here there's a fireworks show, so James might've already seen the fireworks from our street, but I like standing out on the pier and watching them. It's not the greatest spot for watching the fireworks, but I like the pier and you can see them well enough. James doesn't object, at least.

A green firework explodes in the sky. I can see the reflection in the water underneath James and me.

"That one's the color of your eyes," James says.

I wrinkle my nose. "I never really liked the green ones."

"Which ones do you like then?"

"The gold ones. The ones that shimmer in the sky," I dreamily say.

A few more purple and red ones flare up before my favorite gold ones do. When the gold ones are sparkling in the air, James says, "You're right. Those are the best. They remind me of Snitches darting across the sky."

I roll my eyes. Of course he'd pick his favorite firework based on Quidditch. James sees me roll my eyes and chuckles. More fireworks burst in the air, lighting up the sky and the water, along with James's face.

I feel so blissful right now, naturally, something has to come along and ruin it. I can't help but think that I might not get another peaceful moment like this for a while. School starts in less than two weeks. Sure, there's always a lazy Saturday where I lay out on the grounds around the lake or I curl up in front of the Gryffindor fireplace with a book, but it's not going to be the same.

During the summer I feel like I can escape it all and be a regular kid. And since the Potters came here this summer, I wasn't entirely able to flee from it all, but it was almost like a regular summer, minus the Death Eaters; I basically just made a new friend that understands me more. But back at school, there's always going to be a coming test, Head Girl duties, typical Hogwarts drama, and Voldemort and cancer looming in the shadows together.

Here, lying on the beach, standing on the pier, sitting in my wicker armchair, walking through Shrivers, the days drift away and I don't think as much. I worried and thought more this summer than any other summer, but I know it was less than if I had been getting the letters and _Daily Prophet_s at home or at Hogwarts. But now that I'm going back into the real world…

"Do you ever worry about the future?" I ask James.

"Nope. Worrying is for pricks," he simply says.

I hit him. "Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot that I can't have a single serious conversation with you, Potter."

A mixture of purple and gold fireworks burst into the air like the liquid center from a candy.

"All the fucking time," James seriously says.

"What?"

"All the fucking time. That's when I worry."

My brows meet in the middle. "Oh." I hadn't expected that answer. Not at all.

There's a pause.

"Do you ever worry about the future?" James asks me now.

"All the fucking time," I say.

James laughs for a moment, and I join him. When we stop, he turns to look at me.

"What do you worry about?" he asks.

Three months ago I would have knocked you upside the head if you suggested I spill my worries to James Potter. Five weeks ago I would've told him just to get it off my chest, and then immediately regretted it. Now I tell him because I want to confide in him, and I know that he will understand. "My mum. School. Failing as Head Girl. N.E.W.T.s. My sister. My mum. My dad. Voldemort. And… Never mind." I thought I could, but I don't have the guts to tell him the last thing. I try not to think like that, but it's essentially behind everything.

"What?"

"Forget it, James."

"Come on, tell me," he pleads.

I angrily sigh. "You're a prat, you know that, right?"

He grins. "I've been told so, many times actually."

I make a face at him before pulling my hair into a ponytail and then letting it fall back down. "I was just going to say…I'm afraid…of being a Muggle-born. It's not like I think those people are right, but I'm scared of what can happen, all because of who my parents are and who I am. I'm scared something will happen to my mum, dad, and sister because they're my family. I'm scared of doing Head Girl patrols by myself at night. I'm scared that I won't have any money or be able to get a house or a job because of my birth. I'm scared of doing something and fighting after school, because the torturing and killing of Muggle-borns is becoming a sport…" I take a deep breath. "But I guess that's what makes it all worth it, doesn't it?" I say, my voice embarassingly shaking slightly. "The fact that I'm scared to be in a position of power. Being too frightened to tell my family what's going on is the reason to fight. So that I don't have to be scared."

James doesn't say anything for a while. "You won't have to do patrols on your own. I'll do them with you. Even if I have to double up to do my own and yours, you won't do them by yourself. And if you ever run out of money and need a place to stay, you can always come stay with me or Sirius," he says while looking at me. He says it half-jokingly, half-seriously. "But you're right. That's the reason to fight. A witch as amazing as you fearing for her life is exactly the reason to fight."

My eyes roam across James's face for what feels like forever. Only when I feel tears pricking my eyes do I look down at the ocean beneath my feet. Why the heck am I crying? Is it because of what he said or how he said it? Both? Something else entirely?

Happy thoughts. Random thoughts. Any other thoughts, really.

"What do you worry about?" I ask James.

"My mum being alone. Not living up to my dad's expectations. N.E.W.T.s. Quidditch. My mum. Remus. Sirius. Peter. Voldemort. You. Screwing up as Head Boy. Being alone in the world."

James added me onto the list? I'm surprised. Very surprised. Even though he was on my list; I just didn't say it. I don't think we're on each other's lists for the same reason, though…

"You're worried about being a Head, too?" I ask. It's the best I can come up with. I'm pathetic.

James nods.

"Dang. I guess that means we're both destined to fail at this job!"

James laughs, but I can hardly hear it because of the sudden increase in noise level.

With echoing booms and bangs, the grand finale of the fireworks display finishes. I feel like I missed the whole thing. But they had a lot of the gold ones in the end, so I'm not too disappointed.

"The fireworks are over," James says.

"Duh," I say to lighten the mood. I grin at him.

Just before James makes a snarky remark, I start walking off the pier. I hear his footsteps behind me that indicate he's following me.

We start walking past the shops and restaurants towards our houses in diplomatic silence.

I put my arm around James. "And don't worry about being alone," I say. "Disappointing Head Boys and Head Girls stick together."

* * *

><p>It's late morning and I'm sitting on the beach crying. I swear, I've never been this emotional before. I'm crying all the bloody time lately. I cry talking to James, I cry reading a book. A book! A book that I've read before, no less! I already knew how it was going to end, but I cry anyway.<p>

I glance down and reread the last paragraph of _A Tale of Two Cities_.

"_I see that child who lay upon her bosom and who bore my name, a man winning his way up that path of life which was once mine. I see him winning it so well, that my name is made illustrious there by the light of his. I see the blots I threw upon it, faded away. I see him, fore-most of judges and honoured men, bringing a boy of my name, with a forehead that I know and golden hair, to this place—then fair to look upon, with not a trace of this day's disfigurement—and I hear him tell the child my story, with a tender and faltering voice._

"_It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known."_

I try and comprehend it, try and grasp the idea, but I can't seem to. Loving someone so much that you'd be willing to walk to your death, just to protect them and keep them safe and happy and alive… It seems like that would take a great deal of bravery.

I try and think how Sydney Carton must have been feeling when I hear someone plop their body down next to me.

"Hey," James says. "I went to your house, but your mum said you were out here. Do you—are you crying?"

I quickly wipe my eyes and curse myself for thinking too much. It's just a book. It's fiction; it's not real.

"No," I immediately say. I realize he'll just call out my lie so I say, "Yes, all right. I was."

"Why?" James worriedly asks.

"Because this book is sad."

"The…book? You're crying over a book?" He probably thinks I'm stupid now. Stupid, crazy, pathetic worrier. What a keeper.

"It's _sad,_ James. He dies for her," I tell him.

"Who?"

"Sydney Carton. He dies for the girl he loves." And because I know he'll never read it, I summarize how Sydney died for the woman he loved, a woman who didn't love him back. Not like that, at least. Then I tell James how Sydney died for Lucie, the woman, just so she could be happy and live with the man she did love, her husband.

"So really," I tell James, "he didn't have to die. But he did."

"Well it's not really like he had a choice," James states as if it's obvious.

"Uh, yeah, he did. He didn't have to do anything. He chose to do it all because he loved her!" He's clearing missing the point.

"I know," James says. "But it's like…if she was the love of his life, there really was no choice. He had the option to do something else, but if you really love someone, there isn't ever a choice between your life and what will make her have a good life. Because it's never going to be you. It's always going to be her. Her life, her happiness."

I stare at James. And stare. And stare.

I don't know why I do it. Tomorrow morning or five years from now I probably still won't be able to tell you why I do it.

All I know is that I then lean over, press my lips against James's lips, and kiss him.

* * *

><p><strong>Now THAT was horrible of me.<strong>

**Everyone has Lily read Pride and Prejudice and relate it to James and Lily, but I decided to have her read A Tale of Two Cities and relate it to Lily and Harry and the whole bravery/sacrifice thing. And that's what I would spend my English classes thinking about instead of actually focusing on the real ATTC story. :P**

**Update should be sooooooon,**

**MG**

**:)**


	20. Confessions

**Ugh, ugh, ugh. Sorry this took so long. I honestly had no inention of it taking this long, but with school starting and training for track... I just found myself way busier. Sorry again!**

**As always, thank youuuu:**

**adriana-xx (Ahh, I'm sorry! :(), Just so you know (Ahh, I'm sorry to you too! It's only a day late, that's not too bad, right?), Kay McNell (oooh, good guesses. ;), Mary (Thank you so much!), Dewfrost314 (thanks!), TheBakedPotato, FlowerProngs, Arnie-rocks (Thank you! :)) And yeah, it's going to end on September 1st, exactly.), PhoenixOfIce, Heart of the Phoenix, Claws254, yellow 14 (thank you :), SiriuslySiera (I've never thought of writing my own characters entirely, but I'll think about it. Thanks!), Lais (good, I'm glad. :), marinewife08, anavihs (thanks!), chrissy (Sirius and Marlene tried to get together but it didn't work!), storycat12 (:D), .. (you're quite smart. ;), softasthunder (BECAUSE I'M A TERRIBLE PERSON.), YourAngelicVampyre, Swallow in the Cloud (Thanks!), Frostyfriend96, 22potterfan, YoungAndLiving (I know, I am. :(), Falling Head Over Heels, Karen (thank you!), LiveLaughLove53 (A Tale of Two Cities=long, hard to understand, but the best book I've had to read for school. Oh, and no, no more Death Eater action. :/), team., semperfortis, Blackheart09, AriannaSaffyreMalfoy, 3l1n0r (anywhere between 2-4 chapters. I know, I know.), urstory, SeriouslySiriusBlack (No! :), A Lily In Highgarden (Thank you so much! And yes, I like it better when at least one of the parents are dead. Four people dying in four years is not as realistic as someone already dying. But yeah, Sydney was also like James, and I related it in the sense that JK Rowling said that James in a way didn't have a choice because he was going to die either way since V wouldn't spare him, so I like the idea of James believing if it came to love of his life [Lily] he'd willingly die for her.), Haven'tgotanaccountyet, bubble drizzles, mee, aprilx14, CinzieTwut, Redvines98 (There is a possibility I may write a J/L fic at Hogwarts, but it would be unrelated to this story.), J-star Black, Tyem Marodyor (Note: If you read ATTC [which is actually very good] you will need Sparknotes or something [unless you're a genius, which is a possibility] because it's crazy hard to understand some of the stuff!), bakemeapie (Have you read ATTC? I'm assuming yes, but Sydney's also like Snape. Not very good, talented but not using it well, and ends up sacrificing everything for the girl he loves who has better. In all honesty, I didn't think of it like that, so you're very smart for pointing that out. Thanks!), Hobokin, alohamora080 (Agh, I know, this story has so many reviews it's crazy! Thanks!), percabethshamus (:D), Mjkenn01 (Wow, thank you!), accio-food (aw, thanks!), xXjaziXx (hahahaha, not your cat! I'm sorry!), Super Cara, PenguinBoxers (Sadly, it is.), youawitchornot, The Bitch Next Door, Er-my-nee Weasley (P&P does relate to J/L, but I feel as if it has been a tad overused.), Moonlight Grove, Book-Mania-Girl520, musiclover99 (Sorry my grammar wasn't perfect in my A/N.), AjGirl15, roflshvuakomail, AcrossTheWater (Still, it's pretty cool. I would have rather had an encyclopedia though. :/), KellyNicoleSum, Sarahrules336 (Aww, I want snow again!), jwtwifan (HAHAHAHA!), ToothpasteDrool (Yeah, I think by the time they realized how serious it actually was, since they were kind sheltered during school, they might call him by his nicknames, but they'd be with the Order and Dumbles wouldn't like that so they'd just go back to calling him Voldemort. Plus, Sirius and Remus called him by his name, and that was AFTER he killed their best friends! No, I'm not on Fictionpress. Not entirely creative enough for that stuff. Thanks for the compliments. :), Jaisler, writergal24 (I'd love to write the Animagi thing, but I don't think there would be a place for me to fit it in and I still think James would really keep this a secret, Lily or not.), Rani Jashalithie, Eleos (Hahaha, thank you, I love the meddling parents too. ;D), [blank], books4evah, Sammy-U, Ojjy (Cliff hangers make you wanna come back for more!), Avada Kedavra Avada Off (no sequel), teddyandlilyforever, Almost Genius (A little too late for more jealousy), Blue Wrackspurts, worldnerd12, lilybethluna, BlindMindLover, , wingswordsandmetaphors (thank you :), LovelyGirthls, TheStagAndDoeXx (haha, don't fret. You aren't the only one! I spend PLENTY of school time thinking about HP-related things.), and sephiesort (:D).**

**, FF is erasing you're name for some reason. I regret to report that it hates you. But I don't so a special thanks to you. :) Sorry if anyone else actually searched for their name through that mess and couldn't find it because FF deleted it!**

**GAH. I hate writing those things, but because I am so eternally grateful to everyone getting this story to where it is, I will continue these atrociously long A/Ns. Unless everyone hates them and wants me to stop...**

**OH! OH! For the notes: **

**James is **_italics_**.**

**Sirius is **_italics underlined_**.**

**Remus is bold italics.**

**Peter is bold underlined. **

* * *

><p>Surprisingly enough, I have thought about kissing James before. Not recently (unless you count wanting to step closer), but in the past two years the thought has crossed my mind.<p>

The first time was when I was fifteen and some of the other Gryffindor Muggleborns had called for a game of Truth or Dare at our first post-Quidditch victory party. I played. At one point Sirius had turned to me with an evil grin on his face and said, "Evans, truth or dare?" Knowing Sirius, the questions would be awfully embarrassing and personal. When I played with Muggles, I would always pick truth, because you could lie if you absolutely needed to. But not here.

Two prats by the names of James and Sirius had found some sort of truth charm. It didn't operate like Veritaserum in the sense that it forced you to tell the truth; instead, once the charm was cast, a blue cloud appeared over the person's head. It stayed blue if the person told the truth, but the second the victim told a lie, the cloud turned fire red. In this particularly awful game of Truth or Dare, everyone agreed that the charm would be cast on whoever picked Truth and then the counter-curse would be said when he had answered. So there was no lying in this game; you told the truth. Or else.

So I had picked dare. And it was a mistake. Sirius had a mischievous glint in his eyes and said, "Snog James for two minutes."

James's face lit up as if Sirius had just announced that the Ministry declared Christmas was going to be every month from then on.

Everyone said "Oooh!" and watched me in anticipation. That was the year James had decided he wanted to date me/snog me/catch me/fancy me/whatever he decided. Everyone had known James had asked me out multiple times. Everyone had known that I had turned James down every time. Everyone had known that James had asked for a kiss before. Everyone had known that I had never given nor was I planning to ever give him one. But no one had known that I was going to look Sirius in the eye, smoothly say, "Fine," and walk over and plant myself in front of James.

James looked… There are no words for it. It was as if after Sirius declared that Christmas was going to come every month, I said that Dumbledore just told me James's birthday was also going to be celebrated monthly and exams were to be canceled. I knew he was just excited because he was finally going to get me, and then he could move on.

I had slowly moved toward James, my hands on the ground, one on each side of James. My wand was loosely in my right hand. I was a centimeter from James's lips, and for one moment, I had thought about what it would be like to kiss James. I knew that he would know what he was doing. It would probably even be a very nice snog if I could forget that it was Potter I was kissing. He'd probably be really into it, excited and proud at finally being able to kiss me. I had thought about kissing the black-haired boy in front of me for one second. And then I set an armchair across the room on fire.

No one had known it was me. I barely moved my wand, and I said the incantation so softly; I might as well have thought it. Moreover, everyone was too busy watching my lips and James's lips to focus on my hands. To this day, I'm positive only Marlene knows about my brilliant plan, since I had told her afterwards. And it was brilliant if I do say so myself. All the students had jumped up in a panic, trying to figure out what to do and what had happened. McGonagall had arrived, demanded we all head to bed at once, and everyone forgot about my dare.

The next time I had thought about actually kissing James was about a week before The Incident. He and Severus had been dueling, and I had intervened. James said he would stop if I kissed him. I had hesitated for a moment, thought about what it would be like to kiss James. The same thoughts came to my mind as the night we played Truth or Dare: It would probably be a good snog, but it would be with Potter, and that would mean he had won. Won me. I had cast the Bat-Bogey hex in response.

When Jessica had pranced around talking about how James could "do amazing things with his lips and tongue," I again wondered what it'd be like to kiss James, only because he had asked me to do it so many times. That time I had thought about it for about twenty seconds max.

I hadn't really given kissing James much thought, but I thought I had known at least one thing: James wouldn't sit there like an idiot.

I guess I was wrong.

I had leant to the side and placed my hand on the side of James's face, bringing him closer to me. James didn't even have time to say "What?" before my lips were on his.

His lips are warm and they make mine feel tingly, but they don't move. At all. He doesn't even move his hands or his head. Pushing me away would have at least been doing something! Instead, he just freezes up. My lips practically lie on his lips for three heartbeats before I pull away.

I begin to panic.

What did I just do? I ruined everything. I kissed him. I kissed James. I kissed James Potter. And he didn't kiss me back. Why did I do that? Why didn't he kiss me back? Does he hate me? Did I just ruin our entire relationship? Is he that much in love with Jessica? I just made a complete and utter fool of myself, didn't I?

Yes. I did.

I slowly open my eyes as the horror of what I've done washes over me. I see James staring at me.

"Lily—"

I want to cry. I quickly stand up. "I'm sorry, that was a mistake, and I shouldn't have done it. I have to go."

And then I stand up and sprint towards my house, leaving my book and James in the sand behind me.

* * *

><p>I run all the way up to my room and lock my door, my heart rapidly pounding in my chest. I sink to the floor with my back against my door. James had called my name and I think he tried to run after me, but I ignored his calls and ran faster.<p>

I kissed James. I. Kissed. James.

Why the _hell_ did I kiss him?

It was only because I was feeling sentimental, I tell myself. I would have kissed anyone at that moment. It's because of what he said. And that I was crying. It means nothing.

Then why can't I stop thinking about how he didn't kiss me back?

Why didn't he kiss me back! He's always wanted to kiss me! Did he see how awful of a person I am this summer and decide he doesn't fancy me anymore? Did he ever fancy me? Was this his ploy all along? What if he had just wanted me to think he liked me, and then when I gave in and kissed him, he wouldn't kiss me back and he'd just laugh in my face?

That git. But…then where was the laugh? Why did he look…the way he looked when I opened my eyes? If it had all been a trick, wouldn't he be smirking and ruffling his hair?

I pull my knees up to my chest and let my head fall back. It bangs on the door.

"Shite," I curse.

I realize I have tears on my cheeks. And as much as I want to blame it on hitting my head, I know that's not the reason why.

I've never felt so humiliated in my life. And…almost heartbroken.

Someone knocks on my door. "Lily? James is here. He wants to see you," my mum chirpily says. My poor mother. She doesn't know that James is waiting downstairs to tell her daughter that he doesn't like her like that because he's in love with a bitch named Jessica. He'll probably add that she is a terrible kisser, and he's writing to Dumbledore to request a new Head Girl because the current one is too stupid.

"I can't see him," I tell Mum through the door. "Tell him I'm in the shower."

"Are you all right, Lily? Did something happen?"

"Just…tell him, Mum. Please."

"Okay." I push my ear against the door and hear her footsteps head down the stairs.

"Sorry, James," I can barely hear my mum say. "Lily's in the shower. I'll tell her you stopped by, though."

I can't hear James's response.

"Sure," Mum says, "I'll tell her."

I hear the front door shut, indicating that James has left. I crawl into my bed and close my curtains with a flick of my wand. I close my eyes and try to sleep. Try not to think.

Would it really be so bad if I never came out of my room again?

* * *

><p>James stops by again today. Twice. I have my mum tell him I'm out doing errands the first time, and then that I'm at Claire's the second time. I know James knows my mum's lying for me. I wonder why he hasn't Apparated into my room already or something, but then I realize he's probably glad he doesn't have to see me. I bury my head in my pillows more.<p>

Mum told me that James asked her to tell me that he really, really wanted to speak with me, and then she had asked me what happened. I told her I can't talk about it right now, but that I'll tell her later.

I don't think I'll keep that promise. But she doesn't need to know that.

Is there a possibility I can Obliviate James and make him forget the whole thing? Then can someone perform the charm on me?

* * *

><p>I've got it! I'll just write to Marlene, ask her to sneak into the Department of Mysteries, break about a hundred wizard laws, and steal me a Time-Turner! It's brilliant! I mean, yeah, I would have to turn back time and tackle my second self into the sand, which could be potentially problematic, but I think it's worth the risk. Honestly, what's worse: kissing James Potter and humiliating yourself beyond belief or breaking the law and reversing time to stop yourself, risking your very own life?<p>

…

Forget it, I'm screwed.

* * *

><p>I very slowly sit up in my bed, staring wide-eyed at the wall across from me. Maybe…Maybe there's a chance that I could—perhaps—fancy James—<p>

Preposterous. One does not simply fancy a bloke after she has hated him for six years. That's barking! And me with James… James and I, together… James and I dating… James and I together at school and in Hogsmeade, having fun… That's…that's…

I lie back down on my bed and attempt to find more explainable reasons regarding what happened on the beach.

Preposterous, indeed.

* * *

><p>I end up spending the entire day in my room. I only come out for meals. Mum doesn't bring up James, and neither do I. Petunia and my dad look confused as to why I'm hiding so much, but they don't say anything about it.<p>

I go to bed at nine o'clock with a headache. Maybe inspiration will hit when I wake up in the morning.

* * *

><p>Inspiration hits. Well, not really. I just gained some courage overnight, and now I'm ready to do the impossible: Go talk to James.<p>

I have two plans. Plan A is to tell James that I had taken some cold medicine that morning, wasn't thinking properly, and kissed him. I don't want anything to change, so I think we should just forget it ever happened and move on.

If that doesn't convince him, I move to Plan B.

Plan B: Run away.

Plan A will be successful, though. There wouldn't be any harm in him forgetting, right? Right. Who cares if I have to spend the rest of my life wondering why I kissed him, if maybe I like him, if he likes me back, if we could be together? Who cares if I would have to spend forever getting the image of us together, on a date, in Hogsmeade, laughing and holding hands and strolling down the street, out of my head? As long as he forgets it and never brings it up again, I would be fine. I wouldn't end up having any permanent mental damage or anything…

It's lightly raining when I walk over to the Potters. It's not even noon yet. I'm not sure if this is a good or bad sign. It feels like a bad sign, but I'm trying to think back to every Divination lesson to see if forgetfulness and rain are positively linked.

I ring the Potters' doorbell, and right before I can chicken out and run away, James opens the door. He doesn't say anything when he sees that it's me, but he doesn't look upset. He looks calm…maybe even happy?

"Hi," I nervously say.

"Hey," he says.

I stand on his porch. I shiver a little in the rain, even though I had brought a jacket with me. "Can we talk?" I ask. I'm getting a bit exasperated. Yes, James, I know I kissed you and you hated it, but there's no reason to make this worse!

"Sure." James lets me inside. I walk in and hang my jacket on their coat rack.

James looks out the window at the rain before saying, "My mum's in the living room. We can talk in my room." I gulp. I'll be lucky if he only humiliates and rejects me one-third as much as I have done to him in the past.

I follow James upstairs and we walk into his room. I notice that it's a lot cleaner than usual.

Just as I'm about to put Plan A into action, Mrs. Potter calls James from downstairs.

"Yeah?" James shouts down to her.

"Can you come here?" she asks. "I need your help!"

James turns to me. "You can stay here. I'll be right back."

I nod. Once he leaves, I awkwardly look around his room. Am I allowed to sit? Is there even anywhere to sit besides his bed and floor? I am not sitting on his bed.

"James Potter!"

I look towards the door, but no one is there. Just before I decide that I'm hearing things, I hear it again.

"Prongs! James Potter! Hello? Are you there?" The voice of Sirius Black is coming from somewhere within James's room. I look around.

"Prongs! Are you even there? James Potter. James Potter, where the hell are you?" I walk towards James's closet, but Sirius gets quieter. I walk towards his dresser and he gets louder. I open up the first drawer and I see a bunch of junk. There's paper, candy wrappers, a mirror, and an old Snitch flies out and begins to zoom around the room.

"James?"

I pick up the mirror and almost drop it when I see Sirius's face in the mirror.

"Sirius?"

"Lily? What are you doing here? Is James there?"

I shake my head. "No, I just heard you, so I opened up this drawer and—" I stop talking. I had looked into the drawer again when I mentioned it, and I see my name written on one of the papers. I pick it up and carelessly put the mirror on top of the dresser. I really shouldn't be spying but…it has my name on the parchment. I even recognize the handwriting as belonging to Remus. I begin to read it, ignoring Sirius's "Lily? What are you doing? Bloody hell, did you leave?"

_Prongs,_

_You said so yourself in your last letter to me: This is your last chance with Lily. We have one more year at school with her and then we'll go our separate ways, and you will probably never see her again. And while yes, she does like me, I don't think I can be much help as to get her to like you. All I can say is essentially the same things I've been telling you for the past two years. Be nice. Don't be a prat. Try and take an interest in her, and not her chest. Then maybe with some luck she'll like you. Whereas I've told you this many times, you've never actually listened to me. I hope that you'll listen to me now when I tell you that spending the summer across the street from Lily is probably the greatest thing that can help you get her to like you. Don't be a git, be yourself, and you have a shot. _

_Best of luck,_

_Moony_

What. The. Hell.

"Evans? Are you even there?" Sirius asks. I ignore him and pick up more of the papers.

One appears to be a note between James and Sirius, later joined by Remus.

The first part is in James's handwriting. _Padfoot, do you think you can distract Snivellus after class so I can talk to Evans?_

_By talk to, do you mean attempt to charm her and get jinxed? _That has to be Sirius.

_Shut up and just agree to do it, will you?_

_All right. I've been meaning to try out a new hex I found anyway._

_**James, stop writing notes and pay attention to McGonagall! **_Remus had written. _**And you're going about it the wrong way. You've got to talk to her, NICELY, and stop hexing her best mate!**_

_No offense, Moony, but I think I know how to get a girl into a broom cupboard more than you._

That's all that's on that paper. I scan the next paper, which has all four of the Gryffindor boys' handwriting.

_What should we do this month? _

_I heard there's some caves up north. Let's scope it out._

_**I'm not so sure that's a good idea, guys…**_

**I'm in for anything, as long as we keep the cloak on us just in case.**

It continues, but it makes no sense and doesn't pertain to me. I hurriedly shuffle through the papers. The next one is a bunch of Quidditch plays. The one after that features random doodles with some animals (two dog-looking things, a deer, and a mouse), Quidditch equipment, Gryffindor crests, and a Snitch in the corner with two little letters etched inside: LE. I continue to look through the papers until I find one that makes my jaw drop. The title reads:

_Ways To Get Evans._

No. He. Didn't.

I scan down the paper, and the next one, and the next one, and I see that he made a list. A bloody list. I pick a random spot and start reading.

_Give Evans a victory kiss after winning Quidditch game. No one can resist a winner._

_Apparently she can._

_Tell her how beautiful she is._

_Supposedly she didn't get any sleep the night before and claimed she looked awful. She thought I was making fun of her. Got hexed._

_Have Sirius lock us in a broom closet together. _

_Got kneed where the light don't shine._

_Make sure all the boys in Hogwarts know she's off-limits. Then she'll have to date me._

_She found out. Got hexed. Badly._

_Charm Lily's favorite chair in the Common Room to sing to her how great I am and how she should date me._

_She transfigured it into a Quaffle-sized ball. Threw said ball at my face. _

_Listen to Remus's advice and be nice. _

_Asked her how her day was. She said it got bad the minute she saw me. Don't listen to Remus anymore._

I remember each and every one of these incidents, albeit vaguely. They all happened in fifth year, when James was absolutely awful, always flirting with me, and trying to get me to go on a date with him; although he never actually cared about me or tried to get to know me. I wonder how long he kept this goddamn list. Sixth year? I shuffle two more papers and reach what looks like the last page of the list. I realize my hands are shaking. Out of anger, embarrassment, or something else, I don't know.

_Get her to yell at me so then she realizes she missed it._

_She didn't react._

_Loudly tell an exciting story when she walks by._

_She ignored it._

_Hex a Slytherin in front of her so we'll fight and get a detention together._

_Just lost Gryffindor points._

_Ask if she can tutor me in Charms. _

_Said no. That's it._

_Offer to partner up in Potions class since she's so good at the subject._

_She partnered with Remus._

_Listen to Sirius's advice and date one of her friends to make her jealous._

_She doesn't care._

_Give up._

_Unsuccessful._

I stare at the parchment in my hands. I notice that the room is silent again. I guess Sirius gave up trying to talk to James or me. The last seven things were all from sixth year. He had kept a list from fifth year to sixth year to figure out ways to get me. And he had brought it here. He literally had to find it, pack all these ideas and papers about me, and bring them to the summerhouse. My hands start shaking even more. I don't know what emotion I feel more. Anger. Mortification. Longing. Regret. Disappointment. Hope. Confusion.

While I read those papers, for a moment I thought back to what it would be like to let myself like James, to date him. And I liked the idea. For a moment, I had genuinely liked the idea of being _with_ this James. It is in this moment where I think back to that feeling I had while reading the papers that I realize I like this James. I like this James, yet it wasn't ever real to him. It was as if it was one giant ploy. Pretend to be someone else the summer, get me to fall for him, win. He'll go back to being School Potter that first day of September, knowing that he was finally able to succeed in winning my heart. I can't believe I've been so stupid. How could I have honestly believed that out of nowhere James and I could be friends? That I could become—in a way—best mates with the real James Potter. I should've known it was all too good to be true.

"What are you doing?" a voice says. I look up and see James standing in the doorway. My stomach twists and my heart stops before rapidly beating again. I'm so confused as to how to react, what to say, what emotions I want to share and which ones I want to hide that I respond with my regular response to James: anger. Now all I feel is anger.

He looks apprehensive, but not scared. I feel as if I've been played, tricked, fooled. It's as if it was another one of the Marauders' plans. Like in fourth year when they decided to find a way to publicly hex and humiliate every member of the Slytherin Quidditch team in one day. James might as well have sat in a circle with his mates and said, "All right, pals, what do you think I should do to achieve the ultimate goal of getting Lily Evans to like me?", a quill poised at the ready.

"What are these?" I say, holding up the papers. My voice is scary-calm. Good.

James turns and closes his door before walking towards me. He doesn't get too close, only a few meters away. His cheeks are tinged pink, almost as if he is embarrassed. "They're my papers. Did you read them?"

"I read enough, you jerk," I snarl. James looks shocked. "You jerk! I can't believe you. It's been a game to you this entire time, hasn't it? You've been making lists and plans to try and figure out how to 'win' me because I'm the only girl who's said no to you. It doesn't matter if you were making me miserable and humiliating me, as long as your stupid plans worked and I finally said yes to you—"

"What? No!" James exclaims. "No, come on, Lily, it's not like that." I give him an incredulous look. "I mean, yeah, okay, I first noticed you like that in fifth year because you were the only girl who turned me down and you got hot over the summer,"—I bristle in fury, but he hurriedly continues—"but then once I noticed you I realized how much I liked you. Every time I asked you out was because I wanted you to be my girlfriend more than anyone else, not because you were some…prize!" James waves his hands in the air and takes a deep breath before continuing. "I made lists because I wanted you so badly and nothing ever seemed to work. Why else would I keep trying in every possible way? It wasn't ever a game!"

I'm not buying it.

"What about Jessica? Don't you still love her?" I mock.

"I never did," James replies. "I only dated her so you'd get jealous, and when you didn't I stayed with her so I could get over you. But it didn't work, so I broke up with her and told her the truth, which was that I still fancied you. After that I got with Claire so that maybe I'd have something to focus on and I wouldn't fuck up being friends with you, but then every time I hung out with her or kissed her, all I could think was that I wished it was you. And I realized I'd never be able to give up on you, not completely."

_Unsuccessful. Unsuccessful. Unsuccessful._

The word rings in my head, almost like a gong on a clock. I don't want to believe it, but I can't help and think that what he's saying makes sense. If James had really told Jessica he didn't want to be with her anymore because he still fancied me, that would explain all of the dirty looks and the red paint and the nasty stunts she'd pulled on me. And when I had caught he and Claire snogging, he refused to look at me… And he always got angry and quiet or left whenever Nate was around… And how excited he was and how he danced when all I said was that I'd give him a chance to be my friend… And he instinctively protected of me when those Death Eaters followed us, simply staring at me in a way I've never been stared at… Maybe he does genuinely like me…

_Unsuccessful. Unsuccessful. Unsuccessful._

"If that's true, then why didn't you kiss me back? You made it seem like kissing me repulsed you! You just froze up!" I say desperately.

James laughs and runs his fingers through his hair, making it stand up even more. "Bloody hell, what was I supposed to do? I'd wanted to kiss you for years and you hated me! _Hated me_! And these past few weeks…I literally had to force myself not to just go ahead and snog the magic out of you. So when _you _went and kissed _me_, I was so shocked I didn't know what to do. And then I was afraid that you had thought it was a mistake, so I didn't want to freak you out and demand you speak to me. But now that I know you like me—" He takes a step towards me, but I take a step back, banging into the dresser behind me.

I shake my head multiple times. "No, kissing you _was_ a mistake."

"No it wasn't," James earnestly says. "You fancy me now."

"No, I like James. Not Potter." I'm surprised I'm not hyperventilating by now. I feel like any second I will be.

"What the hell does that mean?" he asks.

I don't know how to explain it. It makes sense in my mind, but I don't know how to get it out into words. But I know I'm right, so I try anyway.

"Here you're James. And I like him. At school you're Potter. And I don't like him. You're two different people, and I know that as soon as school starts again, you're going to turn back into Potter. And I _don't_ like him. At all. So kissing you was a mistake. I'm sorry I got your hopes up." I try to walk out of the room because I feel dizzy and feverish and I can't handle talking about this, but I can't leave because a hand jerks me back. I'm facing James again.

He looks cross with me now. Extremely cross. "I don't believe this. You're going to be this stubborn? What were you going to do when school started?" His voice steadily gets louder with each word. "Ignore me again and pretend nothing ever happened over the summer? You're not even going to accept it?"

"ACCEPT WHAT?" I scream.

"THAT YOU LIKE ME, TOO! The minute you realize it, you make it out like I have multiple personalities so you'll have an excuse. Merlin, you're so-!"

"So WHAT, Potter?"

"So YOU!" he roars. "You're stubborn and oblivious and a pain in the arse!"

I blink. The Snitch is still zooming around the room. Just as I'm about to retort, he continues at an even louder volume.

"And you're smart and kind and unbelievably beautiful! You're the one who loves to follow the rules, but refuses to change who you are no matter what anyone else says or thinks! You're funny and sarcastic and you want the best for people! You're so _Lily Evans_! But you can't even accept the fact that I love you and that you might feel the same way for me!"

"I don't know you!" I tell him. "One minute you're bullying innocent kids and the next you're comforting me! You infuriate me for six years and then you make me laugh and we're hanging out every day!"

"Maybe I changed! Maybe I grew up; maybe you only saw the bad side of me because you make me more nervous than anyone else in the world, so I act like an idiot the second you're around. Maybe that's just who I am!" James looks mad, irritated. It's just like we're back at school. Except we never argued about anything like this.

"Well I don't like him!" I scream. I'm surprised Mrs. Potter doesn't come upstairs to see what's going on. Then again, she could've already called my mum and they're downstairs eating popcorn and listening to the show.

"Then why did you kiss me?" James calmly inquires. "Why, Lily?"

"I don't know!" I cry. I feel better yelling. I can hide behind my anger.

James's eyes flash. "Tell me when you figure it out!"

"Fine! I'm leaving!" I start to walk towards the door again.

"Good, I wouldn't want to change personalities in front of you!" James sarcastically says.

I whirl around with my hand on the doorknob. "Oh, shut up," I snap.

"Who, James or Potter?"

I give the maddening boy in front of me a very rude hand gesture before slamming the door behind me. I actually wanted to scream words that would make my mother gasp and cast illegal jinxes at him left and right, but if Mrs. Potter is listening, that probably wouldn't be the best idea.

I stomp down the stairs (I don't see Mrs. Potter) and run out of the house, cursing James Potter all the way home.

* * *

><p><strong>Pretty positive that when you all demanded an update, this wasn't what you had in mind... But I have a plan, I swear!<strong>

**Also, I feel really, really nervous about this chapter. Like more nervous than any other chapters. PLEASE review and tell me your honest opinions! **

**IMPORTANT: There will NOT be a sequel. All I'd want to write about it Christmas break or something with James and Lily broken up, and no one wants to read about that, so sorry, but no followup for this story!**

**Next chapter should be up sooner than this one was.**

**MG**


	21. Tell Me What to Do

**Yes, I know, that update took way too long, how dare I keep you all waiting, half of you probably still want to kill me, etc. etc. Bottom line: I got the nastiest virus on my computer and couldn't access any of my files. Now onward.**

**I really want to post this, so thank you, thank you to EVERYONE who reviewed, but as of now I'm just going to respond to people who asked specific questions/made certain comments in their reviews I feel require a response. I love everybody though!**

**anavihs (thanks! Yeah, James has been very bipolar/jerkish before, Lily deserves some confusion/snootiness! It won't last long, though, don't worry. ;), Dancerwithlove (Yeah, sorry. :/ I have tons of L/J suggestions, though, to keep you EXTREMELY satisfied!), SiriuslySiera (Thank you so so much. :)) But yes, there are some VERY talented published authors out there and others...), Ragnorakxkitty (Thanks! And yay obsessive fans! Ha. :3), Senta100 (No, this fic finishes on the first of September, and even then that's just a little bit), alohamora080 (Agreed! I love tempermental, comeback, not-going-to-take-your-crap James! I do think he's always had a little soft spot for Lily though), accio-food (Anything between 2-4 chaps), xXjaziXx (thank you soo much :D), AcrossTheWater (I've heard there was an encylcopedia or something that went for like a billion dollars and all the $$ was donated to charity. If JK could do anything, anything at all, I would absolutely die of happiness if it could be a HP prequel, with the Marauders and Jame and Lily getting together and all that good stuff!), BlindMindLover (you're flattering reviews make my days better. ;D [lol, does that sound creepy? it sounds so creeper to me. xP), jwtwifan (congrats!), YoungAndLiving (I reccomend Ben and Jerry's Milk and Cookies ice cream. ;P), Hectate'sMushroomMinions (Thank you so much! ^_^ But yes, review numbers sometimes bother me. Like when people write stories and you sit there wondering if they even read the book with the complete OOCness and grammar and spelling issues and they have like 3407435748 reviews saying how amazing they write, only because I feel like you're getting someones hopes up by being polite instead of making them feel better, you know?), Sigmoid Darkz (James and Lily ARE their fights!), Tyem Marodyor (No original stories, but ironically you're like the fifth person to reccomend me writing some, even though I've never ever thought about it. Thanks for the feedback! :), and Ms. Nuns Jean Ears (uh-oh...). **

**Many asked, but no, Sirius did NOT hear the conversation in the mirror. He gave up trying to reach James after Lily got all quiet and started ignoring him, so he "turned off" the mirror. He couldn't have heard anything unless he tried to call James again or if one of them had said his name/called him, and neither of those things happened. With good reason!**

* * *

><p>After I had hid in my dormitory for an entire day because of The Incident, I swore that I'd never let James or Snape get the best of me and make me hide again. If anything else happened, they would be the ones hiding, not me.<p>

But here I am, hiding in my room, because of James. Again. This is the second time in less than a week. Do I want to be hiding/cowering/sulking in my room? God no. Do I know what I should do rather than hiding/cowering/sulking in my room? Hell no. So I stay in my room. For a good couple of hours, might I add.

I don't want to think. I don't want to decide. I don't want to confront these feelings I may/may not have. All I want is for James to go back to being awful and easy to dislike. Or for him to not like me. Or for someone to just tell me what to do. But no one knows. I'm too embarrassed to tell my mum right now, although I know she's upset that I'm hiding in my room, refusing to talk. And it's not like I have any friends who can simply come over, comfort me, and give me advice that will make me change my mind about transferring schools. I'm completely alone.

Claire does come over, but I have my mum tell her that I have a stomach bug. I'm becoming a compulsive liar. Yet I can't bring myself to care.

So I sit in my room and read. And then I make random objects fly around. And then I let Clarence out of his cage so he can fly around while I lie on my back and throw treats in the air for him. I try not to think about anything that rhymes with Fames and Rotter. Because the second I do, I want to cry and scream into a pillow.

Just as I throw an eleventh owl treat in the air (Clarence is going to get so fat), I begin to talk to him.

"You're so lucky you have a simple life, Clarence. At school you just get to sit around in the Owelry and hoot and poop. I bet there are a bunch of nice owls up there, too. I bet there isn't a bully owl that turns nice and then tells you she loves you. And I bet that if that was to happen you most certainly wouldn't be considering actually liking back this bully owl."

Clarence hoots at me to hurry up and throw him another treat.

"Because a nice owl like you shouldn't want to maybe, possibly snog and/or date this bully owl. Because nice owls don't fancy bully owls. Hell,"—I throw a twelfth treat in the air—"owls don't fancy each other! All they fancy is sending letters. Like friend letters, love letters, letters on how to get certain girls to fall in love with certain boys…" I begin to think about a specific boy with glasses. I quickly shake my head and try to think of more letters. "Invitation letters, emergency letters—" I sit up with a jolt. "That's it!"

I run over to my desk and pull out a quill and some paper. I can't believe I didn't think of this earlier. I mean, Mr. McKinnon likes me. He knows Mum's sick. If Marlene tells him she needs ONE afternoon off because I'm having an emergency, then she can tell me what to do! Mr. McKinnon can't be heartless enough to tell her she can't have a long lunch break!

Besides, Clarence sucks at giving advice.

_Marlene,_ I write.

_THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. TELL YOUR FATHER I'M HAVING AN AWFUL, HORRIBLE, TERRIBLE CRISIS. MAKE SOMETHING UP, BECAUSE YOU CAN'T TELL HIM THE AWFUL, HORRIBLE, TERRIBLE TRUTH._

_Because the truth is that I kissed James Potter and then ran away and then went to find him and then found out that he's been planning and making lists and getting advice to get me to be his girlfriend for two years and then he told me he loved me and then I yelled at him—a lot—and then we yelled at each other and then I told him I can't like him because he's James and Potter and then we yelled some more and then I ran out and then my owl didn't help me out. _

_Oh, and I might have fallen under the Hogwarts curse and now fancy James. A lot. _

_AND THAT'S WHY I'M HAVING AN AWFUL, HORRIBLE, TERRIBLE CRISIS! BUT YOU CAN'T TELL YOUR DAD, SO YOU HAVE TO MAKE SOMETHING UP AND WRITE BACK AND TELL ME YOU'LL MEET ME AT FLOREAN'S FOR AN __EMERGENCY __MEETING. I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU MAKE UP, BUT IT HAS TO BE SOMETHING GOOD AND AWFUL AND HORRIBLE AND TERRIBLE, BECAUSE I NEED YOU, MARLENE! I'M TALKING TO MY OWL, FOR MERLIN'S SAKE!_

_Hope you're well._

_Love, _

_Lily_

I write in capital letters so that she will see the urgency of the situation. I considered writing 'STOP' after every sentence instead of a period for dramatic effect, but then I realized that Marlene wouldn't understand it and she'd think I was completely off my rocker.

I make Clarence stop flying and give him the letter. I look deep into his black eyes. "Listen, Clarence. This is an emergency. You have to stay there until Marlene gets the letter and writes back. _Stay there_," I urgently say. I open a window and balance Clarence on my arm. "My sanity rests on your wings, Clarence," I say. And then I let the little bird fly away.

* * *

><p>Clarence doesn't return until the next morning. I get up and try to go talk to my mum a couple of times about what had happened, but every time I attempt to, I panic and just stay in my room. The first thing Mum would ask would be, "Well, do you like James, Lily?" And I haven't worked out the answer yet, because he's so. Bloody. Confusing!<p>

But when Clarence does arrive with a letter from Marlene, I feel as if a weight has been taken off my shoulders, even before I open up the parchment.

_Lily,_ it reads.

_Clarence sat around my house all day waiting for me. I'm sorry I didn't get the letter right after you sent it, but now that I intern at the Ministry, Dad makes sure my mail immediately goes to sit in my room until I get home._

_I will tell you, though, that when I read your letter I screamed and almost Apparated to your house. _

_I'll save my questions, demands, and squeals for tomorrow, though. That's a yes, by the way. I asked my dad and he said no, but then I told him you are in an "awful, horrible, terrible state" and that you need me for just two hours tomorrow._

_He gave me one hour._

_Merlin, he's so strict. Anyway, Florean's at noon tomorrow. I only have an hour, so don't be late!_

_Marlene_

"YES!" I look at the clock and see that it's already 11:34. What took Clarence so long? Probably too frightened to go back to his barmy owner. I get ready to go and run out of my room to find my mother.

She and Petunia are in the living room together.

"Mum," I say, not even caring that I'm interrupting Petunia, "Marlene's having an emergency and really needs me. Can I have lunch with her today at Diagon Alley?"

So it was a little lie. Whatever. I'll handle this addiction later.

Mum looks suspicious already. "Okay," she says. "But can we talk when you get back?" She says it kindly, but I know my mum, and I know what she actually means. She's not asking me to tell her what's going on; she's demanding. I try not to gulp.

"Sure," I say.

I try to think positive. By the time I get back from lunch with Marlene, I'll know exactly what to do.

* * *

><p>Florean Fortescue's ice cream shop is as chilly and as welcoming as always. Little kids are dripping ice cream down their shirts and my best friend is sitting at our favorite table on the inside. I weave around the tables to get to her.<p>

I'd seen a few of my classmates in Diagon Alley, such as Mary, Tasha, Mulciber, Wes, Irina, and Bert. I had said hi to most of them (except Mulciber and Wes), but I didn't stop to catch up. I was a girl on a mission. A girl on a mission with a crisis.

The closer I get to Marlene, the more I notice her face. It's as frozen as the Black Lake on Christmas morning. I don't even think she's blinking. Why does it look like I'm about to get yelled at? Oh, shite.

Once I'm standing at the table, she calmly says, "Sit down, Lily Evans." I gulp and cautiously sit in the seat opposite her.

I open my mouth to speak, but Marlene's shriek cuts me off.

"YOU KISSED JAMES POTTER?"

"Shh!" I lunge across the table and try and shush her with my hands. She pushes them away.

"You, Lily Evans, kissed James Potter! What the hell happened this summer?" She starts rambling. "And he told you he loved you? As in, LOVE? I mean, yeah, we all knew he fancied the pants off of you, but love…" She shakes her head. "I didn't think he loved you. At least, not enough to admit it to himself, let alone say it to _you_! Merlin, he has some guts. I mean, you turned him down all those times and—Oh no. What did you say, Lily? What happened? Are you guys dating now? Did you break his heart? I bet you did. Lily, how could you—?"

I put my elbows on the table and my head in my hands. I don't think I can face telling her the truth. But of course, I will. "I can't deal with this, Marlene. Not without sugar."

"What?" Marlene asks. "Oh, yeah, 'course." She gets up and walks to the ice cream counter. I follow her.

Mr. Fortescue, a friendly man in his thirties, turns to us with a smile. "Hi, ladies. The usual, Miss McKinnon?"

Marlene nods. Fortescue gets Marlene her ice cream in the regular medium sized cup. She hands over her coins before getting her ice cream, and then Fortescue turns to me.

"And Miss Evans? The usual, as well, I presume?"

I nod. But when Fortescue reaches for my usual medium cup, I eye the plastic bowl.

"Actually, can I have the usual in the largest cup you have, please?" I politely ask.

Fortescue and Marlene look at me, but the man puts the medium cup back and grabs the extra large one. Just before he fills it with ice cream, I interrupt him again.

"I'm sorry," I say, "but don't you have anything bigger?"

Fortescue looks at me. "No, Miss Evans, this is the largest." He leans down to scoop the green ice cream, but I stop him. Again.

"Could I just have that cup real quick?" I ask.

Fortescue stares at me. He blinks, and then he hands me the cup. I pull out my wand; I point it at the purple and white bowl and say, "_Engorgio_."

The cup grows half of its original size. I think about James bloody Potter again. I tip my wand at the cup and say more forcefully, "_Engorgio_." The cup is now twice the size of the original large one, and I'm satisfied. I hand it back to Fortescue.

"Okay, fill that sucker up with ice cream, and I'll pay you double the price of the large."

Fortescue doesn't move. "Um, Miss Lily, I don't think having this much ice cream is very healthy. At least, not with all the stuff you put on it. You could get sick…"

"I don't care," I snap. "I'm having a damn bad day, because James BLOODY Potter loves me and I snogged him and then ran away. TWICE. I mean, have _you_ ever snogged your enemy, Mr. Fortescue? Has _your_ enemy ever told you he loves you? Have _you_ spent an entire summer being mates with said enemy? I don't think you have! Because bollocks like this only happens to _me_, because _someone_ out there hates me! So I'll eat as much junk as I can and get fat and ugly, and that's that!"

A couple people look over at me. I guess you don't often see a crazy teenage customer raise her voice at the shop owner. I blush. Fortescue lets out a low whistle.

"Bloody hell, I'll give it to you for free if you just relax," he mutters while scooping out the ice cream. I realize how awful it was of me to raise my voice at Fortescue. _He_ certainly didn't do anything.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Fortescue," I say. "I'm just…not having a very good day."

Fortescue fills my cup all the way to the top with mint ice cream and puts on my desired toppings. He nods his hand. "I understand." He hands me my ice cream; I hand him his Sickles. And then I hand him a Galleon as a tip and a 'please-don't-hate-me-for-being-such-a-freak.' I guiltily walk away with Marlene. We sit back at our table and she looks at me.

"You have some explaining to do," she says, pointing her spoon at me.

And I do.

I tell her everything, some important stuff, others unnecessary. I bounce all around the place as I tell her about my summer and James. When I finally finish on me storming out of James's room yesterday, she stares at me for a long time.

"Well what are you going to do?" she finally asks.

I almost choke on my ice cream. "Me? You're supposed to tell me what to do!"

Marlene shakes her head. "Sorry, that's not how it works. Now what are you going to do?"

I gawk at her, my mouth open. Finally I close it and try to evenly ask, "What would you do?"

Marlene bites her lip for a moment. She obviously doesn't want to answer. I try and open my eyes real wide and make myself cry. I guess it works because she sighs and says, "I would take a chance on James." I almost gasp. "All I'm saying, Lily, is that…he's liked you for a while. And I know he's been a jerk at school, but he's not that bad anymore. I think he grew up. And if what you said is true, he's different this summer. And maybe not because he's a different person, but because he really tried to get you to see the real him and how he's not as bad as the bloke you started hating at the age of eleven."

"But he's so…_ugh!_ at school. What if I think I can start something with James in the summer, but it all falls to pieces at school because he turns back into a jerk?"

The blonde across from me shrugs. "I don't know. There's no way to really know. But from what you've told me, it sounds like you _really_ like the boy across the street from you. And if I know one thing, it's that he would treat you right. And you and I may not know James in the same way, but I typically do think of him as a friend. That kind of stuff counts for something."

I try and process all that, but Marlene looks at her watch and jumps up in the air. "Bugger! Lily, I was supposed to be back five minutes ago! Look, I'm sorry it was short, but… Anyway, write to me and tell me everything, okay?"

"Okay." I hug Marlene.

She wraps her arms around me, and then runs out of the parlor.

I dip my spoon into my bowl to get some ice cream, but all I get is air. I disbelievingly look into the cup. It's all gone? No way.

I miserably look down at my stomach, which is pudgier. Fortescue was right: The ice cream made me feel sick, and I don't feel a bit better. Only fatter.

* * *

><p>Ever so softly, I crawl into my mum's bed. When I got home, Petunia had said Mum was taking a nap. (Dad left again this morning.) I peeked into her room and saw that she was. I could've just gone back to hiding in my room, but I didn't want to.<p>

I slide under my mum's fluffy blankets and curl up in a ball to think about what Marlene had said.

Why couldn't it be that easy? Why couldn't I just say, "Okay, James. I'll try it."? Why can't I just pretend that Potter doesn't exist and be happy with James?

_Because Potter does exist_, I answer myself. _And you've known him way longer than James._

And I just _don't_ like Potter. I can hardly stand being in the same room with him, and there's no way I'm going to risk this in the hopes that James will stay forever. Because he won't. Potter will come back and my James will disappear.

I foolishly sniffle. Mum stirs and then she slowly opens her eyes and sees me in her bed.

"Lily? What-?"

"I kissed James," I blurt out.

"What?" Mum says again.

Before I realize it, I retell the kiss, me running off, how disappointed I felt when James didn't kiss me back, James's lists, our fight, and my debate on James versus Potter. Mum doesn't say a word throughout my entire story, only occasionally wrinkling her brows or nodding her head.

"What do I do?" I whine to my mum before she has the chance to ask me herself.

Mum reaches out and begins to stroke my hair. "Sweetie, you know I can't make that decision for you."

I angrily huff at my mum. "That doesn't help at all! I don't know what to do. I like James, but I don't like Potter. You've heard me, Mum. How many times have I complained about him in the past six years? Four hundred times sounds accurate, don't you think? How can I fancy a boy I've hated? It just doesn't work that way!"

"Maybe not usually," Mum says. "But love works in funny ways, Lily. Moreover—what I say, I say as a completely neutral party—I know that James looks at you differently. Whenever he's over, he's always sneaking peaks at you, or his eyes light up when you say his name. Boys don't look at just any girl like that."

I'm ashamed to say my heart does a little flip when my mum says this. I try and ignore it.

"Yes, but just because he loves me doesn't mean he deserves for me to love him!" I exclaim. "Would you want me to be with someone who bullied and teased others and embarrassed me and showed off?"

Mum gently shakes her hand. "No, Lily. I wouldn't want you to be with someone who's just that. I want you to be with someone who is kind and who loves you. Someone I know will take care of you and who'd want to be able to earn your hand. Someone who realizes just how special he would be if you did say yes to him. I want you to be with someone who will ultimately make you happy, not sad or angry or confused."

James is kind. James says he loves me. He's been willing to work for me. He said he'd take care of me this next year and even after Hogwarts. If I said yes to James, would he realize how special he would be? And does he make me happy? Yes, he makes me happy. But he also makes me sad and angry and confused and irritated and annoyed.

"If your heart is telling you not to be with James, don't be with him. If it is…I expect you should go talk to him. We only have four more days here." And then she closes her eyes and begins to sleep again. Really? If she wasn't sick, I would wake her up and demand she give me better advice. But because she is, I leave her room, leave the house, and go walk on the beach to try and sort everything out.

A few weeks ago, I didn't even know if James would still be here when the first of September rolled around. Summer James could say a quick "Good-bye, Lily!" and then School Potter would come in and say, "Hey, Evans, want to watch me hex people?"

And James and I've never been able to be friends at school before, so what would be different this time? School Potter and I have never gotten along. How could we even be together?

_You've never actually gotten to know him in the past_, a voice in my head tells me.

That's true, but I always thought I knew plenty about him. I know that at school he liked to showoff and be the center of the attention. He had a habit of playing jokes and messing with other people, and he thought he was bloody amazing. All those characteristics make one git I don't want as a friend (or more). How can that person exist in the same body as the one I've been with for the past two months? Summer James is… All of that as well, though.

Summer James is still cocky. He still rumples up his hair. I don't know if he's pulled a prank on anyone here, but I know that he'd still jump at the chance to pull one with his friends.

So then why is Summer James so much better than School Potter?

_Because there's more to Summer James_, the voice says.

Summer James may be overconfident, but he's not selfish and he doesn't look down on people that are different or perhaps not as talented as him.

Summer James may like to pull pranks and tease still, but he isn't spiteful and he doesn't go out of his way to intentionally harm others (although he has—regretfully—done it in the past).

Summer James may have a lot of flaws, but among his stubbornness, arrogance, and prankster side, he's loyal, brave, caring, charming, and funny.

I still like to be around him, even though he may make me want to scream sometimes. I still have fun with him, even though he can be so infuriating.

And he makes me happy. James just makes me happy. Simple as that. I like talking to him. I like laughing with him. He's made me angry and he's made me upset this summer, but if he didn't make me happy, why would I go back and be friends again with him? It's like the same with my parents. They fight and argue, and my dad's slept on the couch a couple of times, but after nineteen years, they still say "I love you" to each other almost every day.

James is different this summer, but not a different person. He was James in first year, he was James at fifteen, he was James this summer, and come September 1, he will still be James.

I was wrong. He hasn't changed at all, and a year and a half ago he wasn't just a bullying toerag. Because even when I hated him, he was still James.

School Potter doesn't exist. School Potter is the bad things I knew about James Potter. There's no Summer James either. Summer James is just the shocking new things of James Potter that I discovered and liked.

Suddenly, it makes very much sense for James Potter to be one pretty damn amazing person.

* * *

><p><strong>Also not the chapter anyone expected or wanted, but whatever. Hopefully no one thinks I'm dragging this out for reviewstime/misery/whatever. I really wanted this chapter to be in here, and it was always going to be. **

**I had a lot of fun writing this, so hopefully you had fun reading it? :) Whatever.**

**Because I took so long with this update, and I (unfortunately) can't gurantee a speedy update, I'm going to give you a teaser! Ta-da! I know they hold me over when TLAT has excrutiatingly long breaks between its amazing-filled chapters.**

**TEASER:**

**"I write a quick letter to Marlene. And by quick, I mean one line. The one line says, _I bloody fancy him and I'm going to go tell him._"**

**Okay, so that was a fail of a teaser, but essentially it's a promise to come? Oh, another promise. A non-James Marauder will appear in some shape or form. :D**

**Please review!**

**MG**


	22. Absolutely Sure

**I wish I could begin to explain how sorry I am. I wish I could. I am so, so sorry. There really isn't an excuse that makes the wait all right, and I'm not going to make up a bunch of ones because in actuality there wasn't a good one and you guys don't deserve excuses. Honestly, though, I just didn't want to write. Things have been...just being life, and I didn't want to write. At all. Other things happened to, but no matter what they were, I hope you can forgive me for the wait.**

**To the anon(s), I really do hope that you don't have an account, and weren't actually just not signing in so you could be more brash in your reviews. If you had an account, I would've PMed you ASAP to let you know that I have not given up on the story.**

**Speaking of that, though, I have not nor will I ever give up on a story. Period. The only thing that would make me completely and utterly abandon a story is if something extreme happened, and I mean extreme. Also, I will not post a 200 word chapter just to say I am running late on an update. I don't want to get your hopes up, those A/N chapters are annoying, and it's seriously against FF's rules to post just a chapter as an Author's Note. I wasn't going to do that.**

**I do thank all of you, however, you have been encouraging me and gave me great feedback since the last chapter. No specified thanks this chapter, but everyone should know by now how precious all the reviews, alerts, and favorites are to me.**

**I've made you wait long enough for this chapter, so I won't delay it any more with pointless ramblings. **

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><p>I wait until the next morning to go talk to James. I try to get a good night's sleep. Maybe it will give me more courage. Merlin knows I need it. I'm practically shaking at the idea of what I'm going to do.<p>

But when I wake up on the twenty-sixth of August, I'm still just as nervous. I know I have to do it, though. Mum had told me yesterday to listen to my heart. And right now it's telling me to go to the Potters and put it all on the line.

I walk into the bathroom to do my hair and makeup, because I obviously do want to look like a troll when I profess my feelings to James. I can't help but take my time to get ready, extending my ten-minute morning routine into thirty minutes.

Just as I am ready to leave my room and go to James's, however, fate has another idea. An unfamiliar, black, regal looking owl is sitting on my dresser, patiently waiting for me to take the letter from his beak. I hastily take the letter, a nervous feeling irrationally forming in my stomach, and open it.

_Evans,_

_Is James all right? Normally I wouldn't ever confide in you (no offense), but since you're practically living with James, you might know what's wrong. Ever since the day you answered the mirror, he's been acting all out of sorts. He doesn't want to talk to anyone of us, which is odd, because even if he's furious he'd want to rant about it for hours, or at least suggest we go play Quidditch and pull some pranks. But he just…broods. He didn't answer any of my calls on the mirror (I'm assuming he explained how it worked to you after you found it), and I got a bit nervous—don't tell him that, though—so I Apparated over just to find him in his room, basically moping and throwing a Quaffle around. _

_I assumed he was upset because of Mr. Potter, but when I asked he just clenched his teeth and said no. If it was because of Mr. Potter, he wouldn't have said anything. I let it go, because really, if he wants to act like a little shit, he can for a couple minutes, then he's got to knock it off. But he didn't. He kept on acting like that right up until he told me I should leave, only about fifteen minutes after I arrived. _

_I asked Remus and Peter if they knew what was up, but they didn't. Pete wrote a letter to James (some made up stuff about girl issues) because James sort of has a soft spot for Peter—again, don't tell him you know that—and we figured he's most likely to answer Peter and tell him what was wrong. But later Peter wrote back and said all James had written in response is that birds were full of… Anyway, it didn't work._

_Remus is over at James's now, but it won't do much good. You were the last one who was with James before he started acting like this. And don't take this personally, but three-fourths of the time you're the reason behind Prongs's bad moods. I can only imagine what happened now if it was something between you too._

_Write back immediately, because Peter's about to wet himself with worry for James._

_Sirius_

Well, isn't that bloody fantastic. Not only is James so mad at me he refuses to speak to me, he won't talk to his mates either. Wonderful.

I sit down to write to Sirius, deciding to be entirely honest.

* * *

><p><em>Sirius,<em>

_Unfortunately, this is one of those times where I am the reason behind James's bad mood. To summarize it all (and because I'm not quite sure what you already know), I kissed James, but then I thought it was a mistake so I left. And then I went to his house to tell him that, but he had to go help his mum for a second, so I was waiting for him in his room when your voice came out of one of the drawers. I opened it and found the mirror, but I also found a bunch of paper, much of which consisted of tactics to win me over. I got angry, James got angry—you've seen this happen a bunch of times, I'm sure you know how it ended. (Oh, and I might have told James that he has multiple personalities so that is why I can't fancy him back.) I stormed out yelling, James yelled back at me, and here I am, writing to you. James is angry with me because I failed to reciprocate his feelings yet again and I suppose that he's so angry he won't even talk to you._

_So yes, I do know why he is upset: because I'm stupid._

_But no, I do not know if he is all right at this point. My guess is no._

_Lily_

* * *

><p><em>Evans, <em>

_I want you to know that an enormous part of me wants to use all of this parchment telling you how thick you really are. I would first demand what would possess you to kiss James when you know just how he would react. Then I would tell you that you really are dumb if you thought going to James's house to tell him kissing him was a mistake was a good idea. Then I would say you shouldn't be snooping, no matter how curious you are, because it just leads to bad situations (as you clearly now know of). Then I would use very strong words to tell you that Prongs doesn't have "multiple personalities," you're just… Lily Evans._

_But I won't. Instead, I will summarize all of that with one sentence: Lily Evans, you may be in the top of our class, and Prongs may think you're smarter than all the professors combined, but you are actually the most daft witch I have ever met._

_And no, he's not all right, Moony just got back from James's and said so._

_How are you going to fix this, Evans?_

_Sirius_

* * *

><p><em>Black,<em>

_I hope you know that I don't need an arrogant arse like you to tell me how stupid I am; I already know it._

_But for your information, I was just going to go over and tell James that I actually do fancy him, and that I do want to be with him._

_Evans_

* * *

><p><em>But do you actually fancy him?<em>

* * *

><p><em>Yes.<em>

* * *

><p><em>Are you sure, Evans?<em>

* * *

><p><em>Yes, I'm sure. Absolutely.<br>But just say, for example, I wasn't sure. How would I know for sure?_

* * *

><p><em>Evans, <em>

_The only reason I'm even going to attempt to understand your crazy mind is because I know how important you've been to James for the past two years, even if you didn't like it. I've had to listen to him go on and on about you longer than any bloke should have to listen to how perfect a girl is, and I don't want to find out that you fucked him over another time. I don't, Evans, so don't do anything until you're completely sure, because we all know how your feelings for James change more often than the international Quidditch rankings, but this isn't a game to him. It hasn't been for a long time._

_Think about all the ridiculous things James has done for you. Stopped a Quidditch game to ask you out. Hexed the Slytherins who tried to flirt with you. Managed to convince Flitwick that he was the one that had girlishly laughed so hard that instead of charming the water into shapes, he had given the little wizard a refreshing shower—just so you wouldn't get in trouble. _

_Then there's the things you don't know. Like how James caught Harvey Beckwith snogging Julia Finkle two weeks after Beckwith had asked you to be his girlfriend that day in Hogsmeade. Prongs stressed about what to do for three days, and then he finally decided to threaten Beckwith with his life to kindly break up with you and never talk to you again because he said you deserved better. He didn't even think about using the information to his advantage. There was also the time James stayed up all night scouring the castle for your Transfiguration textbook. He had seen you telling Marlene—very upset, might I add—that you lost your book, and that it had all the notes and drafts in it for the essay due the next morning (the one you spent two weeks working on). You said you looked everywhere, absolutely everywhere, but James knew how important that essay was, especially to you, so he spent all night looking for it, and he finally found it and left it outside your door at five thirty in the morning. He didn't do his essay. He got two detentions and a zero on it._ _And then the time where you ran out of the Common Room crying. I could see it—in the way his eyes glazed over, from the way his hands were slightly clenched—that he wanted to go after you and help you. He found Remus, though, and made him check on you because he knew how you hated him._

_He was almost always thinking about you, Evans. It was maddening, actually, that I was able to know that you had turned him down on a date by a slam of a book, or that I instantly knew when you were in a broom cupboard with MacMillan because James would grit his teeth and sit up perfectly straight. _

_It all sounds barmy, and it is—I've been telling him for years that it's crazy to like a bird so much when he could have anyone else, particularly someone that could stand being in the same room with him. But he never listened. Not to me, at least. Sometimes he listened to Remus's realistic advice. He always listened to Peter's encouraging words to never give up. But he never listened to me when I told him that you just weren't going to ever like him, period. _

_So if you go tell James you fancy him, you be sure of it, Evans. Be absolutely sure that you fancy James the barmy, ridiculous way he's been liking you for more than his mates can handle. Because unbelievably, I like you, and I know nothing would make Prongs happier than for you to like him, so if you two get together, I want it to be for real. No questions, no doubts, just you and him. _

_Sirius_

_P.S. Sorry this is how you had to find out about Beckwith. He was an arse, though._

* * *

><p>I read Sirius's letter, and then I read it again. As I take in the words, slowly and carefully, I get the same feeling in my chest that I got as I walked on the beach, realized James was James, and that I liked him. Almost as if there was a strain, a swelling of my heart.<p>

Would I drop almost anything to talk to James? Would I make sure to keep away evil girls that tried to be with him? Would I take the blame for him, even though he really did deserve to get in trouble?

Yes, yes, and yes.

Would I do everything I could to make sure some insignificant Ravenclaw wouldn't hurt him? Would I skip sleeping and doing my own essay to help him? Would I put what would help him before what I wanted to do?

Yes, yes, and yes.

If James did decide to never like me or speak to me again, would I (subtly) keep on trying? Would I keep that hope alive, that swelling of my heart?

Yes and yes.

And there's my answer. The one I've been stupidly avoiding. Blatantly disregarding. Cowardly hiding from.

I almost want to laugh. It would take me this long to figure it out! I'm not surprised at all that it would take me six years and one summer to realize that James Potter is the boy for me. Not to mention that I disliked the bloke for six years and one-fourth of a summer. Really, though, this will be a smashing story to tell our kids.

…

But before I start thinking about adorable crossover kids between James and I, I must tell him I fancy the trousers off of him. And I will do it. I am determined. Because even if he rejects me, at least I know that I tried. And if James can face rejection for two years and not give up hope, I can confidently face the possibility of a rejection, too.

But seriously, I really hope I don't have to get a rejection. That would be the worst way for this summer to end. I don't even want to think about.

Before I go, I write a quick letter to Marlene. And by quick, I mean one line. The one line says, _I bloody fancy him and I'm going to go tell him. Wish me luck!_

Just as I'm handing Marlene's letter to Clarence, however, I think of Sirius. Oh, what the heck. I copy the exact same letter down and write Sirius's name on the outside.

"One for Marlene and one for Sirius Black," I say to my owl before quickly leaving my room.

I tell my mum that I'm going to go see James. She nods and smiles at me. I can tell she knows what I'm going to do.

The walk across the street feels ridiculously fast and slow, all at the same time. How is that even possible?

And then I'm standing on the porch of the yellow house and after I take a minute (or three) to compose what I'm going to say, I ring the doorbell.

Mrs. Potter opens the door only a moment later, as if she had been waiting for me.

"Hello, Lily," she says. She smiles at me. I try to smile back, but I feel like my heart is in my throat. No, it isn't. I'm confident. Calm and confident. Determined. "Are you here for James?" she asks. I nod again. I want him to know, I do.

"I'll go upstairs and get him," the elderly woman says before turning to go upstairs.

I thank the stars for her suggestion. If she had told me to go upstairs and get him myself, I might have just died. The last thing I need is to be in James's room again. We always end up arguing there.

I see James coming down the hall, his hair messy, his shirt slightly rumpled, his face guarded and blank. My heart leaps. At the sight of him or at the realization that I'm actually going to do this, I don't know. Probably both. I've never done this before—walked straight up to a bloke and told him I want to be with him, that is. Then again, at a closer inspection of James, I feel my heart leap again before pounding a bit harder. He is quite handsome.

"Hi," I say. I attempt to smile.

"Hey." He doesn't smile. At all.

"Care to go on a walk along the beach with me?" I ask.

Please say yes, please say yes, for the sake of my sanity, SAY YES!

"I suppose," James says. He has yet to look me in the eyes. I shove away the bad feeling I already have; this is what I want to do. "Mum, I'm going out with Evans!" he calls to the house. I note the use of my surname and inwardly cringe. Now I can feel myself begin to panic. Just getting him to forgive me, listen to me, hell, _look at me_ is going to be a challenge of its own.

"Okay!" Mrs. Potter calls back from what sounds like the living room.

James and I head out the door. I had a plan, a system. I practically had a script in my head. I knew what I was going to say, I knew how I was going to say it. Merlin, I even knew how long I was going to pause before each statement! And it all flies out the window. I can't remember a lick of it. My mind just stops working.

We walk onto the beach in silence. We don't go too far (we don't even pass my house) before James speaks.

"Since we're just going to walk in silence, Evans, I think I'm going to go in. I have better things to do than try not to change personas in front of you." His tone and words hurt me.

I stop walking. James stops as well. I turn to face him. I try and look up into his face. What was I supposed to say? Where did it all begin?

"Well, um, er…You see…James…the, er, thing is—the thing is—"

James snorts and looks at the sky. He slightly shakes his head as if I'm a child wasting his time. A part of my brain tells me to get mad. It wants to get mad. It's furious that James isn't going to give me the time of day when all I want is to fix what we had, and then add a little more to it. But then I remember James's broken face in his room. I remember him yelling at me, that bit of hope I had squashed with my words. I probably deserve to be treated like a kid. After all, I might as well have stamped on his heart and thrown it out the window to a hungry shark. All because I was afraid. I won't get mad at him for that.

"…_can't even accept the fact that I love you and that you might feel the same way for me!"_

"Ilikeyou," I blurt out, so quick I can hardly even make out the words.

"What?" James asks.

I take a deep breath and try and say it slowly. "I like you." But this time I say it so low, it's hardly above a whisper, and at the same moment I said it, a family in the opposite direction laughed and shrieked loudly, which didn't help at all. What is wrong with me? Why can't I just say what I had wanted to say?

James angrily runs his hands through his air. "If you're not going to speak up so I can hear you, then there's no reason—"

"ARGH!" Right as I'm about to tell him what he's been wanting me to do for the past two years, he goes and gets me mad, even though I promised myself I wouldn't. Typical. "I LIKE YOU!" I scream. "I LIKE YOU, YOU STUPID GIT! Is that what you want to here?" James blinks and stares into my eyes. "I fancy you, James Potter! Is that what you wanted?"

James simply stares at me for a moment, and then his face breaks into a grin so wide it must be a world record. The waves of the ocean are crashing over each other, but all I'm focused on is a pair of twinkling eyes. "Yes," James says through his smile. And then there's a look in his eyes that makes my heart melt, my stomach flip, and my mouth curve. James leans forward, then I lean forward, and then we're finally—finally—kissing.

I, Lily Evans, am kissing James Potter. And I'm enjoying it.

I place my arms around James's neck, and he wraps his arms around my waist. He pulls me closer so my entire body is up against his. I don't mind one bit. James kisses and kisses me. I've never been kissed like this before. Ever. Even if James wasn't a superb kisser (which he definitely is), it would probably still be one of the best kisses I've had. Just because.

James's hand interweaves in my hair, and his warm lips move against mine. I pull him tighter against me. My knees slightly knock into his legs, but I barely notice and I doubt he does. I vaguely register—if even for a second—his muscular chest against my soft one. All I'm really focused on is how good it feels to be kissing James and how I really, really like being this close to him.

I pull away because I'm getting lightheaded from the lack of oxygen. Or is it from kissing James? I know that I needed oxygen. James, on the other hand, seems as if he could've gone on for ages.

We don't pull apart. James moves his hands back down to my hips and continues to hold me tight against him. My face and James's face are only centimeters apart. He's smiling, Merlin, he's smiling so much. I smile back, too. Just because. We stay like that for a moment before I move out of his grasp. James glances down, and then back up at me. And then back down again. He's slightly blushing. What is he on about?

Then James cautiously intertwines his fingers with mine. I almost laugh at him. He certainly had no problem kissing me and pulling me close, but he's so careful when it comes to holding my hand. It's so odd. And really, really sweet. I grin at James.

We start walking along the beach holding hands, my small pale one wrapped in his large tan one. Somehow, it's different from the few other times we have held hands. It feels weird, but not bad. Just like we'll have to get used to it. Which we will.

We're quiet for a few seconds before I say, "Can you imagine the looks on everyone's faces when they realize that James "Marauder" Potter is their Head Boy, and he's dating long-time enemy and current Head Girl, Lily Evans?"

James laughs. "I don't think they'll be too surprised." I get the feeling he's only partly joking.

I raise an eyebrow.

"Everyone knew I'd get you to be my girlfriend. You couldn't resist me forever," he says smugly.

Bragging already? Well that can't do. "Oh, but only because I heard the Giant Squid has a lady friend now and is currently unavailable. You were my next option."

James stops walking but I keep on going, my hand slipping from his. I take off my shoes and hold them in my hand, and decide to walk in the water, shallow enough that the highest droplets barely reach the middle of my calves. I innocently clasp my hands behind my back.

I hear a splutter behind me, and then footsteps running up to my side. James snakes an arm around my waist.

"Well, who really cares if I was your second choice? I was still right that you'd say yes to me one day."

"And I was still right that I'd have to go undergo extensive brain damage to say yes to you," I say as revenge for his cockiness.

"Brain damage?"

"Yes, you see, I was going for a swim," I say dramatically, "and I fell and tripped. I landed on a seashell—a monster, it was—and my brain was severly addled. I went bonkers. So bonkers, I began to think that you're attractive and funny and that I would actually like to be your girlfriend!"

"My girlfriend?" James mocks, playing along. "Must have been one hell of a seashell."

I stop walking and look at him. "Mmm, it was. Terrible, really, but I suppose that's my life now."

James lightly chuckles, and looks around. His eyes then find me, all of a sudden very serious. "You'll be my girlfriend then?" he quietly asks.

I can tell we're both thinking the same thing. After all this time of me saying no, I'm finally going to say…

"Yes." I lean forward and he closes his eyes.

I quickly kiss his cheek and begin to walk away, but a bout of water splashes my bum and the back of my legs. I whirl around to glare at James, but he's simply smiling with ease.

"What was that for?"

"For saying you'd have to be mentally addled to fancy me."

I throw my shoes back onto the sand, and then walk forward and kick water at him.

"Well, then that was for thinking that I would eventually say yes."

Another splash.

"That's for kissing me and running away."

I step closer. Water hits his face.

"That's for being a prat at school all those years."

My shirt is now wet. He laughs.

"That's for dating all the prats at school except me."

Droplets of water are on James's glasses. I smirk.

"That's for thinking it was a good idea to interrupt McGonagall's lecture to tell the whole class you thought I looked pretty that day."

Salt water in your mouth is not pleasant. James walks forward.

"That's for not remembering I actually said you were 'extraordinarily beautiful'."

I lean down and splash as much water forward as I can.

"And that's because you're James Potter."

"And this is because you're Lily Evans."

James wraps his arms around my waist, and I think he's going to kiss me again.

But of course he doesn't. That would be too predictable. Instead, he pulls me down so that I land in the water. He lands beside me and I'm partly lying on his chest. We are now completely wet. I sit up.

"You git! You sneaky, conniving git!" James just laughs. "You're awful, you know that? I do. I think you've told me enough times."

I stand up, mostly to hide my smile, but James pulls my hand back towards him. Of course, my teenage hormones that are now fully aware I have a boyfriend I can snog whenever I want force me to sit back down in the water; screw the clothes, hair, and makeup I'll get even more wet. Damn those hormones.

James looks at me and opens his mouth to say something, but a wave comes and hits us in the faces.

I turn away, and out of the corner of my eye I see Mum and Mrs. Potter standing on my porch watching James and me. I move my body more so I can look at them better, and even from here I can see their grins.

I roll my eyes.

Gossipy, nosy schoolgirls.

I turn to James to tell him about our mums, but he leans forward and begins to slowly kiss me. There's sand underneath my bum and legs, I'm covered with ocean water, and an extremely handsome, smart, funny git is kissing me and giving me butterflies in my stomach. The kiss tastes like saltwater.

I pull James closer, tangle my hands in his hair, and smile against his lips. What a bloody fantastic summer.

* * *

><p><strong>No, this is not the end. There is an epilogue and MAYBE another chapter. If it's another chapter, it might take long. Please bear with me. I will never abandon this story, and I hope you won't either, but getting snippy reviews about how I need to update faster and how readers are giving up on me really do not encourage me to want to write this anymore, even if that wasn't the intention of the reviewer(s). Special thanks to the Anon who sent good wishes towards my family and friends. They're all right.<strong>

**NOW ON A MORE POSITIVE NOTE.**

**I hope I did this chapter justice! Please tell me what you think! :)**

**MG**


	23. Cheers to The End

**Truly sorry, but there isn't much to say. Everything is fine with family and me. I just want to let it be known, though, that while I do love writing this story and I am genuinely so very, very pleased that others enjoy it, I started this as a hobby because that's what it is. This chapter should have been out sooner, and I'm sorry it wasn't, really, I am, and this isn't just for this chapter but also to any future stories, but fanfiction is a hobby to me, and it comes second to a number of things. I won't put my school work, my job, my family, or my athletics before writing. I'm sorry, but I was committed to those things way before this story. So, yes, I apoligze, but sometimes it may take me a while to get chapters up, but that is because I am busy, not because I am quitting. **

**I would like to write all the names down of everyone who reviewed, but so many have reviewed (EEP! :D) that it would take forever, and I seriously should have been sleeping an hour and a half ago, but I want to get this out, so thank you, thank you to everyone who reviewed! I'll go back and PM everyone tomorrow/Wednesday if they had specific questions/comments, but otherwise, thank you! :)**

**I do, however, have to respond to one person...**

**Anon: I sincerely hope you do NOT have an account, because if you did, I would have PMed you this right away and I wouldn't have had to post it to the chapter for everyone to see. Normally I wouldn't bother, but I really feel like I need to respond, so here goes. (Also, I don't know how many of the anon reviews were the same person, even though many felt like the same user. If you wrote an anon review, though, read this.) I was not holding this chapter hostage for more reviews. I have never nor will I ever do that. This story has to end, and I think I am ending it at a good place: the end of the summer. What you said does not really make sense, because everything has to end. The plot of Grease wasn't that Danny and Sandy get together and you see their entire relationship. The story was that this boy and girl who did get together (how was irrelevant) later ended up at the same school and the boy was different around school and his friends. The problem was how Danny and Sandy could keep that relationship because so many things had changed. It's the same with every book or movie out there. You could argue that Harry Potter should not have ended where it did because you didn't know how Ginny and Harry got together, how George healed over Fred's death, how Hogwarts was rebuilt, what happened to the Death Eaters, etc. Yet while that is all interesting to know, the story had to end, and it ended when the driving story line ended: Voldemort was defeated. Anything can go on forever, but stories are not meant to. This was a summer story that explains how James and Lily got together. It will end when they get together, it will end when summer ends. If you have anymore complaints/thoughts, please PM me.**

**And onto the longest chapter yet. :)**

* * *

><p>This is my least favorite part of the summer. It's like a bunch of horrible things wrapped up in one. If you take the flu, Gryffindor losing a Quidditch match to Slytherin, a T on a Transfiguration paper, and cramps, put them all together, tie a horrid bow on the package, and deliver it to me, you are basically handing me the last day of summer and the cleaning that goes with it.<p>

I woke up this morning in that way where you feel peaceful and lazy and…good. It was early, and I did not intend to get out of bed at the ungodly hour of seven in the morning. I was just going to stay in bed and think about nothing but the beach, James, relaxing, and the serenity I felt. But then Mum burst into my room.

"Rise and shine!" she had said. "Up, up, up!"

I groaned.

"Time to get up, Lils! We've got a busy day ahead of us."

"I'm just going to the beach with James today," I said with my face buried in my pillow.

"You can, but only after you clean."

"Clean?"

"We leave tomorrow, remember? We always clean our parts of the house the day before we leave. You're in charge of all of your room, the balcony, the bathrooms, and the porch today."

My heart dropped. We leave? Tomorrow? That means in just a few days I'll be back at school in my dark robes, sitting on hard wooden chairs, and staying up late with hand cramps as I try to finish a thousand different essays. I'll be back in the real world.

"Ungh… I don't want to go."

"You never do. But as long as you get the cleaning done and don't try to carry all your stuff to the beach so that you can live there forever, you can do whatever else you want to today."

I tried to do that when I was seven—refuse to go home. I dragged my blankets, pillows, four books, a box of biscuits, a jug of orange juice, and my stuffed bunny with me to the beach. I tried to make a "house" and it turned out quite nice, if I do say so myself, but Mum and Dad found me (obviously) and dragged me back inside.

So that is how I end up here, on the floor of my room, on my hands and knees, searching for the things I may or may not have kicked under the bed when I didn't feel like picking them up. I reach for my Herbology textbook, but my fingers only just graze the cover. I angrily huff. I'm having enough of a rotten day, what with it being The End, and this bloody book would like to sit on the floor, precisely in the center underneath my bed. I always knew I hated Herbology, and this is just further proof (in addition to the time in fifth year when a vicious plant decided it was going to try to rip out my hair) that Herbology hates me, too. Honestly. Who cares about plants anyway?

Professor Davenet does, though, and he makes us use our books every class, otherwise I would just leave the book under my bed to die. I extend my arm out as much as I can, urging my hand forward, but just when the tips of my fingers grab hold of the book, a spider crawls onto my hand. I shriek and jump.

Not a smart idea when your head is underneath a bed. The back of my head violently collides with the underside of my bed, and I can practically see my Herbology book laughing at me.

"Bugger, bugger! Oh, damn you, you bloody piece of disposable paper!"

"Such vulgar language," a voice says behind me. I turn to see James standing in my doorway looking as handsome as ever, his face torn between amusement and concern, his hair ridiculously messy.

"My mouth has a mind of its own when I'm in pain."

James chuckles. "Are you all right, though?"

"Yes. I just couldn't get my book, and a spider attacked me as I was reaching for it. The book's in the bloody center of the bed, the only part I can't reach."

"Couldn't you have used your wand and magicked it to you?"

…

"I can't find my wand," I lie.

James looks at my desk. My wand is the only thing lying on it. I blush violently and pretend to wipe some dirt off my knees. James walks forward and helps me up. "I'll help you find it later. But until then, _Accio Lily's Herbology textbook_." My book flies out from under my bed and into James's hands. He hands it to me.

"Thanks," I say sheepishly.

My wand. Honestly. How did I not think of using my wand? I probably just lost the only brain cells I had, what with banging my head on my bed.

I throw the stupid book on the floor. "What are you doing here so early, anyway?"

"I came to see you."

"This early?"

"Yup, I thought you were going to be sleeping and I was going to have to get you up myself, but your mum said you've been up for a bit."

"I'm cleaning today."

"I can see that."

"I'll be cleaning all day."

"That's unfortunate."

"You should leave."

"Why would I do that?"

"You don't like cleaning."

"But I like you," James says.

My lips instinctively curl up in a smile, and I get that goofy feeling, the kind of feeling that makes me feel as if I'm twelve years old with my first crush, the kind of feeling that just makes me want to smile for no apparent reason.

"All right then, grab the broom from the cupboard, Mr. Potter. We've got some Muggle cleaning to do."

* * *

><p>I think it's safe to say that James and I get next to no work done. James gets the broom and begins sweeping my porch and room while I gather my various belongings.<p>

"Tell me again why we can't just use our magic to clean," James says.

I shrug. "I dunno, I mean…I guess we could, but I've always cleaned the exact same way, in the exact same order, every summer. It'd be weird to start doing it all by magic, y'know? I mean, if you really want to, we can—"

"No, no, this is fine. Besides, this is the first time you've had a gorgeous bloke in here helping you, so it's a double bonus."

"Dreams do come true," I say, laughing.

James laughs, too, before saying, "What a lucky bird you are." He then talks about how Mrs. Potter's been packing and sniffling all morning, even recalling a specific memory pertaining to each object. Apparently, she even began crying while hugging Pinka and said, "I remember when we first tried to bake a cake to take to the Evans's house, Pinka. Look at us now!" Pinka fainted in Mrs. Potter's arms because she didn't know how to react. James's mum didn't notice for a good minute, and then it took her another two minutes to revive Pinka.

I try not to laugh. Really, it's not funny, sad almost, certainly not funny. Yet I can practically feel myself trembling with the effort to hold in my laugh.

But then James chuckles and says, "My mum's a nutter, she is," and I lose it. I start giggling and guffawing and it's not supposed to be amusing, but I can't stop. All I see is kind, elderly Mrs. Potter crying reminiscent tears into an unconscious house elf's apron.

James looks at me strangely for a moment, and then he sighs. "Apparently, so is my girlfriend…"

I stop laughing and glare at him. Well, I try to. He just looks at me with this knowing, charming smile, not saying a word, and I can't keep a straight face. I try to hide my smile by picking up a lone sandal at the back of my closet.

"Just keep cleaning, Potter."

* * *

><p>James and I are "cleaning" the porch when I decide I'd rather not spend six hours attempting to straighten out the house, and that I really should send him home. There wasn't anyone around, so we decided we would enchant our brooms to sweep the porch for us. Which definitely isn't cheating.<p>

That much.

We were awful at it, and we kept dropping our brooms, trying to race them, and intentionally knocking the other's over. After that, we charmed two wet cloths to clean the walls and railing (unnecessary, admittedly), and that just got out of hand.

We tried to see who could fling theirs the fastest down the rail without it falling, and then we invented some sort of game where we would fling our cloths forward and try to hit one another. We would basically lunge out of the way, and when the cloth didn't hit the opponent, the person would scrub the wall for a good—oh, I don't know—maybe, two seconds? We were obviously getting a lot of work done.

Surprisingly, James doesn't want to go home. "But it was just getting fun!"

"Yes, but then we'd really never get anything done. Besides, I still want to go say goodbye to Claire later. Do you want to come?"

I don't miss the wrinkling of his nose. "No, I said bye to her last night actually."

"Oh? How'd that go?" I do not care, I do not care, I do not care…

"Fine. Lasted all of a minute. I said I was leaving, she said bye, I said it was nice meeting her, she said the same and that she had a good summer, I said it was nice being friends with her, she said I was a good kisser—"

"_WHAT_?"

"Only joking, Lils, she didn't say anything of it. The whole conversation was unfortunate and short, though, so I wouldn't like to go back."

"Oh, hardy har har, how funny of you," I say. "But I do have to go see her, and to do that, I have to finish cleaning, and that won't be done in any reasonable amount of time with you around."

James shrugs. "If you're sure. Sit next to me at dinner?"

I chuckle. "Of course."

James grins before he lazily walks back to his house. I pause for a second, and then I really start cleaning.

James and I did get some work done, I'll admit that. If it had just been me, though, I probably would've been done ages ago. Still… Cleaning with him was ten times more fun. Because right now, as I sweep underneath the chairs and in all the nooks and crannies, I realize just how tediously boring this kind of cleaning is. I've done it so many times, it's automatic enough that the whole process is now mindless. I feel like I would be preparing myself for History of Magic classes this year, except I dropped the class—thank Merlin.

The dreariness of it all does make me work faster, though, just so that I'll be that much closer to finishing. Before I know it (or not really, since I feel every minute pass), I'm done with the porch. I collapse on the cushioned bench.

One break won't hurt. Even unpaid, forced laborers get to rest their feet for a minute, right?

I close my eyes, just for a moment, and all I hear is the constant yet ever-changing rhythm of the ocean, but the sounds of an opening and closing door and a pair of sandals hitting the floor interrupt it.

I open my eyes to find Petunia walking toward me, looking mature yet young in a formfitting light blue tee and frayed shorts. She always dresses different at the summers. I've never really noticed before, but it's one of the little ways she lets her hair down at Shrivers.

She sits next to me. "Hi."

"Hi."

Nothing more, nothing less. Anything else would lead to disaster. The last thing I need is for my fat gob to blurt out utter nonsense, so I literally have to force myself not to speak. It really shouldn't be this hard.

But after a few minutes pass, when I know I should have started cleaning again, I still haven't said anything (neither has she), and the tenseness between us has almost completely evaporated.

"It was a nice summer, huh?" Petunia asks.

I'm sure she's not referring to James and I getting together, or Mum and Dad befriending a witch and wizard, but more to the little things we did as a family, things we always do every summer. The times where we put together puzzles, went to the cinema, and ate so much of Mum's cookies all we could do was lounge around and complain about how we shouldn't have had that much while we watch cheesy television programs. Things like that, those little things.

"Yeah."

"But they always are, aren't they?"

"They are."

She doesn't say anymore, and neither do I. We sink back into silence, and for perhaps what feels like the first time all summer, I don't think. I don't ponder, worry, analyze, or plan. Instead, I just sit there on that bench with my sister, enjoying the exceptionally ordinary moment, and thinking of nothing else.

"Lily! Petunia!" Mum calls. I open my mouth to answer back, but Mum has already burst through the front door and is staring at Petunia and me. For a moment, her eyebrows shoot up, and I see the surprise in her eyes, but then she smiles, one of those smiles that tells me she's deeply pleased.

She sets herself between the two of us, and it's a tight fight, but neither Petunia or I say anything, and Mum doesn't get up. She is quiet for a moment, and then she sets one hand on Petunia's knee, the other on mine.

"Oh, I love my girls… My two perfect girls… You know that, right? You know that you two are perfect, don't you?"

There's a pause, and then I say, "Yes, Mum."

Petunia hesitates for a moment more, barely more than a breath, and I feel her looking at me, but then says, "Yes, Mum, we know."

Mum pats our legs. "Good, and don't you forget it, no matter what anyone else says!" She looks around. "Good Lord, Lily, you still haven't finished cleaning? It's taking you ages to get this done!"

Thank you, Mum, I am quite aware that I am wasting my last day of sunshine and ocean and sand and fun cleaning this house. Thank you for reminding me, though; I had almost forgotten for a moment.

"I'm almost done," I indignantly say instead.

Mum heads inside. "Get to it then. Petunia's already done."

Another pause.

Is it normal for me to have this much trouble to simply be quiet? To not talk? To not just spout out every thought that comes to me? I really don't think it is.

"I guess you should get cleaning, then," Petunia says.

"Probably."

"I'll leave you to it."

"Okay, thanks, Tuney."

I cringe. Tuney reminds her of when we were friends. We being friends reminds her of why we are no longer friends. We no longer being friends reminds her of magic. Magic reminds her of Hogwarts. Hogwarts reminds her of everything she hates. Everything she hates reminds her of how she hates me. Calling her Tuney is the equivalent of getting my own sister to remember her hatred for me, and here I am, calling her Tuney. Brilliant.

Surprisingly, shockingly, miraculously, she almost smiles. It's just a shadow of a smile, but it's real, nothing forced, nothing fake.

"Bye, Lily."

* * *

><p>"Can I write to you?" Claire asks.<p>

Er… "Yeah," I tell her, "you just have to send it to my house, and then my parents will pass it on to my school. We've got weird mailing rules there." Like that all post is delivered through owls.

Claire smiles. "I really did enjoy this summer, Lily. I'm glad I met you."

"Me too." I'm only a tiny bit surprised to realize that I actually mean it. "We had fun, didn't we?"

"We did… But hey, I'm sure you'll have fun back at school with James." She gives me a suggestive grin.

"Ha, yeah, I suppose so…"

She misinterprets my awkward response and says, "Don't worry about what happened between James and I. You two go together better, anyway, and Conner and I have much more in common."

"Thanks," I say. "And that's good, I'm glad you're happy."

She wistfully sighs and stares off into space. "Yeah…" As if she then remembers I am there, she adds, "So I'll see you next summer?"

I hug her and say, "Yeah, maybe."

I don't have the heart to tell her probably not.

* * *

><p>Everyone at the table is feeling stuffed from all the food Mum and Mrs. Potter prepared for dinner, yet is still trying to finish Mum's vanilla and strawberry cake, when Dad clinks his spoon against his glass of wine. I instantly know what's coming. I suppress a groan. He slides his chair back, the legs scraping against the wooden floor, and Mum winces.<p>

"I'd like to make…a toast," Dad says dramatically.

"Oh, Lord," Petunia mutters.

I stifle a giggle, but when she shoots me a look that clearly says _Shut up because I was not supposed to say that out loud and if you draw attention to me I will kill you_, it vanishes.

Dad holds his glass in the air as if it's a prized possession, the most valuable drinking glass ever bought at a flea market. (No, seriously.) "First¸ I propose a toast to Lily and James, who will do an excellent job as Head Boy and Head Girl, and will lead their school to greatness. It will be difficult to let our children go to finish their last year of school, but all of us here know that they will be the best Heads Hogwarts has seen, and that they will make great things happen. But for now, we wish them a successful school year, where they keep their minds on their school work, and their hands _off_ each other."

James had his hand on my knee under the table, and even though he'd occasionally rub his thumb across my leg, it was entirely innocent. But when Dad says that, and he looks at James with a smile on his face but a Don't-you-think-of-touching -or-hurting-my-daughter look in his eyes, James's hand promptly leaves my person. I'm a bit miffed that my dad would say something like that—at the dinner table no less. I mean, honestly—but then I realize James and I can give him some peace of mind and let him think what he wants, since he'll never know what we'll get up to together at school anyway.

But then I feel like an awful, slaggy daughter, and I'm tempted to douse myself with the pitcher of ice cold water right then and there as punishment for my immoral thoughts. Except that could lead to awkward questions.

"Yes, of course, sir, Mr. Evans. I wouldn't—"

Mum laughs. "Good grief, Will! Leave them be. We were all teenagers once. Everyone has certain feelings at that age."

I involuntarily do an odd mixture of spluttering and scoffing, and the water that was in my mouth disgustingly flies out.

I just spit water out of my mouth in front of my boyfriend and his mum. Oh, my God. My face burns even more.

"I'm sure your father remembers what's it's like to be a young boy with a girl on his arm," Mum says, dabbing the corner of her mouth with her napkin as if this is a perfectly normal dinner conversation.

Dad thinks about this for a moment, but instead of that comforting him, he looks at James with a new expression, part angry, part fearful, as I suppose he remembers what exactly boys are like at that age. James slides his chair farther away from me.

I look at Mrs. Potter, and she is laughing. _Laughing_! I fail to see the humor in this situation. I mean, bloody hell, my mother is discussing the sexual urges I may have at the dinner table in front of my boyfriend!

"Plus, Lily knows all about being responsible when it comes to—"

"MUM!"

Pack your bags, Clarence, we're going to go live in a hole in a secluded forest and never emerge again.

Mum pauses for a moment, the cake on her fork hovering in the air. I stare at her, my eyes wide, my face surely on fire, and my eyes flicker to James who is looking frightened and embarrassed, not to mention that he seems like he's trying to hold back a laugh—surely directed at me. "Er…" Mum clears her throat. "Continue with your toast, honey."

If I could punish my parents for being embarrassing, they wouldn't be leaving their room for a month.

Dad was standing throughout the entire ordeal, and now he looks twice as awkward and almost as uncomfortable as me. "I, uh, well, that's not to say I don't like you, James, because you're a fine fellow, and I respected your father, but Lily, she's my…she's my little girl and—"

I literally bang my head on the table. Mrs. Potter erupts with giggles, and when she looks at my mum, Mum starts laughing, too. Soon the two mothers are giggling up a storm, and both Mum and Mrs. Potter look younger than they have in a while. A tiny part of me still wants to be mad, but it disappears when Mum and Mrs. Potter keep giggling and looking at each other the way they are, and all I think of is Marlene and I, and how I know that will be us forty years from now.

Dad flops down onto his chair and runs his hands over his face, but he begins chuckling, too. Petunia even lets out an exasperated giggle, and when she glances at me, she rolls her eyes, equally mortified of our parents.

James leans over. "Merlin, that was bad. I thought your dad was going to run me through with that butter knife."

"At least your mum didn't start talking about sex and protection during dinner!"

"True." He looks at his mum, a certain emotion in his eyes that I can't quite place. "She hasn't laughed like that in a while."

"Neither has my mum."

I grab James's hand and hold onto it, screw the lecture on sex and purity.

It takes a good minute for their laughter to die down, and then Mrs. Potter is only smiling and wiping a tear from her eyes.

"Amy, dear," she says, "I'm glad we became friends this summer."

Mum sobers up for a moment, but then one of those rare smiles is on her face. Not because she never smiles—God, no. Rare because they're truly genuine and she saves those smiles for special people.

"You, too, Ella." Petunia looks at the pair with a hint of fondness in her eye that says that even though Mrs. Potter's a witch, she knows that kind of relationship is valuable.

Dad dramatically clears his throat. "May I finish my toast now?"

"As long as you don't say anything embarrassing again."

I snort.

"Now where was I?" Dad questions aloud, raising his glass again. "Oh, right. To Petunia, who is heading off to another year at school where she will without a doubt be successful in everything she does. A toast to the hopes that this new year will be everything she wants, and that Vernon Dursley will continue to make my daughter happy, and that he will realize just how lucky he is to have her, so he'll hurry up and make her a Dursely."

Petunia shakes her head as if she's embarrassed, but I know she's pleased that everyone thinks she and Vernon will end up married and happy. "Thanks, Daddy."

Dad nods his head and smiles, but he does not sip from his glass, for he always waits until he finishes his notoriously long toasts. "And to the Potters, who made this summer special in a way that we will never forget. Our two families are extremely different, but I have no doubt in my mind that the Potters and Evans were meant to be neighbors this summer. While Charles is not here with us at this table, though, we know that he will always be watching over us, especially over his son and wife. He was a great man and had a wonderful life, and I am thankful that I was fortunate enough to get to spend some of his last days with him."

Mrs. Potter looks teary-eyed, but Mum reaches out and holds her hand. James's grip tightens around me, but I rub his hand and he slightly relaxes.

"Last but not least, to this fantastic summer we just had, the coming summers we've yet to experience, and all the days in between." Dad moves his glass towards the center. "Cheers."

Six glasses clink together when they meet above the middle of the table.

"Cheers!"

* * *

><p>Sneaking out the last day of summer is a requirement for any teenager. And what would I be to not follow through on the most basic principle of summer and being young?<p>

I'd be barmy, that's what. That's how I find myself jumping off my balcony yet again and walking towards James on the beach.

"Hey."

James grins. "Hey." We start walking.

"So, that dinner, huh?" James jokes.

"Ugh. It was awful, completely and utterly awful."

"Could've been worse."

"Yeah?"

"Our parents could hate each other. At least we know we have their blessing."

"I think we've known that for a while," I say while rolling my eyes, thinking of the many times our interfering mothers tried to bring us together.

"A secret, forbidden relationship could have been fun, though…"

"Mmm, well, technically speaking," I say, stopping and lowering my voice to a whisper, "us being out here is forbidden, we're going to have to keep what we do a secret, and we can definitely have fun."

James begins to whisper, too. "Sounds exciting, Evans, but I bet we could get into loads of trouble." He begins to finger a lock of my hair, and my stomach flips when I notice the way he's looking at me.

"Tons."

James gets closer, and his intricate hazel eyes are burning into mine. I feel as if I would gladly go through four plus years of his heckling again just to get to the point where he stares at me like I'm the most amazing thing he's ever seen.

"Then we'll just have to be really quiet…"

I close the gap between us. His mouth is soft and warm on mine, and his hands are holding my face, bringing it closer to him, making my skin burn. I vaguely realize that I don't care what my dad says, I hope James kisses me and holds me the way he is now when school starts again.

I break away. "We'll never manage to be quiet with you out here," I whisper.

James laughs. "What if I promise to try really hard?"

"It's still impossible for you."

He shrugs, and we start walking again. "You're right, but I think whatever punishment my mother could produce would be worth it."

I girlishly giggle. "Definitely."

"So what should we do on our last night here? Throw a party, rob a bank, snog all night…?"

As soon as he asks, I know. "Let's go swimming!"

"In our clothes?"

I pause. I didn't think of that. But what if…

"No, we're taking our clothes off." James's eyes widen to the size of saucers. "But not naked either! Merlin, no. We're swimming in our undergarments. It's just like our swimsuits, basically."

James doesn't say anything.

"Do you not want to?" The idea suddenly sounds very, very stupid. Oh, hey, I'm going to sneak out and then suggest my boyfriend and I of less than a week are going to go swim in the ocean in our knickers and while we're at it, why don't we just decide to stuff our heads in a pile of sand and—

"No, it's fun, I'm just…surprised. I never thought you would suggest stripping in public, Lily." James winks.

I feel heat rise to my cheeks. "It's not stripping! It's substitute swimwear!"

James laughs. Loudly. The git. "Right."

"It is!"

"Okay." He starts to take off his shirt and shorts. I try not to look. "Then hurry up and get in your swim costume, Lily." I can tell he's trying not to laugh at me. He's failing spectacularly.

"Go in the water first. And no looking!" I sound like a five year old. Fantastic.

James shakes his head but goes into the water, his back towards me while I undress—er, get into my substitute swim costume. Once I'm in the water, I tell James he can turn around now. He grins a goofy grin and swims closer to me.

"No funny business, though," I tell him, "and I mean it."

"Yes ma'am," he says like a soldier.

I splash water at him, but it doesn't hit. We don't say anything for a moment, choosing to simply drift with the waves and look at the stars.

"Did you think the summer was going to turn out like this?" James asks me.

_Hell. No._ is my first response, but I decide not to say it.

"No. Did you?"

"Definitely not. Are you glad it turned out this way?"

I think about it for a second. I would change some stuff, sure. My few fights with Petunia. Dad still not being here the whole summer. Nate. The Death Eaters. Mr. Potter dying… But everything, every bit of it, lead to this moment, and at this moment, I am completely and utterly happy.

"You mean am I glad that what used to be the world's biggest git ended up across the street from me this summer? Absolutely."

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><p><strong>I'll save all the gushy you-guys-are-the-best for the epilogue. So yes, there WILL be one, and it will take less than a week, PROMISE.<strong>

**I'd love to hear what everyone thinks, though! Unless it's that you hate me because I took too long and I'm rude and selfish, because then you can keep that to yourself. ;P**

**MG**


	24. Nineteen Years Later

**I would just like to start by saying thank you to every person who has ever reviewed, encouraged me to keep going, given me suggestions, and helped me get better at writing:**

**(List of names. Mistake. Skip.)**

**AriannaSaffyreMalfoy, yellow14, softasthunder, AnotherNamelessAuthor, Bleep, Missing Missy, Almost Genius, Eleos, El Leon Y La Oveja, xo rosie ox, Leena, Elle, The Two Girls, Analie Janes, I-Siriusly-Love-Black, PenNameless1994, NegligibleNaina, DearMariaCountMeIn, JackieMooneyLestrange, Tyem Marodyor, valenari, Straight up Marauder, Shhayy-j11, crazymacky, Luannie, Roseflower94, MaryOlivia, PenguinBoxers, Heimarmene, ladyoftimeandangels, Rani Jashalithie, the blibbering humdinger, I Randomly Change My Pen Name, ariana-xx, SpencerReidFan89, Sammy-U, wingswordsandmetaphors, Kjc13, xMissWeasley11x, AcrosstheWater, Hurricane K, WhenTheMoonShines, lilybethluna, ginnyweasleylover99, Miss-Independent146, VoldemortHugger, NovelNerd97, Peace-bookluva, Nightlight753, writergal24, Young and Living, StillLearningHowToFly, xjustarandomreaderx, percysis16, Sarahrules336, lizthegingerone, chocolatesnipe, PoohBearGoesGangster, chili's-girl, musingmarauder, JPLE, marinewife08, Blind Mind Lover, Marauder Megan, percabethshamus, Gray Fedora, lifendeathmade, Aff-nity, Worldnerd12, Night's Warrior, I 3 Toothpaste, So 'blank' killed 'blank. Fin, Super Cara,The Four Maraudettes, Juju Kitten, Kenzieloveify, ClimbingMonkey13, DanceDiva, sin alma, zatl,youawitchornot, ilovemybestfriends, Nobody u know, Emullz, MrsPotato100, MedzR3, summertimewriter, ButlersTheJob, Narai9, Waverider53, .113, thepotionsmaster7, WickedCharm, bookwormtsb, Er-my-nee Weasley, semperfortis, GossipGirl27, bobbypingirl101, AshleyM15, alohamora080, moonlitpathways, PhoenixofIce, chocomonkey1018, Stargazer200, Cookie Domination,JazzLunatica, urstory, The Evil Policifer, jwtwifan, xTractx, Mrs. Catherine Potter, YourAngelicVampyre, Sigy Artyn, Pagan Witch Girl, xXjaziXx, ProudMudblood42, AnotherNamelessAuthor, worldnerd12, Eligoop, Violingeeknm, Clarissa Jackson, Skye531, Avada Kedavra Avada Off, disney-hp-freak, isabella, InLoveWithTheDoctor, Moonlight Grove, markf50, FreezingPenguins, L'amour est vie, xjustarandomreaderx, ItDidntMeanForever, Stroke of Coffee, thatweasleykid, thepinkhouseowner, sephiesport, , Blair P, Hecate'sMushroomMinions, SeriouslySiriusBlack, Shadows of Snowfire, The Bitch Next Door, Geoo'97, roflshvuakomail, Grecia, Swwets5236, LovelyGirthls, Blue Wrackspurts, Happy Pineapple, RagnorakxKitty, head-forever-in-the-clouds, Noelle Seren, yumyumdimsum, SiriuslySiera, WillowBee, out-woop-woop, bakemeapie, ElektricCurrent, Fangalitious, DreamASweetDream, team., TheStagAndDoeXx, LiveLaughLove53, JamesFreakingPotter, Jaisler, Yumi Stern, musiclover99, Claws254, The Slug Club, , IwillAKyou, Random05, pud94, bubble drizzles, J-star Black, ToothpasteDrool, Ojjy, teddyandlilyforever, KellyNicoleSum, A Lily In Highgarden, aprilx14, Redvines98, bakemeapie, Mjkenn01, Hobokin, Swallow in the Cloud, Frostyfriend96, Blackheart09, 3ln0r, FlowerProngs, Arnie-Rocks, Miss Weaslette, Lais, anavihs, chrissy, storycat12, ., romiofinchel24, Jassy Smiley, blueapples, Ms. Nuns Jean Ears, adrianna-xx, Kay McNell, Mary, Dewfrost314, sparrowflyaway, SigmoidDarkz, OurQueenJKR, Sabrina Weasley-Potter, TheBakedPotato, youdon'tknowme123, The Mysterious E, graybabe, Senta1000, livetoloveharrypotter, ihaveasandbox, Lord Toewart, , azkabanished, sreduaram, Emmett-Cullen's-Biggest-Fan, IAmInWonderland, Evangelinemadonna, LilyxJames4ever, AngieKangaroo, Renee, ana12-09, isigirl, dancegirl232, Ranma's girl1, Imaginone, Hanne Potter, darling-everythingsonfire-x, Bennett, mischeiftobemanaged, rainbow in the grey, quillbug, 04, heather2408, TMI, yomma, NoNeed99, Ava Miranda Dakedavra, EnchantedWords17, NeverTickleASleepingDragon3, LittleMissFizzingWhizzbees, geraldine, harry potter is my muse, VoldemortIsGoingDown, 95, Natalie Dae Carr, Anti-Banana19, Luna96, iheartweasleytwins, Aqua Cahill, sonnii, junebugbug96, cellist4life, vball19mags, LoveLiterature, MissGarcia-Schmidt-Maslowluver, CalmToxic, Isycat, Shooting-Starkid, If-Only-Love-Was-The-Answer, Twilley Moon, Yellow Hannah, .x, The Sociopath Effect, Madipwns512, harrypotterforever5678, .., LittleMissLovegood, MrsPotato100, .mightier, RachelDJack, MollieEmma, amyXD, mysteriouslife, ILoveSiriusBlack4, Nadejsda, and catchthegoldensnitch7. **

**Almost halfway through I realized that posting all those names is sort of like bragging, and takes a LONG time, and I wanted to delete it, but I was halfway done, so dammit, I was going to finish. Sorry for all that taken space. :/**

**ONTO THE CHAPTER! **

* * *

><p>Nineteen Years Later<p>

The elderly man's bright blue eyes scanned the vault, looking for what he did not know. He had arrived at Gringotts for his own personal reasons, but something in him asked to enter the Potter vault.

It would have been extremely difficult—almost impossible—to enter the vault of "the Chosen One" given the current circumstances, but he _was_ Albus Dumbledore. After a few magical tests, a menacing-looking goblin had led Dumbledore to Harry Potter's vault. Dumbledore had tried to make a bit of conversation with the goblin—mostly to see how the goblin would feel towards a wizard like him. The bearded man said, "Nice autumn day today, isn't it? Perfect for running errands." The goblin—Brakum was his name—did not look Dumbledore in the face, instead choosing to train his beady black eyes on Dumbledore's withered, dead hand before grunting something that could have been an agreement. Dumbledore was displeased that Brakum had chosen to act that way, but it did not surprise him. Times were changing.

Now, as Dumbledore glanced around the Potter vault, he wondered what he was looking for. Harry had been in there before, but Dumbledore doubted that the young, previously poor boy ever did much than grab the money he needed and leave. It was a large vault and he knew that some of Lily and James's valuables had ended up there, tucked away in the back behind all the coins. He doubted Harry knew this, though.

Dumbledore thought back to when he was in the Weasley's broom closet with the orphaned boy not too long ago. The Hogwarts' Headmaster knew that life would be harder on Harry with the sudden and tragic death of his godfather, but when Harry had said to him, "It's just hard to realize he won't write to me again," in regards to Sirius, it struck Dumbledore that Harry knew very little about his parents and his parents' best friend.

All of Sirius's possessions were moved into Harry's vault, and some of Lily and James's possessions had been there, and Dumbledore felt that there had to be something in there for Harry. There had to be something that Dumbledore could give to him that would show him who Lily and James were, who Sirius was before prison, and that even though there were many deaths around them, and only more coming, Harry had a courageous, honorable family that loved him, even if they were not there with him.

Brakum waited in the entrance as Dumbledore traveled deeper, his purple robes swirling around him. He traveled to the back of the vault, to the parts that would be deemed unnecessary to investigate. At first, it looked that there would only be more gold, but then Dumbledore saw a broom handle, almost hidden away. He recognized it as the broom James Potter had ridden as Quidditch captain during his seventh year of school. Near the broom was an enormous, intricate chest coated with a thin film of dust. He recognized it as the wedding gift Minerva McGonagall had given to James and Lily. James claimed he knew she always had a soft spot for him. The dark brown chest was full of various items: a broom clearly made for a toddler, a colorful quilt, stacks of books and parchments, photographs (both Muggle and wizard), old records, and a sleeve of elegant white fabric Dumbledore knew to be Lily's wedding dress were just some of the objects.

None of it appeared particularly meaningful, and Dumbledore was unsure how items were chosen to go into the vault or stay behind, but in every item, there was a bit of Lily, a bit of James. Attached to each object was a story of who they were, stories that could be explained or stories that would never be revealed. The Muggle novel _A Tale of Two Cities_ might have been Lily's favorite, and the closed Snitch was often found on James's person when he was in school. They were things Harry might have found meaningful had his parents lived.

A cherry wood jewelry box rested on top of the quilt. Dumbledore picked it up and opened it, knowing it was Lily's. It was full to the top with random treasures that somehow defined who she was. A bluish stone, a golden necklace with a seashell pendant, a still photograph of the Evans family in front of a blue house, Lily's Head Girl badge, a photograph of Lily and Marlene McKinnon, a puzzle piece, and a folded piece of parchment rested on the top, burying a few other items. The box was Lily Evans Potter in every way.

Dumbledore took out the parchment and unfolded it. He started to read it, but upon realizing it was extremely personal, he began to close it, but a particular word jumped out at him: Voldemort. Dumbledore read the sentence that contained the word, a feeling of unexplained excitement stabbing at his brain. _And because Voldemort is looking for a cave. _Voldemort was looking for a cave… Dumbledore quickly read the entire letter.

His memory sparked, Dumbledore remembered hearing a whisper that Death Eaters had been caught looking for a cave for Voldemort, and that they had tried to attack two Hogwarts' students, Lily and James, but nothing the Order or Dumbledore knew indicated Voldemort needed a cave, and nothing about it ever came up again. The thought left Dumbledore entirely. Yet now here it was, reminding Dumbledore that Voldemort was looking for a cave.

Many years ago, when Dumbledore had inquired about a Tom Riddle, the orphanage's caretaker had mentioned something about a cave. "We take them out, you know, once a year, to the countryside or seaside—well, Amy Benson and Dennis Bishop were never quite right afterwards, and all we ever got out of them was that they'd gone into a cave with Tom Riddle," she had said.

Dumbledore's mind raced, yet he already knew the conclusion. Voldemort had been looking for a cave many years ago, the cave where he terrorized two children on one of his outings with the orphanage. That place was special to Voldemort, a place where he had first begun to use his magic to inflict pain on others. It was exactly the kind of meaningful place that Voldemort would hide a Horcrux. He wondered if he had not found Lily Potter's letter how long it would have taken him to remember the cave…

Dumbledore read the paper again, but there was no indication on whether Voldemort found the cave or where it could possibly be. Dumbledore would find it, though. He had to find it so that the Horcruxes could be destroyed and Harry could destroy Voldemort.

Harry.

The old man paused for a moment, and realized what he was doing. He should not be going through Harry's deceased parents' belongings, bringing the pieces of them to Harry in the hopes that they will comfort him. Harry needed to find those objects on his own. He needed to learn about his parents and see his old house and visit their grave on his own terms, not because Dumbledore brought Harry to do so because he felt guilty knowing that he too would soon leave Harry.

Dumbledore was folding the parchment and placing it back in the box when he saw a tiny hand run through a mop of black hair. He pulled from the jewelry box a picture of Lily and James, about the age of seventeen, standing together on a beach. James had his arm around Lily, who had a bright smile on her face, her emerald eyes shining. James reached up and ran his fingers through his hair again, and the photograph Lily turned towards him and rolled her eyes. Photograph James saw, but he merely grinned and kissed her cheek. Lily faintly blushed. Both Lily and James looked at Dumbledore and beamed, their grins similarly charming and proud, almost as if they knew what exactly they had done by falling in love that summer.

* * *

><p><strong>That's it! <em>Summer Magic<em> has come to an end. I NEVER thought it'd reach 1000 reviews and that so many people would enjoy, but it has, and they have, and I'm soooo glad. :)**

**It'd mean a lot to me if everyone who read this story could put some final thoughts, what they liked, what they didn't, what needs to be improved upon, etc. **

**I hope to see you all again, either on one of my future stories or on one of yours! If you're looking for any more J/L fics, check out my favorite stories on my profile. Personally, though, I would recommend The Life and Times by Jewels5, Resolution by Weasley Wannbee, A Different View on Love by merlinhelz, and Boyfriend by Molly Raesly. Also, I think I might sign up to be a beta come this summer, so keep an eye out for that if you would ever be interested. :)**

**Bye for now!**

**MG**


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